Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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I call bullshit. I don't get how you could be a DJ in a strip club while being an introvert. The place is full of thirsty dudes who come to gawk at some hotties' bare asses. It's easily in the top five of the places where you shouldn't work if you were an introvert.


I don't see why you couldn't be a DJ and an introvert. When you're DJ'ing, you're mostly concentrating on your music and your equipment. Sometimes people can be drunk and start bothering you into playing a song, but I don't think it's been that common at the events I've seen.

During weekends in the 90's, I moonlighted as a DJ on weekends in Detroit; several of my more serious DJ friends had regular spots at a a couple stripclubs, and on occasion I'd fill in for them when they started doing warehouse party gigs.

As far as DJ work goes, strip clubs are the worst, only a step above wedding receptions. The girls & club owners have their own playlists which are provided before the night starts, and strippers get fairly unpleasant when their normal set list isn't followed, or another stripper used it earlier (not that I blame them, but still).

Patrons generally aren't allowed to make requests, and the in the clubs I worked the DJ booths were kept seperate from the patrons.

I've been an introvert my whole life, yet DJ'ing early on allowed me to partake in the social & technical aspects of music, without really having to be social.

But I couldn't wait to not need to do stripclub gigs anymore; the drama alone set my nerves on edge, and I rapidly learned by observation that strippers are a NO-GO under any circumstance.
 
Newer to this thread and still making my way through but I'm not new to the concepts polyamory (or watching people and relationships crash and burn over it)

Just jumped over to the r/poly Reddit and found some gems right away (also wtf is up with them all loving steven universe?)

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"Non hierarchical" in your harem... How deliciously college hippie.

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Being someone's cum dump and side car leaves you feeling less valued? I only have one word for that


Maybe it's because she hasn't had alot of experience yet. I'm sure that self worth thing will go away eventually :story:

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"It's like the system of relationships that keep in place the structures of like capitalist misogyny power or something"

It's shit like this that reminds me of the highschool "artsy" types that all preach about not following social norms and being a (que South Park goth references) CONFORMIST and it follows these people usually evolve to the smug college hippies that believe they have transcended judgements.

LMFAO Isn't judging people just apart of human nature?

Like power structures and hierarchies

How is it possible for a person to see someone and not see things in them or evaluate or assess... Are they trying to circumvent the biological necessity for discernment itself

Who are these people and WHY?
 
It's actually possible to set up a legal entity with the protections of a civil marriage for three or more people in the USA. My ex knew a lawyer whose specialty involved doing this for people.

No prizes given for guessing why she's my ex.
I'm curious. How did that work? Was it something along the lines of setting up a corporation or something? (How romantic.)
 
I'm curious. How did that work? Was it something along the lines of setting up a corporation or something? (How romantic.)

I would not know about over there, but I know for the Benelux (and Sweden has something exactly if not very close to it) they have something called a "samenlevingscontract", which literally means "living together contract". It can contain what you want, as much as you want making it like a marriage and more (quite similar anyway), or as little as you want. You cannot just draw one up yourself, it has to be done with lawyers and through a notary, who has to have it on file, if not most judges will declare it invalid when it comes to issues with taxes or government (inheritance, paternity, estates and taxes, etc). In Sweden the term is exactly the same, they call it "sambo" for short (forgot the long word for it), forgot the details for a sambo though but it was quite similar to the Benelux.

A marriage you could import, like from Morocco or Turkey for example (99% of marriages with multiple wives were just that), could be between many wives and a man, as long as you say "religion, racism!" and they just accepted it. And then the government caught on, a dude with 4 wives in 4 homes on welfare as he had a gf in his own house, nope. So now a marriage is strictly between 2 people. So polygamists use the samenlevingscontract but just have a lot more people sign it. And because such a contract can contain exactly what a registered partnership entails (save for a few details) there you go.
Important to note that a registered partnership is a marriage where you do not have to say yes but still have to bring witnesses, and where you do not automatically were the daddy like in marriage, and they changed that to always the daddy in 2014 anyway. There are a few more things, like in case of divorce and then death in marriage all your stuff goes to your ex, the end, which does not fly in registered partnerships. All in all the differences are minor, and it takes 2 minutes and 2 signatures and saying yes to each other and you are now husband and wife instead of partners, the differences are that minor.

You can still make a legal entity to protect assets, and it probably could be made to work like a marriage somewhat, but rules are a bitch to make that work, NV is anonymous as the N "nameless" part implies which bla bla, conclusion will not work, not even mentioning the minimum cashflow, and minimum sold and paid for shares, €40K minimum, personal responsiblity with BV since they are all flex versions now, could try Ltd. but tax service will be eating out of your ass everyday and you can count on extra risk with that, have to start it up in London and then go to Commerce Chamber to transfer shit, lot of work and money and it would not serve its purpose well or at all. Forget fancy stuff and weird shenanigans, just a few contracts and done.
 
I would not know about over there, but I know for the Benelux (and Sweden has something exactly if not very close to it) they have something called a "samenlevingscontract", which literally means "living together contract". It can contain what you want, as much as you want making it like a marriage and more (quite similar anyway), or as little as you want. You cannot just draw one up yourself, it has to be done with lawyers and through a notary, who has to have it on file, if not most judges will declare it invalid when it comes to issues with taxes or government (inheritance, paternity, estates and taxes, etc). In Sweden the term is exactly the same, they call it "sambo" for short (forgot the long word for it), forgot the details for a sambo though but it was quite similar to the Benelux.

A marriage you could import, like from Morocco or Turkey for example (99% of marriages with multiple wives were just that), could be between many wives and a man, as long as you say "religion, racism!" and they just accepted it. And then the government caught on, a dude with 4 wives in 4 homes on welfare as he had a gf in his own house, nope. So now a marriage is strictly between 2 people. So polygamists use the samenlevingscontract but just have a lot more people sign it. And because such a contract can contain exactly what a registered partnership entails (save for a few details) there you go.
Important to note that a registered partnership is a marriage where you do not have to say yes but still have to bring witnesses, and where you do not automatically were the daddy like in marriage, and they changed that to always the daddy in 2014 anyway. There are a few more things, like in case of divorce and then death in marriage all your stuff goes to your ex, the end, which does not fly in registered partnerships. All in all the differences are minor, and it takes 2 minutes and 2 signatures and saying yes to each other and you are now husband and wife instead of partners, the differences are that minor.

You can still make a legal entity to protect assets, and it probably could be made to work like a marriage somewhat, but rules are a bitch to make that work, NV is anonymous as the N "nameless" part implies which bla bla, conclusion will not work, not even mentioning the minimum cashflow, and minimum sold and paid for shares, €40K minimum, personal responsiblity with BV since they are all flex versions now, could try Ltd. but tax service will be eating out of your ass everyday and you can count on extra risk with that, have to start it up in London and then go to Commerce Chamber to transfer shit, lot of work and money and it would not serve its purpose well or at all. Forget fancy stuff and weird shenanigans, just a few contracts and done.
Yes! That was exactly what she was talking about.

:sadface: That was exactly what she was talking about.
 
Bit of an update on my dumbass friend:

So, apparently he's been making plans to slam a chick in the town where I live that he moved from a few years back. Barring the fact that he's broke as shit with a garbage car, a legitimately crazy wife, and that he ain't ever coming back this way ever again, this chick has... issues...

She's an old friend of one of my former roommates that went to prison for non-fatally stabbing her parents when the parents were having a three way with this chick's prior best friend. Also she's a straight up single mom (child adopted from her sister because her womb is deserted), a serious alcoholic, and has been mixed up with meth. A bunch of times. Probably why her womb is deserted.

This dude is going to get his balls set on fire. Like, the whole situation is just a setup for catastrophic failure when it bottoms out and it's going to cause so much goddamn pain. Our relationship has already begun deteriorating because he doesn't make time for anything that doesn't have a vagina. Nigga's, like, 33 so I'm near positive it's a mid-life crisis, but the way it's going to finalize it's more likely going to be an end-of-life crisis.
 
33 is only mid-life if you intend to die early. It sounds like he qualifies.
 
It's almost like he's become embroiled in this disgusting sex-cult and I want to scream in his face and be like "stop this now, you're going to irrevocably damage everyone involved in this shit" but I don't think there's any way I can deprogram his dumb ass. He's not smart enough or mature enough to participate in a functional polyamorous relationship, if there even is such a thing (:optimistic:).

He's using the prospect of meaningless sex to fill an emptiness inside himself; You can't fill a stomach with junk food, it'll just make you sick.
 
Sometimes the best and most merciful thing you can do is just let the fire burn itself out and not get involved
33 is only mid-life if you intend to die early. It sounds like he qualifies.
That's the thing with people that fall into shit like this, they're too mentally and emotionally immature to deal with the fact that their days of being young, dumb and full of cum are going to come to an end some day, so they'd rather be the fire that burns twice as bright but only half as long so they can go out believing they were sex deities in their time. That's a mindset this guy and others like him should've grown out of more than a decade ago if it weren't for the fact they haven't gotten it into their heads that they can't have their cake and eat it too
 
Sometimes the best and most merciful thing you can do is just let the fire burn itself out and not get involved

That's the thing with people that fall into shit like this, they're too mentally and emotionally immature to deal with the fact that their days of being young, dumb and full of cum are going to come to an end some day, so they'd rather be the fire that burns twice as bright but only half as long so they can go out believing they were sex deities in their time. That's a mindset this guy and others like him should've grown out of more than a decade ago if it weren't for the fact they haven't gotten it into their heads that they can't have their cake and eat it too
*crack
*sip

Yeah, still got the moves, he thinks as he goes after fruit so low as to be below his knees
 
*crack
*sip

Yeah, still got the moves, he thinks as he goes after fruit so low as to be below his knees
That's usually how guys like him work, going for quantity over quality, so they go after the homely stort of women who will agree to fuck within the first few dates since they've been starved of any semblance of love and affection of any kind and are willing to take whatever they can get. This of course leads to them becoming heartbroken and jaded as soon as the guy disappears from her life as he goes out to find another sorry sap of a woman to scrub, rinse and repeat with.

This shit and Polyamory in general is the ultimate consequence of hammering it into the heads of adult mental/emotional children that sex is a numbers game when it doesn't really need to be, thusly also leading to shit like incel culture being a thing
 
What is there to ask about? The basics are right there. It's terse, but informative.
bruh

this girl allegedly tried to murder her own parents because of their three-way with their own daughter's former best friend. Is that shit just a normal friday afternoon for you?
 
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