Shitty Alternate History Thread - If only the Romans had AK-47's they would've survived...

[General Emílio Médici]

Well, for as retarded an idea as it is, alternatehistory.forum is now online thanks to an autistic friend of mine. God Help Us All.

My general idea, at least as it is going forward, is to try and wrangle some banned AH.com users together and to encourage a bit more of an open community. No instant perm bans, try and not suppress the forum as much as Ian did. Is it a pointless plan? Probably, but if Ian ever shits the bed totally, it might not be a bad idea having this in the background. It's shockingly cheap to keep a small forum up, so this will be going on for a while.

EDIT: I forgot to mention, any ideas/recommendations?

EDIT 2: Also, important note. The Email server is shit apparently, the email takes a few minute to arrive.

Gonna make a account, just to be sure. Might post some shit and shill the site around.

View attachment 5522574
Im exaggerated the Hyperborea part but the rest is more or less true.

I must now read this. It really is a shame TDS hit the man so hard, he used to be pretty even handed in dealing with the monstrous and off tone points of history and understanding that things have changed.

In a weird way, that's my problem with it.
The Race invaded Earth expecting to encounter knights on horseback, so their weapons would be designed to kill knights on horseback. If we were invading a country from the Middle Ages, we'd send Strykers or MRAPs armed with low-caliber Gatling guns, and light mortars, not M1s with APFSDS rounds. Skywardens and not A-10s. That heavy stuff would be more trouble than it's worth.

I understand why you would have a problem with it, but that is kind of the point. In a way Turtledove actually tried to make them alien by creating a race with a deeply different outlook and philosophy on life, who take the maxims of "better safe than sorry, slow and steady win the race" to the absolute illogical endpoint.

 

[BScCollateral]

I understand why you would have a problem with it, but that is kind of the point. In a way Turtledove actually tried to make them alien by creating a race with a deeply different outlook and philosophy on life, who take the maxims of "better safe than sorry, slow and steady win the race" to the absolute illogical endpoint.

I don't think it ruins the story or anything, but it sort of draws attention to "The Race arrives with exactly the equipment that makes for an interesting story."
Perhaps a little bit more than that, it feels like "Alien armies evolve to match modern Human armies" rather than "Armies evolve to engage their opposing armies." The first tanks were more like modern IFVs, and tanks only developed to counter enemy armor; so in my opinion we are not seeing a truly alien military which was developed to face alien threats; we're seeing an analog to modern armies.
This isn't really a bad thing, because the battle scenes are credible and well-handled.

 

[BirdUp]

what if al-qaeda were breeding dinosaurs in afghanistan

 

[DJ Grelle]

I'm sure alternatehistory.forum will, like most similar alternative forums, collapse in a pile of recriminations and low user counts within 6 months to a year, but I made an account anyway.

This is kind of defeatist ngl.
Just come online every other day and write a post.
If everyone does that for a month and people start passing the URL around to others who might be interested then you're halfway there.

 

[Raoul_Duke]

Made an account, just to support a good alternative to AH.com.

 

[Ishtar]

I'm sure alternatehistory.forum will, like most similar alternative forums, collapse in a pile of recriminations and low user counts within 6 months to a year, but I made an account anyway.

Eh...still why not create an account?

Thread Tax:

Wut if There was a war between American states in the 1780s-Pennsylvania and Maryland fighting each other as New York and Rhode Island raised militia against Virginia.

 

[Mayor Cody Travers]

Eh...still why not create an account?

Thread Tax:

Wut if There was a war between American states in the 1780s-Pennsylvania and Maryland fighting each other as New York and Rhode Island raised militia against Virginia.

A breakup of the nascent USA in my opinion would be the classic north and south divide, but eighty years early - in 1786, when the 1780s version of the New England Essex Junto manages to get the northern states (including MD) to secede over river/water travel rights in Mississippi (the northern states needed it, the southern states dithered).

The Junto was obviously first and foremost focused on New England, but would happily rope in as much of the north as possible, with the Potomac as their maximum preference. That'd leave Virginia - already squabbling with Maryland over Potomac rights that year, and setting up the conferences that would eventually lead to the Constitutional Convention - southward as the remainder of the USA. We can call the seceding north the Federated States, Fredonia (the name came in 1803, but hey), etc. We can pretty conveniently give the FSA the Northwest Territory too, since the Ohio is as good a border as any and the Northwest Ordinance still comes into play for anti-slavery purposes.

If they went to war, it's likely over western land and water travel rights. The north was Anglophilic still and the south was where a lot of French love of the early republic came into play, especially the powerhouse that is Virginia (Louisville is so named for a reason). So Britain would of course back up the FSA as the USA tilts to France. I can see Napoleon in time selling Louisiana to the USA for easy cash, but I can also see an Anglo-FSA alliance in the Napoleonic age at least capture the northern chunk of it from the USA that real-life Mid-Atlantic and Yankee settlers pushed westward into anyways, since they're the same latitudes to travel west to and not good cash crop land the southern states would like. The FSA may well purchase the future Utah Territory and California north of the 37th parallel as the real-world America almost did in 1835 till British creditors in Mexico shot it down, a friendly FSA won't have that issue. The USA will move west from its remaining part of Louisiana into Texas and war for it in some form, but I doubt they'll get to push west to the Pacific unless Mexico's as bungled as reality and they successfully conduct a quick war like the real-world Mexican War was.

Economically the FSA will industrialize and liberalize, the USA/alt-CSA won't really be a giant Brazil or banana republic as many would claim but it'll still be the most agricultural and behind of the Anglophone nations by a longshot.

 

[Ishtar]

If the USA breaks up, the entire idea of big republics as viable replacements for monarchical rule looks much weaker. The effect this has on other Atlantic revolutions is negative.

I see the British trying to get back in. Likely with some sort of aim to regain control diplomatically-perhaps via trade and protection agreements.

Settlers from these different confederations are likely going to fight in the Ohio River valley-with a lot of conflict over access to rivers.

The Spanish do everything they can to strengthen their hold on Florida while also supporting the 1780s CSA(that is Virginia through Georgia). France is too bankrupt to do much other than see its efforts gone to even more waste.

An early break up of the American confederation has far wider effects I think then you're allowing-there is a much stronger possibility of settler republics emerging that are not part of one of the two confederations. As well as stronger European influence. Still population growth being what it is, will drive the Natives further and further west. Though a disunited America will be much easier for the Indians to play off and perhaps hold out against longer.

I honestly don't see either polity "making it" to the Mississippi. No federal government to impose its writ on settlers/squatters. That may form their own governments. Spain, the Natives and British also playing against each other.

Its basically a fractured North America-with European intrigues, weak confederations on the Atlantic coast(assuming even those last), Native confederations(perhaps Tecumseh?), Spain in the South.

The French revolution and Napoleon put a wrench in the latter. So I'd see the region of Florida and the Louisiana territory ending up in "American" hands. Simply too vast and no other power can manage. But it will be much slower-with official expeditions, settler groups going off on their own, and much fiercer struggles over arable land between White populations that will already have a generation's potential difference between them.

 

[General Emílio Médici]

Well, for as retarded an idea as it is, alternatehistory.forum is now online thanks to an autistic friend of mine. God Help Us All.

My general idea, at least as it is going forward, is to try and wrangle some banned AH.com users together and to encourage a bit more of an open community. No instant perm bans, try and not suppress the forum as much as Ian did. Is it a pointless plan? Probably, but if Ian ever shits the bed totally, it might not be a bad idea having this in the background. It's shockingly cheap to keep a small forum up, so this will be going on for a while.

EDIT: I forgot to mention, any ideas/recommendations?

EDIT 2: Also, important note. The Email server is shit apparently, the email takes a few minute to arrive.

Please fix the HTTP / HTTPS thing, the confirmation email sends out a HTTP link which does not allow for people using the HTTPS version of the site to actually confirm their shit and most new browsers automatically swap to HTTPS which also breaks it.

 

[Skeletonized Cow]

Please fix the HTTP / HTTPS thing, the confirmation email sends out a HTTP link which does not allow for people using the HTTPS version of the site to actually confirm their shit and most new browsers automatically swap to HTTPS which also breaks it.

Just got the message, it should be fixed now.

 

[Big Fat Frog]

I always thought that WWI and II being fought with energy weapons was a pretty nifty idea.

Also I had this idea that the Ottoman Empire conquered most of Europe and discovered America and colonized it, but the entire Americas wanted to be on it’s own and declared independence in the early 50s and began a severe cultural shift where they abandoned Islam and became an atheistic state. Then in the mid 50s the atheist Arab Americas repurposed crashed alien technology and with increasing tensions from the USSR they declared war and won Alaska, but further tensions later on causes another war in which the entire USSR was folded into the atheist Arab Americas and as a result Turkey was re-invaded and also became a part of this unholy matrimony. Then this new Frankencountry that spoke Arabic with no religion built an O’Niell cylinder in space using reverse-engineered alien technology that was capable of FTL travel as a mobile colony ship that established remote research stations on exoplanets and act as the Milky Way’s scientists studying the laws of the universe from safe distances and preserving the natural order of things. Then God, angry at the inability of the Christian faith to spread along with humanity playing God, erases all signs of humanity from the cosmos, rendering Earth back to pre-historic state. I came to the conclusion at the end that this was absolutely fucking autistic AND retarded.

 

[JJLiautaud]

I always thought that WWI and II being fought with energy weapons was a pretty nifty idea.

Also I had this idea that the Ottoman Empire conquered most of Europe and discovered America and colonized it, but the entire Americas wanted to be on it’s own and declared independence in the early 50s and began a severe cultural shift where they abandoned Islam and became an atheistic state. Then in the mid 50s the atheist Arab Americas repurposed crashed alien technology and with increasing tensions from the USSR they declared war and won Alaska, but further tensions later on causes another war in which the entire USSR was folded into the atheist Arab Americas and as a result Turkey was re-invaded and also became a part of this unholy matrimony. Then this new Frankencountry that spoke Arabic with no religion built an O’Niell cylinder in space using reverse-engineered alien technology that was capable of FTL travel as a mobile colony ship that established remote research stations on exoplanets and act as the Milky Way’s scientists studying the laws of the universe from safe distances and preserving the natural order of things. Then God, angry at the inability of the Christian faith to spread along with humanity playing God, erases all signs of humanity from the cosmos, rendering Earth back to pre-historic state. I came to the conclusion at the end that this was absolutely fucking autistic AND retarded.

Sounds really based and likely to get you banned so its really good.

 

[General Emílio Médici]

I accidentally got political on one of my sock accounts due to the insane reply of some dude on a AHC question (How to have "the center" hold SCOTUS was the question, the solution this dude had? Have only Democrat presidents choose the SCOTUS nominees from 1976 to 2015 guys, including Garland in) so I decided to just make the ban worth it and went to the political chat. Two threads caught my eye immediately: one asking why Biden is polling so badly and one talking about the "rise in the far right".

I think the second one is what got me banned. I told them they were being stupid and people don't want immigrants overflowing Europe. All the standard NPC talking points were thrown my way but one final reply I was unable to reply to was the best. Some actual retard said "there is no mass migration to the USA" It's amazing.

I also just realized this as I was looking over it, but why does AH.com look so shit? I mean look at it. It's literally the default xenforo skin. Look at it:



This is THE website for alternate history discussion in english. Probably the biggest one of it's genre in any language worldwide. And it look like it just was booted up for the first time. There is absolutely 0 style or attempt at making it look good. Actually it isn't even the default XenForo, it's a old default no longer in use. If you look at the website the dude ITT thread made it is using a newer default skin that looks better. Look at it and compare the two:



You have a better looking, smoother interface. The rounded corners and softer colors. The avatars! Why does AH.com hide people's avatars anyway? There has been 0 attempt to even try and make AH.com look like it is the big and important niche forum it is, at a glance it looks indistinguisheable from something someone made in a afternoon following a youtube tutorial on how to setup a basic forum with XenForo. Why the fuck does the website some dude made on a whim here look better than Ian's precious little club which has been gatekeeping alternate history fiction enthusiasts for over a decade now?

 

[Skeletonized Cow]

one talking about the "rise in the far right".

I saw that thread thanks to my snooping in the kicks and bans thread. Lol. Lmao even, the coping in that thread was funny.

You have a better looking, smoother interface. The rounded corners and softer colors. The avatars! Why does AH.com hide people's avatars anyway? There has been 0 attempt to even try and make AH.com look like it is the big and important niche forum it is, at a glance it looks indistinguisheable from something someone made in a afternoon following a youtube tutorial on how to setup a basic forum with XenForo. Why the fuck does the website some dude made on a whim here look better than Ian's precious little club which has been gatekeeping alternate history fiction enthusiasts for over a decade now?

What's weirder about it is that this is the default XenForo 2.0 style. AH.com uses XenForo 2.0, so it was a conscious choice to keep the old XenForo style. But what's somewhat weird about it is that AH.com has certain elements that are in the newer style (the new posts, post thread buttons) and even has the "Share this page" section but without any of the sharing options visible.

As for the avatars? Well, it's because AH.com is a serious place for serious discussions. Avatars might turn the forum into a "kiddie board." At least, so said Ian a long time back. He does have a point with the long signatures though, I'll have to have Thuck try and change that.




As for ah.forum's future style, I want to add one but they cost money if you don't make them yourself. And I trust Thuck to set the forum up, but not enough to play around on that front too heavily. Since I'm still trying to maintain a decent budget, I'll buy a few but only after I purchase the license to remove the XenForo branding. Any recommendations? I'll keep the default XenForo as an option, but I was thinking a default in a red styling might be decent. I want ah.forum to be visually distinct from ah.com, Sea Lion Press, etc.

 

[Curzon Dax-sama]

Gentlemen, I know why I never post in Chat. Troons and commies are not worth my time.

 

[General Emílio Médici]

I was pretty sure my account was forfeit anyway. I will make a new sock later it isn't exactly a big deal.

 

[Curzon Dax-sama]

Well, I have my account for nearly 15 years now, I don't want to loose it against retards that lack reading comprehension.

 

[BirdUp]

what if nuclear bombs were dropped on north korea after the 1969 EC-121 shootdown incident

 

[DJ Grelle]

@Skeletonized Cow
I'd suggest parchment Brown and red leather or smth like that. Nostalgic vibes to the total war center forums.

 

[draggs]

In a weird way, that's my problem with it.
The Race invaded Earth expecting to encounter knights on horseback, so their weapons would be designed to kill knights on horseback. If we were invading a country from the Middle Ages, we'd send Strykers or MRAPs armed with low-caliber Gatling guns, and light mortars, not M1s with APFSDS rounds. Skywardens and not A-10s. That heavy stuff would be more trouble than it's worth.

Turtledove does try to explain this when Sam Yeager is talking with the Lizard POWs. He asks them why did you bring all this shit if you expected to find knights in shining armor? They look at him like he's retarded then explain he should already know why, it's just the Race's extreme better safe than sorry superprepared mindset. The head lizard Atvar also reflects how he's happy that the budget cutters back Home who did want to skimp on the conquest fleet lost the debate. The other two conquest fleets took a way overkill amount of soldiers and stuff compared to the resistance they thought they'd face and the Race doesn't like things that are different. It's a good example of the Race's "don't ever stray from convention" not always fucking it over. Of course the real reason is to make the action of the story more exciting, but he does at least try to give in-world explanations for the literary contrivances