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I love a good mentally ill post.
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archive

women suffer
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archive
 
Sometimes I get these really fucking mean replies from randos and then I check back and the whole account got nuked within like 20 minutes. Sockpuppets I guess?
 
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YES!!! LETS COMMIT FELONIES IN THE NAME OF LUKE SKYWALKER!!!
Getting butfucked by the FCC because you started a pirate radio station to own Drumpf has got to be the silliest call to action I've seen in a minute. Who even listens to the radio anymore?

Anyway. I guess reddit now has AI bullshit built into different subreddits or something. IDK, I use old reddit. Of course, jannies are mad because they can't sweep up the AI
“Reddit answers” constantly breaks our sub rules (archive)
How do we modify or remove “Reddit answers” links at the bottom of posts? If these responses were offered by real users they would be removed because their advice refers to banned resources or subreddits.

It is unacceptable to waste energy moderating a sub to have inappropriate answers attached to posts.
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Some bitching
It recomended a training regimin I don't like. I can't actually explain why it's bad and convince people not to do it, but it just is, okay?
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Ummm... aktually AI doesn't meet our credentialed standards on our subreddit. For some reason our users can't just not use it or whatever.
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Muh wasted electricity
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As with everything reddit roles out, it's not consistent and half the people don't even know that it's a thing. Great job as always reddit admins!
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Am I retarded? College students are grown adults.
You're not retarded, you're just behind the curve. Words don't mean anything anymore, only rhetoric. Everything is just a chance for a gotcha zinger and semantics is just a tool they can selectively apply to attack you. This is why it's personally degrading to even attempt to have an earnest conversation with these people.

All there is to do is point and laugh.
 
Reddit doesn't even tell you your thread got deleted or why anymore. Completely random chance if it gets bonked the by the jannies.
 
I love finding people's posts where it's just an epistolary novel and the story is: "I'm gay, fat, and retarded". like zero self awareness about how subhuman they are and no attempt to fix it. we are truly in the age of the last men, these guys are eloi and love it. is this microplastics? how do these people even operate a computer? if we forced people to access websites via a telnet prompt so much would be solved.

41, whiny, and helpless
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fat
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i'm too mentally weak to call the dump and ask them how to dump a sofa, and too poor to pay a junk hauler.
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jobless his entire life and laying inert instead of making friends or a life in new city

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Via subredditstats.com, I have found subreddits that fans of each faction are more likely to be members in. Obviously, this isn't a comprehensive list, but are just the ones I found funny. The number next to each is the likeliness modifier; for example, the average member of r/deathwatch40k is about 48 times more likely than the average redditor to be a member of the r/hotwife sub.

  • r/AdeptusCustodes: gundam (19.71), airforce (19.20), daytrading (16.56), sandersforpresident (9.82), centrist (6.93). Conclusion: Ex-military guys with schizophrenic politics.
  • r/AdeptusMechanicus: pathfinder_rpg (14.05), adhdmeme (7.27), dankleft (6.07), theowlhouse (5.88), kerbalspaceprogram (5.39). Conclusion: Current stereotypes are pretty much correct.
  • r/BloodAngels: preppers (15.98), airforce (15.74), menslib (9.04), asktrp (9.01), asktrumpsupporters (8.45). Conclusion: Black Templars got nothing on these guys.
  • r/Chaos40k: veterans (24.84), usmc (12.44), australia (11.76), religiousfruitcake (6.18). Conclusion: NAFO homies.
  • r/deathwatch40k: hotwife (48.83), republican (28.23), japanlife (21.74), christianity (10.48). Conclusion: Dear deathwatch, if claim to be traditionalist conservatives, how come you're 48 times more likely to frequent r/hotwife?
  • r/Eldar: magicthecirclejerking (22.07), pathfinder_rpg (13.71), worldbuilding (11.76), fantasy (7.26). Conclusion: Honestly what I expected.
  • r/EmperorsChildren: debatereligion (59.44), usmc (44.32), fnv (40.41), adhdmeme (33.17), bi_irl (31.16), joebiden (28.77), capitalismvsocialism (26.70), firearms (12.26). Conclusion: Edgy teenagers.
  • r/genestealercult: mendrawingwomen (51.06), anime_irl (16.52), scotland (11.59), femboys (11.43), sluttyconfessions (8.05), massivecock (6.77). Conclusion: Honestly? EC wishes they could be this horny.
  • r/Grey_Knights: dirtysnapchat (31.65), verifiedfeet (28.35), helluvaboss (25.38). Conclusion: Um.
  • r/ImperialFists: hazbinhotel (43.90), shitliberalssay (20.44), confidentlyincorrect (19.82), singapore (18.74), mtf (14.04). Conclusion: Why are the transfemme tankies here of all places? The Emperor gave us Admech for a reason.
  • r/Necrontyr, after getting past the general 40k factions, is all over the place. There really isn't any rhyme or reason to the demographics, so it's hard to draw conclusions.
  • r/NightLords: horny (41.34), prettyaltgirls (33.02), furry (29.94), japanlife (29.94), gothsluts (26.86), boobs (14.74), slut (13.12). Concl- LMAO
  • r/orks iz da same az nekronteer. An' lookin at wut's goin on wiff da gitz like Night Lords n' Grey Knights, dey shud be thankin' Gork n' Mork.
  • r/RavenGuard40k: socialistra (61.00), economy (40.87), shitliberalssay (27.01), latestagecapitalism (16.79). Conclusion: Yeah, that tracks.
  • r/sistersofbattle: belgium (27.62), pawg (16.35), prolife (8.59), cocaine (8.04), ratemynudebody (7.23). Conclusion: what???
  • r/Tau40K: mercifully, they just seem to like big robots. They're a bunch of gamers and they like big fuck-off robots.
  • r/TheAstraMilitarum: worldbuilding (16.72), hoi4 (16.25), usmc (12.13), gayspiderbrothel (9.51). Conclusion: More NAFO homies, but gay this time.
  • r/Tyranids: 2middleeast4you (14.63), asexuality (8.56), furry_irl (5.72), asktransgender (5.40), witchesvspatriarchy (4.38). Conclusion: I feel called out.
Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

EDIT:
Due to requests I will be making another post with factions I left out in a couple days
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Someone remakes this thread on r/topcharactertropes once a week.
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That robot continues to be the most reddit character ever
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Not too sure what this one means.
 
Why do people take pictures of their car dashes WHILE THEY ARE DRIVING, because a certain light comes on? / Archive

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But then again, it is a Nissan so it's totally in character for them to do that. And them showing their prescription and photo reel, instead of uploading the photo itself, and the reddit app notification, is also in character for them too.

And another Infiniti driver crashes his car into a bollard, and asks if it's still driveable: / Archive

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He also blames his brake lines being cut for causing the crash, in typical deflecting blame fashion:

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Put it in “neutral”, you dumb shit. At least no one else has a car repair/hospital bill because of your failure to use common sense.
 
i think it was supposed to be "everyone hates nazis" ?
For anyone unaware this is GI Robot from Creature Commandos.

The whole "gag" with this character is that he was created during WWII to fight Nazis and doesn't know how to do literally anything else.

So when Amanda Waller springs him from supervillan jail or whatever to serve on the new Task Force X he regularly flips out and opens fire on random groups of innocent civilians, screaming about how they're all Nazis and mass murdering them all for no reason.

Reddit finds this absolutely "hilarious" because they are all psychopaths.
 
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Have I married calculating swine?
Let me tell you my story.

When I was still studying in Prague, one evening in a student pub I approached a girl at the bar who had an incredibly penetrating, almost seductive gaze. I invited her for a few drinks and guess what... we ended up at my dorm and fucked like rabbits all night long. Another one-night stand.

In the morning, I woke up with a hangover and she was still there. She said she didn't have any cash for the trip home and asked if I could lend her some. I'm a good soul, so I gave her 200 to get home. I thought that would be the end of it. Over the weekend, she texted me—I don't even know where she got my number, cell phones weren't as common back then—asking if I would take her out for ice cream or some other bullshit. Since I didn't have much to do, I figured, why not. We went somewhere in town, I bought her ice cream and coffee, and we talked for about four hours about other nonsense. The next day, she slept over at my dorm again, and then we went out for coffee and beer. This went on for about half a year, until graduation came and I planned to get on my feet, find a job and a place to live, and break away from all the student bullshit and people who pissed me off.
She was the same age as me and was also finishing school and was actually in the same situation, so she asked me if we could find a place to live together. Okay, I'm easygoing and calm, I thought to myself, what could go wrong, so I went for it, figuring that worst case scenario, I'd pack my three things and get the hell out. Since she loved to cook and needed someone to taste her food, I decided that I would eat it and that I would somehow manage to live together... hopefully. The beginning at work was difficult, but that's how it usually is, and whenever I was in a bad mood or had a hard day, she would bake me something sweet or give me a blowjob or just try to cheer me up somehow. This went on for almost three years, and my mom gave me my grandmother's wedding ring, just in case. So, there I was, standing at the altar, wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into. She, with that stupid smile on her face, had planned and arranged everything, and there was nothing I could do about it. Whenever I wanted something, she would just caress me, saying that she would take care of everything, and then she would give me a blowjob.

Whenever I wanted to interfere or at least get pissed off like a man, she would appease me with some bullshit, caress me, tell me I was the best man under the sun, and I couldn't even fart.

Eleven years have passed and she's still living with me, constantly cooking something and constantly wanting sex or to give me a blowjob. To make matters worse, we have two little copies of her running around the house, and when I want to get pissed off, those two little bitches smile at me and I can't even be pissed off. Then that woman comes and brings me a cake...

Fourteen years ago, I just wanted to get drunk and get laid, nothing more, nothing less. The biggest betrayal is my mother, who is her best friend and they're always laughing together. I don't know what to expect next, to be honest.

I'm curious if you've had a similar experience?
 
I stumbled across this beauty of a post earlier today, where a redditor (/u/Quebber) complains that a mission in a videogame is too difficult for him.

What's this, you ask? Warframe, famous space ninja power-fantasy button mashing looter shooter, is too difficult for this man? Apparently, he's disabled and literally forgets how to press the button for "melee attack" halfway through a mission. I did not make that up by the way. According to him, this isn't his own damn problem, and he wants to contact the developers to add a skip button so he doesn't have to face any challenges.
Reddit Post (emphasis mine) said:
New war is killing my love of Warframe. (disabled accessibility)
I have played Warframe since it's beginning, I have exalibur prime and 2500 hours on pc, New war its just too damn hard, I'm at the point of taking on the archons and i've spent a week trying to get past them.
I have limitations on the way I play, I am classed as severely disabled, my enjoyment of Warframe came from the fact I could play any warframe I wished, put a mediocre build on it and have fun slicing Grineer in half, my favourite weapon is the Ignis Wraith simply because I don't have to aim.
I didn't really mind that I'd never hunted an Eidelon or gained access to new wierd weapons.
Before anyone suggested it, no a controller doesn't make it easier, my brain doesn't function well under pressure, I can't hold combo moves in my head and even after 2500 hours I'll still forget which is the melee key. this isn't a "get gud" scenario.
To put yourself in my shoes imagine if every time you logged into Warframe, there was a 50% chance you would forget all the controlls half way through a mission, imagine if your brain knows it's the E key for melee but while you are running around a mission that knowledge disapears, imagine if you forget the dodge roll system and your brain just stutters.
It's why I put off doing a lot of the quests even though I was missing out on core content and upgrades in the game.
I frikken love the story. adore the music but now even if I could cancel out of the new war mission i'd know that I'd failed and was missing out on content.
I wish DE has implemented a "story mode" for these hard gatekeeper missions for people who didn't care about the challenge and just wanted to go forward to "skip".
Hell I'd pay DE to skip me past those fights.
But something changed this week, after so many tries of the archons instead of Warframe being one of my fun strategies that help me cope and deal with life, my brain is now hesitating when I think of starting the game up, its becoming a negative affect not a positive.
Thank you for the messages I'm going to contact DE and see if they can help on this.
Naturally, I had to poke around and see what kind of disability this person has.

It turns out he has autism spectrum disorder, with ADHD, PTSD, and Bipolar. A classic pairing, really. "Redditor, Autism, ADHD and Bipolar" is like "Burger, Fries, Soda and Ketchup". Speaking of burger and fries, as of 1 month ago he weighed 136kg (300lbs in freedom units). Granted, he claims to have lost 8kg, and was 144kg a month before that. He is diabetic and requires a mobility scooter.

Next, I had to check what other kinds of games he plays. There are several normal ones like Cyberpunk, Minecraft, Skyrim, etc. But what really caught my eye is that he made an AMA post bragging that he traded a VR headset for 17 hentai games. This is not an outlier in his behavior - he has spoken on previous occasions about wanting to hypnotize a woman online, running a forum for erotica, and wants to have a ChatGPT girlfriend.

It's truly remarkable what kinds of things Redditors will confess to completely unprompted.

Bonus:
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