random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Inco G. Nito]

I know it's hard to accept but 2007 was 36 years ago, many are just in denial to the passage of time.

 

[Smashed & Slamed]

He is the Peter Dinklage of mental midgets.

 

[IamnottheNSA]

where the hell do i even find a brain speedometor?

 

[S.C.U.D.]

pls don't make me look at tranny penis

The transphobia I'm desensitized to. Even seeing my dead name, I have to look at it on my mail, on my bank accounts, and as much as I want to change it, I feel that it's too risky right now.

But saying that I'm afraid of the rain? That really offended me.

I once fell into a creek while out communing with nature. Is that druid enough for you?

 

[Oliver Onions]

Minor but disgusting correction: wrong hole

 

[neger psykolog]

It's actually built into the code. Whenever you post a picture XenForo scans your hard drive to see if you've been looking at gay porn. If you have, it automatically assumes you want full size images. There's no way around it.

 

[Tablet County]

‘As I left the story carpet, in disgrace, and took my coat from the paw patrol themed peg in the cloakroom for a dignified exit, slowly, I began to hate them.’

"We got the best wood, the most solid wood for our homes. The other guys say 'Mr. Tomlinson, you can't throw stones you're in a glass house!' I say we got wood like you wouldn't believe. And you can see it in action from prison."

 

[Markass the Worst]

I am the most persecuted game dev in history.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/mark-edward-kern-grummz-debbichan-foxyfighter.188820/post-20962858

 

[Spectate]

Nobody should leave an attractive underage girl alone with him without supervision.

 

[Law]

"I AM THE MOST PERSECUTED GAME DEV IN HISTORY"

 

[Dr. Butt]

This is like complaining that you miss the Mr. T Cereal of your youth, and some Redditor telling you to pick up Baby Shark Cereal because that's what modern kids are eating. But Mr. T Cereal tasted like sweetened corn, and Baby Shark Cereal is Fin-Tastic Fruit Flavor; what would be helpful would be if they recommended other corn-flavored cereals, especially ones that are less sweet for the adult palette.

It's "palate" but still funny.

 

[DickMain]

Link | Archive
DICK-UPS!

Some choice quotes from the @Clavicular thread courtesy of Gaytriots:

Dick ups is something stirling cooper put me onto and this niggas legit, basically you want to get an erection and for beginners, flex your dick as hard as possible so it stands straight up

To progress your dick ups, you can add things like a hand towel and lay them on top of your cock to make it more difficult. I am currently up to 4 hand towels.

I have gained .5 girth in 2 months of doing semi consistent dick ups

conversing with low iq primitive women is insanely difficult for me (an autist)

 

[Random Internet Person]

did.. you forget what website you're on?

 

[Gentlebastard]

To keep it short the Dominican guy called the Cuban guy a Brazilian and it turned from a debate to a fist fight while saying slurs real quick. Funny how slurs and fists can transend the language barrier.

Being racist as a White person in the current day and age takes skill, you see if you get caught doing anything that can be deemed "racist" you lose because the media will then destroy your life.

A large and busy thread is a permanent monument to the retardation and/or glory that is America. A chat that goes away is ephemeral and fleeting, like the idea of Canada.

Good Americans like those in this thread know that God intended posts to be etched forever upon digital marble so that we can be judged for their content upon death.

So in the span of half an hour I got shamed by the office fat and the office skelly. you can’t win.

I believe that America is built up on retardation. From our very founding we were retards, retards who would put their heads down and bash it against a wall until it crumbles. And by the grace of God, we may be able to retard our way to prosperity once again.

My statement wasn't meant to be a for/against thing, just purely neutrally, I enjoyed seeing everyone in this thread (including myself) being really retarded over something so inconsequential for such a long period of time.

I really only have one response to this absolute peak Current Year moment: lol

I apologize for putting that image into your head.

Bro if Pitbull Murder Squads were a thing I'd make like a reddit mod and do it for free.

 

[Click reply to view]

Vore is actually a remarkably broad and variety fetish community.

 

[BrunoMattei]

The Best Parts are Underlined. A collection of rape scenes from novels. I spotted it at a Montgomery Ward and never once since.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/best-fucked-up-books.52217/post-20969771

 

[Dr. Butt]

"Where we're going, we won't need dicks to consent accident."

 

[Towoman]

If words could kill these faggots then my kill count would put Hitler, Zedong, Stalin, Pol Pot, all to shame.
The entirety of the internet would be the biggest execution chamber.

 

[Thé au lait]

A bunch of bemused Vikings experiencing a smelly potato gnome in heat attempting to communicate by chanting the alphabet and grunting “faggot faggot faggot” would be something to behold indeed

 

[Dr. Butt]

RIP but holy shit he was retarded.