random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Spectate]

I think about reading books

How about actually reading books instead of thinking about it you stupid faggot?

 

[everyone has aids]

She'll let you fuck her in the ass for a squadron of F-35s

I would let someone fuck me in the ass for a squadron of F-35s

sheesh ill let you do that for just one F-35

 

[Dr. Butt]

The tragic passing of KingCobraJFS:

Ghost? Nah man, Cobes is a badass demon chilling with Ozzy and a bunch of big titty gothic cobra angels.

It happened one time and it was an accident, we’ve all eaten a roachrito at some point in our lives, who do you think you are, the queen of England or something?

FUCK SICKOS
FUCK TROLLS
FUCK SUICIDE

HAIL SATAN!
HAIL OZZY!

Downtown Casper needs a statue of Cobra and all the local bars should serve Cobra’s Mist. And issue posthumous apologies for banning the late local rockstar.

10 years from now I could see a yearly cobrafest in Casper.

 

[vomitusdeux]

"Do you look at Pokémon differently knowing that the gender is different?"

"I like women... I like looking at women"
NIGGA JUST SAY YOU JERK OFF

Often I have to remind myself that moids are special needs and only see their female relatives and porn so they don't know what random womanlets look like.

 

[Dr. Butt]

What happened in 1488

 

[Thé au lait]

3. And I didn’t go out of boundaries like calling him a faggot (I did call him a nigger before but it was at the beginning of the drama)

 

[CaddestSlown]

NIGGER JEET SCIENCE NIGGER
TOTAL SCIENCE DEATH

RAPE ALL SCIENCE NIGGERS
NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER x67
SPACE IS WATER

sorry but if i don't get my sex robot with artificial womb i'm not picking up what you're putting down with all of this gene science stuff. kys science nigga

Wait, is Stephen Miller basically just the Fatpacks of jews?

 

[Dr. Butt]

You had like a 25% chance of being a Pajeet and god said "That boy's too good for that" and made you literally anything else.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I want to time travel back exactly 80 years and convince Truman to nuke Japan a few more times so that anime never exists and this thread stops getting shitted up with weeb discourse.

Imagine getting a shotacon fic for a birthday present - I'd rather learn that a pet drowned in a tractor trailer.

I had an army of 22 Monarch caterpillars eat all my milkweed, prolapse their anuses, and die.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

You can literally tell somebody "God isn't real" (in a fucking setting where magic and wizards and shit exists)

None, 3D pigs are disgusting, embrace Fictosexual now you filthy humanimal.

 

[often puzzled]

You know the thread is hungry when we've reached the Ramirez vs Watts for best husband debate.

 

[Kirk Van Houten]

HAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THE DISABLED KID CAN’T EAT HAHAHAHAHAHHA

 

[a kiwifarms user]

Eating pork, shellfish and other stuff its permitted under extreme duress and I would argue being stuck in the world of minecraft qualifies as such because of the autism

 

[Gentlebastard]

I'd like to preface this by saying that the odds are good I'm retarded.

If you're not into ass, you're into tits. If you're not into ass or tits, then you're into feet. If you're not into any of those, you're a fucking freak.

The individuals in question weren't *outrageously* large deathfats, but I still overheard them having one of the fattest conversations I've ever personally been privy to.

I actually felt somewhat offended, just on behalf of civilized humanity in general.

Hi I'm waiting in line for the release of the hot summer single 'She Don't Like Nice Guys' and the up and comer 'She Turned Me Down So She Clearly Has AIDS And Does Anal With Old Men'

Apparently this is the polyamory flag. It's extra retarded that it has a little yellow pi on it to represent a circle.

It should be an actual pie, because everyone who participates in "polyamory" is extremely fat.

I want you to know this is your fault, you made me do this, you made me waste this time.

Disability pride flag being there pisses me off, I might be retarded but at least I’m not a fucking faggot

Damn it! It's only a matter of time before patposting goes mainstream aint it? I really dont want to be that hipster "I was maiking fun of the fat faggot with bitch tits"....

Wow that all must be legit and in no way just wild and crazy shit some random fuckin guy named GAY NIGGER RAPIST is saying simply because why not.

It's a club of internet retards all being equally and differently retarded all at once.

Pansexuals are just bisexuals with no standards.

none of this makes sense, whenever he tries to be funny it does psychic damage to me

 

[a kiwifarms user]

I'm drunk all the time I never get violent

I might be retarded

 

[The Lаughing Man]

I can fix her with my cum

 

[a kiwifarms user]

the e621 account is from the late end of my homelessness

 

[Cnidarian]

JESUS CHRIST. I DONT KNOW WHATS WORSE THE CONVERSATION WHEN THE TROLLS ARE OUT OR WHEN YOU FAGGOTS ARE FREE TO TALK ABOUT FUCKING 1980S COMPUTERS111

 

[Dr. Butt]

I'm drunk all the time I never get violent. In fact, I think people should drink more, for a better society.

 

[a kiwifarms user]

Sir, this is a thread for pirates, NOT butt pirates.