The Cristal Dream.

[Some JERK]

The entirety of Chris's existence is seeking out the things that release dopamine--the chemical that gives him pleasure. Mindless trophies on PS3 games, soda pop, fast food, sparkle twilight princess ponies, feel-good chick flicks and positive dreams. Chris has effectively conditioned himself to believe that he should be happy, all the time, and then becomes quickly distressed when he isn't. (Also of note is that the body becomes resistant to dopamine after a while, meaning that it becomes harder and harder for Chris to feel pleasure from his limited surroundings.)

TL;DR version: Chris latched on to the Crystal Dream because it made him feel like a grown-up when he was a kid, and he latches on to it now because he remembers that it used to make him feel good.

This is one reason I'm glad Chris hasn't tried drugs. He seems like the kind of person who would get into a horrible addiction because it makes him feel good and helps him shut out the real world.

Given that he tried to haggle with a hooker, can you imagine Chris trying to score drugs? He'd most likely have to interact with a JERK, and they'd want to make sure he was "cool", which he isn't by any definition of the term. He'd probably try to haggle for a lower price since "the first time is always free" or any number of clichés that he's learned from television.

 

[DangDirtyTrolls]

grandiose ideas that bordered on delusional

Bordered on? He literally claimed Sonichu had a billion fans.

 

[DJAndyMD]

I completely forgot but, who was it who told Chris that she did not like the name Crystal and that God told her that her baby's name will not be Crystal and his response was "We'll talk about it when we get there"?

 

[Marvin]

I completely forgot but, who was it who told Chris that she did not like the name Crystal and that God told her that her baby's name will not be Crystal and his response was "We'll talk about it when we get there"?

CWCki's down right now, but Jackie or Kacey? I don't remember. One of them said that Crystal was a stripper name.

 

[The Dude]

I completely forgot but, who was it who told Chris that she did not like the name Crystal and that God told her that her baby's name will not be Crystal and his response was "We'll talk about it when we get there"?

CWCki's down right now, but Jackie or Kacey? I don't remember. One of them said that Crystal was a stripper name.

I think they both said something about not liking the name Crystal, but it seems like it was Kacey who said it sounded like a stripper's name. I could be wrong.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

It was Ivy that said it. It is in her FAQ. Basically she asked what if she didn't like the name Crystal. She told him it was a stripper name and since he could go to the strip club when he was STRESSED it would be inappropriate. His brain then proceeded to fart.

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

I think they both said something about not liking the name Crystal, but it seems like it was Kacey who said it sounded like a stripper's name. I could be wrong.

Neither Kacey nor Jackie liked it. Kacey's father said it sounded like a stripper name, I think Jackie tried to claim God promised her her daughter would be named something totally different or something. In both cases, Chris basically just said "thoughts inputed, but really she'll be named Crystal", since he thinks he's the only one God speaks to and the rest of us just need to get out of the way of his wishes.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

In the father call Matt said Crystal sounded too much like a stripper's name.

 

[NobleGreyHorse]

In the father call Matt said Crystal sounded too much like a stripper's name.

This, and there ensued a pointless argument about whether you can spell "Crystal" in a way that isn't stripperiffic.

 

[The Dude]

In the father call Matt said Crystal sounded too much like a stripper's name.

This, and there ensued a pointless argument about whether you can spell "Crystal" in a way that isn't stripperiffic.

Pro-tip: You can't. Just like naming a girl Porsche, Candy, or Mercedes.

 

[CatParty]

In the father call Matt said Crystal sounded too much like a stripper's name.

This, and there ensued a pointless argument about whether you can spell "Crystal" in a way that isn't stripperiffic.

Pro-tip: You can't. Just like naming a girl Porsche, Candy, or Mercedes.

"let's meet the board of directors: porsche, candy, mercedes and your new ceo crystal"

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Pro-tip: You can't. Just like naming a girl Porsche, Candy, or Mercedes.

I think "sassy black woman" when I hear Mercedes.

 

[The Dude]

Pro-tip: You can't. Just like naming a girl Porsche, Candy, or Mercedes.

I think "sassy black woman" when I hear Mercedes.

I think "well built German automobiles" when I hear Mercedes. I'd love to find a stripper named Volkswagen.

 

[BillRiley]

Unless they were koolaid drinking crazies, I doubt the church told Chris too explicitly that the dream was from god.

I'm sure the church had nothing to do with it. Chris dreams of something he likes, then wakes up and decides God directly endorses it because that way it's validated. He can't comprehend that something he wants isn't automatically owed to him by the powers-that-be of the universe.

I wouldn't rule out Chris' church quite so quickly. Not his current Methodist one, mind you. I'm talking about the Korean Baptist church he got the boot from. Southern Baptists in general can believe some crazy things and the Korean version just turns the crazy knob up to 11. (Remember the Korean church that moved to Garland, TX around the turn of the century because the town's name sounded like "Godland" and that's where they thought the rapture would occur? Yeah, that kind of crazy.)

Hell, "prophetic dreaming" isn't all that uncommon in US churches, though it tends more towards the Pentacostal than other denominations. For awhile there back in the '90s, you could turn on TBN and be hard pressed to find a televangelist that didn't have prophetic dreams. (Usually of the "send me money" kind.) Unfortunately, there's just not a lot of information on how Chris came to think his dreams were sent from The Divine.

 

[Satoru182]

Actually what I meant to say is that the casual mention of the dream caused some old folk to say something along the lines of god given dreams. Not that the entire church endorsed such thing.

Chris liked the idea of being God's ham radio because it say something good to his future.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

Chris has the need to feel special, so of course he thinks God gives him special messages in his sleep.

At least he hasn't started the Church of Chris or something to go with his visions

 

[The Dude]

Chris has the need to feel special, so of course he thinks God gives him special messages in his sleep.

At least he hasn't started the Church of Chris or something to go with his visions

Hmmm...yeah. Yo-you shall have no ud-hmm...no other Christians before me. And on da third day Sonichu did Zap to da Extreme for our sins!

 

[Da Pickle Monsta]

Chris has the need to feel special, so of course he thinks God gives him special messages in his sleep.

At least he hasn't started the Church of Chris or something to go with his visions

Hmmm...yeah. Yo-you shall have no ud-hmm...no other Christians before me. And on da third day Sonichu did Zap to da Extreme for our sins!

MMM . . . yeah . . . list of Christ-Chan holidays:

February 14th--Sex Day
February 21st--Pancake Day
February 24th--Christian Love Day
June 27th--Patti Memorial Day
July 4th--Take-your-blow-up-sweetheart-to-the-drive-thru-and-make-out Day
August 28th--PS3 Ascension
September 4th--PS3 Resurrection.
September 6th--Bob's Ascension.
October 28th--Black October. The day Chris went to jail for the sins of the wicked Jews.
November 26th (on or about)--Black Friday, AKA Vidya Day
December 25th--LEGO Day

 

[Ha-Taque]

Chris has the need to feel special, so of course he thinks God gives him special messages in his sleep.

At least he hasn't started the Church of Chris or something to go with his visions

Hmmm...yeah. Yo-you shall have no ud-hmm...no other Christians before me. And on da third day Sonichu did Zap to da Extreme for our sins!

MMM . . . yeah . . . list of Christ-Chan holidays:

February 14th--Sex Day
February 21st--Pancake Day
February 24th--Christian Love Day
June 27th--Patti Memorial Day
July 4th--Take-your-blow-up-sweetheart-to-the-drive-thru-and-make-out Day
August 28th--PS3 Ascension
September 4th--PS3 Resurrection.
September 6th--Bob's Ascension.
October 28th--Black October. The day Chris went to jail for the sins of the wicked Jews.
November 26th (on or about)--Black Friday, AKA Vidya Day
December 25th--LEGO Day

In Spain we celebrate "la semana santa" (The holy week) If we had to worship Chris we'll have to celebrate the holy century

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

I think "well built German automobiles" when I hear Mercedes. I'd love to find a stripper named Volkswagen.

I met a stripper named Saab once. Best lapdance I ever got, but boy did she cry a lot.

Chris has the need to feel special, so of course he thinks God gives him special messages in his sleep.

It's the exact same phenomenon every little kid ever goes through. The kid grows up hearing stories about God, and prophecies, and magic powers, and superheroes, and whatever else media throws at them; they just automatically assume "well of course I'M special, so I must be destined to be a great hero/prophet/whatever!" Then they'll interpret anything at all as a sign God is speaking to only them or they have a unique destiny. It's not until they start maturing that they begin to piece together that no, they aren't automatically the next coming, if they want to be special they have to do something with their lives to earn it.

Chris never went through that. He has spent 31 years believing that he is more special than everyone else. He couldn't even put it into words if you asked - it's such a natural assumption to him, he's never even given it thought.