💼 Careercow SHiFT / @shiftposting - Angriest speedrunner on earth. 20,000 hours spent playing one SpongeBob game. Frequently rages until his voice gets blown out.

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Having a self-injuring meltdown over not being able to do something you weren't meant to do in a kids' game is something only true autism could bring to the table, big kudos to this man.
 
Wonder whats worse, hearing SpongeBob music on loop or bing bing wahoos non-stop. Being forced to sit in the corner of a speed runners room should be added to CIA list of advanced interrogation techniques
 
Alright I think you guys are just making lolcows up now. Every few weeks the kiwifarms introduces me to a new feverdream of a personality that only the depths of the Internet can conjure up.

This guy has spent the last 6.....7? Years and 20,000 hours in a fucking spongebob game? For WHAT?!
 
Niggergante said:
Honestly I feel like shift is a tragic case. I remember watching him during 2020 and now he's still on the same game trying to squeeze water from a rock of an optimized route. Very sad.
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You know if someone's spending their time speedrunning a game I don't think they're typically the kind of person to break free from poor life decisions.
 
I don't know who this guy is, but I want to pop him right in the nose. Like right when he's throwing a tantrum over Spongebob not doing whatever the hell he should do I'd like to nail him. Not even all that hard. Just, 'pop'.
 
How does raging because SpongeBob isn't jumping around his house the right way going to elevate alternate sexual archetypes in the marketplace?
 
The idea of being forced to speedrun a kid's game sounds like a great form of borderline unethical punishment. I don't even want to imagine what kind of nightmares he gets from this game.
 
mentally retarded user said:
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SHiFT stubs his toe, from this stream.
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Fucking gold.

Cancer Man Metokur said:
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He spergsout after reseting that run.
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Why even have the microphone if you're going to mute yourself 90% of the time anyway? His throat must be sore from all that screaming, at least he's predominantly underwater so that isn't an issue.

Also, hello to all the newcomers in the thread, turn your volume down as a precaution.
 
Is there a good clip channel for this guy? A channel that presents the clip as is, no faggy commentary over it, and no bleeps or mutes of cuss-words? I haven't been able to find a good one.

I saw this guy in a documentary months ago, and I was laughing my ass off at him crying as Spongebob does gay little twirls in the air.
 
Cancer Man Metokur said:
He probably does it to not give trolls content, or something, but it doesn't work. He's like LTG, mutes to not give content, but that itself just becomes content.
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I meant it in a more rhetorical way, but still. I think he just forgets that he has a camera pointed at him continually, if he's going to mute himself to go against le trolls, then it seems idiotic to not also turn off the camera. Maybe he's just an idiot, I don't know.

DrunkenLemon said:
Is there a good clip channel for this guy? A channel that presents the clip as is, no faggy commentary over it, and no bleeps or mutes of cuss-words? I haven't been able to find a good one.

I saw this guy in a documentary months ago, and I was laughing my ass off at him crying as Spongebob does gay little twirls in the air.
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I'd say this thread is probably the best you'll get in terms of clips.
 
I do always enjoy his post-rage face after he melts down and starts huffing and puffing it's like a 5 year old after having a tantrum being told he has to share his toys with kids at the sandbox
 
The rage that Spongebob can bring out of people continues to fascinate and amuse me
 
Man is this what Christorians felt when the idea guys saga started? Where "the good old days" were over longer than they lasted and everything after is nothing but downhill?
I used to follow the guy from 2017 back when the first sub hour was a huge deal and most runs came down to "fast nut" until about 2019. I even went so far as to set up an autohotkey script that ran while I slept to steal bits from the "watch interactive ads for bits" scheme that Twitch used to have. Just to donate the $50 some odd bucks worth of bits it got me because I genuinely liked the streams and community around the game.
Alas over time interest fades, the community becomes more pozzed and you just gotta move on. Checking back from time to time just made things sadder watching things get less fun and the chat/community becoming weirder and more taaahxic.
Small thread tax of a few things I still have on hand since I do miss those good old days. Probably have more and chat clips in old backups. Little reminders of when things were much more fun.
balding SHiFT.webpSHiFT hey beter.webpshift casting couch.webp

And something more thread appropriate, I'll take my 🧩 now.
shift.webp
 
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