Containment Random Chris Updates

[Mr. Manchester]

He's talking about Ribbons. It sounds impressive, but it isn't. You basically get these just by doing not-very-difficult challenges in each game and you can transfer a Pokémon from a previous generation and it will have all the Ribbons still on it.

It's pretty much just a side thing and has no effect on the gameplay, besides giving you more shit to grind out, so naturally, Chris cares deeply about it.

Makes me wonder if all the motherfuckers spending wads of cash on Chris had to do was give him little collectable awards instead. Just every month go buy some default award from Hobby Lobby, glitter the bitch, and send it off with their letter.

"Dear Christine Weston Chandler,

CONGRATULATIONS!

Your original creations and talents have earned you the Mr. Manchester Society Brony Blue Award which is enclosed in this large envelope with no return address! Our society presents these awards to the greatest retard we can find! Please see the catalog below of all the awards you can win and check the online leader board at www.freebullshitwebsite.com"

 

[{o}P II]

Almost 38 years old..

It must be weird being chris where time passes forward but your mental age at best stays at the point of a 13 year old

infact i would say it has decreased in the past few years

 

[Swanky Kong]

That screenshot isn't even from Chris's Pokemon game!

The screenshot has a level 50 Blaziken which is presumably called Blaziken, belonging to a trainer called Nicole. Can't he even take a screenshot from his own game?

That IS a screenshot taken by Chris. You can see his Switch profile icon at the top which matches the profile he added me on. It is definitely weird that he is lying about literally everything else in relation to this Blaziken. Seeing how he has part of a complete dex in the photo, I would not be surprised if he bought a 100% collection somewhere online so he may pass it off as his own.

 

[Argh My Cigar]

I like to think little Chris always believed he was the most awesomest Pokemon Master around until one day he got his ass handed to him by someone who methodically studied the meta-game, of which crushed his ego for an entire 15 minutes before he rationalized that the RNG mystically bestows higher stats to all opposing teams because of his awtism.

 

[jc17]

Cleaning can take a really long time if someone doesn't know how to do it right. There are also two types of clean - the appearance of clean and actually clean. The appearance of clean means stuff might look alright on the surface but if you look too closely it might really be dusty or someone might have just take a bunch of dirty stuff and shoved it into a closet. Actual cleaning takes a bit of time to learn how to do. It means taking everything off of a bookshelf, dusting it and cleaning stuff as you put it back on the shelves. It means getting on your knees and cleaning the whole toilet, not just the inside of the bowl. When Chris made videos to show the progress of cleaning his room a lot of it was just moving stuff around and it did actually look better but I doubt he has any idea of how to really clean anything. That makes me feel very, very bad for him. Not everyone who grew up in a dirty home will learn how to clean properly as an adult so it's doubtful the house will ever be truly clean, even if they threw out a bunch of the junk.

Get some bags, label them "clothes", "garbage", "other" and start sorting.

Once the trash is gone and the laundry is going, sort through the last bag separating what to keep or what to get rid of.

It's not hard.

 

[The American Hedgehog]

 

[The Dude]

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No one cares, Chris.

Other people, employed or unemployed, worry about covering bills, paying the rent, meeting deadlines, heck just whether their life is going anywhere worthwhile in general. Chris gets pissy that he can't grandstand in Pokémon.

But he put a GRAND AMOUNT of TIME and GREAT EFFORT into that birdman pogeymongo! They should have known that he would want to transfer it to the new game! The goddess commands it!

Chris's virtual life and pets are compusivly well kept

Chris's IRL life and pets are neglected and viewed as a unimportant distraction

Taking care of real animals is hard and takes actual effort. It's easier to just push buttons on a video game controller.

Meanwhile people in China were dying of the coronavirus...

Chris doesn't know what or where China is, aside for a childish euphemism for female genitalia.

It must be weird being chris where time passes forward but your mental age at best stays at the point of a 13 year old

infact i would say it has decreased in the past few years

You give Chris far too much credit. At best Chris has the mentality of a 9 year old.

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Enjoy spooning with your octogenarian mother (while you still can, because it won't be long now) and talking to your imaginary spouses, Chris.

Don't know why Chris is shit-talking Garbage Pail Kids when he is a Garbage Pail Kid for all intents and purposes.

 

[Cardboard Box Mountain]

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Oh, don't worry about that, Chrissy. *flashes huge perverted grin and leaves many things unsaid*

I can only imagine the horrible bull moose mating noises that will be coming from Chris's room as he pretends to fuck thin air, e.g., his "loves." Ugh, I feel sick typing that. Barb will have the TV cranked full blast to cover it up.

 

[Cantercoin]

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Who the fuck cares about the garbage pail kids anymore?

 

[Hogar Grupal]

Get some bags, label them "clothes", "garbage", "other" and start sorting.

Once the trash is gone and the laundry is going, sort through the last bag separating what to keep or what to get rid of.

It's not hard.

This is the Chandler's we're talking about. Barb is mental, and Chris is lazy to take out the trash.

Who the fuck cares about the garbage pail kids anymore?

Chris with his outdated references. Unless he's secretly saying that he's the Garbage Pail Kid (which is really a one hell of self-realization for Chris)

 

[A Grey Cat]

Who the fuck cares about the garbage pail kids anymore?

Apparently Chris does, someone must have said something bad about them on a FB group he either lurked on or tried to join. Then again it could reflect just how out of touch Chris is, I'm amazed he didn't try to say anything about people who think d&d is a "devil's game" an argument thats been debunked and dead for years.

 

[RebelRein1488x]

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The hell is up with the “Kra-Kow!” Thing he’s ending with recently?

 

[Tikbalang]

The hell is up with the “Kra-Kow!” Thing he’s ending with recently?

Like most cartoon characters, he needs a catchphrase

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LoveConquersHate does not apply to those he despise

 

[A Grey Cat]

Like most cartoon characters, he needs a catchphrase

LoveConquersHate does not apply to those he despise

I thought his catch phrase was zap to the extreme

 

[Tikbalang]

I thought his catch phrase was zap to the extreme

or True and Honest

 

[Chan Fan]

Like most cartoon characters, he needs a catchphrase

LoveConquersHate does not apply to those he despise

or "I'm workin' on it!"

 

[Alex Krycek]

His catchphrase is “Among Which”, not the Medieval Capital of Poland.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

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How can you be so smug and delusional at the same time. All of Freud's theories proven in one tweet.

 

[BigTubboWithLittleChina]

Stop ruining Peanuts for me, Chris.

 

[Yamcha's Only Fan]

The hell is up with the “Kra-Kow!” Thing he’s ending with recently?

I think its from Cars. That pixar rip off of Doc Hollywood with Larry the Cable Guy.

His catchphrase is “Among Which”, not the Medieval Capital of Poland.

I thought it was 'but I digress' or making spitting sounds like a 4 year old.

And as for the rest of chris's lingo, its a mix of in-jokes that only he understands and total non sequitur. I guess this is what english becomes when you hand it to a hyper-autistic hermit like him. Everything chris says lately has to be decoded like its some kind of exceptional pop-culture cypher. I might be able to forgive his butchery of the english language if he wasn't so damned smug about living in a garbage house with 9 court cases for outstanding debt.