SPRING TORRID HAUL!!!!! - 05/22/19

[Dax Rambo]

This troll is too flipping hilarious. I think what she means by "highly requested haul," is that she is giving the farmers our predictions. How nice of her.

 

[Dry Gorl]

I think there's no weigh in because she filmed this on the same day as the last video. She's talking about the "two men in her bathroom" again. (I guess they could have taken more than a day to fix the floor destroyed by our dainty gorl, but still.) She's so lazy. She was forced to get off pillow mountain because she was embarrassed to be seen by the repairman in her room, so she thought she might as well film as much garbage content as possible in that 1-2 days to fill the rest of the month.

 

[Hamberlard Raid]

I think there's no weigh in because she filmed this on the same day as the last video. She's talking about the "two men in her bathroom" again. (I guess they could have taken more than a day to fix the floor destroyed by our dainty gorl, but still.) She's so lazy. She was forced to get off pillow mountain because she was embarrassed to be seen by the repairman in her room, so she thought she might as well film as much garbage content as possible in that 1-2 days to fill the rest of the month.

She most likely rewarded herself with multiple binges in one day after such a hard day's work.

 

[Meat Poultry Veg]

When she enters the Forced Nudity Arc, will we still have Torrid hauls?

 

[Owlflaps]

I wouldn't call 'loving' ruining your body with all the excess weight and fat. Love it despite imperfections, I agree, but not the way you've significantly destroyed it.

I’d love my body too if it gave me 10k a month. But would the 10k be worth it if I looked like a bag of melting lard left in the front seat of a broken down car in the summer?

 

[IslamicContentental Belt]

Does she just throw away her clothes when she's done wearing them? I am sure they are really disgusting but she does know she can wash and re-wear them right?

Maybe she doesn't get the wash part since she's been wearing the same unwashed dingy bra for seven years.

 

[Optavia Sales Rep]

"...because I just don't wear them really anymore."

Amber is getting rid of all her stud earrings because they can't fit on her fat fucking earlobes any more.


Edit: That watermelon pattern is so close to the strawberry patterned shirt she wore last video that I had to double check

 

[SmileyTimeDayCare]

Does she just throw away her clothes when she's done wearing them? I am sure they are really disgusting but she does know she can wash and re-wear them right?

Maybe she doesn't get the wash part since she's been wearing the same unwashed dingy bra for seven years.

The problem is that you need a specialized washing machine to launder a sail sized piece of cloth.

 

[Snusmumriken]

When she enters the Forced Nudity Arc, will we still have Torrid hauls?

No doubt about it. It doesn't matter to Amber if she will/can use what she buys, what matters is it's kyOOOt

 

[PiggyPie]

Why have clothes when you can't leave the house?

 

[Hamberlard Raid]

Amber is getting rid of all her stud earrings because they can't fit on her fat fucking earlobes any more.

Do you think it is because her earlobes are too deep from all the fat gain or is it because she needs massive hoops to maintain her dainty image?

I’d love my body too if it gave me 10k a month. But would the 10k be worth it if I looked like a bag of melting lard left in the front seat of a broken down car in the summer?

The craziest thing about this is that the 10k figure we have citing for the longest time is not even valid anymore!

She was about to recover from the early April ShrimpGate disaster but then she came back with yet another indignant "Eat With Me" video and her subs tanked again. It seems she has reached a plateau in terms of exploiting her super morbid obesity for money.

 

[Concerned Vagino-American]

Wow. Revolutionary. I'm so glad our gorl is finally doing something she's never done before.

Do you mean take a shower? Maybe now I will watch to see those stretch-marked B cups.

 

[Optavia Sales Rep]

Do you think it is because her earlobes are too deep from all the fat gain or is it because she needs massive hoops to maintain her dainty image?

Six of one, half dozen of the other. She's trashing all the studs with shallow (shorter) posts because her earlobes are too deep (thick).

Dangling earrings are meant to elongate your facial profile, especially when you wear your hair up. Amber wears her hair up because she never washes it, and large, tacky earrings are an easy way to help balance a round face.

 

[Snusmumriken]

I seriously can't get over these butt ugly bedsheets. Torrid offers nothing but the most uninspired designs that are way too juvenile for their adult clientele--no wonder Amber loves them so much. It's a perfect match for her boring, deluded personality.

 

[UW 411]

I mean it's in the name, of course horrid- I mean Torrid have hideous, cheap, ugly tarps for their manatee-shirt wearing customers. Do they get worse as the sizes go up though? These are some real trashy and hideous patterns and nobody, absolutely nobody is focusing on the terribly unflattering cuts on these hamplanets, so you'd think they'd at least use cute prints and designs for 'em?

It's happening, isn't it? I'm going all 'fashion at every size', aren't I?
I just think it's odd that a supermega plus-sized retailer makes the clothes uglier for their most dedicated seambusters.

I mean why not just call it a day an sew some nice curtains or quilt covers together at that point? ayyy.

 

[むらさき]

I can't stop picturing her on a trapeze now.

 

[Long time lurker]

"the top is black but the bottom is also black"

Anything to stretch the video long enough...

"spring look book videos"

A what?! What is a book video?

Does she just throw away her clothes when she's done wearing them? I am sure they are really disgusting but she does know she can wash and re-wear them right?

I suspect that many of her clothes get torn when she (tries to) put them on. Others might only come off by tearing them up.

 

[Hamberlard Raid]

I can't stop picturing her on a trapeze now.

Photoshop wizards please get on it! I will shower you in all the reacts your heart desires.

 

[Wilford Brimley]

I think this video is old. And two, spaghetti straps, yaay, now we get to see the 2014 bra under a spaghetti strap. Made my whole Wednesday.

 

[Hamberlard Raid]

Anything to stretch the video long enough...

A what?! What is a book video?

I suspect that many of her clothes get torn when she (tries to) put them on. Others might only come off by tearing them up.

A lookbook video is basically a compilation/showcase of some of the outfits one would wear in a season. They are normally highly edited videos with intense background music containing a wide variety of shots and angles of varying outfits and ensembles. Typically they are used to promote a brand/sponsorship, could you imagine Albert doing one for Torrid??!! Mind you, her "lookbook" videos would probably just be "try-on" hauls but under a different title. She does not have the skills nor the editing abilities to produce any video that is anything above multiple clips nonsensically jammed together.
For reference, this is a typical lookbook video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUmKehi_9hI