Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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My goal is high-octane shitposting

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

FLY THE BANNER


Corporate drone Moviebob gets called out. Moviebob reverts defelction as its only natural response (decensored):
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Here's my question: Given Moviebob lives in a "basement apartment", does Bob's kitchen even receive the sunlight necessary to grow tomatoes that are any larger than raisins?
Also, tomatoes last about a week in cold storage, at least in any condition you'd want to eat them in. "Fresh" implies they just came off the vine and have NOT been through any kind of preservation/storage. No surprise he doesn't understand the concept of "Fresh" produce. Probably thinks that a can of tomato paste is "Fresh tomatoes" if he JUST opened the can.


And what's with the toilet comment? Is he saying we somehow get our fertilizer from them like spreading the cow manure around? Toilet waste goes directly to the sewer or septic system, it's not and open system to feed your own garden plants, at least I hope to GOD Bob's isn't.

Again, he's so quick to assert nonexistent superior intellect that he trips over his own clownshoes and blames it on "the stupids" of Middle America.
 
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Seriously. How many times did Eli (who, I will remind anyone who is not aware, is an unapologetic, unlicensed dealer of sexual reassignment drugs TO MINORS, yet is claiming the moral high ground over us autistic faggots) have to refresh that page to make sure he got the exact quote he wanted, anyway? I wonder if it still generates the quote about the ghastly smelling crotch lint or the guy who begged his mother to have sex with him.

Oh I uh did not know that. Son of a bitch.
Eli Erlick is also an alleged rapist, including a woman who claims he fisted her to bleeding despite her protests after refusing to consent.
 
Eli Erlick is also an alleged rapist, including a woman who claims he fisted her to bleeding despite her protests after refusing to consent.

I have said it many times: with a very few exceptions -- mostly, I would guess, people who predate the current Trans Madness, and people who fit that mold -- all transgenderism is violence against women. F2M are victims of surgical butchery, and M2F are predators.
 
And what's with the toilet comment? Is he saying we somehow get our fertilizer from them like spreading the cow manure around? Toilet waste goes directly to the sewer or septic system, it's not and open system to feed your own garden plants, at least I hope to GOD Bob's isn't.

Again, he's so quick to assert nonexistent superior intellect that he trips over his own clownshoes and blames it on "the stupids" of Middle America.
Also worth noting that cold storage and even arguably flush toilets' predate the Romans. Bob botched two of his three examples of things invented since the Romans did stuff. The light bulb is also a specific technological advance, the filament, not the dawn of inside lighting.

Bob, being a simpleton, regularly confuses conceptual knowledge, capacity and capability. There's no reason to assume an intelligent Roman couldn't have understood the concepts of all three examples better than Bob currently does despite having the entirety of human knowledge available at instant recall from the use of his fat fingertips. (The latter fact being that which Bob uses to justify his refusal to ever learn anything.)
 
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Corporate drone Moviebob gets called out. Moviebob reverts defelction as its only natural response (decensored):
Screen Shot 2022-08-20 at 12.34.20.png

Here's my question: Given Moviebob lives in a "basement apartment", does Bob's kitchen even receive the sunlight necessary to grow tomatoes that are any larger than raisins?
Sorry fren but I gotta correct ya. Bob is not a corporate drone. He is an unpaid shill.
 
Bob senpai noticed us, and not in a passive-aggressive tsundere way for once.

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Lolcows: Infinity War when?

Edit: Jesus Christ, Bob stop retweeting, you twitter addicted chaser.
I always find the narratives they make for this website extremely impressive, we went from neo nazis, to child groomers to now the illuminati with autism. Its like what happened for 4chan only way more retarded.


Hes so far past NPC and is just full cog mode.
 
Also worth noting that cold storage and even arguably flush toilets' predate the Romans. Bob botched two of his three examples of things invented since the Romans did stuff. The light bulb is also a specific technological advance, the filament, not the dawn of inside lighting.

Bob, being a simpleton, regularly confuses conceptual knowledge, capacity and capability. There's no reason to assume an intelligent Roman couldn't have understood the concepts of all three examples better than Bob currently does despite having the entirety of human knowledge available at instant recall from the use of his fat fingertips. (The latter fact being that which Bob uses to justify his refusal to ever learn anything.)
Yeah, there's nothing we as common folk use today that a Roman wouldn't be able to get up to speed on in a few hours when it came to using and a few months if they wanted to learn the fundamentals of how it works, or a couple years if they wanted to master building/designing their own.



If we can teach children how incandescent lights and internal combustion engines work, there's no reason we can't teach a full grown person....

We are not "smarter" than those who came before us, and our predecessors were not "dumber" than us, they just hadn't found the answer yet. The idea that a Roman would flee in terror from a power saw and instantly regard us Gods for having one, like happens in time-travel cartoons, is a temporal kind of racism, actually..... once they realized the loud noises were just a consequence of the thing WORKING they'd want to know how to use it like any other kid watching their Dad cut lumber with one would and by the end of the first day would be able to work along side you building the deck with no issue, just like Junior.

People are people.

Bob seems to think modern people, at least the ones he supports, are somehow evolutionary superiors and are born just knowing stuff, and not the beneficiaries of 2,000 years of humanity passing along notes.....
 
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Yeah, there's nothing we as common folk use today that a Roman wouldn't be able to get up to speed on in a few hours when it came to using and a few months if they wanted to learn the fundamentals of how it works, or a couple years if they wanted to master building/designing their own.



If we can teach children how incandescent lights and internal combustion engines work, there's no reason we can't teach a full grown person....

We are not "smarter" than those who came before us, and our predecessors were not "dumber" than us, they just hadn't found the answer yet. The idea that a Roman would flee in terror from a power saw and instantly regard us Gods for having one, like happens in time-travel cartoons, is a temporal kind of racism, actually..... once they realized the loud noises were just a consequence of the thing WORKING they'd want to know how to use it like any other kid watching their Dad cut lumber with one would and by the end of the first day would be able to work along side you building the deck with no issue, just like Junior.

People are people.

Bob seems to think modern people, at least the ones he supports, are somehow evolutionary superiors and are born just knowing stuff, and not the beneficiaries of 2,000 years of humanity passing along notes.....
People always do that when it comes to discussing history. I've seen a few history buffs joke about people saying shit like "I could take over the Middle Ages with a gun" because they don't realize firearms go back hundreds of years, they wouldn't be an alien concept to people at the time. Hell, a fun thing to think about is humanity already discovered steam power right before the 1st century and we could've had an industrial revolution that predates Jesus. The problem is they didn't yet figure out any practical use for it so it was just regarded as a party toy.

The irony is the same thing will happen to us in a few hundred years. Ignorant people of the future wondering why we couldn't figure things that seem "obvious" to them.
 
Bob seems to think modern people, at least the ones he supports, are somehow evolutionary superiors and are born just knowing stuff, and not the beneficiaries of 2,000 years of humanity passing along notes.....
Bob sees the view and assumes he must be a giant who EARNED that view rather than ever looking down to notice he's standing on the shoulders of those giants he assumes were all midgets.
 
People always do that when it comes to discussing history. I've seen a few history buffs joke about people saying shit like "I could take over the Middle Ages with a gun" because they don't realize firearms go back hundreds of years, they wouldn't be an alien concept to people at the time. Hell, a fun thing to think about is humanity already discovered steam power right before the 1st century and we could've had an industrial revolution that predates Jesus. The problem is they didn't yet figure out any practical use for it so it was just regarded as a party toy.
One of my favorite "what if?" thought experiments is "How long would it take me to successfully teach Ben Franklin how to drive a stick shift car?"

And I contend I can teach anyone in a weekend how to do it.
 
Kiwifarms is trending
So that's why I keep having connection problems. I have no idea that this Keffals guy has so much clout.

Given he lives in a "basement apartment", does Bob's kitchen even receive the sunlight necessary to grow tomatoes that are any larger than raisins?
Who needs a kitchen when a fairly small portion of food is just a phone call away?
 
My goals are to see Bob finally get his comeuppance (whatever form that takes), see Brianna Wu outed as a grifter, and hopefully get a look at the crime scene photos for Lowtax's An Heroing. I expect disappointment on all three fronts.
Those are worthy goals. However can we say Bob hasn't had any comeuppance? He's been fired, lost plenty of opportunities, and is now back living with his mother. The only things left are losing his twitter feed, youtube channel, and getting fired by MatPat.
Yeah, there's nothing we as common folk use today that a Roman wouldn't be able to get up to speed on in a few hours when it came to using and a few months if they wanted to learn the fundamentals of how it works, or a couple years if they wanted to master building/designing their own.



If we can teach children how incandescent lights and internal combustion engines work, there's no reason we can't teach a full grown person....

We are not "smarter" than those who came before us, and our predecessors were not "dumber" than us, they just hadn't found the answer yet. The idea that a Roman would flee in terror from a power saw and instantly regard us Gods for having one, like happens in time-travel cartoons, is a temporal kind of racism, actually..... once they realized the loud noises were just a consequence of the thing WORKING they'd want to know how to use it like any other kid watching their Dad cut lumber with one would and by the end of the first day would be able to work along side you building the deck with no issue, just like Junior.

People are people.

Bob seems to think modern people, at least the ones he supports, are somehow evolutionary superiors and are born just knowing stuff, and not the beneficiaries of 2,000 years of humanity passing along notes.....
He does, because he believes that the intelligent never have to work for their knowledge because in cartoons, they always magically know that shit. If Homer Simpson can get a crayon removed from his brain and immediately be able to disprove the existence of God, then clearly Robert Chipman must be an unparalleled genius who knows absolutely everything.

This is also why he believes he's smarter than our ancestors, because if anyone back then had actually been intelligent, they would have worked out our current technologies back then. Antonius Stark would have built rifles in a cave with a box of scraps and used them to help the Roman Empire conquer the world. That they didn't has nothing to do with a lack of technological progress required to create advancements, the inability to access raw materials, or the fact that there was just no need for 4K players back then, clearly they were just a bunch of idiots. And Bob could have easily ruled over them, in his idiotic mind.
 
Those are worthy goals. However can we say Bob hasn't had any comeuppance? He's been fired, lost plenty of opportunities, and is now back living with his mother. The only things left are losing his twitter feed, youtube channel, and getting fired by MatPat.

True ... I suppose I'm waiting for something to wipe the smug off his face, something that has him actually groveling, a Twitter meltdown the likes of which we've never seen.

Eh, I might as well be waiting for him to croak.
 
True ... I suppose I'm waiting for something to wipe the smug off his face, something that has him actually groveling, a Twitter meltdown the likes of which we've never seen.

Eh, I might as well be waiting for him to croak.
Losing the blue check is probably the most serious punishment he could actually get. Stuff like his job for MattPat would go away since he'd be even more of a nobody and he'd be reduced to constantly making new accounts if he doesn't tone it down. He'd just be yet another angry white political sperg on Twitter who'd never be able to reclaim his former "glory"
 
I'm absolutely surprised that nobody's turned Moviebob's face into that of the NPC meme.




"KiwiFarms is trending [...] As you should know [...] the people on that site will come for you [...] study you [...] Invent a narrative..."

Yes. From what I've seen on KiwiFarms, they've invented a "narrative" against Moviebob after spending countless hours on Twitter carefully--and accurately--observing and analyzing Moviebob's behavior. Put simply, KiwiFarms is holding Moviebob accountable for its actions because The Escapist (after Russ Pitts' re-acquisition in a few years ago), ScrewAttack, Geek.com, and The Film Theorists never have.



Corporate drone Moviebob gets called out. Moviebob reverts defelction as its only natural response (decensored):
View attachment 3624932
Here's my question: Given Moviebob lives in a "basement apartment", does Bob's kitchen even receive the sunlight necessary to grow tomatoes that are any larger than raisins?
given that bob now lives with Mommy Dearest, whose kitchen is presumably above ground, I guess she'd let him? I don't think there's an actual separate suite (with kitchen) in the basement of that house.

But yeah, with basement hovel, I seriously doubt he could have grown tomatoes without a sun-lamp.
"They're goal is white supremacy, transphobia and rape-culture."

Not a single one of these is one of my goals. Actually, I'm opposed to all three and other things like cult religions, totalitarianism and fascism, which is why I prefer the company of the Kiwi Farms to Blue Check Twitter.

To repurpose a William F. Buckley quote: I would rather be governed by the top 2000 faggots on this website than the 2000 most active corporate-media-state ballwashers of Blue Check Twitter.
A-freaking-men.

Just because we don't want LITERAL CHILDREN to be irreversably altered/sterilized at a time when their brains aren't developed enough to grasp the full consequences of what it is they believe that they want, only to regret it 20+ years on, doesn't mean we're fucking transphobes.
My goal is high-octane shitposting

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

FLY THE BANNER

Also, tomatoes last about a week in cold storage, at least in any condition you'd want to eat them in. "Fresh" implies they just came off the vine and have NOT been through any kind of preservation/storage. No surprise he doesn't understand the concept of "Fresh" produce. Probably thinks that a can of tomato paste is "Fresh tomatoes" if he JUST opened the can.


And what's with the toilet comment? Is he saying we somehow get our fertilizer from them like spreading the cow manure around? Toilet waste goes directly to the sewer or septic system, it's not and open system to feed your own garden plants, at least I hope to GOD Bob's isn't.

Again, he's so quick to assert nonexistent superior intellect that he trips over his own clownshoes and blames it on "the stupids" of Middle America.
OH god here bob goes, triggering my autism again. "WE" invented flush toilets? NO, Bob, "WE" fucking DIDN'T. Bob didn't. Murrica didn't.

You know who came up with the first fucking flush toilets?
The Minoans on the island of Crete, 4000+ YEARS AGO
What about Modern toilets? They were invented in BRITAIN/Scotland. Sir Harington, courtier to Elizabeth I, invented the first modern flush toilet. Scottish inventor Alexander Cumming got the first patent for a flush toilet (with S-shape pipe) in 1775. In the late 19th century (1800s) London plumber Thomas Crapper maufactured the most widely successful flush toilets, and invented the ballcock device that facilitates the precise refill of the upper tank after flushing.

And no, 'murricans didn't invent Cold Storage. The natives of North America had ways of cold storage, boxes of things immersed in lakes and rivers to keep them cold, for example. But who had em all beat were the ancient Persians, who invented Yakhchals, "Ice pits" which had insulated conical hollow buildings over them where they stored food such as meat and dairy products.
 
given that bob now lives with Mommy Dearest, whose kitchen is presumably above ground, I guess she'd let him? I don't think there's an actual separate suite (with kitchen) in the basement of that house.

But yeah, with basement hovel, I seriously doubt he could have grown tomatoes without a sun-lamp.

A-freaking-men.

Just because we don't want LITERAL CHILDREN to be irreversably altered/sterilized at a time when their brains aren't developed enough to grasp the full consequences of what it is they believe that they want, only to regret it 20+ years on, doesn't mean we're fucking transphobes.

OH god here bob goes, triggering my autism again. "WE" invented flush toilets? NO, Bob, "WE" fucking DIDN'T. Bob didn't. Murrica didn't.

You know who came up with the first fucking flush toilets?
The Minoans on the island of Crete, 4000+ YEARS AGO
What about Modern toilets? They were invented in BRITAIN/Scotland. Sir Harington, courtier to Elizabeth I, invented the first modern flush toilet. Scottish inventor Alexander Cumming got the first patent for a flush toilet (with S-shape pipe) in 1775. In the late 19th century (1800s) London plumber Thomas Crapper maufactured the most widely successful flush toilets, and invented the ballcock device that facilitates the precise refill of the upper tank after flushing.

And no, 'murricans didn't invent Cold Storage. The natives of North America had ways of cold storage, boxes of things immersed in lakes and rivers to keep them cold, for example. But who had em all beat were the ancient Persians, who invented Yakhchals, "Ice pits" which had insulated conical hollow buildings over them where they stored food such as meat and dairy products.
No surprise that Bob doesn't know history.
 
Corporate drone Moviebob gets called out. Moviebob reverts defelction as its only natural response (decensored):
View attachment 3624932
Here's my question: Given Moviebob lives in a "basement apartment", does Bob's kitchen even receive the sunlight necessary to grow tomatoes that are any larger than raisins?
I almost want an apocalyptic event to blow us back into the dark ages just to test Bob's ability to grow his own food. We know a healthy frame like his only needs a relatively small amount of food to function, so it should be easy for one so wise to survive on homegrown foods alone.

Also Bob has (I suspect deliberately) missed the point here. Growing the food wasn't the focus, it was the struggles people went through to live freely and own something fulfilling. A Roman earned his farm, he fought and bled for it and was rewarded with something that was his. Bob has no capacity to understand that. He's a perpetual manbaby who cannot escape his mother's basement. He's never struggled for anything, never had to put work and effort towards something bigger than himself. As such, he'll never be rewarded for it. He'll live and die in mediocrity and obscurity and the only people that will pay attention to his life's work will, ironically, be people like us.

Bob has dedicated himself to a mega-corporation that pumps out entertainment on a factory line. A corporation that doesn't care he exists, will never acknowledge him past a fleeting tweet (if he's lucky) and he will receive nothing in return for his loyalty. You contribute nothing to the powers you worship Bob, they will give you nothing. The sad thing is you are content with that. You are wasting your life, and will receive no farm, nothing that you will be able to truly call yours. You will not reap the rewards of hard work or a fulfilling life, because those things are alien to you. Keep your pithy Twitter dunks, it's all you are and all you will be.

True ... I suppose I'm waiting for something to wipe the smug off his face, something that has him actually groveling, a Twitter meltdown the likes of which we've never seen.

Eh, I might as well be waiting for him to croak.
As much as I long for the day, I don't think it'll ever happen. If the Lindsay Ellis debacle didn't break him I don't think anything will.
 
I almost want an apocalyptic event to blow us back into the dark ages just to test Bob's ability to grow his own food. We know a healthy frame like his only needs a relatively small amount of food to function, so it should be easy for one so wise to survive on homegrown foods alone.
Don't even need to do that. Just dare him to actually attempt to grow a tomato plant in his kitchen and chronicle it. He'd refuse because we all know he has no idea how to do it and no idea how to figure out how to do it.
 
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