Star Trek - Space: The Final Frontier

[Ultraman Orb Dark]

This gets even more mindboggling if you remember that a good portion of the crew consists of Maquis. You know, people who by that point in time know what it's like to fight against assholes that want to take their stuff. I wonder how the people back on the space mall would handle that stuff...

Oh, that's right, they kicked the shit out of Gowron's troops when they tried to take over DS9.

You forget that this group of Maquis is led by Chakotay, a man who somehow believes that territory isn't worth fighting over, yet somehow joined a group of people fighting for terriory.

 

[Captain Syrup]

View attachment 8375747
Oh, that's right, they kicked the shit out of Gowron's troops when they tried to take over DS9.

You can't put Maquis in the same league as Jadzia turning into John Wick.



And Bajorans canonically are a species who get their asses beat all the time. They only survive the big assault because of a Cardassian snitch (irony) and Worf being a gigantic nerd who’s memorized every Klingon war maneuver.

 

[Curzon Dax-sama]

You forget that this group of Maquis is led by Chakotay, a man who somehow believes that territory isn't worth fighting over, yet somehow joined a group of people fighting for terriory.

Can we call him Schizotay?

You can't put Maquis in the same league as Jadzia turning into John Wick.

It generally makes me wonder what the DS9 cast would do if they had somehow been trapped in the DQ aboard the Voyager.

 

[Miller]

more of the hell that is ST:A

https://youtube.com/watch?v=yPcoFhTf24g
Looks like DS9 didn't escape after all as "The Sisko" and what happened to him features in the plot line. I guess the show leader saw that all the other series material had been consumed and so now DS9 is on the menu! When in doubt just start throwing in old character the stupid fans love, that will make them watch us right?

>when the female Jem'hadar starts talking

 

[Ultraman Orb Dark]

Can we call him Schizotay?

I was thinking Fraudkotay, but that rolls off the tongue better.

 

[Mussolini’s Merkin]

>be Ransom
>roll any random number
>Janeway takes over your ship, because from her perspective it's a day that ends on -y, and the universe only exists to entertain her
>Janeway feeds your crew to the space-rapedolphins you converted into fuel and that's a big no-no for someone who made an alliance with the Borg and fucked over billions of actual people
>Janeway will put some of the survivors of your crew into the space-can forever, because they dared to follow you this far
>have to commit suicide

This is my least favorite episode of Voyager (okay I know that's not saying much) but good Lord it infuriates me.

You meet the only other Starfleet vessel in the quadrant, one that got screwed over far worse than your own ship, one that had to make incredibly touch choices to survive, and you feed them to literal (space) sharks because of a directive that you have seem are more of a suggestion yourself. Drives me crazy.

This gets even more mindboggling if you remember that a good portion of the crew consists of Maquis. You know, people who by that point in time know what it's like to fight against assholes that want to take their stuff. `

It was a massive mistake by the Voyager writers not incorporating the Maquis more. You've got a bunch of guerilla fighters as part of your ship and you suddenly find yourself behind enemy lines and away from any kind of supply, what a great set up to see how a Star Fleet crew would adapt and overcome. They take this idea and do precisely nothing with it. Guess you have to make more time for Seven walking around in a skin-tight suit!

 

[Drag-on Knight 91873]

This is my least favorite episode of Voyager (okay I know that's not saying much) but good Lord it infuriates me.

You meet the only other Starfleet vessel in the quadrant, one that got screwed over far worse than your own ship, one that had to make incredibly touch choices to survive, and you feed like the to literal (space) sharks because of a directive that you have seem are more of a suggestion yourself. Drives me crazy.

I both agree and disagree at the same time. I disagree because the Equinox as a show would have been better, but I agree that the show that uses that exact premise is the Battlestar Galactica remake, which I criticize.

 

[Dragged Into Sunlight]

Jellico remains the most competent Starfleet captain of the TNG to VOY timeframe. The first thing he did after Picard was sent to count lights with Madred was... changing the access codes so that Evek or any of the other spoonheads couldn't pull shit on him later with information they tortured out of Picard.

Chain of Command shows how in reality Star Fleet and the Federation would get their asses kicked constantly if they had such a pacifist attitude. Troi and Riker broke down immediately when someone tried to enforce discipline and were outright defiant because he didn't ask them to do things nicely enough. And that's right after Data locked out the transporter when Picard was about to die because he decides that some industrial robots constituted life because they were programmed to problem solve.

more of the hell that is ST:A

https://youtube.com/watch?v=yPcoFhTf24g
Looks like DS9 didn't escape after all as "The Sisko" and what happened to him features in the plot line. I guess the show leader saw that all the other series material had been consumed and so now DS9 is on the menu! When in doubt just start throwing in old character the stupid fans love, that will make them watch us right?

I've got so,e bad news. Picardo is back as the EMH in Academy. They're still using him 900 years later for some reason.

You can't put Maquis in the same league as Jadzia turning into John Wick.

View attachment 8375845

And Bajorans canonically are a species who get their asses beat all the time. They only survive the big assault because of a Cardassian snitch (irony) and Worf being a gigantic nerd who’s memorized every Klingon war maneuver.

They really needed to think up a better motivation for the Maquis. It's not like those barren planets were some paradise they had lived on for generations. Their motivation was paper thin.

 

[Captain Syrup]

Picardo is back as the EMH in Academy. They're still using him 900 years ago for some reason.

I don’t know if I’d even call that news. “News” implies a break from the established order of things, and Trek has functionally been a jobs program for washed-up Trek actors for my entire life. Picardo coming back is especially unsurprising. He’s in a dead heat with Brent Spiner for “legacy character no one missed."

This is my least favorite episode of Voyager (okay I know that's not saying much) but good Lord it infuriates me.

If memory serves, the first half of "Equinox" was Ron Moore's idea. By part two, there’s this palpable exhaustion in Moore's writing, similar to what happened to Michael Piller in the back half of "Basics". I can’t think of another example where it’s that naked. Like, usually they at least pretend there’s a plan. The only other time I’ve seen it that happen is Star Wars. Rian Johnson’s like, "This mythology is dumb” And then Abrams shows up like, “nuh uh you're dumb".

 

[Dragged Into Sunlight]

Can we talk about Neelix? I feel he's the most unfairly maligned character in the series. He was rough in the beginning (just like Voyager in general at the beginning) but after he broke off from Kes he became onenof the bright spots in the show. He wasn't some JarJar-tier annoying character he's been characterized as, he was an upbeat ray of sunshine Inna show that could be pretty dreary.

Part of the issue with Trek is the tech is advancing to the point that you just can’t have a plot anymore. In the Berman era-you have at least three or four new kinds of FTL being developed-transwarp, artificial wormholes, I want to say jaunt drives(that’s in the novels I think?), and something else I can’t remember.*

Heck, Voyager had an episode with actual time cops from the 29th century. And apparently the federation was exploring other galaxies by the 26th century.

Before discovery ruined it all of course.

Anyway-people complain about technobabble but in the trek setting, tech is just that advanced that it can solve the problems in the setting 4 times out of five.

As a writer-you need conflict to actually have stories, and Trek’s utopianism(most problems solved, humans are genuinely more ethical, compassionate and curious than they are now) makes coming up with problems hard.

And most writers just don’t want to work within a framework like that-not even DS9’s Moore.

*Now I remember, slipstream.

I'm in the tail end of rewatching TNG and I was starting to think the same thing. Replicators, transporters, and holodecks had be set up to the point they could solved 99% of the problems with humanity. In the kid episode, they established that they could probably make people functionally immortal. The computer can create sentient life as established with Moriarty. Scotty survived 75 years hanging out in the transporter buffer with no ill effects, Barclay got super intelligence and was able to instantly move the Enterprise to center of the galaxy to meet the Cytherians who then shared their tech with them so they should have the ability to travel the entire galaxy easily. You could set the computer to instantly recognize that someone unauthorized was on the ship and beam them out. They're essentially god-like powers. I was annoyed at the Ferengi episode because it was ridiculous to think a half-dozen Ferengi could take over the ship. It should have instantly recognized that intruders had teleported on the ship and contained them or teleported them into space or at least disabled the weapons.

 

[William Murderface]

I wouldn't have made Neelix as comic relief. I would have made him like Hawkeye from Last of the Mohicans. He's their Indian guide, he knows his way around that end of space, at least for a while, and while he's generally stoic, there's a genuine warmth in him that comes out. Jokes, witty remarks, he goes out of his way to help his new friends, and he is absolutely terrifying when he gets into kill mode. But the further the series goes on, the less he knows about the area of space they are in, to the point that he starts taking real risks to gain knowledge, wonders about his place among the crew, and maybe even covers up how little he knows at times.

 

[Tasty Tatty]

Is there a better example of liberal suicidal empathy than the episode "Borg" with 3 of 5? Crusher insisting that they must save the borg drone? There's a race out there that has killed and enslaved billions and they're hand-wringing over having the chance to destroy them? Come the fuck on.

It fits the themes we saw earlier on Measure of a Man and Pen Pal, about whether they have or not the right to decide the fate of other beings or if they can qualify them as such. Like, how Pulaski says they need to save that planet because they (paraphrasing) mean something and Worf says they mean something for Data. As he's not personally involved, he really doesn't mind and he's not making emotional decisions. It's until they listen to the audio that they see them as living beings worthy of living.

I, Borg is very similar. They all are talking about how much they don't care for the drone until they interact with the drone and realise he didn't choose to be a Borg. And, most importantly, Borgs can be "cured", which gives the Federation another option for defeating them (which wasn't really explored). Guinan said you couldn't talk with them, but turns out you can, sorta.

It sounds a lot like what our liberals do, but not completely. Our liberals think that because they met some Arab Muslim whose rich family sent to US to study and he doesn't act like a barbarian, they all are like this. The D crew never stops thinking the Borg are dangerous not they think that Hugh will make them all change from one day to the other. They never stop seeing them as dangerous enemies and they definitely don't send a convoy to extend their hand to them. They know Hugh is an anomaly they can exploit, even after deciding not sending the virus, they send him expecting he can spread the ideas of individuality; our libtards would believe that Hugh is the norm and all Borgs are like him right now and something stupid like inviting them all for negotiations.

 

[William Murderface]

The thing is Picard is completely in the wrong over Hugh. They are at war. It sucks that Hugh would have to die or whatever if the fractal trap works, but how many ships has Picard blown up over the years that had crewman who didn't want involved in their national politics but just happened to be the wrong species or wear the wrong uniform?

Not to mention, wasn't he actually ordered to go along with the plan and simply refused? Again, you're at war, a war for survival no less, since the Borg don't seem to want to negotiate and have no other end goal than the complete absorption of the Federation.

 

[Drag-on Knight 91873]

The thing is Picard is completely in the wrong over Hugh. They are at war. It sucks that Hugh would have to die or whatever if the fractal trap works, but how many ships has Picard blown up over the years that had crewman who didn't want involved in their national politics but just happened to be the wrong species or wear the wrong uniform?

Not to mention, wasn't he actually ordered to go along with the plan and simply refused? Again, you're at war, a war for survival no less, since the Borg don't seem to want to negotiate and have no other end goal than the complete absorption of the Federation.

Nechayev found out about it later and mad that Picard made a unilateral decision, not that he disobeyed an order because that order was never explicitly given.

 

[Captain Syrup]

I wouldn't have made Neelix as comic relief. I would have made him like Hawkeye from Last of the Mohicans. He's their Indian guide, he knows his way around that end of space, at least for a while

You watch the VOY pilot and you’re like, “Oh I see, this guy Neelix is supposed to be a fun space scammer."



Between "Caretaker" and S01E02, someone at Paramount clearly shit their pants. Fan are like, “Well actually Neelix is a mythological constant, like Tom Bombadil.” It's like dude, he’s just a guy with bad hair who won’t leave.



And the funniest part is they’re trapped. They have to keep referencing "Caretaker", but there is no universe where the later versions of these characters would do anything like that. At least on STD when they killed Georgieu and Lorca, you could see the dumb little breadcrumbs.

 

[Clown College 2nd Year]

He's their Indian guide, he knows his way around that end of space, at least for a while, and while he's generally stoic, there's a genuine warmth in him that comes out.

This is what they tried to do with Chakotay except it turned out really bad. Fake Native American consultant and all that.

 

[UnKillFill]

Can we talk about Neelix? I feel he's the most unfairly maligned character in the series. He was rough in the beginning (just like Voyager in general at the beginning) but after he broke off from Kes he became onenof the bright spots in the show. He wasn't some JarJar-tier annoying character he's been characterized as, he was an upbeat ray of sunshine Inna show that could be pretty dreary.

He was grossly incompetent at pretty much everything he claimed to be an expert in... (Including cooking) and he literally got multiple people killed because they believed in his bullshit (Also his cooking almost destroyed the ship with cheese once). If he didn't want to be compared to Jar Jar then he shouldn't have been Jar Jar (yes I know he was technically pre- Jar Jar. My point still stands)

 

[WonderWino]

And why stop at Sisko when it's not unlikely the Dax-worm is still around somewhere? Why not have a Bashir-EMH or a descendant of Worf they could shit on?

Don't give them ideas. I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised if they pulled that. I mean they did do the bashir EMH at one point already, did have descendants of worf who he fucked over by not killing when they requested him to so they wouldn't die by being erased from history and a future dax was hinted at in an episode of enterprise as captain of the enterprise J

Plus they already pulled that shit with garak and bashir so I wouldn't put it past them to do a hologram version of them as a couple either

He was good in Hair, and he pops up in Twin Peaks for one scene and I’m punching the air like my team just scored.

He also showed up in a really bizarre episode of the outer limits back in 1995 where he's some kind of alien that teaches a lesson to some guy that got out of prison after running a scam and intended to kill his former boss as revenge at a christmas party.....by somehow replacing everybody he shot seconds before (and without anyone noticing) by some kind of manufactured humans with dolphin brains (yes, really, they actually explicitly say this in the episode) and spends the rest of the episode eating soup, drinking and getting himself arrested in the guys place after somehow switching bodies while he was in the bathroom

Outer limits does some weird shit sometimes but that one was high up there on the what the fuck were they smoking when they came up with it scale

 

[Captain Manning]

Tasha is supposed to be Proto-Ro Laren, right? She’s from the murder-rape planet. She grew up in a Mad Max scenario. Anyway, she immediately submits to this ooga-booga spear chucking villain.

Fun fact: That episode didn't develop the way it was supposed to. They were supposed to be lizard people, and somehow they turned into Africans. Not sure why. Maybe they didn't want to pay for the makeup effects.

It's probably one of the worst episodes of TNG. If not the absolute worst. Which is saying a lot, because season one was mostly dogshit in general.

 

[Captain Syrup]

He was grossly incompetent at pretty much everything he claimed to be an expert in... (Including cooking) and he literally got multiple people killed because they believed in his bullshit (Also his cooking almost destroyed the ship with cheese once). If he didn't want to be compared to Jar Jar then he shouldn't have been Jar Jar (yes I know he was technically pre- Jar Jar. My point still stands)

Dude, I’m telling you, somebody in that writers’ room was like, “What if Quark, but instead of being a lovable scumbag he’s a guy you'd love to kill with a hammer."



He's screaming “shE's my gIrLfrIEnd” at Tom Paris. Tom’s crime is just being a normal amount of handsome. Neelix is like, “How dare this Chad pilot exist.”

That’s gotta be Jeri Taylor, right? That feels like a Jeri Taylor pitch. (And of course Jonathan Frakes directed that episode.)