Sebastian Daskawicz-Davis / Cart Narcs / Agent Sebastian - I want you in me Cart Narc

[1-800]

lol just drive away

 

[Lady Rackets Ass]

Did a little more digging into his twitter and it's just as painfully unfunny as his jewtube content he has perfectly channeled both a 16 year old edge lord and a creepy coomer and his posts barely get any engagement. I get that he's trying to go for like a shock jock thing but let's just say at least in my opinion it isn't working

This is probably one of his more popular tweets where he photoshopped a winning lottery ticket, as if he doesn't win the lottery every time he isn't shot doing his "job".

https://archive.ph/2023.02.19-084341/https://twitter.com/WoodyProducer/status/1589093823162257409

This is absolutely haram content that he decided to repost because he's a creepy weirdo

Spoiler: Spoiler nsfw haram

https://archive.ph/2023.02.19-085524/https://twitter.com/WoodyProducer/status/1561842971435098112



why would you even repost these? Like even if there was an article about it or something you could just... not

From the part that I scrolled through he has a couple of tweets about his credit score and how desperate he is for a true and honest gf since it doesn't show in the screenshot in case you were wondering his credit score is 817 as of June 23, 2022 apparently https://archive.ph/2023.02.19-091617/https://twitter.com/WoodyProducer/status/1540129729256206336


and it went up to 824 in November of 2022


he may or may not be into squirting and period sex

https://archive.ph/2023.02.19-085225/https://twitter.com/WoodyProducer/status/1571479591054712834

https://archive.ph/2023.02.19-091220/https://twitter.com/WoodyProducer/status/1544518406610817024

Bonus video!
In this video Sebastian runs into some flavor of SovCit and douchebro comes in at the end with the assist timestamp of guy showing up to dp https://youtu.be/yBHHDflnpVc?t=471
Seems like Sebastian was only interested in messing with the guy until he had someone validate his gay little crusade.

 

[I've Seen Some More Shit]

Getting this aggressively angry over a lolcow is some real shit. All you're doing is stressing out over a faggot you'll never meet, just laugh at him and move on, don't let retards upset you or you'll be seething your entire life.

That being said I do think he's a bit obnoxious as cart-wrangling is one of the most popular means of tard-employment in urban centers and it's nice to give them something to do that isn't just watching trains or old DVD commercials over and over. There's a few Farms staples who probably would've been better if they were distracted with a cart-wrangling job for their adult lives. So long as the carts aren't in the way of cars and parking spots I don't see any reason to give much of a shit.

On the other hand, seeing people who aren't me being harassed by a sperg like this because they didn't expect a weirdo-ambush because they didn't take 10 seconds to put a cart away is funny. Especially with all the fucking props he seems to keep on hand.

 

[WolfeTone]

This nigger is an absolute lolcow, the fresh meat in the thread are just green. They actually think Kiwi Farms goes out and harrows lolcows in the street for content and not just catalogs/archives what they, in full confidence, churn out themselves. The autistic noises, the demanding/demeaning attitude, complete self-seriousness doing the most useless job possible. Will be great to keep an eye on. Stay focused OP, this is a quintessential lolcow, thinks they're God's gift to the earth, never shuts up, runs around parking lots where people and their children are, probably scaring everyone, likely has a stimulant addiction, and criminally harasses people at their property(their cars). I really hate this piece of shit and hope that he ends up in too deep shit for his helicopter psychopath mother Karen to get him out of. A perfect example of a fatherless "man" who needs a reality check.

Also, this isn't even his original idea, it's just the safest version of something people actually do, which is citizen justice in the face of lacking services, like Stop A Douchebag, who prevent people from driving down sidewalks to skip traffic, often risking their lives in the process.

https://www.youtube.com/@StopaDouchebag

 

[jertzog]

Oh, this guy. I started leaving carts out sometimes because I find him that obnoxious.
Too bad this thread will be snowed under with debates on the """ethics""" of returning shopping carts. For the record, it's less important after he started making videos, and even less important when supermarket wageys started policing masks and vax passports. The new metric now is whether you return free weights.

 

[Forkknifegaymer]

Holy shit new favorite YouTuber???

 

[Lady Rackets Ass]

Sebastian dropped a new video

Some highlights:
1. A guy has a dog in his car https://youtu.be/TITSYb-5_Zo?t=233 Sebastian copes about how he would totally take some bites from a pitbull but he's worried about the dog. Nope you're just a little bitch.

2. He gets really mad that some guy smiled at him and spends the next couple of minutes malding over it when the guy takes his magnet off and drives off he tells Sebastian to get a life https://youtu.be/TITSYb-5_Zo?t=500 and then the autist talks to himself about how he wishes he didn't have to do this. You don't have to do this you autistic faggot literally no one asked you to.

3. The autist also has an obsession with litter and he wants big brother to catch all the bottle pissers https://youtu.be/TITSYb-5_Zo?t=534 what a bizzare thing to focus on

He talks to himself a lot in this video his quest for a boyfriend free girl must not be going so well.

 

[WolfeTone]

3. The autist also has an obsession with litter and he wants big brother to catch all the bottle pissers https://youtu.be/TITSYb-5_Zo?t=534 what a bizzare thing to focus on

It's the way of the road Bubs

 

[Lady Rackets Ass]

Another short post Sebastian apparently has an autistic Texan alter ego called Agent Cordell. He tries to put on an atrocious southern accent. At several points you can see from his shadow that he is wearing a cowboy hat https://youtu.be/9LktMApjFSQ?t=316 and instead of his usual dildo that he waves around he has an American flag, which is not only autistic but pretty disrespectful. I don't think he ever shows his feet/legs but I'd be willing to bet he is wearing jeans and cowboy boots too. Can you imagine you're shopping and a faggot dressed like that comes up to you and starts harassing you? I would think he was looking for donations for the local fag parade.

 

[Mister Mint]

I've got a coworker that loves this guy. Every time he describes one of his videos I think "That guy sounds fucking insufferable."
I see I was correct.

 

[Null]

this entire thread is just people arguing about carts so instead of trying to moderate it i am moving it directly to mass debates and featuring it to decide once and for all if cart narcing is based or unbased.

 

[ItCouldBeWorse]

I never expected to see a thread about fucking shopping carts on my frontpage.
But hey, Kiwi is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get. That's what makes it fun after all.

 

[A-Stump]

All you need to get a thread featured is be a lazy nigger faggot?

 

[Dill]

sounds like OP has the case of lazy bones and doesnt put his cart in the right place

 

[NIGGO KILLA]

Not all heros wear capes

Sometimes they push shopping karts

 

[William Tyndale]

Kek it’s wild to see a guy I follow on here. I’m a huge fan and I encourage anyone here to watch his most popular video “I’m a fat a-hole”. It’s pure comedy.

 

[Lasersuit Larry]

I don't personally find worthy of ridicule because parking around carts is annoying, but running into a thread about a prolifically dramatic person, which is what the dude is, to drop your pants and shit out 'NOT A COW' is pretty cowish in itself.

 

[Freya]

I like how every post in this thread has an equal amount of positive and negative ratings

 

[Burd Turglar]

OP sounds like they're a lazy bones with a guilty conscious.

 

[Paul Atreides]

I'm sure I know the answer, but do you shit on public restroom floors because there's a nigger or beaner to clean it up?