random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Johnny Clyde Cash]

Bringing some gold over from the Matthew Harris thread.

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I was not expecting a rant on K-Pop in this manifesto.

 

[Fetish Roulette]

I'd advise you to spend the time you had blocked out for babyfur gayops learning how to spell.

My own, but I realized after typing it out how cursed it was.

 

[ColtWalker1847]

A WEAPON TO SURPASS BALL PIT

Imagine a Redditor. Now age that Redditor down about 10-15 years. That's an Imgurian.

 

[Law]

Asian music sounds like someone setting a table for half an hour and then leaving while the house burns down.

This thread is going to be a random text goldmine.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Do you think this LOLsuit gives you power over me?

Bro, have you SEEN how much Reddit karma they have?

At least I thought it was funny when I was redditor (my retardation has subsided slightly since then).

Eowyn is hot and I would snuggle with her.

Confiscate all their funko pops and dragon dildos, and set fire to them in a latter-day Bonfire of the Vanities.

Break out the hockey sticks and fire up Kraft Dinner. The Canadians come for the cheese.

Sounds like you need to get laid.

Current Year is so strange.

 

[SCSI]

Monarchy is gay and I would not have sex with it.

Like a mighty pokemon this means your Autism has now evolved into full Retardation.

I usually just sigh, drop my pants, and after they marvel for a moment at the pendulous apparatus they ask me to leave and not come back.

Spam is the tits. On the 20th anniversary of 9/11, I ate an entire can of it to spite Muhammad (Piss Be Upon Him).

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

What happened to that dork who was doing his best Algus from Final Fantasy Tactics impression in this thread?

You cry, the world honks.

 

[Law]

Regardless, you, the solar system, the Kuyper belt, the galaxy, the local cluster, and the stellar neighborhood fucking knows them feetz and toes be STANKIN something WACKY.

 

[DumbDude42]

I once dated a woman over a foot taller than me. Every time she bent over to kiss me, all I could think about were those wildlife videos of birds puking worms down their babies' throats. BLURRGGHHH

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Well I guess my dream of Ian tracking down /k/'s Hotaru Maniac and paying him big bucks to write drug-fueled stream-of-consciousness rants about raping Bosnian women in the 1990s is toast.

I can't recall a single situation where someone has called any organization, said anything like this, and gotten a reaction that wasn't instantly being arrested.

How retarded do you have to be?

Remember kids, it's not bookburning if the book doesn't exist yet. And it's double-not bookburning if the book doesn't have a tranny in it.

Does anyone even listen to bomb threats anymore? I think our courthouse lets them go to voicemail.

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

@WolfeTone

 

[Iron Hamster]

Generally if someone shows you their KF thread on the first date? Yeah, I'd say that's a bit of a red flag...

 

[GHTD]

BOMB THE AIRPORT AT THE GATE.

 

[Putin Bot]

From Matthew C. Harris's infinite words of wisdom:

Don't eat falafel NIGGER. NIGGER don't eat falafel. So when you blow up times square don't yell "falafel burger" NIGGER stop dressing like a falafel burger.

My new political movement is openly anti-latino. We are proud of our ancestory and don't wish to share it with tomahawks nachochuckers and featherheads. Put those tamales into a singular plural form you stupid beaner.

The ATROCITY that is the Asian male with a white female should make all people vomit instantly and gather their pitchforks because it's offensive to god.

 

[Cats]

 

[Useful_Mistake]

The United States Government has clearly stated several times that the bodies were nothing more than scorched mannequins.

 

[Anne Hyroe]

Being an expert at being mad on the Internet is not exactly something to be proud of.

She's like a crazy boomerang

 

[Useful_Mistake]

you're thinking of age in the wrong direction

 

[Meat Target]

Voted 4th hottest mom at her Pentecostal church. Probably.

 

[The Great Citracett]