Containment Random Thoughts & Questions

[A-№1]

can you imagine if chris converted to scientology he'd somehow wind up in even deeper debt lol

They'd never let him in. Even scientologists have standards.

Also Chris doesn't have enough money.

Or would his motherfucking behavior even come to light?

His penchant for Honest Content would have revealed all eventually. I was on a break from Christory for a while, so I learned of the incest kind of backwards, but his hints about sexing up an over 50 former accountant just screams Barb.

I also wonder if someone's going to move into the Chandler's residence and will have to deal with the horrors of the previous tenants.

Fortunately we have a thread for that.

Must not have occurred to the Almighty that other people

Chris doesn't believe in other people. They are just minor characters in The Chris Show. It's not like they have their own thoughts independent of Chris.

 

[GypsyBard]

My friend just said something and I had to share it because the idea of it was so funny. He said if Chris didn't go to jail he probably would be scraping together some money too fund and try and sell Sonichu nfts. And just the thought of it was so funny that I had to share it with somebody that would actually get it

 

[Georges St. Pierre]

CWC's voice is EXACTLY like Big Bird's from the 80's.

This is way bigger than I think we realize.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Does Chris show signs of fetal alcohol syndrome?

Borb did like to go out drinking around the time Barb "gave him the birth".

 

[King Kiwi]

Chris doesn't believe in other people.

That's it.

We're the fictional ones to him.

 

[Tits Warrior]

Not hip hop but Daniel Johnston was an autistic musician who enjoyed a cult success. His work was offbeat and poorly produced but had a great charm. He was never found his sweetheart and it featured in his work. He had talent though and never raped anyone. There are a number of parallels to Chris but the main factor in why he wasn't a sexual deviant hoarder is that he wasn't Chris. Chris is just Chris and that is why he is the way he is.

I wouldn't trust the speculations of a burger boiler

Dude, even Wesley Willis was smarter than fucking Chris.

 

[King Kiwi]

Dude, even Wesley Willis was smarter than fucking Chris.

Chris doesn't have to be smart, that's what other people are for.

 

[Pointless Sperg]

Chris doesn't have to be smart, that's what other people are for.

Yup. Chris gets the corner office at Sega (but still sits at home) and his assistant does all the work.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Does Chris still have that hope that one day he'll "return suddenly" to the "temple" at 14BLC?

It could be fading away, as this time is definitely unlike the previous times he went to jail.

 

[737 MAX Stan Account]

I wonder how Chris would have turned out if instead of being born white he was black and instead of being mainly into drawing comics he got into creating rap/hip hop?

"Go, Tupacichu! Rap to the Extreme!"
"I will! Thank you, Nigga!"

 

[RainwaterDrop]

Does Chris still have that hope that one day he'll "return suddenly" to the "temple" at 14BLC?

It could be fading away, as this time is definitely unlike the previous times he went to jail.

It's unlikely Chris will remain inprisoned for some years more. Heilberg is a terrific attorney, his client might not be the best but he's still a mentally handicapped person, it's unlikely they are going to throw the book at him. I'm willing to believe Chris will be out of Jail by September at best. With this in mind, Chris has never spent so much time outside his own house, 14 BC is the only place he associates with his home and with his self-centered worldview it's likely he feels entitled to living in it!

Honestly, if I was in his position I would too squat at my former house. Chris clearly has no problem with violating the Law when he feels entitled to it, this is a personal matter to him and he's shit out of luck otherwise, 14 BC it is until they Chris-proof the place lol!

 

[A-№1]

Does Chris still have that hope that one day he'll "return suddenly" to the "temple" at 14BLC?

I'm sure Chris assumes he'll go straight back to 14BLC. Anything else is too uncomfortable a thought for him to even consider.

 

[Ser Ciappelletto]

Does Chris show signs of fetal alcohol syndrome?

Borb did like to go out drinking around the time Barb "gave him the birth".

He has no septum which is one of the core symptoms of FAS.

 

[A Grey Cat]

The stupidest of audiences may not have the most money, but are the easiest to get money out of.

The masses of bleating consoomereist sheep are so easily amused, and corporate Hollywood knows this. Why bother putting effort into anything when all you got do to milk the overgrown children of the world is make something easy to digest, easy to comprehend and has plenty of the "ohh I members dat" momments of the past, to remind them of when they really children. Safe and warm without a care in the world.

Chris was one of the if not THE biggest and most well known examples of such a consumer but he was far from the last. He may be in jail but Disney has plenty more sheep to sheer.

Still I have to wonder what it's like in the timeline where Chris ISN'T in jail right now, and still on Twitter. No doubt he'd be saying the appearance of the ponies in chip and Dale is further proof that; 1. MLP G5 needs 5 more seasons and that cameo appearance won't be enough to satisfy him, 2. That our reality really is merging with his own little coping fantasy.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Anything else is too uncomfortable a thought for him to even consider.

So if he has the means to go back to 14BLC once he's out of the Jail of Fail, I can "foreknow and foresee" a trespassing charge.

It could be the new October 2011 and December 2014.

He has no septum which is one of the core symptoms of FAS.

Looks like Barb was "mother of the year" back then.

 

[A-№1]

The masses of bleating consoomereist sheep are so easily amused, and corporate Hollywood knows this. Why bother putting effort into anything when all you got do to milk the overgrown children of the world is make something easy to digest, easy to comprehend and has plenty of the "ohh I members dat" momments of the past, to remind them of when they really children. Safe and warm without a care in the world.

The latest dead horse beating of The Matrix bombed, so maybe there's hope for humanity after all.

So if he has the means to go back to 14BLC once he's out of the Jail of Fail, I "foreknow and foresee" a trespassing charge.

The police will be called. He'll be trespassed and removed from the property. He'll only be charged and arrested when he returns to the property again: "This is MY house!"

 

[Pointless Sperg]

The police will be called. He'll be trespassed and removed from the property. He'll only be charged and arrested when he returns to the property again: "This is MY house!"

 

[ToroidalBoat]

It's amazing just how much the Jail of Fail really was because of Chris making failtastic choices.

- Chris could've chosen not to incest Barb.

- But he chose to "heal" Barb, and his bloated ego led him to brag about it online, because of course he did.

- And if he already did incest Barb, he maybe could've avoided jail time by not acting up during the hearing.

But he had to get his toys and act up like a little kid, so now Chris spends his big 4-0 in the Jail of Fail.

 

[Guinan's hats]

Chris is a consoomer

This is basically one of the central arguments of that Chris Chan Andy Warhol book.

 

[A Grey Cat]

The latest dead horse beating of The Matrix bombed, so maybe there's hope for humanity after all.

True but keep in mind matrix is only the matrix, it needed to cram in a dozen or so references and characters from other franchises to make a profit. Look at the "success" of space jam 2.

The consume buy obey minded like Chris are only interested in reboots that go that route. Things may be slow going since Chris can't satisfy the consumer addiction from jail but I can assure you when he gets out, wether it's on 5 months or 5 years all he'll care about is getting to a TV to catch up on everything he missed while he was on the inside.