Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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On a sidenote, how hard would it be to make a Bob simulator? The man is additcted to twitter. I know jack shit about neural networks but, based of his social media output can't you already make a chatbot that spews the same detritus as moviebob? You have 10 years worth of data, it's not for a lack of interactions.
I mean, there's not too much variation in his standard posts ("MCU awesome! Conservatives evil!") and his go to response to any pushback ("you're not a person!") is basically an AI scripted-level of engagement.
 
I do too, but it's because most stats in an RPG that let you do one thing require multiple "stats" to be high in real life. I'll go through a few fantasy examples since RPGs are mentioned:

Hand-to-Hand: Sure, being strong will let you hit a little harder, but as a trained boxer or sword master will tell you, striking power isn't all that important in the grand scheme of things (the force of your swing or where the pressure is applied does most of the work). Footwork (or movement for wrestling disciplines), proper breathing, and being able to work the angles properly is the key to succeeding in any martial discipline. Even zweihanders only weighed about 15 lbs, and I haven't found an adult yet who couldn't lift or swing that at least once. Relevant stats: DEX, END, WIS

Archery: Retards like to think that bowmen are all reedy stickmen, but the truth is the best bowmen tended towards being large. Reason being pulling back an arrow string with a 120 lbs draw weight all day will wear you the hell out. This was before you had any precious pulleys on your bow to help you out, so the men on the tower who fired the longbows were strong as oxen. However, hand eye coordination is indeed important. Almost as important as a firm grasp of mathematics, as the bowmen who could calculate angles and distances were far and away superior to their less educated comrades. Relevant stats: INT, DEX, END, STR

Magic: Well, sufficiently advanced technology is basically our form of magic, so this falls more under scientific study for us. But the best scientists weren't just smart: they could also communicate their ideas to laymen and explain what they were doing to get funding. Furthermore, they had to have the ability to painstakingly stick to a method of research for a long time in order to achieve their results. Researchers don't just do research, they build networks of colleagues and test theories for months or years before they can present findings. Magicians in a fantasy world are much the same. Relevant stats: WIS, INT, END, CHA

Talking: People think having a silver tongue isn't related to your looks, and it's true that I've met some ugly guys who could charm the paint off a wall. However, there's more to persuasion than just being charming. Persuasive people need to figure out what people want and how they can give it to them, and what everyone wants can and will vary from person to person. Furthermore, the more attractive you are the more people will listen to you (can't beat a good first impression). Most of this comes from experience, which is why old salesmen tend to do better than their younger counterparts: they've figured out what works and what doesn't and they didn't let failures get them down. Relevant stats: INT, CHA, WIS

In conclusion: Terminally online video game addicts have no call to be talking about dump stats, because in real life there ARE no dump stats. You have to work to improve each one. People might have some higher than others, but that's why people form teams. We benefit from having people covering each other's weaknesses. The truth is, people who shit on gym rats and claim to be more intelligent and charismatic just isn't true. In fact, their stats tend to be lower because they've spent no time working on them. That's why people like Bob suffer despite their delusions: in reality, their stats are so low they simply cannot function properly in society, leaving them stuck in ruts and living in their parents house. They are literally low level characters with terrible rolls, and they don't even know it. But instead of leveling up, they want to inflict negative levels on everyone else to make themselves feel better. And we all know how we feel about level drain...

I'm EnemyStand and this has been my TEDTalk.
I'm gonna stat out Bob as a D&D monster.
 
So the Nintendo Direct just announced a new Mario Strikers is coming out. Is this better or worse than the Mario Bros. movie in Bloberts eyes or will he not even comment on this?
 
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Would Nurgle reject him? His fetid kitchen concoctions seem like they'd win his favor...
Too selfish to spread Nurgle's plague.
Too lazy to get blood for the blood throne.
Too pathetic to enact Slanesh's lust.
Too enduring in his ways that even Tzeentch can't change him.
Too weak for Gork.
Too stupid for Mork.

Denied by all the ruinous powers, all that is left for Bob is Malice.
 
Chu-chu thinks he is more resourceful than a gorilla, and Bobby thinks he can outthrow a silverback. Let's drop both of them to a jungle in Congo and see who goes extinct first.
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I partially understand the point Bob is trying to make. Fitness shouldn't just be about having the most mass. You see it with all the roided up wrestlers and bodybuilders that have died over the years. But if Bob really believed this he would be able to acknowledge that he isn't in good shape.

The fact that he won't proves that is more he was of justifying that he's really the one that is in good shape and all the fitness experts aren't.
I love idiots like this. Trust me, the gym bros and cardio bunnies aren't going extinct. A healthy mind exists inside a healthy body, something we've known for eons (source: monks, pick any flavor you want, they all exercised and were scholars). It's just now that people like Blob and ChuChu constantly shit on the efforts of people trying to get physically better than they were. Sure, you might not ever become a 6'5" muscle man, but you can always be stronger than you were. But lard asses need to cope, and cope they do. They say they're smarter because they're NOT fit, when anyone can tell you the people closer to a normal weight have improved mental focus and cognitive quickness, two things you need to be considered smart.

As a side note, no one can hate on fatties like former fatties. I've found my tolerance for fatasses huffing pure copium like I did for years drop dramatically the more weight I lose.
Part of the problem with people like Bob and Chu is that they mentally are not capable of handling people who are of real strength. These leftist activists all pose and larp as being strong people. But when you put them in the presence of real strength they suddenly all lose their shit because they lose all their coping mechanisms about how weak they really are.

A good example of this happened last year with a Twitter account named Orwell and Goode. He's a well known shitposter and meme account that has been mentioned in a few threads on here. Last year some Antifa account doxxed him. While they initially celebrated, they all started having severe tism fits when they realized he was actually a buff and financially successful young man instead of the neckbeard stereotype they all portray their enemies as.
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Covid restrictions:
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Bad as restrictions are, I'm sure it won't reach the level of trauma of 'Nam or, equivalently, the Console Wars.
The only fyuuchaa Moviebob cares about is his own. He has no fucks to give in regards to anyone else, let alone their children.



Jesse Watter's guest explains why Denmark has controlled the covid so well, but never mind that: focus on Bobby's random bout of feminism:
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I can't see the "wincing" BTW.



Nick Sandmann was the victim of slanderous and libelous press coverage. Moviebob is a victim by profession.



Your daily Nazi alerts:
"Nazi alert" can also be summarized as "Moviebob post incoming!" I'm not going to react to the posts related to this caption.



Bobby's livelihood involves art criticism -- and the CIA.
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"Education is a life-long pursuit"... unless you're Moviebob, which renders education as a waste of time, effort, and bandwidth.



"Thinkers™ and Believers™"? I'VE GOT BINGO!



He is indeed very angry:
When is Moviebob ever not angry?

Case in point:
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Yes, Moviebob claims that "intellectualy dishonest" and "intellectuall deficient" detractors of his don't know a single, solitary thing about him... despite having well over a quarter-million Twitter posts on his feed. Trust us, Bob: Your life is much futher open to public scrutiny than your tiny brain claims it to be.
 
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For the record Chu-chu's latest spleen was not about gym workouts, but about air filtering. Chu-chu suffers from every kind of allergy and feels personally offended by the suggestion that people should rely on their innate immunity rather than air filters.

So the Nintendo Direct just announced a new Mario Strikers is coming out. Is this better or worse than the Mario Bros. movie in Bloberts eyes or will he not even comment on this?
Bobby will consoom it just to see Peach's high kicks.

Can you imagine that Bahstan kids will go to school without masks in the near future?
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For the record Chu-chu's latest spleen was not about gym workouts, but about air filtering. Chu-chu suffers from every kind of allergy and feels personally offended by the suggestion that people should rely on their innate immunity rather than air filters.
That's even dumber and I' ve effort posted about that dumbass conversation enough. I refuse to waste more braincells.
"ONLY GOVERNMENT OPPRESSION CAN SAVE US NOW! REPRESS ME!" These Chipman idiots need to be deported to China. Yes, I know they're supposedly American citizens but we'd get some Hong Kongers who appreciate freedom. What was it the lefties said...oh yes! "You just don't want to homeschool your own kids!"
 
I hate that RPG mentality, "oh I'm not fit, that means all my stat points are put in Intellect instead". I want to beat up dweebs like that. You must read like a scholar, lift like a barbarian and argue like an autist.

On a sidenote, how hard would it be to make a Bob simulator? The man is additcted to twitter. I know jack shit about neural networks but, based of his social media output can't you already make a chatbot that spews the same detritus as moviebob? You have 10 years worth of data, it's not for a lack of interactions.
I'll just leave these words of wisdom here
 
Hey Chris, here's a parenting protip from someone who isn't a parent but apparently still knows more than you: kids get sick. A lot. They get into all kinds of stuff, incubating all manner of illnesses, and odds are good they'll transfer some of those to their parents over the years. No amount of flimsy face coverings are going to change this fact.

Slight powerlevel, but I was a substitute teacher for a while, years before the coof. Within a couple weeks, I'd caught the flu from someone at the school, though I have no idea who it might have been. Didn't realize it at first, it was only at the end of one of the days after I caught it where I was miserable and about to throw up, and barely managed to keep it together until I got to a clinic and got a Tamiflu prescription. It took barely any time being around kids all day before I'd managed to pick up a bug.

Point being, if you didn't want to get sick all the time, then you shouldn't have had kids. And quit being selfish and treating your children like plaguebearers. They're already suffering from being autistic Chipmans, and now you want them to suffer the ineffectual mask so you feel a little safer. Fuck you, Chris, grow up and deal with this fucking cold like a man.
 
38 years old, acts like a perpetually frightened 5 year old child.
Hey Chris, here's a parenting protip from someone who isn't a parent but apparently still knows more than you: kids get sick. A lot. They get into all kinds of stuff, incubating all manner of illnesses, and odds are good they'll transfer some of those to their parents over the years. No amount of flimsy face coverings are going to change this fact.

Slight powerlevel, but I was a substitute teacher for a while, years before the coof. Within a couple weeks, I'd caught the flu from someone at the school, though I have no idea who it might have been. Didn't realize it at first, it was only at the end of one of the days after I caught it where I was miserable and about to throw up, and barely managed to keep it together until I got to a clinic and got a Tamiflu prescription. It took barely any time being around kids all day before I'd managed to pick up a bug.

Point being, if you didn't want to get sick all the time, then you shouldn't have had kids. And quit being selfish and treating your children like plaguebearers. They're already suffering from being autistic Chipmans, and now you want them to suffer the ineffectual mask so you feel a little safer. Fuck you, Chris, grow up and deal with this fucking cold like a man.
I'm assuming "Da Chippa!" is not only fully vaxxed but also got boosted - so he should not be panicking. Of course like many COVIDiots I guess it's not about actual health and protection, but carrying on in performative social media posturing that allowed him to act righteous for two years straight.
I'll just leave these words of wisdom here
Yet Bluto still wound up becoming a U.S. Senator.
 
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