random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Hamstirer]

"chimps", is that what we're calling them now? Not very original, but I will go with it.

 

[Gobermental Supervisor]

"—What about mein hobbies? What about mein animal rescue work?"

 

[Lurkey Turkey]

Your honor, he depicted me as the soyjak

 

[vomitusdeux]

Either way long story short :
Black Sperg go stabby stabby on some hwiwimen, then he go Drowny Drowny cuz he doesn't know how to swimmy swimmy,and then he dead and the hwiwimen aren't dead so everything is nicely tied up THE END!

blakpipo iz jus' mo' evolved, and ytpipo still can' seazon dey foo'

Nigger how agile do you expect old women to be it, she's not Dark Souls light rolling away from danger

Between euphemisms like "lunchtime rowdies" and "blunt-smoking subway menace," I'll admit I lost this round of Guess the Race.

I mean, there's a difference between screaming "fuck niggers" and screaming "I want to fuck 13y/o girls"

It has been 5 years since Buck Breaking dropped. This will serve as the new Buck Breaking.

You own a fur suit and look like my avatar don't you..?

if the site doesn't have much data on you it just gives you random ads targeted at the average reddit user, so it's not surprising that it's trying to push ozempic, prep, programming socks and psych meds to you

They make really good butt plugs for rock stars.

They covered me in jam then put me on the holocoaster! As I rushed past I heard them laughing and calling me 'Ze Jam Juden'!

"I'm sorry that I wasn't very good at sex"

How do you expect me to take this document seriously?

View attachment 8834389

Zeal's mom, also known as ''Zeals mom'' on discord chimes in

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

BPD women are like extreme sports, you may break your neck and ruin your life or die like an idiot but it was fun as hell so it was worth it while it lasted.

 

[SNEED.EXE]

Joshua Moon featured in another dream of mine. There was little erotic component this time.

 

[Dante Alighieri]

I just remembered the poop gnome existed

 

[3MMA]

Defy all who claim the sektur is dead.

 

[Tablet County]

Do cucks interchange so easily like that?

"Hey it's your turn to watch in the chair now"?

The Coca plant fears, on an existential level, the capacity of his Portuguese schnoz to inhale the Bolivian marching powder.

 

[Zeftax]

This may be the meanest thing anyone has said about me ever.

Mock? No, nay, never. This thread if anything is but a shrine to my excellence.

a lolcow who's know for, eating burgers (?)

Since you're too much of a dumbfuck to understand, here's a tl;dr:
Let me post furry porn.

 

[Miss Violet Beauregarde]

The character they've trans-headcanoned in this image is canonically an allegory for Satan.

Yes, those famously childlike characteristics of full breasts and wide childbearing hips...

Holy shit there’s actually scars for each nipple.

Congrats you fucking mildly damaged someone's front gate. You will go down in history as one of humanity's greatest freedom fighters.

 

[Tablet County]

Some younger, sheltered autists sound deceptively gay.

 

[Gobermental Supervisor]

Null genuinely sounds like if a woman spoke through a voice AI trained on Vinesauce Vinny

 

[Tablet County]

Big Sean, enjoyer of cheese and oracle of the law, I come to you seeking wisdom.

Same character also canonically loses a religious debate with a bumbling idiot and then gets vaporized by an aryan kid with brain damage.

 

[Clotso Coof]

I expected no less from literal card carrying faggots.

 

[Gentlebastard]

being alone is mutually exclusive with having a train being run on one's ass

You have made an enemy for life and you realize every interaction you have made with this person has been calculated as though they were playing Crusader Kings 2.

The Himalayas are mere anthills when compared to Mount Stupid and the Olympians whom inhabit it.

I feel like prisoners, especially those in American prisons, are ill-equipped to understand Sophoclean Irony.

at least he only killed his child in the commission of a crime. if he had done something truly unthinkable like twitter bully a narcissist sci fi author he would have died in prison screaming on the floor.

Industrial Light & Magic should hire this faggoty cunt for their projection division

It's amazing that after 2,150 pages of this thread, stuff to make your jaw drop still turns up that no one saw coming.

Can you picture being SUCH a fuck up, you have a lawyer who specializes in... you. There's patent lawyers, slip and fall, DUI... and now a Russel Greer lawyer.

I have never read something so Jewish in my whole life and i'm a jew.

Do you rank higher than me on Mossad scale or something?

 

[Nice Stick]

I don't think you should call people that disagree with you"nigger tier retards".

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

I'll suck your cock though, just not in the fast lane on the motorway

which is the harsh answer to a new harsh world. then there's that fuckin oc nigger.

Double standards aside, do not stick your dick in a vacuum cleaner. There are often disagreeable things happening just beyond the tube.

I guess the general wisdom is: don't stick your dick anywhere, anyone whom you do not completely love and trust. I don't love my vacuum cleaner.

 

[not william stenchever]

Even his coolest dragon got it's shit kicked in by some elf in a flying boat.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Um there's only one way the human body could ever work. And there's a lot of misconceptions nowadays because of things like this rotated clothing.

By a guy that's got some schizophrenic obsession with clothing going on.
From this post.

the in the image clothing company

I can't stop going back and thinking about his utterly bizarre conspiracies and ramblings about how rotated clothing causes teeth to fall out and gives you arthritis. Even months after first seeing his shit.