Containment Random Thoughts & Questions

Does Chris really not have any offline friends that could keep him from this madness?
Marvin's the closest thing he has for a friend that isn't made up. But Chris didn't listen to Marvin's advice in the taint piercing issue,so...
 
Maybe Chris could be a real-life Derek.


Everything would be fine as long as none of the residents' grandkids mentioned Sanic.
 
I hear the cops a comin'
I'm going round the bend
Cause I ain't seen the tan arms since, I don't know when
I'm stuck in Albermarle prison, and time keeps draggin' on
And that Sega keeps a trollin', but I'll never stop

When I was eatin' pizza, my mama told me "son,
go and buy a mini-fridge, and bring it right back home."
But I walked right into Gamestop, just to vandalise
When I see those bright blue arms, I hang my head and cry

I bet there's male jerks eating in a fancy dining car
They're probably drinkin' coffee and drawing more blue arms
Well I know I had it coming, I know I can't be free
But that Sonic keeps a Boomin'
And that's what tortures me
 
Last edited:
If Chris really bathes every day like s/he claims, there's a chance the disgusting hair is actually a result of overwashing. Your scalp can overcompensate and flood your hair with oil, so long hair ends up dessicated and frizzy at the ends with a cap of grease on your scalp, just like Chris.

Although that's probably expecting a bit too much of OPL.
 
Speaking of upcoming deadlines:

The ursine deity promised Chris would have a daughter in 2015, however in order to have a daughter born in time, he only has got till April the 9th, which is exactly 99 days from now. Otherwise she would be born after December 31... or your know, not be born ever (which is more likely).
 
Last edited:
If Chris really bathes every day like s/he claims, there's a chance the disgusting hair is actually a result of overwashing. Your scalp can overcompensate and flood your hair with oil, so long hair ends up dessicated and frizzy at the ends with a cap of grease on your scalp, just like Chris.

Although that's probably expecting a bit too much of OPL.

It's actually fairly likely, I think. Chris seems to enjoy over-indulging in things he believes to be feminine (just look at that make-up video where he slathers it on like he's painting a wall). He's probably seen NEW ULTRA-FRAGRANT MADE FOR WOMEN BEAUTY SHAMPOO and uses like half a bottle every day.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Stud2Stud
Speaking of upcoming deadlines:

The ursine deity promised Chris would have a daughter in 2015, however in order to have a daughter born in time, he only has got till April the 9th, which is exactly 99 days from now. Otherwise she would be born after the December 31... or your know, not be born ever (which is more likely).

I am not sure the normal rules of gestation apply to that man's seed.
 
Speaking of upcoming deadlines:

The ursine deity promised Chris would have a daughter in 2015, however in order to have a daughter born in time, he only has got till April the 9th, which is exactly 99 days from now. Otherwise she would be born after December 31... or your know, not be born ever (which is more likely).
I've actually thought about that fairly recently; I had always assumed that the 2015 date in the comics was just a random, far-off point in time that Chris had chosen, but ever since the sperm bank/surrogate stuff, I'm wondering if he had another one of his supposedly prophetic dreams at some point.
 
  • Informative
Reactions: redcent
I've actually thought about that fairly recently; I had always assumed that the 2015 date in the comics was just a random, far-off point in time that Chris had chosen, but ever since the sperm bank/surrogate stuff, I'm wondering if he had another one of his supposedly prophetic dreams at some point.
Even if it originally was a 'random, far-off point in time', to Chris it is a distinct deadline. If I'm not mistaken, 2015 is also the year Bob was supposed to die according to one of Chris prophetic dreams and Chris was angry the reaper lied to him.
The closer the 'deadline' gets, the more solid and distinct it gets as it shows that Chris didn't achieve what was foretold.
 
Has anyone noticed how much... worse Chris sounds in the videos he posted this year? He seems to have a much harder time getting his words out than he used to and sounds a lot more emotionally unstable. Could this be due to his isolation?
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Honeyrabbit
Has anyone noticed how much... worse Chris sounds in the videos he posted this year? He seems to have a much harder time getting his words out than he used to and sounds a lot more emotionally unstable. Could this be due to his isolation?
That's the most likely explanation. Unfortunately, because Chris is a walking disaster, it's better for everyone if he just stayed in his room, so I doubt he'll improve.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Drawets Rednaxela
As has been mentioned earlier, if Chris is indeed charged with a felony, then he will likely lose his tugboat, and (somehow) become even less employable. While this is bad enough given that Chris is who he is, this means that an already fragile financial situation is about to become even more strained, and may even collapse if things get bad enough. With that being said, just as a question, do any of you think that those of us who've grown to follow Chris (sometimes religiously) over the years would be willing to support him through donations, just to keep The Chris-chan variety hour going. Thoughts?
 
just to keep The Chris-chan variety hour going. Thoughts?
Like I said in the chat already, I think viewing Chris as our prank monkey we can 'buy' to produce us content is problematic. Chris is one of those people who'll not only spend everything that they get into frivolities, he's also the kind whose hunger grows after being given free stuff once, so he'll think that the gravy train is going to be permanent, which would encourage him to increase spending and like seen with the car purchase, end up in debt. I don't want to see Chris end up completely homeless, so things like the January 2014 House Fire fund came from a good place, and they did a lot of good for Chris, but the idea of the CWCki community to become his source of income? Nawt a thing to encourage, imo.
(somehow) become even less employable.
Yeah, he was never really employable because any prospective employer would've had to basically drag him kicking and screaming into working life but the 'arrangement' of Chris producing art to generate minor income on the side of his tugboat was working fine: Chris was given incentive to put an effort to gain his money, and his fans got both mementos and the feelgood for donating to this beggar's pity fund. If Chris needed more money, he'd have to work harder or show some more creativity, which was also good incentive for him to plan out his money usage a little.
 
Last edited:
Like I said in the chat already, I think viewing Chris as our prank monkey we can 'buy' to produce us content is problematic. Chris is one of those people who'll not only spend everything that they get into frivolities, he's also the kind whose hunger grows after being given free stuff once, so he'll think that the gravy train is going to be permanent, which would encourage him to increase spending and like seen with the car purchase, end up in debt. I don't want to see Chris end up completely homeless, so things like the January 2014 House Fire fund came from a good place, and they did a lot of good for Chris, but the idea of the CWCki community to become his source of income? Nawt a thing to encourage, imo.
Not to encourage it, per se, but rather just to allow him to keep being Chris, for better or for worse. After all, given his track record, is there any real hope of him wising up any time in the next decade, let alone year? It's hard to see how donations would be different from any other help

...If Chris needed more money, he'd have to work harder or show some more creativity, which was also good incentive for him to plan out his money usage a little.
Not for nothing, the only requirement with this arrangement would be that he be himself and not stay hidden. Surely even he could do that for the folks who would be sponsoring him exclusively?
 
  • Disagree
Reactions: Coldgrip
Not to encourage it, per se, but rather just to allow him to keep being Chris, for better or for worse. After all, given his track record, is there any real hope of him wising up any time in the next decade, let alone year? It's hard to see how donations would be different from any other help
Chris is always going to be Chris, if anything, the last week has proven that fact. I'm just wondering why Chris money troubles should be our issue to solve. Or rather: nothing we would ever do would solve his problem. If a generous soul would donate 500 bucks each month unconditionally for the rest of Chris' life guess what would happen?
He'd spend 700 bucks a month more on frivolities than before and demand 1k for his mothers cavities or whatever.
Simply throwing money at Chris will not solve any of his problems. Not even his money problems.
 
Back