Single-Mother Hate thread

[Among Us Gaming]

the perspective of incels doesn't matter

Is there any perspective that is criticial of single mothers themselves that matters?
Would you accept any real criticism of them, or is it all just the moids fault?

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

Is there any perspective that is criticial of single mothers themselves that matters?
Would you accept any real criticism of them, or is it all just the moids fault?

If you read through the thread, I've posed this question multiple times. Only one person even discussed the possibility of an alternative solution and I'm being generous. So no, it's all lock-step "You will think what we want you to or we will call you an incel" bullshit. It's been 10 pages of nothing but "MOIDS BAD FOR WRONG THINK". Might as well just Spergatory the damn thread.

 

[Among Us Gaming]

If you read through the thread, I've posed this question multiple times. Only one person even discussed the possibility of an alternative solution and I'm being generous. So no, it's all lock-step "You will think what we want you to or we will call you an incel" bullshit. It's been 10 pages of nothing but "MOIDS BAD FOR WRONG THINK". Might as well just Spergatory the damn thread.

My reply there wasn't intended as a rhetorical question or "gotcha" though. Like, I genuinely wanted a response to the question, as I'd also like to try and understand the other side of this conversation more and see if they're really interested in fixing the issue we see before us, or only interested in making sure their tribe comes out on top instead.
Both the incel types and the feminist types engage in that kind of tribalism, and while I get that, it is at best unproductive, and at worst severly corrosive.

 

[Overwritten Tapes]

If you like cats and hate single mothers.... every female cat that has kittens is one.

 

[Dawdler]

Cats don't get child support

 

[Clobber3]

women cant inseminate themselves

 

[biglurker]

I only met one single mother (widow) who was a good person, and this thread is an example of why that is the case.
Everything a single mother does is excused, since people are not adapted to the modern circumstances of single mothers. They are very rarely widows and people who had their partners run off on them.
The modern single mother often is a woman with self-destructive levels of poor decision making. Almost all I have met are single by choice, refusing to even marry the fathers that go above and beyond to take responsibility for the child. Instead they go on sleeping around, having even more children, and getting involved with increasingly shitter people (PoC, child abusers (wish I was joking), etc). They never learn because either family and the government steps in to insulate them from any major consequences and criticism. Both still operate under the assumptions of the pre-sexual revolution world and miss placed chivalry. Again, look at this thread where the biggest faggots on the forum would rather cry incel and make up harrowing stories that rarely if ever happen to justify their existence. Laws alone are not going to fix this. You can heavily penalize deadbeat men and that alone would not fix it. You can fix divorce laws to protect men and women from predatory family courts and the issue would still be there. You can end gibs for single mothers short of widows and it won't solve it.
There needs to be a societal change that encourages people shame single motherhood and refuse support for the now common worse cases of it. This would need to happen in tandem with new laws, and also societal change against sex positive culture the brought us here in the first place.

TL;DR Its fucked and we are dealing with them for decades to come.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

Yes. I meant EVERYTHING you just laid out. Financially rape the dad if he tries to play Deadbeat Dad. Make maximum penalties from the Dad specifically. No more money from the taxpayers. If that means Chad has to drop out of school, get a 9-5 that ruins his life, so be it. I'm perfectly fine with financially raping and ruining deadbeat dads.

Awesome. You should start a private extrajudicial enforcement business. I'll have my gal set up a call.

If you read through the thread, I've posed this question multiple times. Only one person even discussed the possibility of an alternative solution and I'm being generous. So no, it's all lock-step "You will think what we want you to or we will call you an incel" bullshit. It's been 10 pages of nothing but "MOIDS BAD FOR WRONG THINK". Might as well just Spergatory the damn thread.

But your "make men pay" thing isn't an alternative to where to place criticism (which seemed to be the prior person's comment); it's more placing accountability where it belongs - on both parents. Of course public assistance would dwindle to very little if non-caretaking parents fully and adequately supported their children to the extent I said.

But to the other comment's observation, the reason women bring up criticism of the men is - well, look at the theme of the thread, and go back and read the things said specifically about mothers who are not married (this thread has surprisingly had a few more evenhanded comments, though most make very sure to reiterate what lazy gold-digging sluts single mothers are). The general thrust of comments, here and all across the site whenever it gets randomly injected into some thread with nothing to do with the topic brought up, with the exception of about a single thread/ maybe a couple others, is almost universally directed at mothers. So noting that men play a role, when that is often ignored (and paired with energy that truly and honestly needs a better outlet), is reasonable.

But even beyond that, it's worth acknowledging that absent/inadequately supportive and engaged parents (let's say men here bc that's the overwhelming percentage, typical, and my finger is tired of tapping long, inclusive phrasing) not only made the same error in creating an unwanted child as the mother, but also then chose to make other and ongoing ones that will critically impact and may well ruin the life of a child - their child - and deliberately put the parent raising the child in a very, very difficult position, the consequences of which can mushroom for the family and for society.

Parents have a series of choices to make, and after they both made a dumb one together, the dreaded single mother on gibs made the accountable one to raise the child she helped create; the baby daddy not present and not paying made the choice to eschew responsibility and bounce - and makes that choice again every single day. That is a separate fail from the first one, and a very reasonable criticism. And it's one that is far less often as vicious and in the forefront as the single mother criticisms*.

* including and notably here, where it gets thrown into the mix with a lot of other issues and perceptions about society, women, etc.

So why wouldn't it be reasonable to keep banging the drum about men? Or raising the point that the two people involved are not saddled with the same responsibilities, so when you do your 5 Whys exercise and get to the real root cause of why x dollars are needed to support single mothers and kids, parents who bounce are probably at your 3rd or 4th why (i.e., closer to an actual root cause) rather than the easy first answer of "single mothers are lazy" or the self-soothing red herrings about (uniquely, supposedly) women's constitutions/ characters overall.

...

For anyone thinking single mothers don't get enough public criticism and are just carried and coddled and encouraged by positive PR and buckets of gold from the government, just lazy and congenital grifters and beggars, just irresponsible fatasses goldbricking their way through life pretending they have it so hard: if it makes you feel better, it is a very hard, very draining, very upsetting, very worrisome, and very exhausting thing to do. So perhaps you will enjoy the fact that they are getting at least a fraction of the misery and fear you believe they deserve.

Spoiler: Get real

It's hard to work to provide the material things and healthy things for children, and it's hard to be the primary and the backup 24/ 7/ 365 for all the time children need and deserve - yeah, school and homework at night, but also all the social things (whether formal activities, or showing up to the class party, or letting the kid join brownies or cub scouts (which are at an age that parents are basically always there), or getting the kid from after-school care to their best friend's birthday party that was scheduled for 3:30 in the afternoon on a weekday), and also time to shop for food or clothes or Christmas, time to stay up all night creating a last-minute costume for Halloween, time to plan and make holidays special and nice for kids, and time to do dinner and baths and bedtime stories and lullabies.

And the critical one-on-one non-scheduled time that is where so much truly meaningful connection and teaching and enjoyment come in between parent and child. That's where you learn - before it turns into your kid acting out in school - that your kid feels sad or scared or has a crush on a friend or got snubbed or can't see the whiteboard too clearly and gets headaches everyday. Or that they secretly want to try out for a part in the school play but haven't asked because they are afraid you don't have the money to pay for the costume and that you couldn't get them to rehearsals. Or just how they like to be and who they are as people - and vice-versa.

So yes, accomplishing all of those things, along with working even just 40 hours/ week, add another 2 hours/ day for commutes and kid pick-up/drop-off, cleaning house and tending to home in general, preparing 3 meals/ day, laundry, errands (many last-minute for kids; it's inevitable), activities & the whole bedtime routine mentioned above is HARD, even just from a physical standpoint.

And that's assuming you have a job that doesn't demand your time, work, or worry outside of formal office hours or on weekends. Plus the constant fears about money, and constantly sweating and praying to keep the job - bc there is no backup, for time or money.

...So many single people here gripe about what a grind work is, how they have absolutely no time outside of work, wage cage, it's inhumane, we need a revolution. OK: multiply your hours times 2, keep your pay the same, and split it with 1 or more other people. No more funko-pop collections or badass survival gear; no more weekends lost in a haze of high scores and Discord, or day hikes, or golf games, or spending Sunday evenings prepping for your big meeting Monday morning that could mean a stepping-stone promotion.

So rest assured single parenting can put that person in a perpetual state of heightened cortisol and an amygdala that never stops signaling. Hopefully that's enough punishment for some folks to feel a little better.

"It's what they signed up for/ consequences of their actions and of choosing poorly due to poor character and decision making" - sure, but only one of the parents lives those consequences in this situation.

But the most important people in the scenario are, of course, the children. (And to those who just say fuck dem kids, whatever. You're either an asshole or just an unserious person. Or exceptionally stupid. Dk, Dc.)

Kids are of course put in a somewhat vulnerable situation by the choices of the parents to create and have a baby. Could turn out fine, but it's a potential vulnerability right out of the gate.

But then they have a parent who fucks off. Not only is it the physical and financial absence, and the loss of a parent to guide them; there's also of course the division of labor of caring for a child [IF they both contribute, which is another topic], coverage for each other/ the kid, allowing each parent the time and ability and attention to handle the rest of life as well. No relationship with that parent - which kids absolutely crave, from just being around to all the structured things I already gave examples of.

You also have a child seeing the parent raising them struggle and worry everyday - which imo is tragic, it truly is, and I'm sorry for any kid who ever has to worry about their parent or see their parent fail.

And then you also have the child growing up KNOWING that one of their parents - the tightest bond, generally - DNGAF to know them, does not love them, and literally does not care what happens to them; no investment making the baby, and not even becoming a full, living creature, not even being literally helpless, mattered enough; the child knows he doesn't matter and doesn't count. A parent who won't lift a finger or spend a dime except under penalty (and often not even then, if they can get that one-way ticket to Merida). Yes, that fucks up a child's mind and its development. And it often plays out through their whole life. One of the two most important people in a child's world said, "I don't care if I ruin you, and your mother, too. You're nothing."

They also learn (eventually, hopefully - though it's a sad thing to hope for) that that absent parent is a piece of shit, a coward, AND a fool: made not just an initial colossal error, right along with the mom, but then continued on every single day of the kid's life. Never once thought to give anything but what they originally donated. No feeling, not even general humanity. No sense of personal responsibility, not even minimal. No sense of value or obligation. Imagine the psychic impact of knowing that that's in your genes.

Two people created difficult situation and a vulnerability for a kid, but if one of them is there and one isn't, the one that's not reenacts and increases the harm to that child every single day. That is not only fair to point out, but critical.

 

[Wood]

The modern single mother often is a woman with self-destructive levels of poor decision making

Nigger, that is like every woman ever.

 

[NoBueno]

I don't particular have anything against single mothers. But I have heard the odd horror story of the guy going on a date with a single mother and her implying the daughter is up for a two for one deal if he's interested. I suppose to make it more enticing than just a single unattached woman, which is what she is competing with. I didn't take much notice at first until I found out in the upper class the two for one yachting deals with the mother and daughter models. Just a more extravagant version of what happens in the lower classes I suppose.

 

[Toothp!ck]

You should start a private extrajudicial enforcement business. I'll have my gal set up a call.

The government already does that. Deadbeat dads are jailed and can have their wages garnished. Off course the last one is assuming the woman picked a man who has wages to garnish

But your "make men pay" thing isn't an alternative to where to place criticism

Only make the men that created the child pay. And if that man is a deadbeat then the woman can pay herself.

the reason women bring up criticism of the men

Women will pick the worst possible man and then blame all men. Even the guy who has a stable job and had no part in creating the life

universally directed at mothers.

The government fucks men (even when they're not the father) and rewards women

Parents have a series of choices to make

And the mother made the first choice. Then she made the second chance.

the baby daddy not present and not paying made the choice to eschew responsibility and bounce

Who mom decided to give the biggest honor to creating that man's child

So why wouldn't it be reasonable to keep banging the drum about men?

Because women are the ones picking these men. The only solution is to let these women suffer so men understand that they need to drive away evil men from their daughters.

Look at this bitch and tell me her genetics deserve to pollute the gene pool. Sorry for the youtube commentator but that's the only video I could find about her

But the most important people in the scenario are, of course, the children. (And to those who just say fuck dem kids, whatever. You're either an asshole or just an unserious person. Or exceptionally stupid. Dk, Dc.)

Again, it was the mother who decided to have a deadbeats child.

Kids are of course put in a somewhat vulnerable situation by the choices of the parents to create and have a baby

Again, who chose the man?

But then they have a parent who fucks off.

see above

And then you also have the child growing up KNOWING that one of their parents - the tightest bond, generally - DNGAF to know them

see above

Yes, that fucks up a child's mind and its development. And it often plays out through their whole life. One of the two most important people in a child's world said, "I don't care if I ruin you, and your mother, too. You're nothing."

And that kid will statistical grow up to cause damage to society at large

They also learn (eventually, hopefully - though it's a sad thing to hope for) that that absent parent is a piece of shit, a coward, AND a fool:

They should then learn that their mother decided this was the best man to be the father.

 

[Doktor Grimm]

who chose the man?

Dawg who abandoned the child?

Look at this bitch and tell me her genetics deserve to pollute the gene pool.

She's sixteen.

I don't disagree with the idea that the mothers can be partially responsible (though it definitely varies depending on the scenario & it's overwhelmingly men who do not step up when they should).

But this line of argument reeks of impotent rage from people who have fallen for the snowbunny meme -- which describes a minority of single mums at best -- and are mad that government gibs are getting in the way of their revenge fantasy. I like @Party Hat Wurmple's proposition. The father who up and left should be forced to sacrifice as much for the kids as the mother, if not more.

 

[Toothp!ck]

Dawg who abandoned the child?

if the mother was smart about chosing a father they wouldn't be in that position in the first place. Society never blames the mother for picking terrible fathers.

it's overwhelmingly men who do not step up when they should).

And it's overwhelming women who continue to pick these men.

government gibs are getting in the way of their revenge fantasy

I just don't think money should go from hard working men (rest assured men will continue paying the overwhelmingly amount of taxes) to support single moms who are shielded from their consequences.

 

[VorpalAnvil-]

I love that every foids "argument" in this thread is "hurr ur smol peepee get laid incel insecure", its like pottery.
Ya know, this problem never existed in all of human history until we adopted hyper individualism, decided everyone was exactly the same, and gave women rights. It would seem the solution is quite apparent, it just takes the political will to enact it. And you can start this process in your own life by simply telling women "No".

 

[Fuck Bankers]

Yes. I meant EVERYTHING you just laid out. Financially rape the dad if he tries to play Deadbeat Dad. Make maximum penalties from the Dad specifically. No more money from the taxpayers. If that means Chad has to drop out of school, get a 9-5 that ruins his life, so be it. I'm perfectly fine with financially raping and ruining deadbeat dads.

While I agree with the sentiment, wouldn't allowing some leeway to allow for a better life for these dads would also allow for better lives for their children?

 

[Spud]

wouldn't allowing some leeway to allow for a better life for these dads

Allowing a man to have a better life is illegal in CURRENT YEAR.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

As far as I'm concerned, the 29 year old NEET gets hate when his only crime is minding his own business and not wanting to participate in our fucked up system. Meanwhile not only does the single mom leach off of the rest of us but her spawn does as well, not to mention that little spawn is more likely to commit crimes, be disruptive in class (fucking your kids over), and more likely to be overtly fucked up in general.

Agreed overall, though with the exception of widows. Republicans are so fucking impractical, cucked, and greedy when it comes to this kind of shit. This is why they lose support, total self-sabotage.

 

[666NASTYFUCKINGFREAK666]

Ya know, this problem never existed in all of human history

bro

 

[smile.jpg]

Just came back to see all the seething I caused

 

[VorpalAnvil-]

bro

Yes, I know its a pedantic comment I made in that aspect. While it has happened several times in Western history, the causes and solutions are always what I mentioned. A great cultural upheaval happens (typically some apocryphal war), women need men again, and shit goes back to the norm of women having chivalry, not rights. There's usually a reason your ancestors did things a certain way.