- Joined
- Nov 10, 2015
You better put out for this @OwO What's This?
Roommate Horror Stories - Because we've all had that one roommate
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fire_fly
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2015
BOY OH BOY my luck hasn't been as bad as some of y'all but I had some shitty roommates and I love being able to talk about them. These are all from a 2-year period in a student apartment complex.
Like I recognize that I'm not the greatest person to live with. I'm forgetful and kind of messy and I set up silly rules like "don't let strangers sleep here overnight" and "don't smoke weed on the porch, there's a cop living in that apartment right across the way". But I hope someone would set my shit straight before I started acting like these people.
The first girls that moved into the apartment with me were the worst. Both of them were slutty, which is fine, I don't care about what other people do. But they were just so fucking gross about it... I don't need to know that the one girl's boyfriend's dick has a weird shape, or that the other one's boyfriend's taint smelled like cheese. I don't want to hear about how the glaze on that cinnamon bun I'm eating looks like jizz but probably doesn't taste as good. And I certainly don't need to have my roommate come home with her boyfriend, lock eyes with me as I'm sitting in the living room painting, and then take him into the next room and fuck him as loudly as she possibly can. Nor do I feel like I should have to deal with some idiot getting a cat that she clearly doesn't actually give a shit about, despite me telling her repeatedly that I'm extremely allergic and to please not get a cat.
They also routinely stole food from me, to the point where I invested in a mini-fridge and a plastic tote for dry goods. I had a hard time getting money for bills from either of them and I was the only one without a job at the time. Oh, and one of them- the one who was dating Mr. Cheese Taint- turned out to have been living there illegally. As in, violating a fucking restraining order. So the maintenance guys found her there one day, told the office, and she got kicked out. Which she decided must have been my fault somehow, because she and Mr. Cheese Taint, who was a white supremacist that stockpiled guns, started prank calling me. I got all these nasty calls that would just be this nutcase telling me he wanted to cum in my eyeballs or something equally disgusting, over and over, throughout that school day and for several days after, even on Christmas. One voicemail was just the sound of him jerking off. I ended up changing my number.
Another girl I lived with got a puppy that died of parvo, and then she immediately got another one that she neglected constantly... One night, she went to some dude's apartment and left her puppy in the bathroom because he wasn't house-trained yet and she wanted minimal cleanup. He was crying and freaking out all night, but she'd locked the door to her room and I couldn't get to him so someone would actually, like, take care of him for fucking once until she got back. This was one of the more upsetting incidents, and me freaking out on her when she got home eventually led to her moving out.
Last notable shitty situation isn't that bad on its surface. This one girl was a neat-freak when it came to other people's stuff, but she'd do shit like leave a casserole dish to soak for an entire week. Her excuse being that she was in school and she'd forget things sometimes but guess what? So was I. I came home late one night from taking a mock state board exam, and she'd packed up all my art supplies- I had already been keeping all of it neatly set up by the TV stand in a plastic tote and little rotating cart because there wasn't enough space in my closet-sized room thanks to the mini fridge- along with a bunch of shit that wasn't even mine in these massive cardboard boxes with a little passive-aggressive note that said, "You wouldn't clean up your stuff, so we did". She didn't last but a few months, and she went to another apartment.
The bad stuff involving her came later. It's a longer story than I want to type up, but basically I used to hang out with this girl's boyfriend, and I think part of her moving out was because she thought I was trying to steal him or something. It's funny to me because he's 1000% not my type, I just wanted a friend and to maybe sell my guitar to him. But apparently he thought so too because I ran into him and he made a major pass at me, immediately after telling me that he and this girl were moving in together. I told my roommate at the time (who was fucking awesome and I wish I was still in contact with her) about it once I'd managed to shove him out the door, and about twenty minutes later, while we were chatting, he showed back up with a pile of DVDs and asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I slammed the door in his face. A month or so later, I ran into ex-roomie at the mailboxes and I wanted to tell her what a shitbag this guy was but I know she'd never have believed me. Why would she? To her, I was just her fat roommate that was trying to catch her boyfriend's dick. I hope they're not still together, she deserves better than that.
They also routinely stole food from me, to the point where I invested in a mini-fridge and a plastic tote for dry goods. I had a hard time getting money for bills from either of them and I was the only one without a job at the time. Oh, and one of them- the one who was dating Mr. Cheese Taint- turned out to have been living there illegally. As in, violating a fucking restraining order. So the maintenance guys found her there one day, told the office, and she got kicked out. Which she decided must have been my fault somehow, because she and Mr. Cheese Taint, who was a white supremacist that stockpiled guns, started prank calling me. I got all these nasty calls that would just be this nutcase telling me he wanted to cum in my eyeballs or something equally disgusting, over and over, throughout that school day and for several days after, even on Christmas. One voicemail was just the sound of him jerking off. I ended up changing my number.
Another girl I lived with got a puppy that died of parvo, and then she immediately got another one that she neglected constantly... One night, she went to some dude's apartment and left her puppy in the bathroom because he wasn't house-trained yet and she wanted minimal cleanup. He was crying and freaking out all night, but she'd locked the door to her room and I couldn't get to him so someone would actually, like, take care of him for fucking once until she got back. This was one of the more upsetting incidents, and me freaking out on her when she got home eventually led to her moving out.
Last notable shitty situation isn't that bad on its surface. This one girl was a neat-freak when it came to other people's stuff, but she'd do shit like leave a casserole dish to soak for an entire week. Her excuse being that she was in school and she'd forget things sometimes but guess what? So was I. I came home late one night from taking a mock state board exam, and she'd packed up all my art supplies- I had already been keeping all of it neatly set up by the TV stand in a plastic tote and little rotating cart because there wasn't enough space in my closet-sized room thanks to the mini fridge- along with a bunch of shit that wasn't even mine in these massive cardboard boxes with a little passive-aggressive note that said, "You wouldn't clean up your stuff, so we did". She didn't last but a few months, and she went to another apartment.
The bad stuff involving her came later. It's a longer story than I want to type up, but basically I used to hang out with this girl's boyfriend, and I think part of her moving out was because she thought I was trying to steal him or something. It's funny to me because he's 1000% not my type, I just wanted a friend and to maybe sell my guitar to him. But apparently he thought so too because I ran into him and he made a major pass at me, immediately after telling me that he and this girl were moving in together. I told my roommate at the time (who was fucking awesome and I wish I was still in contact with her) about it once I'd managed to shove him out the door, and about twenty minutes later, while we were chatting, he showed back up with a pile of DVDs and asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I slammed the door in his face. A month or so later, I ran into ex-roomie at the mailboxes and I wanted to tell her what a shitbag this guy was but I know she'd never have believed me. Why would she? To her, I was just her fat roommate that was trying to catch her boyfriend's dick. I hope they're not still together, she deserves better than that.
Like I recognize that I'm not the greatest person to live with. I'm forgetful and kind of messy and I set up silly rules like "don't let strangers sleep here overnight" and "don't smoke weed on the porch, there's a cop living in that apartment right across the way". But I hope someone would set my shit straight before I started acting like these people.
- Joined
- May 25, 2013
Not impressive story:
Buddy's sister's husband rented properties. I got an offer on renting a place from Husband with Buddy. It was clearly as much getting Buddy out of Sister and Husband's place as anything else. We were supposed to also double as storage for Husband's cool crap including several arcade cabinets and a pinball machine. No such things happened.
Buddy's sister's husband rented properties. I got an offer on renting a place from Husband with Buddy. It was clearly as much getting Buddy out of Sister and Husband's place as anything else. We were supposed to also double as storage for Husband's cool crap including several arcade cabinets and a pinball machine. No such things happened.
- Joined
- Aug 31, 2015
I was locked out of my dorm's bathroom for THREE days while the roommates across were on 'vacation' in the middle of the semester. I had to shower at the gym.
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2014
I only have second hand stories because the only time I had a roommate we didn't see much of each other so there was no drama. And I am lame.
Less intense, a friend of mine shared a room with another student at some university and found out that during academic breaks when my friend was at home, the roommate would sublet my friend's bed out to strangers. Like, one day my friend went to the room and found someone else's stuff in the drawers.
Background: A Norwegian friend of mine told me this when she studied at my home university. She was roomed with two other international students; one from South America (I think Costa Rica) and one from Eastern Europe.
So my friend and the Costa Rican got alone great but the European was a nightmare. At one point she began yelling that she was going to kill the other girls and was just raging over nothing. So my friend and the Costa Rican went to the department in charge of housing and told them the roommate was psycho. Department said they couldn't move the nightmare chick without any proof. So my friend waited. She eventually managed to get a meltdown on video and brought the proof to the department and they said they'd move the troublemaker. Still, my friend slept on another friend's couch for a week or two in another dorm while the eviction was getting on.
So my friend and the Costa Rican got alone great but the European was a nightmare. At one point she began yelling that she was going to kill the other girls and was just raging over nothing. So my friend and the Costa Rican went to the department in charge of housing and told them the roommate was psycho. Department said they couldn't move the nightmare chick without any proof. So my friend waited. She eventually managed to get a meltdown on video and brought the proof to the department and they said they'd move the troublemaker. Still, my friend slept on another friend's couch for a week or two in another dorm while the eviction was getting on.
Less intense, a friend of mine shared a room with another student at some university and found out that during academic breaks when my friend was at home, the roommate would sublet my friend's bed out to strangers. Like, one day my friend went to the room and found someone else's stuff in the drawers.
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2016
my college roomate was a bitch for many reasons, but my point of no return with her was this:
long story short she said I could drink her alcohol that she had sitting in the fridge since the beginning of 1st semester (it was 2nd semester by this point) because she rarely ever drank.
She went home for the weekend, I drank her booze, told her when she got back, and she told me she had plans to drink it.
I paid her more than what it was worth because i felt bad, and she never said thank you, and she never bought more booze.
I used to steal her candy from her room tho so i guess it's only fair
long story short she said I could drink her alcohol that she had sitting in the fridge since the beginning of 1st semester (it was 2nd semester by this point) because she rarely ever drank.
She went home for the weekend, I drank her booze, told her when she got back, and she told me she had plans to drink it.
I paid her more than what it was worth because i felt bad, and she never said thank you, and she never bought more booze.
I used to steal her candy from her room tho so i guess it's only fair
- Joined
- Jun 9, 2016
most of my roommates have been pretty decent. i'm sure at some point i was a poor roommate - i vaguely remember answering a door with a PTRD wearing whitey tighties and a СШ-68, a steel combat helmet from the 1960's. i may or may not have had some liquor.
anyway my roommates, while not terrible had some off-putting qualities (names changed):
1. Aaron worked a rather pungent and "menial", but well paying sanitation job and saw fit to do laundry separately from his other clothing. in the kitchen sink.
2. Benjamin rotated through girls quite frequently. Anne was legitimately psychotic and was committed (they met in a ward...) during the majority of their relationship, by phone and the occasional visit. Beatrice stabbed him in the leg during sex in a bid to somehow convince him she was serious about their relationship and was wife material. Charlotte had a small (several grams a month) cocaine habit. Desiree was a low-budget escort and very high maintenance. it didn't help that she started propositioning friends and family for money in exchange for sex. Eileen was a meth junkie and regularly stole things, and was pinched when she tried to carjack a parked car from a driveway. Francine was actually quite a friendly person. she also had some sort of desperate compulsive disorder (?) that got her deeply involved in interpersonal drama; complete with trying to hook up with friend's SO' and stealing small things or having drunk pity sex from random men (and some women) then going on miserable crying jags for days on end. eventually Ben decided (?) he was bi and is now in a wonderful relationship with Gerald, an illegal Canadian immigrant that overstayed a student VISA and is paying his way by selling weed.
2. Carlos could never keep a job longer than a couple weeks at best - the biggest issue was he had no qualifications yet thought very highly of himself. he was usually behind on rent and had to constantly pawn things, steal things to sell or barter with, or lived in near poverty. to this day, i believe he's working at a call center for an ISP and loves his title: Level 2 Support Engineer.
3. David is on dialysis. David also is Type 1 diabetic. David really likes gambling and liquor. this is not a good combination for David. i have had to pick him up at the local horse track or casino because his sugar got too low and he passed out. also he's on welfare.
4. Edward was a mutual friend of myself and Frederic that i lost touch with. turns out he and his dad (a trucker i think) lived a couple blocks away and we caught up. maybe a month or two later (i was a working college student at the time, finishing a degree), i learn that Edward is short on rent because he threw a party during his dad's absence and blew a bunch of money of stupid decisions. i loaned him a significant amount of cash for this purpose. he more or less ducked out with the cash and refused all contact, and his dad vanished as well. his divorcee mother was no help in locating them other than apologizing, and i learn that the money was instead used to partially buy a motorcycle (used one) that he promptly drove without a license and crashed somewhere. since he "got nothing" out of the cash he saw fit to not pay me back. i went to court over it, which he didn't appear at, and then i placed a lien against him, which to this day is unpaid.
anyway, during this time, the events of Frederic were in swing. Edward has more or less vanished by i hear things on occasion about failed bands, selling drugs, doing drugs, running out on pregnant girls, and various bills and debts. still living, likely shacking up with some girl, not working, and either selling drugs or living on welfare. as it goes.
5. Frederic is a dear friend from when i was in high school. he's always been a very liberal pothead stereotype but is a good person otherwise. we both went to the same community college, but when i went to a 4-year, he fell in with Edward (above) and with various communities online which not only deepened his liberal politics, but also got him into a lot of game design stuff. he left community college to go to some for-profit college, bought a car, and when his mother died and left him some cash, he spent it mostly on tuition and his friends and on stupid shit instead of being productive with it. his courses never went anywhere and was a complete waste of time. all the money ran out, and he moved in with me for a while. he was fine while we lived together apart from the weed, the constant political stuff, and his fixation on making a name for himself in video games (with no programming knowledge or modelling, or animation, or scripting, et c ). he did keep a job for quite a while though, but blew the money on various vices. after i moved him my own home, and he moved into a basement, he confessed that he kept knowledge of Edward from me like where he was or his particulars because Edward was effectively paying for Frederic's food and board with drug money and he didn't want to risk that. hard to fault him when he was otherwise homeless.
Frederic eventually shacked up with a girl, and got a few unstable jobs, but kept nothing, living paycheck to paycheck and constantly borrowing money from me. about $10,000 as of today. i will let my accounts payable text speak for itself below. note that it's been some 7 years now. he's still pushing the videogame design angle, making mods and stuff for GTAV now i think, and getting into arguments at his seasonal jobs (which gets him fired) and more recently has applied for welfare.
$130 partial for car tow fee
$200 back rent owed
$30 borrowed late june 2010
$100 bicycle/pump/rack/lock
$10 GTA
$70 food and BART tickets
$70 tony's laptop AC adapter and battery
$400 rent for december 2010
$100 for comcast bill
$20 airsoft
$960 loaned 6/27/11
$165 bike tire installation
$100 loan for insurance training and gasoline
$120 loan for work boots
$30 Payday 2
$115 gasoline money
$240 misc meals
$2284.25 brakes, alignment, et c for honda 3/4/15
$120 work boots/socks
$150 honda radiator repair
$500 1st mo rent 6/22/15
$45 split crab shack meal 2/12/16
$1000 rent 6/1/16 check #1425
$2250 personal loan to buy 7/20/16
$1450 debt purchase for motorcycle 3/25/16
$800 debt purchase personal loan 3/25/16
------
-$150 payment 2/9/13
-$150 payment 3/9/13
-$150 payment 5/6/13
-$150 payment 4/1/14
-$100 payment 9/8/14
-$30 forgiveness (birthday)
-$200 payment 1/9/15
-$140 payment 4/25/15
bonus fun fact i just remembered: Ben's ex Charlotte was a maid of honor at a mutual friend's wedding. she made out with another friend during the wedding reception (not at the ceremony to be fair) and acquired cocaine in exchange for sex (blowjob for the dealer (another guest) in the venue's restroom)... all while still at the wedding. she then hooked up with yet another friend, a well meaning, but very promiscuous sheriff's deputy, and made enough drunk/drugged up sexually explicit calls to him at all hours to the point he changed his number and ditched his old phone.
anyway my roommates, while not terrible had some off-putting qualities (names changed):
1. Aaron worked a rather pungent and "menial", but well paying sanitation job and saw fit to do laundry separately from his other clothing. in the kitchen sink.
2. Benjamin rotated through girls quite frequently. Anne was legitimately psychotic and was committed (they met in a ward...) during the majority of their relationship, by phone and the occasional visit. Beatrice stabbed him in the leg during sex in a bid to somehow convince him she was serious about their relationship and was wife material. Charlotte had a small (several grams a month) cocaine habit. Desiree was a low-budget escort and very high maintenance. it didn't help that she started propositioning friends and family for money in exchange for sex. Eileen was a meth junkie and regularly stole things, and was pinched when she tried to carjack a parked car from a driveway. Francine was actually quite a friendly person. she also had some sort of desperate compulsive disorder (?) that got her deeply involved in interpersonal drama; complete with trying to hook up with friend's SO' and stealing small things or having drunk pity sex from random men (and some women) then going on miserable crying jags for days on end. eventually Ben decided (?) he was bi and is now in a wonderful relationship with Gerald, an illegal Canadian immigrant that overstayed a student VISA and is paying his way by selling weed.
2. Carlos could never keep a job longer than a couple weeks at best - the biggest issue was he had no qualifications yet thought very highly of himself. he was usually behind on rent and had to constantly pawn things, steal things to sell or barter with, or lived in near poverty. to this day, i believe he's working at a call center for an ISP and loves his title: Level 2 Support Engineer.
3. David is on dialysis. David also is Type 1 diabetic. David really likes gambling and liquor. this is not a good combination for David. i have had to pick him up at the local horse track or casino because his sugar got too low and he passed out. also he's on welfare.
4. Edward was a mutual friend of myself and Frederic that i lost touch with. turns out he and his dad (a trucker i think) lived a couple blocks away and we caught up. maybe a month or two later (i was a working college student at the time, finishing a degree), i learn that Edward is short on rent because he threw a party during his dad's absence and blew a bunch of money of stupid decisions. i loaned him a significant amount of cash for this purpose. he more or less ducked out with the cash and refused all contact, and his dad vanished as well. his divorcee mother was no help in locating them other than apologizing, and i learn that the money was instead used to partially buy a motorcycle (used one) that he promptly drove without a license and crashed somewhere. since he "got nothing" out of the cash he saw fit to not pay me back. i went to court over it, which he didn't appear at, and then i placed a lien against him, which to this day is unpaid.
anyway, during this time, the events of Frederic were in swing. Edward has more or less vanished by i hear things on occasion about failed bands, selling drugs, doing drugs, running out on pregnant girls, and various bills and debts. still living, likely shacking up with some girl, not working, and either selling drugs or living on welfare. as it goes.
5. Frederic is a dear friend from when i was in high school. he's always been a very liberal pothead stereotype but is a good person otherwise. we both went to the same community college, but when i went to a 4-year, he fell in with Edward (above) and with various communities online which not only deepened his liberal politics, but also got him into a lot of game design stuff. he left community college to go to some for-profit college, bought a car, and when his mother died and left him some cash, he spent it mostly on tuition and his friends and on stupid shit instead of being productive with it. his courses never went anywhere and was a complete waste of time. all the money ran out, and he moved in with me for a while. he was fine while we lived together apart from the weed, the constant political stuff, and his fixation on making a name for himself in video games (with no programming knowledge or modelling, or animation, or scripting, et c ). he did keep a job for quite a while though, but blew the money on various vices. after i moved him my own home, and he moved into a basement, he confessed that he kept knowledge of Edward from me like where he was or his particulars because Edward was effectively paying for Frederic's food and board with drug money and he didn't want to risk that. hard to fault him when he was otherwise homeless.
Frederic eventually shacked up with a girl, and got a few unstable jobs, but kept nothing, living paycheck to paycheck and constantly borrowing money from me. about $10,000 as of today. i will let my accounts payable text speak for itself below. note that it's been some 7 years now. he's still pushing the videogame design angle, making mods and stuff for GTAV now i think, and getting into arguments at his seasonal jobs (which gets him fired) and more recently has applied for welfare.
$130 partial for car tow fee
$200 back rent owed
$30 borrowed late june 2010
$100 bicycle/pump/rack/lock
$10 GTA
$70 food and BART tickets
$70 tony's laptop AC adapter and battery
$400 rent for december 2010
$100 for comcast bill
$20 airsoft
$960 loaned 6/27/11
$165 bike tire installation
$100 loan for insurance training and gasoline
$120 loan for work boots
$30 Payday 2
$115 gasoline money
$240 misc meals
$2284.25 brakes, alignment, et c for honda 3/4/15
$120 work boots/socks
$150 honda radiator repair
$500 1st mo rent 6/22/15
$45 split crab shack meal 2/12/16
$1000 rent 6/1/16 check #1425
$2250 personal loan to buy 7/20/16
$1450 debt purchase for motorcycle 3/25/16
$800 debt purchase personal loan 3/25/16
------
-$150 payment 2/9/13
-$150 payment 3/9/13
-$150 payment 5/6/13
-$150 payment 4/1/14
-$100 payment 9/8/14
-$30 forgiveness (birthday)
-$200 payment 1/9/15
-$140 payment 4/25/15
bonus fun fact i just remembered: Ben's ex Charlotte was a maid of honor at a mutual friend's wedding. she made out with another friend during the wedding reception (not at the ceremony to be fair) and acquired cocaine in exchange for sex (blowjob for the dealer (another guest) in the venue's restroom)... all while still at the wedding. she then hooked up with yet another friend, a well meaning, but very promiscuous sheriff's deputy, and made enough drunk/drugged up sexually explicit calls to him at all hours to the point he changed his number and ditched his old phone.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2014
I once shared a very small apartment with a girl who kept inviting random people she'd befriended on Something Awful for open-ended visits. She'd never before met any of them in real life; often, they were only known to her by screen name.
So much obesity. So many odors.
So much obesity. So many odors.
R
RI 360
Guest
kiwifarms.net
Once lived on a small island and had an unemployed (red flag) art student (red flag) for a roommate. When I came to check the place out it was a bit of a mess (dishes piled a mile high in the sink) he explained he didn't clean prior because no one has showed up before. It was a gorgeous apartment so I didn't give a shit and moved in.
He somehow didn't have his own computer so I did him a solid and set up a user account for him on mine with the only condition for use being he had to keep my bedroom door closed because I was allergic to his cat. Did he ever? No. And the cat loved rolling around in my clothes.
I worked long days, sometimes as much as eighteen hours, it was get home sleep and get back out. One night he ate crabs and left the rotting carcasses in an open plastic bag hanging from the stove. I asked him if he was going to take it out before the morning and he said he would. Left for work, it was still in the kitchen. Wound up having to stay overnight at work. Came home on the third day it was still fucking there, took it out myself.
I spent what little free time I had cleaning the dishes I never used but he let sit in the sink to the point of a knot infestation. I asked him why he's incapable of cleaning up after himself and he tried to guilt me with some bullshit about his dad having cancer.
The final straw came when I started noticing I was getting bites all over my legs and side. At first I thought maybe the island was just buggier than the mainland and checked the seals on my windows and screens. I brought it up to him as it got worse he casually mentioned he was getting bit too because the cat got fleas.
He fucking knew the cat had fleas for WEEKS. It took all my restraint to not punch him in the fucking face. The argument that ensued ran the gauntlet from him being an irresponsible pet owner that's letting his animal suffer which was somehow not his fault, to he insisting he's not paying for any damages the cat has done, to him fighting with me over just so much as getting an estimate on an exterminator to him preemptively telling me he won't be paying for my nice leather furniture ,that was about to be moved in, to be reupholstered if his cat ripped it up and he wouldn't so much as even clean the couch if the cat peed on it.
Instead of get arrested for assault I asap moved out. On the final day of me being able to take my bedroom out he ran out of the house and implored me to stay. I told him he was fucking insane and cohabiting with parasites is not fucking normal. That I would have scars for years from the bites. He then lifted up his pant leg to reveal festered bite wounds larger than quarters all over his legs and said it didn't matter because he has them too. It was incredibly disturbing.
More stuff than that happened but from that particular point in time the fleas were the worst.
He somehow didn't have his own computer so I did him a solid and set up a user account for him on mine with the only condition for use being he had to keep my bedroom door closed because I was allergic to his cat. Did he ever? No. And the cat loved rolling around in my clothes.
I worked long days, sometimes as much as eighteen hours, it was get home sleep and get back out. One night he ate crabs and left the rotting carcasses in an open plastic bag hanging from the stove. I asked him if he was going to take it out before the morning and he said he would. Left for work, it was still in the kitchen. Wound up having to stay overnight at work. Came home on the third day it was still fucking there, took it out myself.
I spent what little free time I had cleaning the dishes I never used but he let sit in the sink to the point of a knot infestation. I asked him why he's incapable of cleaning up after himself and he tried to guilt me with some bullshit about his dad having cancer.
The final straw came when I started noticing I was getting bites all over my legs and side. At first I thought maybe the island was just buggier than the mainland and checked the seals on my windows and screens. I brought it up to him as it got worse he casually mentioned he was getting bit too because the cat got fleas.
He fucking knew the cat had fleas for WEEKS. It took all my restraint to not punch him in the fucking face. The argument that ensued ran the gauntlet from him being an irresponsible pet owner that's letting his animal suffer which was somehow not his fault, to he insisting he's not paying for any damages the cat has done, to him fighting with me over just so much as getting an estimate on an exterminator to him preemptively telling me he won't be paying for my nice leather furniture ,that was about to be moved in, to be reupholstered if his cat ripped it up and he wouldn't so much as even clean the couch if the cat peed on it.
Instead of get arrested for assault I asap moved out. On the final day of me being able to take my bedroom out he ran out of the house and implored me to stay. I told him he was fucking insane and cohabiting with parasites is not fucking normal. That I would have scars for years from the bites. He then lifted up his pant leg to reveal festered bite wounds larger than quarters all over his legs and said it didn't matter because he has them too. It was incredibly disturbing.
More stuff than that happened but from that particular point in time the fleas were the worst.
R
RI 360
Guest
kiwifarms.net
lol I have so many stories about retards, when I can I will edit this with the story about my psychotic neighbors who were across the hall from me up until a few months ago.
- Joined
- Jul 5, 2014
moar.
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2017
Here's one of the several stories I have from sophomore year at college. We'll call the guys involved V and T.
I had just gotten back from my lab course and I was about to start studying when I suddenly hear V calling my name in a soft voice. I turn around and notice that his voice is coming from a large lump from under his bed covers. I ask him what's up, and he asks if I could leave the room for awhile. A little irritated, I ask why. This time, a girl answers "just 5 minutes." Needless to say, I get the picture and gtfo to get something to eat.
After I come back, the entire room reeks like a Vietnamese restaurant dumpster. This didn't bother me at first because T was an avid fisherman, and usually when the room smells this bad, it usually means he caught something and we're going to get a bomb fish dinner. T comes into the room and I ask if he went fishing that afternoon since he skipped his classes that day. He tells me that he hasn't fished for a couple weeks. At that moment, I died a little on the inside.
A few weeks later, my roommates fucked with me a little bit and gave my number to the drunken clam at a party. She kept trying to flirt with me, and after stinking up my room with her harbor vag, I can honestly say I've never felt so good shutting someone down emotionally like that in my entire life.
I have more stores on T if you're interested. Probably the most interesting story he told, while brief, is that he stuck a turkey baster full of heroine up his girlfriend's ass because she was going through withdrawal.
I had just gotten back from my lab course and I was about to start studying when I suddenly hear V calling my name in a soft voice. I turn around and notice that his voice is coming from a large lump from under his bed covers. I ask him what's up, and he asks if I could leave the room for awhile. A little irritated, I ask why. This time, a girl answers "just 5 minutes." Needless to say, I get the picture and gtfo to get something to eat.
After I come back, the entire room reeks like a Vietnamese restaurant dumpster. This didn't bother me at first because T was an avid fisherman, and usually when the room smells this bad, it usually means he caught something and we're going to get a bomb fish dinner. T comes into the room and I ask if he went fishing that afternoon since he skipped his classes that day. He tells me that he hasn't fished for a couple weeks. At that moment, I died a little on the inside.
A few weeks later, my roommates fucked with me a little bit and gave my number to the drunken clam at a party. She kept trying to flirt with me, and after stinking up my room with her harbor vag, I can honestly say I've never felt so good shutting someone down emotionally like that in my entire life.
I have more stores on T if you're interested. Probably the most interesting story he told, while brief, is that he stuck a turkey baster full of heroine up his girlfriend's ass because she was going through withdrawal.
- Joined
- Jul 10, 2015
Hoowee, the horror stories I had with my college roommates.
Freshman Year, me and my other roommate had to spend a year with a NEET in training. He had no irl friends, wouldn't talk to either of us, whenever there was a fire drill, he would his bring his laptop outside, only went out for classes and food and would spend every day watching anime and playing vidya. Out of me and my other roommate's friends, nobody liked him. He would also talk and laugh incessantly, even though both of us were trying to sleep. It got to the point where my other roomate got so fed up of waking up to his spergery that he threw a magazine at his head. Instead of acknowledging him, he simply put his headphones back in and went back to sperging. I still see him around. Spoiler: He's still an autismo.
For a brief time, I wound up living with an asshole baseball player who got in on a scholarship despite the fact that literally no one gives a shit about our sports teams. They had the opposite problem of The Weeb where the only thing they watched were sports, usually in their boxer shorts, and punctuated all their sentences with "Bro". They were generally assholes, and whenever I tried to talk to them, they wouldn't listen. Whenever I tried complaining to the RA, she wrote me off with "You can't believe stereotypes" and sat there with her thumb up her ass. It all came to a head when The Baseball Player shoved and almost strangled me for turning off the Packers game when I thought he was asleep. The next day, I sold his sorry ass out to housing and moved to another place. I got my payback. I won't say how only that it involved his PS4 controller and my nether regions. After I left, I moved in with...
My next roommate was a year older than me. The best way I can describe his appearance is the "Sheeeit" meme come to life. Sheeeit's fake feminist girlfriend also lived with us, albeit illegally. Cracks started to show as he constantly bossed me around, but whenever I asked him to help around to house or step out, he'd either shut me down or completely ignore me and make weaves with his girlfriend. This also came to a head when he yelled at me for touching his Xbox and being a mess. I replied that he touched my laptop, my food and left garbage on my desk, which he lamely denied and tried to make me look dumb for bringing up despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. He also threatened to beat me up, said that my friends were no longer invited over and tried to gaslight me by saying that my cleaning supplies were his girlfriend's. After giving him enough rope to hang himself with, I went back to housing, spilled the beans about him and his girlfriend and moved to a different apartment that's not only cleaner, but has guys that can handle problems like adults, and not like dindus with NPD.
But that's not where the story ends.
Sheeeit's girlfriend, clearly unable to take the L, screamed at me in public, calling me a "liar" and a "pussy". As I silently walked away, she screamed "YOU A PUSSY!" at the top of her lungs. Then she went to the RC and said I sexually harassed her. What a feminist. After going down to the RC and explaining what actually happened, she cleared me of any wrongdoing, but put in a restraining order between me and her so this can't happen again.
This still isn't the end of the story.
I hung out with the only other decent person in the apartment a few weeks later. She gave me some updates on the apartment. Despite the fact that she told everyone not to smoke in the house due to her asthma, they ignored her and she called in the RC, leading to them losing housing next semester, and Sheeeit screamed at her about it. Apparently there's no such thing as accepting fault in the hood. She then went on to describe them washing dishes with her laundry detergent, and Sheeeit and his girlfriend getting into an argument. From what I've heard, she cucked him, called him "manipulative", and argued all goddamn night. They hade make up sex the next night.
TL;DR: Bullies lose their power once you find out they're cucks with NPD who can't wash dishes.
But that's not where the story ends.
Sheeeit's girlfriend, clearly unable to take the L, screamed at me in public, calling me a "liar" and a "pussy". As I silently walked away, she screamed "YOU A PUSSY!" at the top of her lungs. Then she went to the RC and said I sexually harassed her. What a feminist. After going down to the RC and explaining what actually happened, she cleared me of any wrongdoing, but put in a restraining order between me and her so this can't happen again.
This still isn't the end of the story.
I hung out with the only other decent person in the apartment a few weeks later. She gave me some updates on the apartment. Despite the fact that she told everyone not to smoke in the house due to her asthma, they ignored her and she called in the RC, leading to them losing housing next semester, and Sheeeit screamed at her about it. Apparently there's no such thing as accepting fault in the hood. She then went on to describe them washing dishes with her laundry detergent, and Sheeeit and his girlfriend getting into an argument. From what I've heard, she cucked him, called him "manipulative", and argued all goddamn night. They hade make up sex the next night.
TL;DR: Bullies lose their power once you find out they're cucks with NPD who can't wash dishes.
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Pixichick
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 10, 2018
once lived in a house with a roomate the girl would constantly steal from me. It started off with her stealing food and escalated to her stealing stuff like jewelry from my room, then WEARING IT IN FRONT OF ME and insisting it was hers. One day I went through the house and took all the toilet paper, Kleenex, towels, etc., I could find and hid them. Then I laced a hot dog with Ex-Lax and left it on the counter. Took her about five minutes to steal and eat the hot dog. Thirty minutes later I saw her emerge from the bathroom (which had no shower, just a toilet and sink) looking like she was on the brink of death. She never mentioned the mysterious lack of toilet paper, and my stuff was never stolen again......
- Joined
- May 18, 2014
One of the guys in the house I shared during my second year of college bore a striking resemblance to J Roc from Trailer Park Boys in looks, mannerisms, and dress right down to the constant "you know what I'm sayin?" I assumed he was actually basing his persona on the character but when I asked him he responded with "da fuck is Trailer Park Boys nigga?" So I guess not.
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2018
There was a time when I went through a series of roommates from Craigslist. I have learned that CL is the worst god damn place to find roommates.
- I had one guy who was too shy to leave his room except for maybe a couple of times he was drunk enough to talk to me. When he moved out I found a whole shit ton of piss-bottles he left in his closet that I had to dispose of. He was too shy to use the bathroom apparently.
- I had another guy who paid 3 months rent up front so I did not do much vetting. Apparently he was kicked out of his fathers house and his father paid his rent because he was a retarded drug addict. I found this out when all of my spoons slowly came up missing and were found burnt up in his room. He also had a bad habit of bringing homeless people from the highway to my house to hang out. I absolutely kicked him out before his lease was up and did not refund him shit.
Those were the worst two. I went through a handful of people within a year though.
- I had one guy who was too shy to leave his room except for maybe a couple of times he was drunk enough to talk to me. When he moved out I found a whole shit ton of piss-bottles he left in his closet that I had to dispose of. He was too shy to use the bathroom apparently.
- I had another guy who paid 3 months rent up front so I did not do much vetting. Apparently he was kicked out of his fathers house and his father paid his rent because he was a retarded drug addict. I found this out when all of my spoons slowly came up missing and were found burnt up in his room. He also had a bad habit of bringing homeless people from the highway to my house to hang out. I absolutely kicked him out before his lease was up and did not refund him shit.
Those were the worst two. I went through a handful of people within a year though.
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2018
Back in college, my first roommate was a guy that weighed 300+ lbs. Dude showered like 3 times the whole semester. Literally sprayed aerosol air freshener around his hair in lieu of showering. Watched hentai and fapped openly while I was trying to sleep. His phone alarm was a high pitched anime girl. The smell in our room was so bad one of our dorm mates complained about it.
It was a trying semester, but I got a room change and my next roommate was super chill.
It was a trying semester, but I got a room change and my next roommate was super chill.
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- Joined
- Apr 17, 2016
Not so much a roomie horrorstory as it is a roomie lulstory:
My first roommate tried to thaw ice off of the front door, during a bad icestorm, with lighterfluid and a hairdryer. It didnt work, but we didn't catch fire. We did, however, have to accept UPS packages and exit the house through one of the front bedroom windows for a week.
My first roommate tried to thaw ice off of the front door, during a bad icestorm, with lighterfluid and a hairdryer. It didnt work, but we didn't catch fire. We did, however, have to accept UPS packages and exit the house through one of the front bedroom windows for a week.
Because frontdoor was still iced shut with no sign of thawing and the backdoor of the house led to a seven-foot privacy-fenced yard that had only one gate; it was nailed shut. 
The fence itself was inside out with the crossboards on the outside of the yard. Over the iced fence, on three sides, it was a five foot drop to the sidewalk 'cuz the city has weird ideas about landscaping a city housing edition on a hill. Roommate picked this house specifically so her two great danes couldn't escape the yard, but could barely peek over the top of the fence to bark at cars or the football games across the road.
The fence itself was inside out with the crossboards on the outside of the yard. Over the iced fence, on three sides, it was a five foot drop to the sidewalk 'cuz the city has weird ideas about landscaping a city housing edition on a hill. Roommate picked this house specifically so her two great danes couldn't escape the yard, but could barely peek over the top of the fence to bark at cars or the football games across the road.
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