Tabletop game forumite achieves posting godhood, emerging from the void after 100,000 hour 11 year ban to continue the same argument from 2013 - SA forums beating autism records again

https://www.pcgamer.com/games/somet...-ban-to-continue-the-same-argument-from-2013/

In what may be a unique event in world history, a Something Awful forums user has posted so hard that it's become news—returning from the void after a decade-long ban purely in order to pick up the exact same tabletop game nerd debate that got him banned in the first place.

Let's begin at the beginning. The Something Awful forums are (in)famous and, god help us, genuinely culturally important. Despite—or maybe because of—a $10 registration fee, all sorts of memes, turns of phrase, and general ephemera of internet culture have sprung from them over the course of their 24-year existence. It also bears the burden of being at least partially responsible for the creation of 4chan, which was originally created by disgruntled members of SA's anime subforum.


The SA forums are also famous for giving moderators free reign when it comes to laying down the law. It's not uncommon for users to end up eating bans (which you have to pay $10 to get out of) or lengthy probations ("probes," or time-limited bans) because they're being annoying, or have neglected some bit of posting etiquette, or just because it'd be funny. The forums keep a dedicated list of all recent bans and probes alongside the reasons they were handed out, like a wall of heads on spikes.

One such head on one such spike was a poster in SA's tabletop game subforum. Etherwind, the hero of our tale, was disciplined all the way back in 2013 for, ah, jokingly wishing death upon an author on the World of Darkness TTRPGs in an argument over the political direction of the series. Etherwind's punishment was swift and lengthy: A probation period 100,000 hours long that began on the 14th of February, 2013, at 10:24 pm BST.


It's far from the only time a 100,000 hour probe has been handed down by SA's mods but, where most users simply take it as the de facto permaban it is, our Etherwind set an internal timer. 100,000 hours equals about 1.1 decades, 11.4 years, or 4167 days. He would be free to post again in July 2024.

Eleven years passed. And then…

Etherwind returned precisely 100,018 hours after his probation began and swiftly resumed the argument, posting at 9:04 BST on July 14, 2024, and quoting a post from the thread in which he was originally banned within SA's latest and greatest WoD discussion thread, ready to resume his war like some kind of net-bound Hiroo Onoda.


The thread's inhabitants, some of whom had only registered on SA long-after Etherwind had eaten his probation, were suitably awed by his tenacity and dedication. "I'm so curious," said poster Attorney at Funk, "does someone on an 11 year probation set a calendar reminder or does their poster's soul simply vibrate with newfound freedom[?]"

"Must feel amazing to let that out," said Relevant Tangent. "I don't think we're going to top that," said Rand Brittain, "so why don't we just go ahead and ban him for another eleven years?" Some compared it to events in the World of Darkness itself, like when an all-powerful Antediluvian vampire awakens from centuries of torpor to mete out godlike destruction. "Imagine having a Something Awful thread as your Fetter," said a user named Dawgstar.

But as frankly astounding as Etherwind's commitment to his bit was, his resurrection wasn't just a result of an untold dedication to posting. In a Google Doc shared with the thread via social media, our hero explained how posting in SA's community had been an important part of his life, how he had done a lot of growing up and a lot of mental healing in the intervening 100,000 hours, and how he now regretted his life as an infamously abrasive poster.

But still, even with his new outlook, he recognised the end of his ban could be an incredible opportunity for comedy. His decision? To set a calendar reminder and resume his argument like no time had passed at all, picking on a poster from back in the day that he had no beef with whatsoever, committing to the bit before dropping the account entirely.

Which is, frankly, quite heartwarming on top of being the greatest feat of posting I've ever witnessed. As strange as it might sound to say it, online communities like SA are an important aspect of a lot of people's lives. Lord knows I've gone through several over the course of my life that have actually shaped me as a person. Coming back 1.1 decades after a minor forum spat has ended to pick up the gauntlet again seems like a perfect way to reflect just how serious and ridiculous that is all at once.

Finally, Etherwind was right. Wraith's 20th Anniversary Edition didn't come out in 2016.

 

[Poop A Loop]

Goons are the gypsies of the internet.

Spoiler

It's interesting that Europeans can feel this way, and yet can't understand why Americans treat black asphalt culture which such incredible derision. Someone somewhere said nothing creates tolerance and understanding like exposure, and while true, I can tell you hatred is built up the exact same way.

I actually have a more poignant example though.

There were a good number of meetups I went to for game communities, pub crawls, etc. Just people coming together to hang out, drink, share stories, and have a good time as people. I found that conversation almost never strayed to the topic of the game that brought us together. If it was a game that goons had a presence in though, you always knew. If goons showed up, they were almost always autistically trying to bring up some inane drama from in game no one cared about, they never meshed with the other people there, and if there was more than one, they always huddled together.

In the fullness of time, communities in the country began talking about something referred to as "goon sweat," where you could typically pick out goons because they were always sweating like they were coming down from a high, they were always shifty and nervous, and they were always, always awkward. It became clear that at best most people would merely tolerate them, and at worst people would actually grow hostile to their attitude as nights wore on. Goons would never buy rounds of drinks, goons would never go in on food, goons would always complain that the beer garden wasn't as "authentic as that time their grandparents took them to Germany." Goons would typically wear ill fitting tshirts that had been washed too many times, or button up graphic shirts and shorts that were always size 46+ or higher. You might well accuse me of painting with a broad brush or making generalizations, but I'm not. Pre-troon, this was the goon culture and reality. If they cleaned up they could be presentable, but their entire motif revolved around an almost complete lack of self-care, from basic shaving to exercise to picking out clothes that could be assembled into something akin to a style.

You might find it insane, but they had a body type. They had a distinct culture. They had the same attitude. They had a kind of "aura" that you'd eventually learn to pick up on. Much like the European learned over time to detest the gypsie, so did these average people learn to hate the goon, even if they didn't know what a goon was, or what Something Awful was. Goons never enhanced any group or event, they could only drag it down. Over time you figured out they spent the entire time talking about the dumb games they played because they had no hobbies to share, no work experiences to relate to, no careers to complain about.

Goons are the gypsies of the internet. That's what it is.

 

[Snekposter]

Somewhere on the internet Arm Pit Cream is reading this and thinking "maybe there is still hope...."

Impossible. He's a Leaf. The only hope is his nation's healthcare system.

 

[BrainSand63]

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Here's his ban. I don't suppose anybody still has an account on there by any chance?

I’m heterosexual so I don’t have an account there