Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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Bear with me for one moment, because I swear this is actually relevant.

There's an old TV sitcom called Family Ties where they had the basic setup of a smart boy named Alec who had a dumb sister named Mallorie. At one point, Mallorie had the line "My boyfriend and I are so in sync. It's like we have one mind between us."

Alec heard, and there was a long delay before he said "Who is using it today?" The reason, of course, is because that wasn't the funny part of the joke. The funny part of the joke was watching Alec contemplate the straight line, as though he couldn't quite believe Mallorie was dumb enough to offer him something so blatant, so obvious.

A few years ago, some actual grownups came up with the title Star Trek: Discovery. And they were probably blindsided when people immediately called it "STD." But what sort of mental giant could have predicted that?! The answer is "Any twelve year old of normal intelligence."

And then there is the grotesque cone of flesh here, who calls himself "MovieBob." More like MovieBlob, amirite?

We have people so objectively stupid their minds work on the level of a straight-man dumbie dumb dumb from a 1980s sitcom. Not only do they say stupid things, the stupid things they say are so stupid you can't quite believe it was meant sincerely. You try to come up with an explanation, but eventually you have to agree: they are, in fact, that stupid.

Serious question: is this a thing with a name?
 
And then there is the grotesque cone of flesh here, who calls himself "MovieBob." More like MovieBlob, amirite?

The amazing thing is that it would be an obvious joke even if Bob were rail-thin: a blob devoid of culture, of taste, of experience. Just another consoomer. That Bob is so fat with a horrifically swollen head (literal and figurative) is just mind-boggling ... especially since, according to his own reactions to the nickname, he's been called Blob before.

But then this is the guy who admonished his watchers to "do it up" and hit the gym while looking like a hypertensive walrus, so yes, the depth of his stupidity and lack of self-awareness is truly awe-inspiring.
 
The amazing thing is that it would be an obvious joke even if Bob were rail-thin: a blob devoid of culture, of taste, of experience. Just another consoomer. That Bob is so fat with a horrifically swollen head (literal and figurative) is just mind-boggling ... especially since, according to his own reactions to the nickname, he's been called Blob before.

I am still amazed when this happens.

Apparently, nobody said "Maybe we should call it Star Trek Challenger." And Bob never thought of using one of the ... Jesus, there is a web page with the title "89 Fantastic Nicknames for Robert." Even if we drop 80% of them, that's 17 options.

EDIT TO ADD:
Better, Star Trek Endeavor. Which has the benefit of being a near-synonym with "Enterprise."
 
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Bear with me for one moment, because I swear this is actually relevant.

There's an old TV sitcom called Family Ties where they had the basic setup of a smart boy named Alec who had a dumb sister named Mallorie. At one point, Mallorie had the line "My boyfriend and I are so in sync. It's like we have one mind between us."

Alec heard, and there was a long delay before he said "Who is using it today?" The reason, of course, is because that wasn't the funny part of the joke. The funny part of the joke was watching Alec contemplate the straight line, as though he couldn't quite believe Mallorie was dumb enough to offer him something so blatant, so obvious.

A few years ago, some actual grownups came up with the title Star Trek: Discovery. And they were probably blindsided when people immediately called it "STD." But what sort of mental giant could have predicted that?! The answer is "Any twelve year old of normal intelligence."

And then there is the grotesque cone of flesh here, who calls himself "MovieBob." More like MovieBlob, amirite?

We have people so objectively stupid their minds work on the level of a straight-man dumbie dumb dumb from a 1980s sitcom. Not only do they say stupid things, the stupid things they say are so stupid you can't quite believe it was meant sincerely. You try to come up with an explanation, but eventually you have to agree: they are, in fact, that stupid.

Serious question: is this a thing with a name?
I remember when I was a lee wad, I asked my dad (who was already really annoyed about something at the time) if there really were people in the real world as dumb as Johnny Bravo. (which shows you I'm a 90s kid. If I were a boomer, I would've said something like "the three stooges") and my father looks me straight in the eye without a moment of hesitation and says in a very dead-pan, serious tone "Yes, there are. In fact a lot of people are even stupider." Not joking or anything, that was a dead serious answer. And he was right.

As much as we'd like to believe that extremely stupid people (note: stupid, not mentally disabled. There's a difference.) are just silly fiction, the sad truth is they're very real. There really are people so monumentally dumb that they'll set themselves up for obvious jokes, or make a catastrophic avoidable mistake and be shocked things went wrong. There are people with no self-awareness or insight, no foresight, and no intellectual curiosity. The people who write stories about idiots are channeling a real life phenomenon.

There's usually a crossover with narcissism too, ala Dunning-Kruger effect. So you end up with people who are such idiots their stupidity amazes the average person, but they're also so psychopathicly self-absorbed they practically worship themselves as gods. That's how you get Bob Chipman!
 
I wonder if Bob has a 'thing' for wimmin in uniform.
Didn't he say that he liked watching Ilsa, She-Wolf of the SS before?
Agreed. If a celebrity, let's say, Lindsay Ellis, didn't like Blob, that celebrity would show it.
Big corporations dictating government policy is literally oligarchy.
Let's be real and say that Blob's grudge against Greenwald is based off the fact that Greenwald disrespected Saint Hillary.
 
If you can tell me which are the "best bits", I'm happy to listen. The problems are 1) I know nothing about pop culture, so if I were to decide which are the "best bits" I'll just skip everything about capeshit, Hollywood, and cartoons. 2) I don't read minds and I can't predict how people react; tweets I thought of as inconsequential -- like the King Arthur tweets a few weeks ago -- have given rise to pages and pages of discussion, while the converse -- tweets I think of as "hot" but are ignored -- also occurs regularly. Such experience has taught me to be humble and guard me against making things about myself.

I'm sorry I've wasted your time; although it is not my fault that Bobby, Chris, and their hangers-on have not been consistently entertaining. I hope other people have found my posts worthwhile.

I for one greatly appreciate your dedication to documenting Bob's stupidity. I can't stand the moron himself, let alone browse his twitter without closing the tab in disgust. So thank you very much for your service.

If I can give my 2 cents: my favourite tweets are the ones where he gets a response. Not necesarily a dunk, just a measured response where they guy calls him an imbecile indirectly. It happened a few times where he didn't expect anyone to reply and somebody straight up body slams him to the ground. The ones that I don't even bother reading? Where his fans call him a genius. I die a little from the second hand embarrasment.
 
I for one greatly appreciate your dedication to documenting Bob's stupidity. I can't stand the moron himself, let alone browse his twitter without closing the tab in disgust. So thank you very much for your service.

If I can give my 2 cents: my favourite tweets are the ones where he gets a response. Not necesarily a dunk, just a measured response where they guy calls him an imbecile indirectly. It happened a few times where he didn't expect anyone to reply and somebody straight up body slams him to the ground. The ones that I don't even bother reading? Where his fans call him a genius. I die a little from the second hand embarrasment.
Some of the best owns are when his own fans politely point out or question what he says and he has no way to save face. He can't even whine about da dang dirty trolls because its people who like him pointing out when he's embarrassingly wrong.
 
Some of the best owns are when his own fans politely point out or question what he says and he has no way to save face. He can't even whine about da dang dirty trolls because its people who like him pointing out when he's embarrassingly wrong.
When he does it, he ignores it if it's from a man and follows it obesquiously if it's from a woman.
 
the best blobbo twits are when he reveals how much of a white trash inbred retard hick he really is: his cooking, when he, in his damaged brain, try to act like a tough and suave dude, etc
blobbo opinions on everysingle topic he talks about are like him: retarded
For me, it's when he tries to give his opinion on politics.

Maybe it's just because I'm a politisperg at heart, but watching him declare that nobody will do business in states that pass pro-life laws or that AOC is secretly a neoliberal who will crush all opposition with her cleavage, which Bob might get within 10 feet of someday, right? will never not be funny to me.
 
Some translate this idiot please.
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Some translate this idiot please.
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I think I am kinda in the same boat as him with this. It's so on the nose it feels like parody, but it's not good parody so maybe it's legitimate? I don't know if this is someone's attempt to "troll" white men with bait, if it's some strawman creation to make fun of woke people, if it's actually something made unironically by a woke person or an attempt at humor by a woke person. The image makes me feel nothing.

He is also trying to save face by implying he likes these movies for valid reasons unlike the other white men.
 
Some translate this idiot please.
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Most of those characters are not depicted as heroes, but as anti-heroes or passionate and dedicated men with huge character flaws (which make for good storytelling.)

And fuck, even when they are unapologetic heroes like Dutch, John McClain and Roddy Piper (They Live didn't give him a name) the are depicted as some of the most progressive characters to ever be on cinema. In Dutch's case, he's smart, sensible, perceptive, and very open minded (as you can see by the fact that his unit is incredibly racially diverse, and everybody took charge at different times during the movie, while he took a back seat to assess the situation, which display his natural leadership skills.)

I don't care what color or sex you are, if you don't wanna be like Dutch, you are a faggot.
 
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