Quinton Reviews / Quinton Kyle Hoover / Q_Review / OttselSpy24 / OttselSpy25 - I KNOW WE HIT THE LIMIT FOR ME TO DO THEM, BUT THOSE THINGS TAKE TIME, NOW SHUT UP AND LET ME TALK ABOUT GARFIELD AND MCDONALDS, WHILE MOCKING OTHER YOUTUBERS!!

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Is Quinton able to redeem himself?

  • YASS QUEEN SLAY

    Votes: 273 13.4%

  • Not without Caleb

    Votes: 287 14.1%

  • Only inside a bouncy castle

    Votes: 801 39.3%

  • After his love quest is over

    Votes: 648 31.8%

  • With the love of a true and honest whaman

    Votes: 567 27.8%
  • Total voters
    2,036
Wow Quinton asking questions that were only asked...1900 years ago when early Christian theologians had to begin developing ideas of the Trinity, 1400 years ago when they had to debate with new Muslim conquerors, and so on and so forth.

What next, is he going to ask how Judeo-Christianity is monotheistic when the book of Job begins with a heavenly court? Or how God can exist along with other gods in the Old Testament? Or why one of God's names (Elohim) is a plural of El—the main Canaanite god which sat at the head of a pantheon? Or why there are references to the "sons of God" in the Hebrew Bible?

Having a bad clergyman who can't explain basic Christian theology or, more likely, doesn't feel it necessary to explain it to a 4 year old chubster covered with cheeto dust doesn't mean you're some fedora'd expert atheist.
 
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Woke Blue Muttlema said:
Not much is known about the exact timeframe he started. Hell, there is not even a true consensus on when he really became a lolcow.

The earliest mentions of breadtubers were on Twitter in early 2018 if my memory does not fail me, which combined with his jihad against EFAP showed his true colors to a lot of people.

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Imagine that one of your biggest reply guys is your own older sister.

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Why are they still attempting to 'debate' the Christians to 'own' them? These people are going to be in their seventies, if they make it that long, and still be sperging about how daddy dared try to INDOCTRINATE them into the eeeeevil word of the Bible when they were six.
 
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Toolbox said:
Why are they still attempting to 'debate' the Christians to 'own' them? These people are going to be in their seventies, if they make it that long, and still be sperging about how daddy dared try to INDOCTRINATE them into the eeeeevil word of the Bible when they were six.
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The funny thing about that is that according to Quinton he got his views from his father, which means that either he did not have true convictions or is full of shit.
 
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Tathagata said:
Wow Quinton asking questions that were only asked...1900 years ago when early Christian theologians had to begin developing ideas of the Trinity, 1400 years ago when they had to debate with new Muslim conquerors, and so on and so forth.

What next, is he going to ask how Judeo-Christianity is monotheistic when the book of Job begins with a heavenly court? Or how God can exist along with other gods in the Old Testament? Or why one of God's names (Elohim) is a plural of El—the main Canaanite god which sat at the head of a pantheon? Or why there are references to the "sons of God" in the Hebrew Bible?

Having a bad clergyman who can't explain basic Christian theology or, more likely, doesn't feel it necessary to explain it to a 4 year old chubster covered with cheeto dust doesn't mean you're some fedora'd expert atheist.
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yes, the idea that the different parts of the Trinity were there own dieties is one of the first ever encountered by Christianity.
The way they resolved it was 200 years of intense theological debate among some of the greatest minds of the west climaxing in Santa Claus (yeah quinton the one from rankin bass cartoons) socking Arius. It is a debate that in some ways continues with Miaphysite christians.
Christians then had to explain and defend this doctrine as europe conquered the world to hundreds of different peoples and cultures.

Like yeah dude you don’t want to be Christian whatever that’s fine, but to larp like it’s some intellectually vacuous wizard of Oz tier scam to the point a child can ask questions which have never been considered is indicative about how ignorant quinton is about the religion he is desperately trying to dunk on.

This of course is coming from the same guy who flees to his safe space discord therapy server the second he gets challenged or questioned on anything that makes him uncomfortable. If early Christians were more like quinton we would be speaking arabic or still worshipping trees or something rn.

Anyway...
He keeps teasing this Carly vid, He claims it’s gonna be like 6 hours but I doubt it, his laziness will always trump anything else in the end. I expect a 2 hour vid max. It is interesting he claims to have a calculated plan to get to 600k, it shows again that he learned all the wrong lessons from his fallen titan stuff. He constantly talks about how he knows about what levers to pull to get attention but doesn’t so he can “do what he actually enjoys” (guess that’s out the window again btw). It will be interesting to see if he does his 1000 iq plan and doesn’t go viral if it will shatter his understanding of youtube or he will have a principal skinner moment and blame something else.
 
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DogZero said:
He constantly talks about how he knows about what levers to pull to get attention but doesn’t so he can “do what he actually enjoys” (guess that’s out the window again btw).
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Can we just talk about how sad the whole "Uhh, yeah, I could totally be a bigger and better Pewdiepie if I REALLY tried, but I'd rather just have fun" mindset really is? I know it's a common thing among autists to believe that if you just push the right buttons you can expect the right results, but Quinton has been around youtube long enough that you'd expect this brilliant scholar to know his own limits.

He's not currently stagnated just because he keeps getting into drama with bigger e-celebs, if anything that kind of stunt usually helps a channel become more popular. He's stuck because he lacks the charisma to captivate an audience (he seems more interested in just having an echo chamber of ass-kissers he can retreat to when real life gets too scary anyway), the interpersonal skills to do any kind of networking, and, simply put, because his personality is about as interesting as watching paint dry. Even when he puts in his best efforts (and you can tell there are some videos where he actually really tries, regardless of what he says afterwards) his videos are just good for background noise, never really something you want to dedicate your attention to.
Not to mention the whole "I'd just rather do whatever I want to, man" just sounds hypocritical coming from a desperate trend-chaser who's so obsessed with his own metrics.
 
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Woke Blue Muttlema said:
Not much is known about the exact timeframe he started. Hell, there is not even a true consensus on when he really became a lolcow.

The earliest mentions of breadtubers were on Twitter in early 2018 if my memory does not fail me, which combined with his jihad against EFAP showed his true colors to a lot of people.

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Imagine that one of your biggest reply guys is your own older sister.

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lol what a gay
 
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and if we actually believed your lie Quinton, we’d counterpoint that argument by asking “Someone would willingly have sex with you, and you’d go on social media to tweet about it?”

”That poor woman.”
 
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There's only one god in christianity, the holy trinity isn't fucking "three gods" and how quinton is so high off his own ass fumes to ignore what the holy trinity even fucking means as a concept for potential twitter likes is levels of hilariously pathetic I didn't even think someone like him would stoop to.
 
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Prepare for something I have not done in a while. A breakdown.

Let us commence with a schedule:
Plans 2021.png

Four months after and we only have one of these videos done and to boot it got him a lot of flack.

Requiem For a Themed McDonald's
- Quinton's main reason is a personal attachment towards a defunct log cabin-themed location in South Carolina he visited with his grandpa.
- There is one in Michigan and he really wants to see it, so you might want to give him a dollar or two... no pressure.
- The McDonald's Historian saga has begun. This is testing the waters kind of video idea.
- Quinton gets on a tangent about SUE the T-Rex. Doesn't really fit the rest of the story except for the connection to McDonald's Charity and being a dinosaur.

iBinged iCarly
- Quinton literally just fucking describes episodes in non-emission order to create a retrospective on the show. I will admit, I did only really read it halfway through because I have better shit to do. Does he really think he can do this for 6 hours? Is not even Ls Mark's Simpsons level of to the point, is just him giving a Wikipedia-level intro into an episode.
- The 30 pages are just Season One.

Animeme | Fallen Titans
- Quinton, uncharacteristically, extends Animeme the courtesy of not just blandly mocking them because he has acquaintances inside he wants to maintain (Izzy, Brock Baker, maybe Zach).
- Quinto compares Yo Mama to Family Guy Compilations.
- Someone is definitely editing this video for Qumbler.
- Qooper references Shane Dawson as "a pasty guy who fucked a cat" in a throwaway joke.
- Qoomer is just fucking describing Animeme Rap Battles.
- He truly is the best commentator for such a mundane and needlessly niche topic.

Q's bf made a rap about our lord and savior, Johnmas. He sadly scrapped the lyrics leaked months ago where he offhand mentions SOTY.

Some retard went into the subreddit to poke the beehive directly about "Quinton Hate"

Q received a response for his Chills video by a fan.


The first video (an unboxing for Animorphs and McDonald's)
A very old video, you can tell because his hair still has some curls, and a lot of mainstays on his collection appear here. He even mentions this video was recorded on inauguration day. The video is being recorded by his dad (probably his main photographer) in case you want to hear his voice.
1:26. Someone on Reddit asked if I wanted Garfield plushies and I said "YEEEESSS".
2:08. The justification why he got the idea of touring weird McDonalds is a tweet with 41 likes.
5:00. Someone on Reddit sold his Animorphs books so Quinton could review them.
6:36. While noticing a letter. "Oh... I was expecting a loving fan letter... instead is a note about what it is and what isn't canon".
7:20. "I found my audience really appreciates the boomer references you keep sneaking into my WOOORK".

The second video (iCarly preview)
He literally sounds like valley girl Pregory with StrangeAeons mannerisms.
1:05. Quinton admits he didn't really watch a lot of History Channel for his video.
2:01. " my vision is not only that I'm going rewatch the whole show but that I'm going to re-structure my life around watching this show".
2:15. Quinton watched a single episode per day to match his quota.
2:42. When it's over "I want my body to go through an intense withdrawal. I want to have an anxiety attack because I ran out of iCarly AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE ANYMORE".
3:10. "I don't know if you know this BOUT ME. BUT I AM A FAT PIECE OF SHIT."
- He talks about his weight journey. How back in 2018 he actually looked his age and how he got pretty suicidal after bouncing back. He obviously doesn't mention why but I think it's pretty obvious.
- He also mentions he stopped walking outside because "he stopped having safe spaces". A theory but I think he just is very scared of getting doxed unless there is a literal troll cult in Versailles stalking him for real he has not mentioned it at all.
- This whole thing is planned so he can monetize himself getting in shape. He thinks he can convince himself to work out and diet through the power of shitposting.
7:54. The Shattering Lack of Common Sense or My Willpower is Not Enough?

The third video
Just a 360° tour of Hollywood Mcdonald's.
 
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