Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[T the KA]

I still can't believe that The Escapist is still alive, since it really is just Yahtzee at this point.

 

[UserAccess]

If I recall it started here and here, when Chris was presumably reacting to people's indignation over Derek Chauvin's mistrial.


Chris just liked that post; it doesn't say it is from the company he works with. I can't read the story unless I have a LinkedIn account.

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For those curious, you can find this item in the white trash department at Lowes for $295.26. That's approximately $150.00 per Chipman unless the final and rarely photographed sibling kicked in.

Wracked with pity for their misshapen heads, Ma Chipman decided to keep Bob and Chris instead of flicking them in the Arby's dumpster behind the hospital like most reasonable people. I think they owe her a lot more than this eyesore.

 

[Adamska]

Also an early example of his consoomerist devotion - listen to how fervently he feels the need to defend McDonald's honor, and how he describes the "mythology of McDonaldsland" as influential in his childhood. (What fucking mythology?)

You know those weird Burgerland commercials from the early 80s that McD's ran back then? That's probably what this fat baby means.

Remember, that shit to Bob is half-cocaine, half actually meeting with and speaking to God. Reminder Bob cried when Yoshi's Island nuked the North American Canon partially because he always had a hope that he could himself possibly find a way to make it to the Mushroom Kingdom himself.

Also reminder that half the reason he "FUCKING LOVES SCIENCE" is because he wants to Bing Bing Wahoo forever in a Matrioshka Brain.

 

[Positron]

As for Bob, I have to wonder if he's missing some teeth and that's the reason he never smiles. He's probably doing that face because he thinks it makes him look suave and cool, with the thumbs up included to make himself look more positive, but the missing teeth would not surprise me.

Count it our blessing that Bobby never does the soyface gape like Chris does, and thumb-up is infinitely less autistic than the V-sign.

I hope that Bob doesn't watch SNL because Grimes might have a new stalker, and this is the episode that Elon Musk (who plays Wario in this sketch) is guest hosting.

He knows about it nonetheless:



As if Bobby had a problem with exploitative billionaire narcissists! If anything he counts these as virtues.

Uninhabited wasteland skewed our election reeeee!!!!!!


Empowering girls is bad if the Right do it:


Elizabeth Bruenig. Bobby is so one-track minded:

(archive.today went belly-up so I can't read Bruenig's Mother's Day article on NYT. The paywalled link)

+ + + +
Luke and Bobby discuss the moral implications of MCU:


Old video game:


Tits shills derivative YA trash:

I'd be very amazed if any publisher wants to sign her up, especially as she looks like your Asian amah:

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

If I recall it started here and here, when Chris was presumably reacting to people's indignation over Derek Chauvin's mistrial.

I forgot about these. No wonder he wants to go see Green Day so badly.

The tough-guy posturing of Phil "ADF" is more convincing.

Did he or we ever establish what this thing even is? Is it supposed to be his homemade CHUD skull basher? It looks like the bottom might be made out of brass. The top is PVC. If that's true then that means all the weight for his bash the fash mace is right at his hand which is not where you want it. I'm glad he didn't spend somewhere around $80k on an engineering degree... ohhhhhhhhhhh

 

[instythot]

Old video game:
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For a fat autist who claims to be a video game expert, Bob sure doesn't pay a lot of attention to anything outside Mario. Let's look at Capcom and Konami, current license holders of 8 bit classics Mega Man and Castlevania. How often do they do anything with the licenses, and is it ever unrelated to a licence anniversary anymore? Mario is the exception. Maybe today's kids don't want their parents' toys and their parents want more modern games if they even play anymore, and maybe studios grasp that if nobody wants to do stuff with most of the icons, nobody wants to buy reboots of 30 year dead obscure properties. Plus what do you even do with them? Modernizing them will piss off existing fans and not modernizing them will keep new customers away

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Old video game:
View attachment 2157738

"I don't care if they're trash made by hacks, I want more movies based on my childhood games!"

God, how did somebody with such awful taste get to be a film critic?

 

[Doctor of Autism]

I saw this meme, and was wondering if Bob has ever commented on the theory that Peach gets “kidnapped” on purpose?
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He wouldn't because Bob has this very weird political interpretation of Mario where Bowser kidnaps her as a political move against the Mushroom Kingdom and it's part of a elaborate war. Yes Bob really does believe there is deep political subtext to fucking Mario.

Count it our blessing that Bobby never does the soyface gape like Chris does, and thumb-up is infinitely less autistic than the V-sign.


He knows about it nonetheless:
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As if Bobby had a problem with exploitative billionaire narcissists! If anything he counts these as virtues.

Bob is just mad because Elon Musk is not on his side of the aisle and would've loved Elon's SNL shenanigans if Elon was more woke or an attractive woman.

 

[instythot]

He wouldn't because Bob has this very weird political interpretation of Mario where Bowser kidnaps her as a political move against the Mushroom Kingdom and it's part of a elaborate war. Yes Bob really does believe there is deep political subtext to fucking Mario.


Bob is just mad because Elon Musk is not on his side of the aisle and would've loved Elon's SNL shenanigans if Elon was more woke or an attractive woman.

So does Jim Sterling, but in Sterling's defence, that fatty also thinks he's a fetching lady

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

Nigga, please.

 

[Kyria the Great]

With Bob's Trans-human accelerationist viewpoints, I am deeply surprised he isn't a reactionary in the vain of the hilarious Dark Enlightenment.

 

[instythot]

With Bob's Trans-human accelerationist viewpoints, I am deeply surprised he isn't a reactionary in the vain of the hilarious Dark Enlightenment.

I guarantee you that if bob hadn't pursued fairly small portions to destroy his body to the point of needing a new one in a few years, he'd have the exact opposite opinion on transhumanism

 

[Randall Fragg]

With Bob's Trans-human accelerationist viewpoints, I am deeply surprised he isn't a reactionary in the vain of the hilarious Dark Enlightenment.

That’s Bob’s next stage of ideological evolution when Wokism finally crashes and burns.
“We need a Techno-King to brutally oppress the subhuman peasants who are too dumb to rule over themselves.”

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

He knows about it nonetheless:
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As if Bobby had a problem with exploitative billionaire narcissists! If anything he counts these as virtues.

I think his main problem with Musk is that it's taking him too long to build the starship.

He wants it to be like a Marvel movie, where Tony Stark can put some numbers in a computer and instantly figure out how to time travel.

 

[instythot]

I think his main problem with Musk is that it's taking him too long to build the starship.

He wants it to be like a Marvel movie, where Tony Stark can put some numbers in a computer and instantly figure out how to time travel.

Nah, Musk isn't proven to vote for the correct team while having fun and enjoying success. He's also better at Twitter than Bob

 

[Captain Marvelous]

I hope that Bob doesn't watch SNL because Grimes might have a new stalker, and this is the episode that Elon Musk (who plays Wario in this sketch) is guest hosting.

He knows about it nonetheless:



As if Bobby had a problem with exploitative billionaire narcissists! If anything he counts these as virtues.

Does anyone think this sketch was written to spite Bob? It's an SNL sketch where one of the people Bob hates the most plays someone who killed Bob's idol.

Also, has anyone even seen the sketch? Because WOW, is it bad. It makes the Mario movie look like high art in comparison.

 

[Mola Ram]

Does anyone think this sketch was written to spite Bob? It's an SNL sketch where one of the people Bob hates the most plays someone who killed Bob's idol.

Also, has anyone even seen the sketch? Because WOW, is it bad. It makes the Mario movie look like high art in comparison.

That was almost bad enough to be a Game Overthinker sketch.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

That was almost bad enough to be a Game Overthinker sketch.

"It should be me, damnit! Musk doesn't know a thing about Mario!"

 

[instythot]

That was almost bad enough to be a Game Overthinker sketch.

So... you're saying Bob's path out of e-begging is maintaining SNL sketches at the current quality level? I would love to see his audition tapes (even the writers need to audition)

 

[MirrorNoir]

Also an early example of his consoomerist devotion - listen to how fervently he feels the need to defend McDonald's honor, and how he describes the "mythology of McDonaldsland" as influential in his childhood. (What fucking mythology?)

The mythology of McDonalds as a kid friendly safe space your parents take you to for a free fast food meal, a toy with your meal, and a fancy outdoor playground/jungle gym you can play on for about 10-20 minutes after you eat. Combined with the fact that 99% of McDonalds advertising in the 80s and early 90s was Ronald McDonald and friends until they said "fuck it" and pretty much stopped using Ronald and company as mascots and went all in on 100% adult centric ad campaigns.