The best insults and comebacks you've ever heard

[Dwarf Lord]

Real life so not as grandiose as others:

10th grade, some nigger was tormenting a chubby Asian boy in class the entire school year while he sat there quietly, never defending himself. One day the black kid chimps out towards the teacher over some bullshit so she sends him out of the class. As he's walking towards the door the Asian kid speaks up and says "I guess Marcelo's family's welfare check didn't come in on time this month". Whole class laughed, black boy just stopped in place for a few seconds but never turned around, then kept walking toward the door and left. Never bothered the Asian boy again.

 

[Colon capital V]

"The only pussy you'll ever touch in your life is when you came out of your mother's."
"Oh wait nevermind, you got a c-section. LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

 

[the rat]

"your mom"

 

[OrionBalls]

Intelligent thoughts follow you, but you move too fast.

 

[Daddy's Angry Juice]

View attachment 6402259

I don't care if it's fake, this is still one of my favorite images ever.

 

[biggacracka]

Yo momma's pussy has taken so many creampies that when your daddy ate her out, he died of zinc poisoning.

Yo momma's so retarded, she yo momma

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

I'm very fond of, "You'd struggle to pour water out of a boot with the instructions written on the heel".

 

[Pignat]

A teacher was cheering on everyone finishing a run in gym class, when a kid named Arnold was at the finish line she called him Arnold Schwarzenegger, and another kid said "more like Arnold Shortnigger." I still think it's funny decades later.

 

[TenMilesWide]

helmet emoji with drooling smiling face evokes the image of a profound mental retard.

 

[TEA 3HF]

"He has all the charm of a case of the crabs, yet he manages to only be half the company."

 

[Vyse Inglebard]

If Kris Kross were here right now, they'd be calling you a "miggity-miggity-miggety-Mack Faggot".