Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

The things that HRC would have done if she was POTUS when the Kung Flu struck is the stuff of nightmares.
Imagine the current power grabs and petty authoritarianism times a thousand.
That's a dodged bullet if there ever was one.

She’d have made Trudeau’s fumbling efforts to become an absolute authority here look like child’s play.

 

[America's Giggling Gigolo]

Even the most docile, uninhibited replicant pleasure model would flip into psycho killer mode when Blobby's sweaty paws come anywhere close.

 

[King Dead]

If it wouldn’t lead to weight gain, I’d suggest Bob ingest 30MG THC every night and chill the fuck out. He is FURIOUS at Panera Bread for their crime of...advertising their business. Panera Bread is made of ASSHOLES!

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To be fair, I am also sick of every single company changing their advertising to the same "we'll get through this together, we're here for you" shit. It's getting pretty tiresome when that's every single commercial. Same inspirational music, same messaging, same hollow corporate blah. No, you don't actually care about me, you just want me to keep spending money at your business. I mean, I get it, I know how capitalism works, but I'd appreciate some honesty. I thought that Bloomberg's constant campaign ads were annoying, but at least they were interspersed with normal commercials. At least you could get a break. Wu Flu commercials are neverending.

Bob, naturally, has to make it creepy by interspersing his reasonable complaints with a comment lusting after fembots. @Flexo, you don't deserve this.

 

[RockVolnutt]

I have no idea what this mass of words is intended to do, except something something MCU:
View attachment 1294562

He's mixing up different scenes of Endgame. There was a scene where the Hulk used the Infinity Gauntlet to bring back the half of the universe's population that Thanos wished away, nothing about bringing back the dead. Later on, Tony manages to get the Gauntlet and uses it to destroy Thanos and his army.

Bob somehow mashed the two together in his head and thinks there's a scene of Tony Stark made it so nobody died ever. I had to double check because he's describing a really bad misremembering of what happened in the movie.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

To be fair, I am also sick of every single company changing their advertising to the same "we'll get through this together, we're here for you" shit. It's getting pretty tiresome when that's every single commercial. Same inspirational music, same messaging, same hollow corporate blah. No, you don't actually care about me, you just want me to keep spending money at your business. I mean, I get it, I know how capitalism works, but I'd appreciate some honesty. I thought that Bloomberg's constant campaign ads were annoying, but at least they were interspersed with normal commercials. At least you could get a break. Wu Flu commercials are neverending.

Bob, naturally, has to make it creepy by interspersing his reasonable complaints with a comment lusting after fembots. @Flexo, you don't deserve this.

He’s enraged that they are letting people know they deliver. That makes them “assholes.” MATTV is no less lulzy than MATI.

 

[אΩ+1]

they should be wearing masks regardless, given what's going on with the homeless population. It's starting to approach San Francisco levels of disease potential.

The superior future city of Los Angeles.

 

[Sexy Peach Emoji]

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"Hey Bob, I don't know you."

See, this is why it's so important for Robert to have that checkmark on his 'personal' account, because now he can't lord over this ungrateful peon. Jordan should be glad Robert noticed him. Alas, instead he has the gall to use one of Robert's favorite moves against him.

 

[Marissa Moira]

If it wouldn’t lead to weight gain, I’d suggest Bob ingest 30MG THC every night and chill the fuck out. He is FURIOUS at Panera Bread for their crime of...advertising their business. Panera Bread is made of ASSHOLES!

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Well I mean broccoli cheddar soup clearly isn't a fembot.

But you could stick your dick in it just the same.

 

[Adamska]

If it wouldn’t lead to weight gain, I’d suggest Bob ingest 30MG THC every night and chill the fuck out. He is FURIOUS at Panera Bread for their crime of...advertising their business. Panera Bread is made of ASSHOLES!

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I guess Billy-Bob Chimpman is mad he can't go to that hipster bar or the movies and he's tired of being told to stop being a miserable consoomer and feel some fucking hope for once.

 

[The Littlest Shitlord]

If it wouldn’t lead to weight gain, I’d suggest Bob ingest 30MG THC every night and chill the fuck out. He is FURIOUS at Panera Bread for their crime of...advertising their business. Panera Bread is made of ASSHOLES!

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I think the most interesting part of this is that it reveals that he actually expects the quarantine to last for years. As if the economy wouldn't completely collapse in that time. As if we wouldn't completely run out of vital goods with production stopped and no money to pay for imports. As if it could even be dragged on that long without an actual armed revolt. As if the epidemic wouldn't gradually subside as survivors became immune. As if there would be absolutely no effective treatments at all until we get a vaccine, despite multiple drugs showing promise.

And you just know that he's inwardly raging at the Obsolete Mayonnaise Ghouls for it though it hasn't even happened yet (and never will). If only they'd just stayed in their holes and died like their betters told them to, then Bob would once again be able to waddle down to the local bar and resume drinking himself to death while bringing home cheap shitty toys for his mentally defective niece. Sacrifices have to be made, for the Superior Future!

What's the deal with "see-through fembots"? They still won't let Bobby touch them.

If anything I'd think they'd be even fussier than ordinary fembots; you'd be able to actually see the greasy fingerprints of repulsive basement-dwellers on their transparent bodies.

 

[Kabuki Actor]

As if there would be absolutely no effective treatments at all until we get a vaccine, despite multiple drugs showing promise.

Basic healthiness is also extremely promising. This is part of why I think it's not at all a natural disease.

 

[Positron]

I think the most interesting part of this is that it reveals that he actually expects the quarantine to last for years. As if the economy wouldn't completely collapse in that time. As if we wouldn't completely run out of vital goods with production stopped and no money to pay for imports. As if it could even be dragged on that long without an actual armed revolt. As if the epidemic wouldn't gradually subside as survivors became immune. As if there would be absolutely no effective treatments at all until we get a vaccine, despite multiple drugs showing promise.

Naomi Wu thinks covid-19 might lead to "mass extinction" and of course she can't be wrong.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Basic healthiness is also extremely promising. This is part of why I think it's not at all a natural disease.

Bob is so morbidly obese that he HAS to know he’s a goner if he catches it. Which is probably making him take a hard look at his life and everything he hasn’t done or experienced. A LOT of people are going through this. But most of them have at least been kissed. It makes sense why Bob hasn’t known a peaceful waking moment recently — not that he was the picture of serenity BEFORE lockdown.

 

[Kabuki Actor]

Naomi Wu thinks covid-19 might lead to "mass extinction" and of course she can't be wrong.

As a geopolitical consquence, maybe.

I AM NOT AFFILIATED WITH THESE BIRDS

Edit: That's the worst twitter bio without pronouns that I've ever seen.

 

[Mr Snek]

I have no idea what this mass of words is intended to do, except something something MCU:
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Holy shit, did Bob just call out a flaw in a Marvel movie? Isn't that considered heresy in his mind? Aside from him messing up on what Tony Stark did with the gauntlet, he is absolutely right with Hawkeye going nuts and murdering hundreds of criminals for 5 years after Thanos killed his family, which no one ever mentions again. I'd forgotten it because it was one of the smaller plot holes in Endgame, but Bob bringing it up is like Obama pointing out black on black crime statistics.

 

[Krokodil Overdose]

Holy shit, did Bob just call out a flaw in a Marvel movie? Isn't that considered heresy in his mind? Aside from him messing up on what Tony Stark did with the gauntlet, he is absolutely right with Hawkeye going nuts and murdering hundreds of criminals for 5 years after Thanos killed his family, which no one ever mentions again. I'd forgotten it because it was one of the smaller plot holes in Endgame, but Bob bringing it up is like Obama pointing out black on black crime statistics.

Given that there was supposed to be a mid-level societal breakdown as a result of the Snap, I always saw it as the whole world being the Wild West in that five-year period. The Avengers seem to spend the whole time running damage control shit that would normally fall to civil authorities.

And I think it's not heresy for Bob because Hawkeye hits almost every bullet point for his "obsoletes:" Straight, white, male, does physical labor in the military (or something very much like it,) has gotten laid. He probably thinks that the flying death platforms from Winter Soldier would have been The Superior Future if not for the whole HYDRA thing.

 

[blablabla]

If it wouldn’t lead to weight gain, I’d suggest Bob ingest 30MG THC every night and chill the fuck out. He is FURIOUS at Panera Bread for their crime of...advertising their business. Panera Bread is made of ASSHOLES!

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Maybe you should think about the people delivering your shitty food instead of bitching to no one on twitter you fat piece of shit

 

[dzonatan]

Has anyone who went to school with Bob ever showed up ITT? I’m dying to know what kind of bullying he was subjected to that was so epic that he’s assblasted to this day.

Likely nothing out of the ordinary.
Even if it did escalated it was mostly because he wouldn't fight back or overreact.
Most people get over highschool because they're not oversensitive.
That's the thing with lolcows and autists, they're oversensitive and take everything seriously/personally.

 

[Johan Schmidt]

Likely nothing out of the ordinary.
Even if it did escalated it was mostly because he wouldn't fight back or overreact.
Most people get over highschool because they're not oversensitive.
That's the thing with lolcows and autists, they're oversensitive and take everything seriously/personally.

As efap once said.
'Hey bob can I have one of your four cheese burgers?'
"Why are you bullying me"

Was probably how it went. Or someone told a joke and he sperged out.

 

[iafiv]

Face masks are actually commonly worn in asian societies.In a practical sense having a good face mask to partially filter out not just Covid but all the other pollutants that are common in major cities is not such a bad idea.Once upon a time the idea of wearing a seat belt would have seemed weird.Now its common.Yeah there is a dystopian element to it but we don't exactly live in the best of times.We live better than our ancestors but the margin of error if something goes terribly wrong is far smaller today than in the past.It wasn't theoretically possible in the past to wipe out humanity if you were a disgruntled individual.Today maybe if say they manufacture a virus in a lab.Yes the effectiveness of face masks is partial but then again a seat belt won't save you in every car crash either.