Skull and Bones - "After ten thousand years in development, I hope it was worth the wait"

[Ughubughughughughughghlug]

There is a very obnoxious narrative in history (academic, pop culture, all of that) right now that pirates and scrappy revolutionaries. And I'm not completely opposed to that, I like the Nassau Republic, I find that stuff interesting, but it's been exaggerated beyond all reason. One dipshit that's popularized it is Colin Woodard, who wrote some other books that are pretty good but still flawed due to his liberal brain AIDS.

For example, they play up how pirates would free slaves, even though oftentimes they would instead sell the slaves themselves, or just kill them. Basically it was just the whims of that crew, but they'll take some instances of it and make that out like it was a thing All Pirates Did and Believed. Or the gay thing, matelotage might have had some faggtry about it, but a lot of those contracts were between men who had WIVES. It wasn't equivalent to a marriage.

And of course most of these men were basically just mercs - private military contractors, literally - that flipped on their nation after they were mass laid off in the wake of the Spanish Succession.

I think talking about the dawn of capitalism and focusing on portraying the Indian Oceans like a "spicepunk" (you know, cyberpunk) world is a cool idea and the best way to use the setting. But don't get me wrong, I don't expect that Ubisoft executed it well at all.

 

[Kankichi Ryotsu]

It's Ubisoft, is it really surprising it's slop? That pirate conduct pop-up is all you need to know.

 

[Snekposter]

It's Ubisoft, is it really surprising it's slop? That pirate conduct pop-up is all you need to know.

Its not that its slop, but its that even by Ubisoft's usual standards its exceptionally terrible slop.

 

[TVB]

Its not that its slop, but its that even by Ubisoft's usual standards its exceptionally terrible slop.

Ubisoft's games are the special kinds of slop. This big name game corpo is the trail mix nuts of slop

 

[Snekposter]

Ubisoft's games are the special kinds of slop. This big name game corpo is the trail mix nuts of slop

And this game is more like pemmican instead of trail mix, except instead of tallow and dried meat its organic, vegan vegetable oil and some hyper-processed meat substitute.

 

[ZMOT]

And this game is more like pemmican instead of trail mix, except instead of tallow and dried meat its organic, vegan vegetable oil and some hyper-processed meat substitute.

that shit would go bad fast tho

 

[Snekposter]

that shit would go bad fast tho

And this game is going to age precisely as well as that vegan pemmican I described, if not even worse than.

 

[SiccDicc]

It's the first season and typically numbers spike with interest, but it doesn't seem to be the case here. They're also implementing FOMO shit as is typical.

 

[ZMOT]

It's the first season and typically numbers spike with interest, but it doesn't seem to be the case here. They're also implementing FOMO shit as is typical.

I'd assume they learned by now by keeping events running and on a loop. it's cheap and easy and would increase long-term value.

otoh that explains why ubisoft wouldn't do it...

 

[SiccDicc]

I'd assume they learned by now by keeping events running and on a loop. it's cheap and easy and would increase long-term value.

otoh that explains why ubisoft wouldn't do it...

One of the reasons Helldivers 2 is so successful is because they don't have FOMO shit. Their battlepasses can be done at any time one at a time. It's not a job or a chore, it's just a game and that makes it fun. Ubisoft is... as you said, stuck in the past and absolutely retarded. There's no innovation in anything they've done in years. This could have been one such opportunity to garner some good will here and get a one up on Sea of Thieves because I believe their shit is limited.

But yeah, Ubisoft would never do that.

 

[ZMOT]

One of the reasons Helldivers 2 is so successful is because they don't have FOMO shit. Their battlepasses can be done at any time one at a time. It's not a job or a chore, it's just a game and that makes it fun. Ubisoft is... as you said, stuck in the past and absolutely retarded. There's no innovation in anything they've done in years. This could have been one such opportunity to garner some good will here and get a one up on Sea of Thieves because I believe their shit is limited.

But yeah, Ubisoft would never do that.

you can see the same effect with granblue relink. it has all the makings of a live-service game, but you can still play it completely offline, no MTX shit (yet, dlc has been announced but that's probably more characters and skins for a fixed price), no gatcha (although item progression ingame is a nice/nasty version of it). you pay 60 bucks, you get a game for 60 bucks.

ubisoft games could work exactly the same way, keeping their value intact by not being tied to a "dead" playerbase soon after launch due to forced multiplayer and their fomo-shit being long over. of course, on one side on paper it increases engagement and sales to not "miss out", however that doesn't work if no one gives a fuck about ubislop in the first place.
but hey, at least no one is able to "pirate" a game no one wants. big win!

 

[The Last Stand]

Correct me if I'm wrong, I believe Skull and Bones allows you to solo play its pirate MMO without compromise. If so, that is the one thing it has going over Sea of Thieves. In a vaccum.

 

[SiccDicc]

Correct me if I'm wrong, I believe Skull and Bones allows you to solo play its pirate MMO without compromise. If so, that is the one thing it has going over Sea of Thieves. In a vaccum.

No, it doesn't.

 

[Ughubughughughughughghlug]

I know AC Odyssey is full of AIDS and doesn't even have shields but is it worth getting if you really want to be a classical pirate?

 

[30+GameOvers]

but hey, at least no one is able to "pirate" a game no one wants. big win!

Talk about irony, a game all about supposedly being a pirate doing everything it can(even to it's own detriment) to combat actual piracy. GabeN said it best, piracy is a service problem, even if the game was free to download off of your favorite cracker site I doubt anyone would want to waste 500GB or whatever on this stale piece of shit.
You know, the game has been out for over a month now and I have heard NOBODY talking about it. It's not even so bad that people are actively shitting on it like with Starfield, Suicide Squad filled that role for them. This is the "it is so bland that nobody even cares how awful it is because we have no expectations" game that comes out several times a year. I wouldn't be surprised if the stores start selling console copies for pennies like they did with Fallout 76 pretty soon.

 

[The Last Stand]

On the bright side, this bemeoth of a game DID help revitalize another Ubisoft title. If you want to be a pirate, play Assassin's Creed IV. That's worthy of something at least.

 

[Almighty Space Duck]

On the bright side, this bemeoth of a game DID help revitalize another Ubisoft title. If you want to be a pirate, play Assassin's Creed IV. That's worthy of something at least.

It also reminds me of all the wasted potential Atlas had.

 

[Michael Wade]

Angry joes review is hilarious. Holy crap I knew it was bad from the beta but this is worse then i thought.

The fatter his face gets the more based he becomes. He cringes hard at the feminism and Goes so far as to call it worse then suicide squad

 

[ZMOT]

Correct me if I'm wrong, I believe Skull and Bones allows you to solo play its pirate MMO without compromise. If so, that is the one thing it has going over Sea of Thieves. In a vaccum.

going by the beta and other ubislop games, you can play it solo. some (small) parts are multiplayer, like certain events (in the beta was apparently a ghost ship you needed several people for, never seen it myself). there are also some "roles" for your ship like tank/heal/dps if you wanna go deeper into multiplayer (group size fittingly was 3).

no idea what the endgame looks like, but I'd assume at that point you're finished with most of the game anyway (like explore and collect everything etc.) which you should be able to do on your own, it would just be a bonus for higher numbers or more fancy cosmetics anyway, so pretty much moot.

You know, the game has been out for over a month now and I have heard NOBODY talking about it. It's not even so bad that people are actively shitting on it like with Starfield, Suicide Squad filled that role for them. This is the "it is so bland that nobody even cares how awful it is because we have no expectations" game that comes out several times a year. I wouldn't be surprised if the stores start selling console copies for pennies like they did with Fallout 76 pretty soon.

that's just means it's "mid" as the kids these days say. nothing to talk about, and even the bad parts aren't so outrageous that anyone would need to vent or make fun of it.
basically like most ubislop games.

all the wasted potential

ubisoft games in a nutshell.
currently finishing breakpoint, and man... there are some good foundations and great ideas in there, but offset by all the "wtf were they thinking"...

 

[Bunny Wigglesworth]

Angry joes review is hilarious. Holy crap I knew it was bad from the beta but this is worse then i thought.

The fatter his face gets the more based he becomes. He cringes hard at the feminism and Goes so far as to call it worse then suicide squad

It really is, gotta hand it to Irritated Ignacio. Christ on a corndog, how do you fuck up a guaranteed money press like this. Angry Jose says “it was a lay-up”, more like putting someone on your shoulders, taking them UP TO THE NET and them STILL boofing the shot. Also, why are over half the pirate crews wahmen? Rhetorical question. Sea Shantys sound stupid being sung by women. All they had to do was take the pirating part of AC4, add more mechanics & content to it.