Punished Duckman - they won't stop squacking

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the khat quaffer

so close, yet so far away
kiwifarms.net
Joined
May 27, 2019
A few weeks ago a bunch of baby ducks washed up outside my hovel. My imbecile retarded cousin killed one of them. There was a storm...I didn't know what to do and I didn't know to how to eat them so I let them be and hoped nature would fix itself.

It is now Dec. 25th (Benjamin Franklin's birthday) and I have been hearing ducks quack nonstop in the distance for days. I have never heard ducks quack in these parts.

Am I cursed? How do I make pennance to the ducks?

Merry Christmas. PS, serious question. they're quacking now.
 
Uh they're probably quacking for their parents, right? If they're dead or lost, not much you can do. I asked Gemini:
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A few weeks ago a bunch of baby ducks washed up outside my hovel. My imbecile retarded cousin killed one of them.
There's a simple test to determine whether or not someone is evil: would they brake when seeing a duck (or ducks) crossing the road in front of them. Most humans would. A psychopath wouldn't, and only a truly evil piece of shit would deliberately run over said duck(s).

Your cousin sounds like a wrong'un.
 
There's a simple test to determine whether or not someone is evil: would they brake when seeing a duck (or ducks) crossing the road in front of them. Most humans would. A psychopath wouldn't, and only a truly evil piece of shit would deliberately run over said duck(s).

Your cousin sounds like a wrong'un.
He's kind of retarded. Not medically so. Just really really ...really stupid. I'd kill him but he's family.

Is there a Futurama Poppers situation I can do?
 
They're most likely just cold if they're still baby ducklings. Do they have anything to keep them warm?

If they don't, get a light on them, even if it's just a normal lightbulb (not LED bulbs, filament), and set it close so they can use it to warm up.

I mostly raise chickens, but it's generally the same. My chicks would only get really loud if they were hungry, lonely, or cold. I assume you've gotten the ducklings food and water, and they've all got each other, so make sure they're warm.
 
I only know from what we'd do to get rid of birds when they'd build a nest in our mailbox. You gotta find an avian conservationist to collect them and relocate them/raise them to adulthood. A veterinarian can probably get you in touch with one. In most places it's actually illegal to fuck with them yourself, so don't mention your cousin murdering one.
 
You need to become a duck and leave your human life behind you forever to appease the quack spirits.
 
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