Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

Note: I originally wrote this post about three years ago in the Personal Lolcows thread, so if it seems a little familiar that's why.

The final high school principal I had had some odd ideas about school spirit. I only attended one high school, but in four years I had three different principals. The first once lasted through my freshman year but left during the summer break. I have no idea how long he'd been at my school before then. The second one made it through my entire sophomore year, but left halfway through my junior year. I don't know if she was fired, transferred, or just quit but either way after Christmas our new principal was Mr. Purple.

So one day late in the year we were herded into the auditorium for an assembly headed by Mr. Purple personally. So what did he have to tell us that was so important he had to cut every class short for a day? To yell at everyone for wearing black. According to Mr. Purple by wearing black we're insulting the school and all it's staff as well as the sport teams and cheerleaders. He then proceeded to whine about how at his previous school(s) everybody wore the school colors "all the time" but he hadn't witnessed that here. Probably because our colors were mustard yellow and forest green.

I didn't even think there was a high percentage of students wearing black on a daily basis. Sure we had the goth and emo groups, but that was a total of 50 kids at the most. I'd be shocked if there were 100 people wearing black every day, even with a student body near/over 1000. Even 70 seems like a stretch.

So yeah, Mr. Purple managed to yell at the school for about an hour over black. And for all his bitching about black he didn't bother to change the alternative uniforms for the teams/cheerleaders, which were predominately black.

Incidentally Mr. Purple isn't just my name for him, it's what everyone referred to him as in private. He earned this nickname the first few weeks at my school, when someone who didn't know his name yet called him Mr. Purple because of a tie he wore that day. Mr. Purple lost his shit and gave the guy detention. As you can see colors were kind of an issue for him for some reason.
 
  • Winner
  • Like
Reactions: The Littlest Shitlord, Broseph, UnsufficentBoobage and 4 others
I present, the Spanish teacher from Hell

She treated us like actual children in an elementary school. We were not to even get up from our desks to sharpen a fucking pencil without her permission. We could not speak in the classroom unless spoken to, even if the bell had not yet rung. Electronics were disallowed, even before the bell, which was extreme, even for a so-called "phone Nazi". She looked down on all of us because we grew up "privileged" in her mind - she grew up as a dirt poor adoptee living in a foster home with seven other dirt poor adoptees whose birthparents were all crack addicts - and she would do the most retarded shit just to fuck with people. Like she'd be walking around the room, and see a guy working on his assignment in pen - almost finished, mind you- and stop everyone to tell us not to use pen on this one assignment in particular just so that guy would have to start over. She also had this one little favorite that sat behind me that was dumb as shit - couldn't tell her ass from her elbow, but she made an A because she kissed ass. The bitch would always hold up Little Miss Sunshine as the gleaming spectacle of what her students should be.

The final project was the biggest snafu of the whole thing. First, it was going to be a foldable containing every vocabulary word we'd learned over the semester. Simple enough. Everyone starts, and then we find out we can't use blue as the top color. Those who used blue as their top color must restart. This is one day into the project. Two days in, there's a new development. The teacher won tickets to a Beyonce concert, so the due date will be moved back one school day. On the fourth day, it is revealed that at midnight the previous night the assignment was changed to a children's book. Written entirely in Spanish. 200 words. Illustrated. Same due date: that Monday. Today is Thursday. Fuck you. This causes what I can only describe as a revolt in the classroom. We spent the whole period airing our grievances to the teacher from hell. She did not listen.

As a final act of protest, many of us refused to complete the final assignment, myself included. This actually worked out in our favor. The bitch was required to have a traditional final since 80% of her class had incomplete grades the week before finals were given. In the end, I got my spanish credit, and that was all I really cared about.

MysticMisty said:
So one day late in the year we were herded into the auditorium for an assembly headed by Mr. Purple personally. So what did he have to tell us that was so important he had to cut every class short for a day? To yell at everyone for wearing black. According to Mr. Purple by wearing black we're insulting the school and all it's staff as well as the sport teams and cheerleaders. He then proceeded to whine about how at his previous school(s) everybody wore the school colors "all the time" but he hadn't witnessed that here. Probably because our colors were mustard yellow and forest green.
Click to expand...
what if school color is black?
 
  • Like
Reactions: UnsufficentBoobage, Kari Kamiya and MerriedxReldnahc
My old music teacher got busted (several years after I left) for feeling up boys during the private music lessons he would hold after school. He also had a sizeable stash of CP. Apparently he'd had his way with nearly a hundred kids including several of my classmates.

Thing is, I had dozens of after-school music lessons with him. He never laid a finger on me. In fact I got the impression he hated my guts.

These are the advantages of being a fat, zitty social reject. Not even the pedos want anything to do with you. I don't know whether to be relieved or insulted.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Tropical Cock Man, Pee Cola, ShittyRecolor and 8 others
When I was in middle school the assistant principle and I had multiple encounters. Basically, I wouldn't allow the school to punish me. If I received detention, I would go home at the end of the day instead. When it was escalated to ISS, I would skip school. If I was suspended, I would sleep in and eat nachos all day and treat it like a well deserved day off. Needless to say this power hungry bitch hated my guts.

Before I entered high school the principle retired. On my first day as a freshman I was greeted at the door by my old nemesis who had been promoted to principle at the high school. I about shit myself. Within the first week I was dragged into the office at least three times over shit I had nothing to do with. She actually did this to several kids. One day at lunch she was walking through the cafeteria and a fight broke out. She immediately jumped in between the two kids who were fighting. The one kid who seemed to make it his job to get in fights took a step back, realized this bitch was in the way, and just socked her right in the face. She went limp, hit the floor, and the fight continued. I never saw her, or the kid who punched her again.

I was told she was allowed to retire early with full benefits and a really nice pension. I'm sure the kid was expelled. I don't think he was arrested. It was the early/mid 90s and times were quite different.
 
  • Winner
Reactions: Coldgrip, Pee Cola, Broseph and 6 others
Molester Stallone said:
When I was in middle school the assistant principle and I had multiple encounters. Basically, I wouldn't allow the school to punish me. If I received detention, I would go home at the end of the day instead. When it was escalated to ISS, I would skip school. If I was suspended, I would sleep in and eat nachos all day and treat it like a well deserved day off. Needless to say this power hungry bitch hated my guts.

Before I entered high school the principle retired. On my first day as a freshman I was greeted at the door by my old nemesis who had been promoted to principle at the high school. I about shit myself. Within the first week I was dragged into the office at least three times over shit I had nothing to do with. She actually did this to several kids. One day at lunch she was walking through the cafeteria and a fight broke out. She immediately jumped in between the two kids who were fighting. The one kid who seemed to make it his job to get in fights took a step back, realized this bitch was in the way, and just socked her right in the face. She went limp, hit the floor, and the fight continued. I never saw her, or the kid who punched her again.

I was told she was allowed to retire early with full benefits and a really nice pension. I'm sure the kid was expelled. I don't think he was arrested. It was the early/mid 90s and times were quite different.
Click to expand...
Imagine the look on that poor kids face. He’s getting his ass kicked, and just when he thinks he’s about to be saved, this nigga punches out the principal and proceeds to continue kicking his shit in.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Heavy Duty Boots, Broseph and UnsufficentBoobage
hambeerlyingnreed said:
@berserkerarmor

What's the story behind the cavewoman getting the LGBT club shut down? It sounds interesting!
Click to expand...
god my brother and i's personal lolcow? shes a hoot. i will give a run down on the cavewoman.
1) she is like 6'1 and fat and has an ungodly face.
2) she's in the pit in marching band (aka auxiliary percussion) and tried to run the section despite not being section leader and a lot of people hate her for it.
3) her mom died about 3 years ago right? you know thats sad an all but she brings it up as an excuse for EVERYTHING. legit EVERYTHING. recently she told a teacher that she couldnt do the test because she was sad about her mom. she uses her moms (horrible actually) death as an excuse for everything and its just sad and annoying.
4) tried to get a teacher in trouble for "bringing up religion" during a class discussion about a book they were reading that covers some religious things that was just mentioned by the teacher and not even talked about. (my brother told me this one he was livid)
5) acts like the art room is hers and will legit take your supplies from you and sits at the teachers desk when she has been told not to many times by the art teacher (who doesnt like her either).
6) is the perfect example of a fake lesbian whos SJWy and attention seeking. ex: legit saying she was gonna self harm one day for no reason out of nowhere during art class and we all just looked at her cuz we knew it was bs.
7) legit had a thing on a backpack of hers that was not clear (when its supposed to be) "dont search, just lesbian"
8 ) tries to teach the english class that she tried to get the teacher in trouble in so badly that the teacher legit has told her to be quiet and let her teach (which she cant really go to the school about it she was disrupting)
9) this is a personal experience but: tried to make me her new best friend when she found out i was transgender f2m. i legit was only nice to her because she wouldn't leave me alone. me and my other friend who's f2m avoid her like the plague due to it. we think she would try to get into our pants if she wanted to.
10) tried to tell my brother he was racist for making a beaner joke about himself even though we are latino????

so a friend of mine who is gay wanted to make a LGBT club. there's a lot of us actually despite the southernness of our area and he thought it would be a nice idea so we had a space to talk about things safely. no one is really the extreme SJW types (even the one stray NB person is chill) and we all know each other and we are all friends pretty much. expect. her. HER. the outcasted one for a reason. well, it got approved by the school whatever. yet, the cavewoman wanted to be vice president and since my friend was by default the president he was the president. he did not choose or say she could be it. she went behind his back and begging (manipulated prob) the teacher to let her be it without my friends consent or knowledge. my friends WAS LIVID. period. the club was never fully established because the cave woman legit told MY FRIEND HE WAS NOT REALLY GAY. okay now listen? my friend? he's the gayest man i know. hes a fucking TWINK. yeah when we were kids he dated some girls. me and him came out around the same time. i legit support this kid from hell and back. also he has a fucking boyfriend. this cavewoman who has never been with a woman at all, told HIM he was not gay and also trying to take his job. my friend said "fuck it you have it" and quit. it fell apart because that bitch never did anything with it after that. by then most of the lgbt people in my school knew this had happened and were not gonna join if she was president or even vice. we all knew she was not gay (the whole school knew it which is why my brother dislikes her also) and she had the audacity to call a gay man not gay. so yeah. there's that.
 
  • Like
  • Feels
  • Informative
Reactions: seri0us, The Littlest Shitlord, Pee Cola and 9 others
I remember this one underclassmen named Mateo, he was a skinny greasy haired weeb that was obsessed with Bruce Lee so much so that he got a bowl hair cut and had a nasty deep voice that just did not fit him.
He was really creepy with one of his peers/ kinda friend who liked me. He would grope her and latch on like a parasite at school.
For awhile I was talking to her because 7.9/10 and got some succ n fucc from her and a bunch of nudes and when this dude found out he went fucking ballistic. He blew up my fb messenger on how I ruined his chance and stole her from him and I just sent "lol" each time and it stopped for awhile.
Later she told me she was bored one weekend and invited him over just to kill time and this dude basically tried molesting her and she pushes him away (beta af so she didn't feel threatened and he was to pussy to continue) it caused him to sperg out "WHY CAN'T I HAVE YOU, WHY DOES OP GET YOU. WHAT DOES HE HAVE THAT I DONT" and replies with "well he's got a nice dick, doesn't smell and he's genuinely nice to be around. You're fucking weird Mateo and you're just so desperate it's disgusting"
After he just gave me stink eye for the rest of the year.
Last day of senior year, we had some freshman in our Comp class (we just played vidya and TCG most of the year since teacher didn't care) one was a furry/brony who drew mlp porn and was just a overall moron.
The morning before that class I just bought a MTG lot from a friend for $5 because why not, and this kid wanted to get into it so I told him "we'll you're in luck my guy, I so happen to have a dark element lot I'm selling that's worth $150 but I'm willing to sell it to you for $50 since its last day of school. This fucking guy takes all the cash he made from commission and hands me it so happily and keeps thanking me. And I just say "no thank you" when I'm leaving I overheard one his friends tell the guy the entire lot is worthless unless they're for upgrading your own deck. and his face just said "dead inside"
 
  • Like
  • Dumb
Reactions: seri0us, Count groudon, soryu and 3 others
In either kindergarten or first grade (think it was kindergarten), I accidentally went into the boys' bathroom because some of us were playing with the classroom kickball during recess when we weren't supposed to ('cause privileges or some shit), and it got kicked into a ditch in the schoolyard. One of the boys had to climb in and get it out before the aide could catch us, and to hide our "crime" of playing kickball, we had to wash the dirt off. But I was following the boy to help and he didn't realize it until we were at the sinks, and he hollered at me to get out while some kid at the urinals did a double-take.
 
  • Like
Reactions: The Littlest Shitlord, Count groudon, UnsufficentBoobage and 2 others
In middle school we were allowed to watch a movie about Christopher Columbus that involved native woman who were topless. It wasn't sexualized at all and we didn't have to ask our parents to sign waivers so it really surprised all of the students when there were suddenly breasts on the screen. Despite there being a lot of pervy guys in my class, no one said anything. I thought it was sort of cool that everyone was acting "grown up" about seeing nudity.

We watched the movie in pieces over a few days and when it was over we had a class discussion about it. The teacher (an old woman who was semi-retired) asked the class what they thought of the movie and one of the black kids went, "There were some titties!" and everyone burst out laughing, including the teacher. It was great.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Robert Sanvagene, eple, BR55 and 9 others
In what I believe was 7th grade, we had a new student I'll call Laura. I don't know remember very much about her because she didn't last one whole semester; she barely stayed at the school long enough to make the class photo.

From what I recall, Laura borrowed something from my then-best friend and refused to give it back. Eventually, our principal got involved in the dispute, and she gave Laura an ultimatum: return the item in question within a certain number of days, or pay a $2 replacement fine that increased by 5 cents each subsequent day it went unpaid.

Laura instead left the school, neither returning the item nor paying fine.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Broseph, Count groudon and UnsufficentBoobage
Wasn't there for this, but I heard about it through one of my friends.

A student walked in on some band kids fucking in one of the bathrooms. Hilarity ensued as band teacher proceeded to awkwardly lose his shit in class when he found out.
 
  • Winner
Reactions: Count groudon and UnsufficentBoobage
Some guy in highschool came to school dressed up as a grandma and exposed his underwear all throughout the school.
No one stopped him or even attempted to try due to his underwear was already falling off and we just assumed he had a mental breakdown and didn't want him shooting up the school.

Next day came in and acted as if nothing had happened
 
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: UnsufficentBoobage
One time in 8th grade I was stuck at school an unusually long time sk I started jerking it in a bathroom stall. Then, some tard kid walked in and yelled "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE!?". After that incident I developed a phobia of masturbating in a public toilet until I got a temp job in a warehouse at age 19.
 
  • Islamic Content
  • TMI
Reactions: Hamstirer, Isaac Clarke, Pee Cola and 6 others
Kiwi Lime Pie said:
In what I believe was 7th grade, we had a new student I'll call Laura. I don't know remember very much about her because she didn't last one whole semester; she barely stayed at the school long enough to make the class photo.

From what I recall, Laura borrowed something from my then-best friend and refused to give it back. Eventually, our principal got involved in the dispute, and she gave Laura an ultimatum: return the item in question within a certain number of days, or pay a $2 replacement fine that increased by 5 cents each subsequent day it went unpaid.

Laura instead left the school, neither returning the item nor paying fine.
Click to expand...

She was a criminal, probably owed tiny debts all over town
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back