Speedrunning Thread / Speedrunner Community - GOTTA GO FAST

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Speedrunning only really attracts the most autistic and the most fucked up people in the head. It's the only way you can think to play the same game over and over again for thousands, possibly tens of thousands of hours. A significant portion of your life is being spent not learning a skill. Not working a job. But trying to figure out a way to complete a repetitive task in a video game slightly faster. There's very few speedrunners that are able to garner a significant amount of fame from this.

It's a well known reason why people troon out. Mal-adjusted autists can't really fit in with normal people. But usually with trannies they find a group of people that will constantly assuage them of their delusions. Part of it is probably to get attention too. You're not a CHUD are you? You wouldn't make fun of a tranny streamer would you? If you do, you'll have 100 other trannies banging on your door telling you you're a disgusting human being for criticizing someone for chopping their dick off and getting chest implants that make them look like a life size barbie doll.

I hope AGDQ continues to crash and burn. Maybe some other organization can replace them. People are sick of this shit.
 
GDQ really seems to come and go these days. I haven't heard a peep about it on my TL besides kvetching over people being annoyed by the constant trans rights circle jerking. Not a single notable run in the past few years or even any memes. Roughly 30k viewers on average were watching and it's like no one saw a thing.
 
moocow said:
Anyone expecting a charity organization of any kind (especially in the United States) to actually funnel any money to its professed beneficiaries is in for a big disappointment.

It is considered astonishingly rare for a charity org to boast a (provable) sub-10% "overhead" rate, meaning at least $9 out of every $10 received as donations is actually spent to the direct benefit of the charity's chosen target group. There are others, including a good number of cancer "charities," whose overhead is effectively 100% -- those faggots who sell the pink cancer ribbons have (IIRC) only made token payments/donations to cancer research, victims and survivors in recent years, amounting to less than 1% of the money they take in each year.
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If my memory serves correctly, these guys dont even pass anything on to actual cancer research. They just run 'prevention campaigns'. I remember a guy on /v/ sperging about this exact thing when it was really starting to take off. The money is basically going to help print flyers and leaflets to be dumped in doctors offices and publish insta posts reminding he/she/they to check there balls for lumps.
 
Fire Walk With Me said:
If my memory serves correctly, these guys dont even pass anything on to actual cancer research. They just run 'prevention campaigns'. I remember a guy on /v/ sperging about this exact thing when it was really starting to take off. The money is basically going to help print flyers and leaflets to be dumped in doctors offices and publish insta posts reminding he/she/they to check there balls for lumps.
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Don't forget the political lobbying "donations!"
 
Platonic Ideal said:
this strange hobbit like man named Blueglass that appeared in every video and laughed like a dolphin
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In the animated GIF that has the four people helping Mike Uyama button mash on a controller and it's mosaic-censored to look like they are all jerking him off, Blueglass is second from the right. He is a treasure and I wish I knew what became of him. I hope wherever he is, he is well (and still goes by "he" of course, that was implied with the whole "well" thing).

Fire Walk With Me said:
If my memory serves correctly, these guys dont even pass anything on to actual cancer research. They just run 'prevention campaigns'. I remember a guy on /v/ sperging about this exact thing when it was really starting to take off. The money is basically going to help print flyers and leaflets to be dumped in doctors offices and publish insta posts reminding he/she/they to check there balls for lumps.
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I'm convinced the Prevent Cancer Foundation is just a slush fund or something for people to collect money and do the barest minimum to avoid getting too many people looking in their direction. I don't know if their name is utilitarian or just Somali-level basic English scamming but my assumption is they use it to deflect criticism with shit like "what, you don't want to pReVeNt CaNcEr?!?!" when in reality they're not doing a fucking thing to help. I made this joke elsewhere on the forum, maybe even in this very thread I can't remember, but Tom Green wrote a song about fondling your balls to check for cancer completely free of charge and I guarantee that man's pop culture notoriety did more in the two months where everyone I knew quoted that song than the "Prevent Cancer Foundation" has done in its entire lifetime.
 
Not Funny said:
you're a disgusting human being for criticizing someone for chopping their dick off and getting chest implants that make them look like a life size barbie doll.
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Most of them don't even go that far.
I'd prefer they made the effort to at least pass as a woman so that I'm not forced to acknowledge a fully intact male's delusions or so that my brain at least can mistake them for a chick. A bearded dude in drag with balding, thin hair demanding that I call him a true and honest woman is a lot more disrespectful to me. If you want me to think you're a broad, at least put in the effort to try and trick me.
 
RE: Donation money

Some time ago a GDQ organizer actually replied to a Reddit post [A] about this very thing, which is quite insightful. It reveals, among other things, that GDQ does not donate funds from subscriptions or bits donated during the event after Twitch significantly reduced the cut they got from those, and that the charities actually pay for GDQ to host an event.
When you donate something during the event, it goes directly to the charity, which is also evident when looking at the financial reports of said charities. Thankfully, these have to be made public by the organizations in question.

If we look at PCF's 2024 report we can see that GDQ (titled "Awesome Games") yielded $2,516,886, which roughly tracks with the donation total that year, $2,539,857.21. But it also shows that PCF paid GDQ $445,632 to organize the event.

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Oliver Onions said:
I unsubscribed from all the GDQ channels years ago for this exact reason, around about the time that ProtoMagicalDude started forcing his way into every aspect of the event.

Now I only watch the personal channels of runners I like, none of which have trooned out yet thankfully (although some are on the edge I just know it).
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ZFG thankfully still sounds like his balls couldn't un-descend even with the help of cranes and pulleys.
 
Do Not Touch Me Pls said:
This WILL lead to an extinction event, mark my words.
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I honestly doubt it. You have to remember the Internet is a relatively tiny microcosm of a much bigger picture.

If you judge society by examining any cross-section of the web then yeah we're absolutely fucked, but the vast majority of people are still relatively normal and living normal lives; even a lot of the people claiming to be allies of LGBTHDTV+ degeneracy only pay it lip service and wouldn't lift a finger to actually help them if push came to shove.

I choose to be a Positive Polly and view things like speedrunning and troonism as the same kind of genetic filtering we used to use wars for.
 
BlueCandles said:
Can we please set up some sort of autoban for anyone who unironically uses the word Folks or Y'all in a sentence?
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Hey folx, y'all might like my thread:

Dopey Cunt said:
I have never seen a chinese runner on anything. Even looking through the official speedrunning website, a lot of records are mostly dominated by NA, EU and JP with maybe an occasional Taiwanese thrown in there somewhere.
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Thiletonomics said:
The lack of Koreans is surprising to me as well, given their hyper autistic obsession with video games, i.e. how they made Starcraft Brood War into a Korean national sport at one point. But then again, Korean players/teams only get good when there's money, playerbase, and Government support for it, since they only have large presence in a few games (League of Legends, Brood War, Tekken), but don't have as much presence in other games.
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Now that you mention it, there is a noticeable lack of non-Japanese Asians doing speedrunning. We're not including Asian-Americans which there are some.

Where are the Korean speedrunners? They're famous for being good at Starcraft and Tekken.
Where are the Chinese speedrunners? They're obsessed with gatcha games and there's also some of them in fighting games like King of Fighters.
Where are the Indian speedrunners? There are millions of these bioweapons/locusts flooding the West but I don't recall a single Indian at GDQ. Even their rivals Pakistan has some success in Tekken.

Maybe the speedrunning demographic has a different class/gene of autism.

Tanner Glass said:
Another "runner" running in a category that most people don't run, shocking.

Technically a world record holder in a category he exists in literally by himself and then one in a version no one else has touched in 2 years.

View attachment 8409881View attachment 8409882

Maybe I just hate speedrunning, but this level of a single game having ~40 different leaderboards always makes me so mad.
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Seymour Duncan said:
The stupidly specific categories can be fine if they're highly entertaining gimmicks, but yeah most of the time it's just some jackoff inventing a category to avoid actual competition in the main categories.
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Good observations, the speedrunning community needs to talk about the flood of different speedrunning categories in a single game. What kind of an achievement is being a XYZ Any% world record holder if the rest of the world hasn't played this category? It's like playing basketball where team X is you and team Y is nobody.

Even competent speedrunners like Cosmo Wright was guilty of making up a new category in a Zelda game, only for another autist to take the world record away.

Barry Williams said:
In the animated GIF that has the four people helping Mike Uyama button mash on a controller and it's mosaic-censored to look like they are all jerking him off, Blueglass is second from the right. He is a treasure and I wish I knew what became of him. I hope wherever he is, he is well (and still goes by "he" of course, that was implied with the whole "well" thing).
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I am now filled with a sense of dread. I know nothing about Blueglass apart from his laugh but he looks like the sort of guy who has she/her pronouns now.
 
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