Sperg about comic books here

[Clyde Cash's Left Teste]

Terrible, Question and Bat-dyke solo two Supermen and an entire mind-controlled Justice League.

It’s “Question: All Along the Watchtower,” Ted Kord gets some spotlight so I can’t be mad about that and the League’s management-style for the Watchtower is pretty funny.

Would’ve been fine, not good , but fine if it was just Eradicator or just Cyborg Superman but both is just showing how totally capable lesbians are. Hank and Eradicator are funny though, one’s insane and the other just wants his paycheck (I think Hank was holding the data from the Superman pod over his head) anyway, they’re jerks and it’s charming, especially Eradicator mocking Hank’s increasing loss of control.

So you would be fine with the writer using the two again but not Reene or Batwoman.

Batwoman is an odd character for me. Good design but never really felt like a character besides the military back ground and being a lesbian.

 

[Humble Architect]

So you would be fine with the writer using the two again but not Reene or Batwoman.

Batwoman is an odd character for me. Good design but never really felt like a character besides the military back ground and being a lesbian.

Yeah, they were a fun duo act, literally just the T-1000 and T-800 in supersuits and I would’ve been more……. accepting for a lack of a better word if it wasn’t a “lesbian power” moment. That they’re both legacy characters dabbing on two of my favorites doesn’t help.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

I remember hearing the Earth One books were good for a hot minute, and then got into production hell?

The biggest problem was the refusal to let other artists come in and take over when the main artist was too busy (Except for Superman 3, Shane Davis was fired for being a filthy conservative). Hell, when Strazynski was having eye troubles and decided to stop writing comics, they just cancelled the Superman line rather than continue with another writer. You also had the problem that the writers didn't start the scripts until the book came out and the artists were busy with other projects.

It's a shame because especially Batman and Superman seemed to be ramping up to bigger things, and then were cancelled before they could reach them. Johns admitted the ending to Batman 3 has more than he planned crammed in like the new Arkham building and Robin and Batgirl joining up in a montage because he knew volume 4 was unlikely to happen.

Wonder Woman though was just Grant Morrison philosophizing over bondage, you can skip that.

 

[Neuropol]

All I remember about Superman Earth One was that Jor-El sent him to Earth for revenge against the monster who destroyed Krpton, the Daily Planet was struggling to survive, and Clark was dating a woman in his apartment building whose job was prostitute and (initials were not L.L) edit: she was Lisa Lasalle, still an original character. And Lex got murdered by his wife.

So I guess I remember more than I thought I did, because I started this post with just the revenge thing top of mind.

 

[Humble Architect]

All I remember about Superman Earth One was that Jor-El sent him to Earth for revenge against the monster who destroyed Krpton, the Daily Planet was struggling to survive, and Clark was dating a woman in his apartment building whose job was prostitute and (initials were not L.L) edit: she was Lisa Lasalle, still an original character. And Lex got murdered by his wife.

So I guess I remember more than I thought I did, because I started this post with just the revenge thing top of mind.

I happily forgot about Clark sullying himself with a whore, truly the purity of Krypton will never recover. Billions must be eradicated.

Edit: Oh god I forgot she had the whore star tattoo.

 

[Clyde Cash's Left Teste]

The biggest problem was the refusal to let other artists come in and take over when the main artist was too busy (Except for Superman 3, Shane Davis was fired for being a filthy conservative). Hell, when Strazynski was having eye troubles and decided to stop writing comics, they just cancelled the Superman line rather than continue with another writer. You also had the problem that the writers didn't start the scripts until the book came out and the artists were busy with other projects.

It's a shame because especially Batman and Superman seemed to be ramping up to bigger things, and then were cancelled before they could reach them. Johns admitted the ending to Batman 3 has more than he planned crammed in like the new Arkham building and Robin and Batgirl joining up in a montage because he knew volume 4 was unlikely to happen.

Wonder Woman though was just Grant Morrison philosophizing over bondage, you can skip that.

And now JMS is back writing comics for Marvel.

Batman Earth One was a fun reimagining but they should have had Gary Frank focused on that series and not on Doomsday Clock.

 

[Old King Koaleamos]

Doomsday Clock

Doomsday Clock makes me a bit MATI because I get what they were going for, and I even believe that they could have executed it. It just reads so horrendously executed that it gets me mad.

The entire thing should have been a "52" style event.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

Batman Earth One was a fun reimagining but they should have had Gary Frank focused on that series and not on Doomsday Clock.

Oh fuck me Doomsday Clock. I get that artists want to vary things up occasionally, try different things after they've been working on a book for a while, but he should have just done some quick filler work on another book then come back to Earth One. Because Batman was the highest seller in the series. The first one debuted with 35k copies sold. For a hardcover graphic novel, that is amazing numbers for what it was.

And instead of cracking the whip, DC just let them take three years to get the next book out and six years for the third, then cancelled it because surprise, people don't want to wait half a decade for a GN.

 

[Clyde Cash's Left Teste]

Oh fuck me Doomsday Clock. I get that artists want to vary things up occasionally, try different things after they've been working on a book for a while, but he should have just done some quick filler work on another book then come back to Earth One. Because Batman was the highest seller in the series. The first one debuted with 35k copies sold. For a hardcover graphic novel, that is amazing numbers for what it was.

And instead of cracking the whip, DC just let them take three years to get the next book out and six years for the third, then cancelled it because surprise, people don't want to wait half a decade for a GN.

Like I think Frank could have churned out one every year or two.

 

[Old King Koaleamos]

Oh fuck me Doomsday Clock. I get that artists want to vary things up occasionally, try different things after they've been working on a book for a while, but he should have just done some quick filler work on another book then come back to Earth One. Because Batman was the highest seller in the series. The first one debuted with 35k copies sold. For a hardcover graphic novel, that is amazing numbers for what it was.

And instead of cracking the whip, DC just let them take three years to get the next book out and six years for the third, then cancelled it because surprise, people don't want to wait half a decade for a GN.

DC/Marvel and "decent" managerial choices have been like oil and water for a long time now.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

Like I think Frank could have churned out one every year or two.

Absolutely, they were practically six issue miniseries with a few extra pages added in. Making them annual would have been great for the line, gives the artist more time with the pages and comes out frequently enough to keep people engaged. I wish we could have seen what Johns had planned for the Joker, but I guess we'll see it in the Robert Pattinson Batman movies since they're taking a lot of inspiration from the Earth One books.

 

[FiveStarAce]

What the fuck am i reading... the comic hooked me with engineer batman who still has a mom and now it's just a giant nonstop monster orgy.

 

[Neuropol]

Huge gun, absurd proportions, pouches, no feet--we're dangerously close to full Liefeld here.

 

[DeadwastePrime]

View attachment 8074194

What the fuck am i reading... the comic hooked me with engineer batman who still has a mom and now it's just a giant nonstop monster orgy.

you havent read past this issue where its revealed that specifically didnt happen (his friends get gooned instead) and also welcome to the abomination arc of absolute batman

 

[Stab You in the Back]

I read a couple of "funny" superhero books recently, and I want to sperg about what works and what doesn't.

What doesn't work: Deadpool.

Deadpool sucks. No, really, he's just the worst. He's not funny. He's not clever. His books don't have any stakes because he's invincible. There's no reason to read his stories unless you like to see brutal murder being trivilized, but then, the books I read didn't even have that.

I read the three Spider-Man/Deadpool epic collections containing the whole 50 issue run.

The problem with these comics is that they're too wordy. With the Marvel Method, you have a separation between artist and writer which means that the writer has to use dialogue to tell the jokes. The jokes in these volumes typically consists of Deadpool endlessly vomiting dialogue on every page. Not clever dialogue, mind you. A lot of it is observational, expositional or terrible references to 2010s pop culture. I don't think Deadpool tells a single funny "joke" in any of these 50 issues.

Aside from three or four issues drawn by Chris Bachalo, the art is pretty bland. Its serviceable Marvel 2010s style, and none of it serves the humor.

Compare that to

John Byrne's She-Hulk is a delight. Its not outrageously funny. Byrne is an old man, so a lot of the jokes are the same hacky shit anyone who watched television in the 90s would have heard a million times before. But because Byrne was pulling double duty as artist and writer, he's able to use art to tell just as many jokes as the dialogue. Its a shame that Byrne is such a shithead he couldn't manage ten fucking issues without flouncing, because the book is genuinely fun, funny and entertaining in a way Spider-Man/Deadpool never manages to be.

If you weren't aware, Byrne was pissed off about a She-Hulk graphic novel (which also appears in this first epic collection), that he quit the book after six or so issues. The graphic novel is god awful garbage*, but its not worth ragequitting over.

*She-Hulk tries to stop an abortion clinic bombing by removing a bomb FROM A SAFE and using her body to shield the blast, which results in the abortion clinic being completely destroyed. This somehow causes Jen to want to be inseminated by Wyatt Wingfoot. But before she can drain his balls, they end up getting involved in some retarded indian shit that involves a magic basket. Like I said, god awful garbage.

 

[Clyde Cash's Left Teste]

Byrne was pissed off about a She-Hulk graphic novel

Good then Byrne comes back a few years later and does like 20 more issues

 

[Polyboros2]

Dick Grayson Batman breaking the morale of a Blackgate riot taking down their leader. What an absolutely amazing page.



After finding out about comichubfree from here, I've decided to go back and read some of the old comics that I just knew about but never read. I decided a good jumping on point for Batman was Knightfall, thinking of it as a soft reboot. Been enjoying it a lot, but I've been following a TPB upload, and after it ends I'll need to track the different comics individually.



It's there a good resource of what each company released monthly going back 30 years. I didn't have much luck searching for it. I'd like to follow the comics as they were released and maybe check out different stuff as it was being published historically. The TPB left off I think a chunk of Bruce's recovery, I suspect in Robin's comic.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

It's there a good resource of what each company released monthly going back 30 years. I didn't have much luck searching for it. I'd like to follow the comics as they were released and maybe check out different stuff as it was being published historically. The TPB left off I think a chunk of Bruce's recovery, I suspect in Robin's comic.

Comic Vine is what I use, it tells you all the comics in a run and when they came out. But it doesn't list crossovers and sometimes it can be hard finding a specific volume because of all the foreign presses and the search just sometimes being fucky. But it's the best resource I've been able to find so far.

 

[TheOtherOne]

What doesn't work: Deadpool.

Deadpool sucks. No, really, he's just the worst. He's not funny. He's not clever. His books don't have any stakes because he's invincible. There's no reason to read his stories unless you like to see brutal murder being trivilized, but then, the books I read didn't even have that.

Finally someone said this, all the people I've seen hype up Deadpool as super funny and amazing (same as the recent Deadpool movies) and it's just all Reddit-tier "words words words" and dull jokes.

(his friends get gooned instead)

I'm hoping DC executives won't just turn them into basically the same villains from the mainline universe, otherwise we're just reading normal Batman with a few changes. Absolute still isn't too interesting overall to herald a new coming of DC, if it fails eventually like Marvel's new Ultimate Universe I'll laugh.

 

[Humble Architect]

I remember on /co/ (awful place) when there’d be threads set in a hypothetical universe where DC and Marvel are “Amalgam Comics” and it’s all in one universe and anons discussed storylines in this fictional continuity. Most of it was shitposts but some were good ideas.

“Ultimate Superman” being found by a Yellowstone Kevin Costner knockoff, Avengers initially being a government-sanctioned alternative to the League in the vein of Ultimates, Superman fulfilling the role Doc Strange used to have as Savage Hulk’s role-model, Captain Atom and the Cold War heroes being a “failed generation,” Captain America’s program yielding Deathstroke, Wonder Woman in the Invaders, Namor, Oceanmaster and Aquaman being a very fucked up version of the Baratheon boys, Gamma radiation causing Grundy’s immortality, Injustice ending with Hulk vs Superman and the Devil mercy-killing Clark.

Good shit from an awful board.

Point being, “Ultimate” 1, for all its flaws still did the job, those versions refreshed the game, evolved into the MCU versions and the changes are still mainstays. Captain America is superhuman rather than peak-human, Nick being Sam Jackson, Thor’s supremacy on the power rankings being undisputed (ignoring fat Thor), Aunt May not bring decrepit, sleeker Iron Man, X-Men having dirty laundry.

You think Ultimate 2 is gonna have that sort of apotheosis? No