Star Trek - Space: The Final Frontier

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Judge Holden said:
Aren't you forgetting something?
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I'm talking the cheap pajama uniforms and mandress era.

You vill wear ze skant.
You vill let ze dolphin crew members rape you
You vill look ze other vay ven picard stabs meester jack crusher with ze ice pick.
And you vill be happy

Jokes aside yeah, I want the absolute late 80s new-age assault on the senses that was Season 1 TNG to be brought back in full force. That shit is like 1st Edition Warhammer 40k in terms of satisfying visual cheese.....and god do I wanna see these figurative, conceptual, and oh so very literal niggers make a comeback
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That was a good episode
 
Judge Holden said:
You vill wear ze skant.
You vill let ze dolphin crew members rape you
You vill look ze other vay ven picard stabs meester jack crusher with ze ice pick.
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You vill cry during ze Burnham monologue
You vill not mock Tilly's labored breathing
You vill laugh at ze Rick & Morty ensigns
You vill feel ze pathos of Jean-Luc robot
You vill cheer at ze human Spock
You vill applaud ze musical episode
 
Judge Holden said:
Given how much I myself have sperged out about the early TNG era smug pacifist peacenik Federation and how it unironically works setting shit up going forwards despite how fucking insufferable it was in practice and how many others seem to have the same view on things, it would have been neat if we got a series set in the years running up to the timeframe of Season 1 of TNG, similar to how SNW takes place in the runup to TOS.
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In my 'tism Trek fanfiction, the setting is that a militaristic Andorian becomes President of the Federation following the Dominion War. He is politically controversial, as one might expect given the political climates of TNG and DS9. The stories follow the crew of an upgraded Defiant-class ship - one of many commissioned to keep the peace that the Federation earned. The commander is a guy who made his career as a tactical officer during the Dominion War, so he's a wartime officer that occasionally has to deal with classic Trek shenanigans. They do one tour in the Cardassian/Bajoran sector before things heat up with the Romulans and they do a second tour over there. It ends when Picard runs for President on a platform of peace, wins, the crew's mission ends due to the political changes, and they're all reassigned after a "mission accomplished."

Romulus is never destroyed (that decision was retarded), Bajor joins the Federation, and Cardassia is rebuilding with three major factions: a party that is pro-Federation, a pro-reform party that wants an independent Cardassia, and a party that wants to return to the old ways (which has many old, powerful leaders and also receives clandestine support from the Romulans). The Federation and Klingons are still separate, but closer allies than ever. Kira runs DS9, she works closely with Garak who enters politics with the pro-Federation party in Cardassia, and Sisko has long since returned from the wormhole. He retires from Starfleet, settles as a farmer on Bajor, and raises his child with Kasidy. He has literally zero interest in anything else, having fulfilled his literal destiny. Shakaar is still First Minister.

Inb4 @Captain Syrup gives me Autism stickers.
 
Fatsuit Shinji said:
Which one, since Star Trek Online have already made a bunch of upgraded Deflant variants?
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I didn't play Star Trek Online so I never thought about it that much. I do have it in my notes somewhere that, similar to STO lore, Jake Sisko becomes a successful reporter and author in his own right. Some of the STO lore is cool. Also, Nog becomes a fucking badass captain, because Aron Eisenberg deserves it.
 
Hey Johnny Bravo said:
I didn't play Star Trek Online so I never thought about it that much. I do have it in my notes somewhere that, similar to STO lore, Jake Sisko becomes a successful reporter and author in his own right. Some of the STO lore is cool. Also, Nog becomes a fucking badass captain, because Aron Eisenberg deserves it.
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I only mention STO since Paramount have been using it for new ship classes in their KurtzTrek.
 
Judge Holden said:
This of course is with the very optimistic assumption that some brand new fuckin consultancy induced gimmick will not be crowbarred in and dialled up to a thousand as part of a wider attempt to brute force said gimmick into becoming currentyear norm the way wokeshit/DEI was until recently

As for what such a gimmick would be, I cannot say for sure.....but I have some real fuckin bleak suspicions based on my schizophrenic reading of social/cultural gimmicks used to prop up execrable garbage in media (and everything fucking else for that matter) over the past couple decades and what I have noticed hit something of an uptick in terms of projects announced and shit being pushed by algorithms. I don't want to call it just yet, as I am fully aware I am sounding like some nigga convinced that the antichrist is coming because of the patterns he sees in cereal packet design here, but if you want a clue where I genuinely fear shit might be headed then I will postulate that The Boys might one day seen in a similar light to The Big Bang Theory. Not as one of the last unfunny canned laughter sitcoms of the late 00s, but as a harbinger for a cultural fucking nightmare to come.

If I am right....and I really fucking hope I aint....then when the time comes that this shit manifests in Star Trek we may learn to miss the days of Michael Burnham
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I don't know anything about Big Bang Theory other than it's been awful whenever I've watched it. What exactly did it augur?
 
E. Knee as Weapon - Cont. said:
I don't know anything about Big Bang Theory other than it's been awful whenever I've watched it. What exactly did it augur?
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The various niches of "nerd/geek culture" becoming normie mainstream and fashionable for both shitty celebs and the untermensch strain that would eventually come to be known as "influencers" not to mention helping fuckstart boomers swarming the internet
 
E. Knee as Weapon - Cont. said:
I don't know anything about Big Bang Theory other than it's been awful whenever I've watched it. What exactly did it augur?
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It was the rise of "geek chic", where it suddenly became cool to be a geek or a nerd, it stoped being a subject of mockery. It brought a lot of fake geek girls (what anime fans call "tourists"), people who love the idea of random geek or nerd IP but hate everything about it (to the point of never reading, watching or playing it).

Hey Johnny Bravo said:
That is possibly the only cool thing Kurtzman Trek has done.
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I don't know, the guy who designed them made some ugly shit in Kurtzman Trek.
 
Judge Holden said:
, it would have been neat if we got a series set in the years running up to the timeframe of Season 1 of TNG, similar to how SNW takes place in the runup to TOS.
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Now see, a GOOD section 31 series would have taken place in that era. It would have looked at them dealing with the bluegill threat and when that gets resolved, it shakes them up so much they go off the rails to become what we know of in DS9.
 
Judge Holden said:
Ya know it is genuinely worrying that we are all developing such accurate gaydars we can glimpse a single photo of some nigger in klingon makeup and know he takes it in the ass
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It's just pattern recognition. A lot of the progressive woke shit is just like an algorithm as that is necessary for the cult group think. So it makes the same choices constantly Which is why woke shit is extremely boring and tiresom. You can always tell the choices they have to make.

Black character, that already leans on gay because they need to break those bucks. Then just looking at the body type and physique. We live in an era where there are more defined body types. People are fat. People who are skinny fat. People who work out, people who don't and the rare few who stay thin. He's an actor, thin, doesn't lift. Faggot.
 
Screamer_2 said:
It's just pattern recognition. A lot of the progressive woke shit is just like an algorithm as that is necessary for the cult group think. So it makes the same choices constantly Which is why woke shit is extremely boring and tiresom. You can always tell the choices they have to make.

Black character, that already leans on gay because they need to break those bucks. Then just looking at the body type and physique. We live in an era where there are more defined body types. People are fat. People who are skinny fat. People who work out, people who don't and the rare few who stay thin. He's an actor, thin, doesn't lift. Faggot.
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Elim-Garak-Star-Trek-Deep-Space-Nine.webp

Add a "My dear doctor..." to the beginning of your post, remove the swearing, and you could have dialogue from the lost DS9 episode where Garak and Bashir get sent back to 2025 LA.
 
Hey Johnny Bravo said:
Sisko has long since returned from the wormhole.
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They imply he's gonna get let out eventually, but there's something a little unsatisfying about just farting him out and him carrying on with his life more or less as he would have had he never been sucked into the wormhole to live with the prophets to begin with. It's like he's supposed to do some big destiny bullshit or something, maybe save the universe, I don't know. If there was gonna be another large galaxy spanning conflict likely he would be in the thick of it, doing some mystical emissary shit. Personally I'd just keep him there, he's gonna play a role in Star Trek ragnarok, a story if I had my way I'd probably never see written.
 
Farmholio said:
They imply he's gonna get let out eventually, but there's something a little unsatisfying about just farting him out and him carrying on with his life more or less as he would have had he never been sucked into the wormhole to live with the prophets to begin with. It's like he's supposed to do some big destiny bullshit or something, maybe save the universe, I don't know. If there was gonna be another large galaxy spanning conflict likely he would be in the thick of it, doing some mystical emissary shit. Personally I'd just keep him there, he's gonna play a role in Star Trek ragnarok, a story if I had my way I'd probably never see written.
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His destiny was to deal with the Pah-Wraiths, restore Bajor, and be the Emissary. The Prophets brought him to the Celestial Temple to rest, recuperate, and for what is essentially training. After that, he becomes the full Emissary, which I imagine is Bajor-specific and only useful to the Federation for learning about the Prophets. The Prophets didn't give a fuck about the Dominion War.
 
Hey Johnny Bravo said:
His destiny was to deal with the Pah-Wraiths, restore Bajor, and be the Emissary. The Prophets brought him to the Celestial Temple to rest, recuperate, and for what is essentially training. After that, he becomes the full Emissary, which I imagine is Bajor-specific and only useful to the Federation for learning about the Prophets. The Prophets didn't give a fuck about the Dominion War.
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so its gonna be like benjamin sisko flying around with superman like powers, and michael burnam in the iron angel power suit flying around shooting lasers, and robot cyborg picard going on adventures with a crew of sweaty women
 
Judge Holden said:
Ya know it is genuinely worrying that we are all developing such accurate gaydars we can glimpse a single photo of some nigger in klingon makeup and know he takes it in the ass
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Having gaydar basically means you're gay. You are gay and you have a mystical sixth sense for fellow fudgepackers. I guess we just have to cope with this. It's the curse that comes with having gaydar. You actually have to be gay to have it!
 
Sheriff Mike Chitwood said:
so its gonna be like benjamin sisko flying around with superman like powers, and michael burnam in the iron angel power suit flying around shooting lasers, and robot cyborg picard going on adventures with a crew of sweaty women
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No, it's more like if Jesus came back with a shitload of extra cheat codes from God and all he did was hang out in the local park playing with model boats and telling everyone how everything's gonna be okay.
 
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