The CWC Rhyming Game

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Chris, Chris,
Smells like piss,
Bitches when things go amiss.
Buys his legos day and night,
Whines if one should catch alight.
Blaming trolls his facebook fills,
Your monthly tugboat pays his bills.
Eventually, soon comes his fall,
His possessions: he'll have none at all.
Together with his hoarding mum,
On the street or on the run,
He'll live his life of misery,
To the joy of you and me.
Greedy and selfish,
He lives in the now,
He'll always be Our Pet Lolcow.
 
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you do not have a say
you have only been here since may
CatParty has spoken, and he has a say.
So I'm guessing this thread is here to stay.

In a verdant, eastern state called Virginia
There once lived a couple named Bob and Barbara
Who spawned a boy named Christopher in '82
But the boy couldn't speak, oh what to do?!
One day Barb took the little boy shopping,
He saw a toy and started madly hopping.
His lips began moving, could this be it?
 
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I was inspired to write this as a rap song in the spirit of last night's Deagle Nation Live Stream.

ChrisChan's a big man
He had big plans to be an artist.
Instead he ended up a cake fartist.
The women he gets are better than what you lay.
A Blow-up doll and Cherokee pimp yelling JULAY!
Sonichu in his main crew driving down the avenue
Going to the Game Place to put Snyder in his place.
That jew's real mean, but nothing can stop Chris
When he sends out Sonichu to zap to the extreme.
Later that night it's back to the hideout to pound some reeb
or maybe grab a glass of long island iced tea.
But later soon it's time to dash,
'cause he's gotta go out soon to catch and strangle Clyde Cash.

ChrisChan. He's an artist.
ChrisChan. He's an autist.

He goes out to the mall. Says he wants some women. No malarkey;
Read the sign dummy: NO DARKIES.
People hate on Chris's game. Walsh and Jerkops all the same.
Smashing down his heart level, to drive him insane.
Trolls and haters on his trail trying to make his quest fail.
They'll never catch Chris alive and throw him in jail.
But one day it came true: Chris tried to flatten Michael Snyder
with his car, like a bug on the bottom of his shoe.
Then he got caught by the police chief. Scared him so bad that it
made his tidy whitties turn to DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS.

ChrisChan. He's an artist.
ChrisChan. He's an autist.
 
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Chris, Chris,
Smells like piss,
Bitches when things go amiss.
Buys his legos day and night,
Whines if one should catch alight.
Blaming trolls his facebook fills,
Your monthly tugboat pays his bills.
Eventually, soon comes his fall,
His possessions: he'll have none at all.
Together with his hoarding mum,
On the street or on the run,
He'll live his life of misery,
To the joy of you and me.
Greedy and selfish,
He lives in the now,
He'll always be Our Pet Lolcow.
An excellent poem indeed
And one that could also lead
to a rowdy drinking song

(non rhyming explanation: I'm tired, mine sucked. Basically, your rhyming could make a great drinking song. good job)
 
Original Character Do Not Steal
Simonla Rosechu is mine for real
I do not like her getting killed
I didn't like the grave being filled
Evan killed mommy you understand
Take your drill to the dick like a man
But when I redraw this, well you'll see
The coloring's gone, too much work for me
But if you thought Simonla was gone
I'll bring her back, my plan all along.
 
Small, mangled and bent,
It always aims downward.
He cannot pay his rent.
To @Tubular Monkey , he is abhorred.

Confused_dog.jpg
 
To the extreme Sonichu must dash.

Otherwise, shit won't be so cash.

Pickles are things Chris doesn't suck.

As they remind him of his bent duck.

The trolls and denizens of the CWCki give him griefs.

As evidenced by his DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS.

His virgin with rage status was given the boot.

For he had sex with a prostitute.

The Pickle Man had tricked him again.

And now he crashes into slumber within his den.
 
Now this is a story all about how
Cwc's life got flipped-turned upside down
Now let me take a minute, please sit quite still
I'll tell you how he became the tard of the town, Ruckersville.

In northern Virginia, he was born and raised
In his bedroom is where he spent most of his days
Playing with Lego, being uncool
Sitting with his vidya, sleeping through school

Then one day he just had to make a scene
So the school staff pinned him down and recorded his screams
This happened once, his mom claimed they were cruel
She said "you're moving with you father while we sue the school"
 
There was a fat little boy with a small little brain
His stool was profound but thoughts were insane
His parents were dummies who hollered and bleated
'Cause both of their gene pools were mostly depleted
 
Bam, zoom
All tobacky to the moon
Long Island Ice Tea goes down salty
Chris's logic is faulty

Stop the violence from the police
Chris used to say that, but his dad is deceased
He got caught in a stress, put on a dress
When the jerkops from Virginia said he got into a mess
Seek knowledge was never Chris's main game
To figure out the the life, to figure out the blame
Just when Chris got thoughts mapped
A ween behind him said "Your briefs got crapped"

Is that the old GTA theme (Joyride) I'm detecting as inspiration?
 
Bob set the house on fire by Simoniachu

Ever since Bob kicked the bucket.
The chandler family seemed to go "fuck it"
To anyone and anything
At least that's how it seems..
Bob watched above in frustration
At the sight of his sons doll masturbation
Poor Mike Synder was a victim
the chandlers in the son-chu hit him.
bobs baby boy was now a girl
The thought of it made him hurl
Branchland ct was a pig stye
It brought a tear to bobs eye
He thought he should end what he started
The unhappy marriage with barn and the son who was retarded.
All it'd take was a broken machine
That would release the fire from within
The flames burned big and bright
Would the chandlers die? They might..
Bob waited and waited
Waited for his family to join him, dead.
Too bad the only dead he was met with.
Were his sons multiple Lego kits.
 
"Yep I'm on tv"
The proud manchild said
With his home made dvd
And big dreams in his head;
A creation so unique
To be shipped out en masse
His fame at its pique
While he sits on his ass.

Then the trolls came along
With their gosh darned ED
His revenge went so wrong
And thus Megan did flee
But he wasn't to blame
Not this glorious mayor
Called an army in his name
Spreading hate with no care.

Down, down he did spiral
Falling for every trick
Twolls made his life viral
Some amused, some where sick
He fought on their grounds
For he had all to gain
Like sweet china to pound
And no muck on his name.

Years passed, he fell silent
All thought he was done
No trolls to make him violent
Entertainment value? None.
Yet like a phoenix from ashes
He has risen again
With ebay scandals, gooch piercings
S/He is even more insane.

So we watch from our forum
As the exploits go on
A decline in decorum
And it keeps going more wrong.
I wonder if hes pondered
In his world of uncertainty
What would have happened if he'd never
Said "Yep, I'm on tv."
 
"Yep I'm on tv"
The proud manchild said
With his home made dvd
And big dreams in his head;
A creation so unique
To be shipped out en masse
His fame at its pique
While he sits on his ass.

Then the trolls came along
With their gosh darned ED
His revenge went so wrong
And thus Megan did flee
But he wasn't to blame
Not this glorious mayor
Called an army in his name
Spreading hate with no care.

Down, down he did spiral
Falling for every trick
Twolls made his life viral
Some amused, some where sick
He fought on their grounds
For he had all to gain
Like sweet china to pound
And no muck on his name.

Years passed, he fell silent
All thought he was done
No trolls to make him violent
Entertainment value? None.
Yet like a phoenix from ashes
He has risen again
With ebay scandals, gooch piercings
S/He is even more insane.

So we watch from our forum
As the exploits go on
A decline in decorum
And it keeps going more wrong.
I wonder if hes pondered
In his world of uncertainty
What would have happened if he'd never
Said "Yep, I'm on tv."
This is glorious.
 
Deep in the Ruckersville thicket
lies home for the cat and the cricket,
where both Robert and Barbara
decided to harbor a
beastly, unpriestly meal ticket.
 
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