Containment Random Chris Updates

[Xanax]

Someone please explain what emotion Chris is trying to convey when he makes his voice high mid sentence for no reason. I know he's done it forever, but seems more often lately...is that how he thinks girls talk?

Actually curious.

Yeah, pretty much. It doesn't help that Chris has been enjoying Neptunia, a Japanese game series about little girls, which means the voices are probably ear-splittingly high. He's probably trying to replicate that because he thinks it's cute. The weird thing is, with some professional voice training, Chris could easily put on a passable female voice because there's absolutely no bass in his voice, he genuinely sounds as if his testicles never descended. It's probably the only thing Chris has going for him gender-wise.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Chris is Barbs Idea Guy.

 

[Mason Verger]

As it says at the top, 'we are not an autistic Illuminati'- just a bunch of people with too much time on our hands reading about weirdos on the internet. The authorities have been contacted dozens, hundreds, (thousands?) of times about the Chandlers by internet randos. Maybe they might do something if given the video of Chris hitting Barb (depending on what it looks like) and the people holding onto it are responsible for the decision not to do anything with it but other than that I'm not sure what you would suggest that would help in this situation.

The ride will end eventually, but the only way to steer it seems to be if you make yourself more of a lolcow than chris.

Agreed. The only way to "enjoy" this mess is to be an observer. You start tipping the scales in one direction or the other then whatever happens in the end is partly on you.

Just look at the harm people have done to Chris just by giving money. Or innocently telling about fictional comic book dimensions. At this point there's no telling what ripple will be the one that sinks the boat.

 

[AnOminous]

If we think something like actual elder abuse is going on, someone ought to come up with a strategy of how we should handle this.

Like we handle everything else.

By laughing at it.

 

[fiu0cm]

Chris is upset that people are cyber bullying him on his Amazon wish list:

But then figured out how to make his wish list "unable to disappear" (you can still mark most items as purchased, but they'll stay on the current list) and added more Amiibos to the list. I can't tell if gife is a misspelling of give or gift:

 

[Mason Verger]

Chris is upset that people are cyber bullying him on his Amazon wish list:
View attachment 608718

But then figured out how to make his wish list "unable to disappear" (you can still mark most items as purchased, but they'll stay on the current list) and added more Amiibos to the list. I can't tell if gife is a misspelling of give or gift:
View attachment 608723

I like how careful he was in trying to word it without saying "meMeME!" every other sentence.

Also, you should wish for a fucking car you dipshit.

 

[Marvin]

But does he understand it??? Or is he blindly going along with whatever anyone says about his mother online, does he understand why people say what they say about Barb? Yes, she's a shitty, greedy, egotistical asshole (and the majority of that has spread directly to Chris), but sometimes the shit Chris says to her is fucked.

Chris isn't acting the way he does towards Barb because of what the internet is saying.

Chris acts the way he does towards Barb because the static balance of their relationship has changed. They've always pushed back against each other as hard as they could. Barb did it because she's a shitty parent .Chris did it because he's a selfish manchild.

In the past, Barb has always been more effective at scaring Chris into shutting up, so the balance was in her favor. She's slowly gotten more quiet and Chris has expanded into the gap.

He's not very cognizant of what's going on. He's gradually a lot more dominant in the house and he's not really noticing it. Heh, if she snapped at him tomorrow, he'd jump right back to cowering in fear as if he was 10 years old again.

Anyway, it's a stretch to claim the things Chris says to Barb are fucked. The stuff she's said to him for the first 30 years of his life was fucked. It's not like he's threatening to toss her out in the snow if she doesn't behave. He's just being snippy to her at worst.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

I feel like slapping Chris and telling him Wishlists are only for real women selling pussy.

 

[Mason Verger]

I feel like slapping Chris and telling him Wishlists are only for real women selling pussy.

For shits and giggles I started counting how many items were on his list but I stopped at around 60 because my fucking thumb got tired from scrolling..

 

[Done]

If anyone deserves his shitty behavior, it's the one person most responsible for teaching him how to act that way.

I think the tale of Barb getting a taste of her son's pimp hand needs to be a cautionary tale in every autist parenting book.

I feel like slapping Chris and telling him Wishlists are only for real women selling pussy.

Someone should buy Chris a cheap amiibo and then call the IRS on him. #AutistAudit

 

[fiu0cm]

For shits and giggles I started counting how many items were on his list but I stopped at around 60 because my fucking thumb got tired from scrolling..

You were over halfway there. There are 95 items, the total cost is at least 4949.57USD, and the average sans unknown values is 64.28USD.

Amended to include pricing from things not listed in the wish list:

 

[Mason Verger]

You were over halfway there. There are 95 items, the total cost is at least 4949.57USD, and the average sans unknown values is 64.28USD.
View attachment 608804

That's the combined Christmas gift budget of ten orphanages. Good ones too, white kid orphanages.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

That's the combined Christmas gift budget of ten orphanages. Good ones too, white kid orphanages.

Ones that are 10 more times likely to reproduce and hold a steady job.

 

[Done]

For shits and giggles I started counting how many items were on his list but I stopped at around 60 because my fucking thumb got tired from scrolling..

Chris's wishlist is why Logitech makes infinity-scroll mice.

 

[BigTubboWithLittleChina]

That's the combined Christmas gift budget of ten orphanages. Good ones too, white kid orphanages.

Think of how many CWCville soup hotels could use that sort of gift budget, Chris, you unfeeling bastard

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Chris isn't acting the way he does towards Barb because of what the internet is saying.

Chris acts the way he does towards Barb because the static balance of their relationship has changed. They've always pushed back against each other as hard as they could. Barb did it because she's a shitty parent .Chris did it because he's a selfish manchild.

In the past, Barb has always been more effective at scaring Chris into shutting up, so the balance was in her favor. She's slowly gotten more quiet and Chris has expanded into the gap.

He's not very cognizant of what's going on. He's gradually a lot more dominant in the house and he's not really noticing it. Heh, if she snapped at him tomorrow, he'd jump right back to cowering in fear as if he was 10 years old again.

Anyway, it's a stretch to claim the things Chris says to Barb are fucked. The stuff she's said to him for the first 30 years of his life was fucked. It's not like he's threatening to toss her out in the snow if she doesn't behave. He's just being snippy to her at worst.

If I talked to my mom like he did, she would drive the 300 miles to me and whoop my ass.

 

[fiu0cm]

He attached photos of the cats, Lucy and Sylvia.

The picture of Sylvia was likely taken at the same time as the last picture of Sylvia on his head. Unless his hair is just permanently stuck to his forehead.

 

[Guts Gets Some]

I've never wanted to rescue a cat more in my life than right now.

 

[PT 940]

I've never wanted to rescue a cat more in my life than right now.

Someone should go to his house and say they are from the future/merge and announce that he must give them all of his pets because they won't survive the merge if he doesn't surrender them

 

[CoolGuyHitler]

On twitter a father asked people to show support for his daughter who's being bullied for being "ugly".

Edit: I shouldnt shit on him for doing a nice gesture.