Game Overthinker v7: "The Psychology of Nintendo Fans" + Betchloff podcast
It's 2008. The Wii is selling, Nintendo is booming, and Nintendo fans are jizzing their pants white. Bob's here to break down the reasons why the Nintendo fanboys act like Nintendo acolytes, by acting like the most drugged-out preacher in the room.
Nothing more can accurately describe the absolute insanity of this episode, other than this short story from bob.
Where does this come from? Why are Nintendo fans so devoted to the fortunes and reputation of not just a console, but its brand, its makers, its company? The answer, or at least part of it is simple, but not easy. I'm gonna attempt to lay it out for you, but you're gonna have to use your imagination for a moment okay?
Picture this: you're walking down a dark and miserable street, following a dark and miserable day at work. a sudden sense of the familiar comes over you, and as you stop and take note of your surroundings, you're struck by the realization that you're standing in front of the house you grew up in. And when I say the house you grew up in , I mean precisely that. It's painted like it was when you were a kid. Your treehouse is still standing. Dad's car is in the driveway. That asshole who moved in after you and tore down the swing set and sandbox so he could build a barbecue pit? He's not living there.
Before you could get your bearings, you hear an unmistakable but impossible sound coming from the backyard. "It can't be!" you tell yourself, but your legs are already moving. You dash to the yard you take one look and you drop to your knees in total astonishment. As you realize in defiance of all known laws of this world and the next, your dog is alive again. Part of you wants to know what's going on, part of you doesn't really care. You're just indescribably happy.
And just then there's a sound in the bushes. You turn and you swallow hard, expecting at any moment M. Night Shyamalan is gonna spring forth and that you've died on the way out from work, and this is heaven, but it's not the director of the village. Instead, the bushes yield a funny Japanese man. He announces himself as the proprietor of this magical place, and makes known both his ability and his intention to maintain and preserve it for however often and however long you may wish him to. In compensation, he asks for only roughly $200 and change once every 6 or 7 years, so he may continue to finance the production of niche market video game consoles.
Before he can continue or answer his terms, your attention is drawn at the near horizon. Over it you can hear the gnashing of teeth and the stomping of cloven hooves. An army is approaching, a dark army representing everything that is corrupt and painful and dark about the world outside of your newly found oasis. Without a word passing between the two of you, you've come to understand the stakes: if the funny Japanese man is not here to guard this magic place where everything that was once good and right in the world remains unspoiled, it will fall to this army of evil. If he doesn't stop them, they will burn your childhood home to the ground, or repurpose it into some dark abomination. And then they'll shoot the dog, and prop his corpse up as some grotesque puppet show. As proof of this, your eyes are drawn to what's left of the Sega house across the street.
Given that, given all of that, wouldn't you give the funny Japanese man the money? Hell, would it really be odd to find yourself swearing allegiance and fealty, to this great man, and his holy mission?
This isn't just Bob giving us a heartfelt retelling of what the average Nintendo fan feels when they open their new Bing Bing Wahoo game out of the little plastic game case, this is most definitely a real life dream that he's has experienced himself. All of this can be explained with the video down below.
A big thank you to
@Arthur Morgan for having a copy of this once lost podcast on hand. In this video my nigga James lays it out how much of a Nutter Butter Bob was and has become.
-Bob used to hang out on this bygone extreme left gaming forum/chatroom/friendsite
-James meets pre-Game Overthinker Bob on said site
-Bob then confides to James and many others on this site his emotions and these weird dreams he's been having
The extra spicy Bob lore that James learned thru interacting with Bob:
-James confirms MovieBob hates FPS because they were more popular than Nintendo at the time
-FPS became popular during the Bush years
-He has since then conflated this hatred towards conservatives and republicans
-Bob was a lonely as fuck kid/teen/non-specified age
-Grandma died and dog died during this time
-At the same time Dad was either not home or busy away from home
-Bob developed resentment for the world from all of this
-Nintendo became Bob's only outlet for a long time
-James Confirms Bob has made Nintendo his religion
-Mario is Bob's Jesus and Miyamoto his God.
-Bob claims he had a dream very similar to the story above
-Just replace the evil army with Gears of War and Soap Mactavish
-Bob believes in a conspiracy that the US gov uses FPS games to hypnotize gamers into killing "brown people"
-Bob believes the game "NARC" caused a drug epidemic in the 80s
-Bob believes the US and EA or Activision colluded together so FPS games would cause 9/11
-Bob used to have dreams of Princess Lana calling out to him
-Bob has then compiled all of his Nintendo dreams and visions into this fan-fic that's been lost to time.
-This fan-fic is eerily similar to the Anti-thinker storyline.
-This fan-fic also included Bob being given a sword that could create portals to other worlds
-Then Bob would use this sword to fight along side Nintendo characters in a war against characters from FPS games
-Bob believed along side his fellow forum members that death was only an idea that was invented by
the jedi man, and could be defeated
-Bob once tried to cosplay as Shigeru Miyamoto
-Bob believed along side his fellow forum members that reality is malleable
-and with enough power you could at will simply alter your perception of it and therefore change reality with merely a thought.
-This is most likely derived from a misunderstanding on how Plato's cave works, sprinkled in with some comic book logic.
-MovieBob also doesn't like Overwatch
these are all stories for 10-15 years ago, so maybe perhaps has changed since then, but most likely not. Next episode is about race politics and Resident Evil 5
