The Second Annual CWCki Forums Secret Santa *CLOSED*

I got mine, in the form of a Creepypasta. Thanks for that! I love Creepypastas!
 
Got mine just a few minutes ago. Very classy- thanks!
 
I have a few I need to send out, but have not had computer access all day. Never fear it will be out tonight.
 
emily_h_the_viking_princess_by_rhubarbleaves12864-d6z05pi.png
'

Thanks Dark Mirror Hole! Remember, everyone is free and encouraged to show off here what they got. Also, if you have not received a gift yet, please let me know.
 
Secret Santa said:
I could tell you I’d seen a worse-looking slum, but I’d be lying. Refer addicts and H dealers frequented better establishments. Didn’t matter, though. I was here for the job, not to soak up the ambiance. Some dame was missing, and this was her last known whereabouts. Hell, anyone that came here was probably better off staying missing.

Couldn’t tell if there had been a struggle or not, the place was such a mess it could have gone either way. I kept tripping over old shirts and porno mags. I was losing my motivation to even navigate this dump. Fortunately, a couple extra sips of liquid “motivation” and I was able to remember my bills… especially Bill, my parole officer and Bill, my bookie.

No telling how long this dame had been missing. No telling who was looking for her, either. My secretary just handed me the job… an envelope, listing the victim, this address, and the name “Julie”, with a couple wadded up twenties. My secretary then gave me her two weeks notice, which was accompanied by a rather unladylike gesture and a reminder that she’d actually given me her two weeks notice three weeks ago and I didn’t say anything.

It was then I noticed the stiff. The body was cradled into a corner and covered with a soiled blanket. Decomposition had already set it… it was oozing and rancid. Whatever sick fuck did this, he took his time, he had fun. The dame wasn’t much of a looker in the first place, but her hair was matted and the skin looked like someone had taken a tire iron to her. Well, she was in a better place now. Shit, hell would be an upgrade from this place. Or even New Jersey.

Just then, the dame’s mouth opened. She was alive! Somehow she’d survived all this! I had no idea how any creature could survive whatever she’d been through. I leaned down and tried to steady her.

“Easy, there, hon… save your strength. Tell me, who did this to you?”

Her eyes went glassy and looked off to nowhere. “Dis is aw da fawlt of… dat Clyde Cash!”
Click to expand...

I laughed so hard at the end, it was perfect :lol:
 
It was the first Christmas since the incident happened, since the day that the furries revolted. We did not notice at first, but then they came in numbers, swarming the capital, we were only just able to fend them off. Sine then they have been a roving horde, yiffing everything in site. This time, they had taken it too far. This time they were trying to steal Christmas.

My name is Shoop, and I am a soldier with the 101st LOLBourne, elite troops trained to wipe up those furry bastards. It was a cold night when I got the call. The Commander told me the news, they had lost all contact with Santas workshop, and there would be hell to pay. My men were not much, there was Corporal Jace Stryker, with his bright red lipstick and technicolor 'fro, Tyce his butt body, in a tactical camisole dress. Along with them was Private Nick Bate, a new kid who showed a lot of potential. Oh, and there was this weird ass gnome we found. He was pretty cool. Our unit was dropped off 12 klicks south of Santas workshop, and even here the carnage was gruesome. The violated corpses of reindeer and elves were everywhere, some still being yiffed into oblivion. It took all of my training not to puke. “Oh god, why did you bring me here? I'm not even a soldier?” cried out the gnome, I liked the gnome, I think I shall call him Billy. “It's ok billy you will be fine” I said to the lad. “What? Billy? Who the fuck is Billy?” The gnome squealed with childlike glee, clearly happy with his new name. But the tender moment was not to last, shots rang out. Screaming came from the rear. Private Bate had been shot in the ass. “Oooh nuuuu!!!” he screamed. I pulled out my M4 and fired at the wave of fur and semen that was flowing our way. “Fuck! Fall back” I yelled in a tone that is being described in an unnecessary verbose manner. That had us pinned back, but I knew what I had to do. I picked up the gnome and chucked his little ass into the fray. “FUUUUUUUCCCKK YOOOOOOOUU!!!” He screamed as he went sailing into the mass of fur and the broken dreams of parents. The brave little gnomes sacrifice would give us the time to sneak past them. “I'm gonna miss you Billy!” I said. “MY NAME IS LEINAD!” he gurgled. God bless Billy.

I would not let the gnomes sacrifice be in vain, I pushed through enemy lines, Jace opening fire with his elite sniper skills, unfortunately, we lost Pvt Bate in a fight over an elfs corpse. Myself, Stryker and Tyce made it to the workshop, and what we saw inside was horrifying. Santa was tyed to a pole, with furries everywhere, dancing around him, as some sort of bizarre religious rite. I was not having this, I charged in to attack, gunning down one furfag after another. I was ab out to untie Santa, when I heard Ryce yell out. “Not so fast.” I turned around and there was Tyce, in a fursuit. “You bastard....” I muttered . He had already put a bullet through Jaces head. I had to think fast, so I quickly grabbed a tail and shoved it down Tyces throat. He said something as he died, sounded something like “Hurglegurglehmmmmmpfff!” Deep stuff. Finally I was able to free Santa. “Thank you for saving me, now allow me to give you your gift!” Santa reached into his big ol' sack and handed me a giant bowl of sauerkraut. Just what I wanted. Finslly Santa turned to me and said,

“Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas Shoopdawoop!”
Click to expand...

This was mine c: I love it. Such a manly story. Just for the record.. I'm a girl :lol:
 
shoopdawoop6 said:
It was the first Christmas since the incident happened, since the day that the furries revolted. We did not notice at first, but then they came in numbers, swarming the capital, we were only just able to fend them off. Sine then they have been a roving horde, yiffing everything in site. This time, they had taken it too far. This time they were trying to steal Christmas.

My name is Shoop, and I am a soldier with the 101st LOLBourne, elite troops trained to wipe up those furry bastards. It was a cold night when I got the call. The Commander told me the news, they had lost all contact with Santas workshop, and there would be hell to pay. My men were not much, there was Corporal Jace Stryker, with his bright red lipstick and technicolor 'fro, Tyce his butt body, in a tactical camisole dress. Along with them was Private Nick Bate, a new kid who showed a lot of potential. Oh, and there was this weird ass gnome we found. He was pretty cool. Our unit was dropped off 12 klicks south of Santas workshop, and even here the carnage was gruesome. The violated corpses of reindeer and elves were everywhere, some still being yiffed into oblivion. It took all of my training not to puke. “Oh god, why did you bring me here? I'm not even a soldier?” cried out the gnome, I liked the gnome, I think I shall call him Billy. “It's ok billy you will be fine” I said to the lad. “What? Billy? Who the fuck is Billy?” The gnome squealed with childlike glee, clearly happy with his new name. But the tender moment was not to last, shots rang out. Screaming came from the rear. Private Bate had been shot in the ass. “Oooh nuuuu!!!” he screamed. I pulled out my M4 and fired at the wave of fur and semen that was flowing our way. “Fuck! Fall back” I yelled in a tone that is being described in an unnecessary verbose manner. That had us pinned back, but I knew what I had to do. I picked up the gnome and chucked his little ass into the fray. “FUUUUUUUCCCKK YOOOOOOOUU!!!” He screamed as he went sailing into the mass of fur and the broken dreams of parents. The brave little gnomes sacrifice would give us the time to sneak past them. “I'm gonna miss you Billy!” I said. “MY NAME IS LEINAD!” he gurgled. God bless Billy.

I would not let the gnomes sacrifice be in vain, I pushed through enemy lines, Jace opening fire with his elite sniper skills, unfortunately, we lost Pvt Bate in a fight over an elfs corpse. Myself, Stryker and Tyce made it to the workshop, and what we saw inside was horrifying. Santa was tyed to a pole, with furries everywhere, dancing around him, as some sort of bizarre religious rite. I was not having this, I charged in to attack, gunning down one furfag after another. I was ab out to untie Santa, when I heard Ryce yell out. “Not so fast.” I turned around and there was Tyce, in a fursuit. “You bastard....” I muttered . He had already put a bullet through Jaces head. I had to think fast, so I quickly grabbed a tail and shoved it down Tyces throat. He said something as he died, sounded something like “Hurglegurglehmmmmmpfff!” Deep stuff. Finally I was able to free Santa. “Thank you for saving me, now allow me to give you your gift!” Santa reached into his big ol' sack and handed me a giant bowl of sauerkraut. Just what I wanted. Finslly Santa turned to me and said,

“Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas Shoopdawoop!”
Click to expand...

This was mine c: I love it. Such a manly story. Just for the record.. I'm a girl :lol:
Click to expand...


GODDAMN IT I DID IT AGAIN. :oops:
 
This image is from the super awesome _blank_! And it is SO FRICKING KICKASS!

ScrtSnt-2013b_zpsf844fc6e.jpg

Thanks, man! This is so awesome. Merry CWCmas to you, and to all of the CWCki!

And by the way, Himawari, I am your Secret Admirer. I hope you like your gift! Be free to share it with anyone!
 
Surtur said:
shoopdawoop6 said:
It was the first Christmas since the incident happened, since the day that the furries revolted. We did not notice at first, but then they came in numbers, swarming the capital, we were only just able to fend them off. Sine then they have been a roving horde, yiffing everything in site. This time, they had taken it too far. This time they were trying to steal Christmas.

My name is Shoop, and I am a soldier with the 101st LOLBourne, elite troops trained to wipe up those furry bastards. It was a cold night when I got the call. The Commander told me the news, they had lost all contact with Santas workshop, and there would be hell to pay. My men were not much, there was Corporal Jace Stryker, with his bright red lipstick and technicolor 'fro, Tyce his butt body, in a tactical camisole dress. Along with them was Private Nick Bate, a new kid who showed a lot of potential. Oh, and there was this weird ass gnome we found. He was pretty cool. Our unit was dropped off 12 klicks south of Santas workshop, and even here the carnage was gruesome. The violated corpses of reindeer and elves were everywhere, some still being yiffed into oblivion. It took all of my training not to puke. “Oh god, why did you bring me here? I'm not even a soldier?” cried out the gnome, I liked the gnome, I think I shall call him Billy. “It's ok billy you will be fine” I said to the lad. “What? Billy? Who the fuck is Billy?” The gnome squealed with childlike glee, clearly happy with his new name. But the tender moment was not to last, shots rang out. Screaming came from the rear. Private Bate had been shot in the ass. “Oooh nuuuu!!!” he screamed. I pulled out my M4 and fired at the wave of fur and semen that was flowing our way. “Fuck! Fall back” I yelled in a tone that is being described in an unnecessary verbose manner. That had us pinned back, but I knew what I had to do. I picked up the gnome and chucked his little ass into the fray. “FUUUUUUUCCCKK YOOOOOOOUU!!!” He screamed as he went sailing into the mass of fur and the broken dreams of parents. The brave little gnomes sacrifice would give us the time to sneak past them. “I'm gonna miss you Billy!” I said. “MY NAME IS LEINAD!” he gurgled. God bless Billy.

I would not let the gnomes sacrifice be in vain, I pushed through enemy lines, Jace opening fire with his elite sniper skills, unfortunately, we lost Pvt Bate in a fight over an elfs corpse. Myself, Stryker and Tyce made it to the workshop, and what we saw inside was horrifying. Santa was tyed to a pole, with furries everywhere, dancing around him, as some sort of bizarre religious rite. I was not having this, I charged in to attack, gunning down one furfag after another. I was ab out to untie Santa, when I heard Ryce yell out. “Not so fast.” I turned around and there was Tyce, in a fursuit. “You bastard....” I muttered . He had already put a bullet through Jaces head. I had to think fast, so I quickly grabbed a tail and shoved it down Tyces throat. He said something as he died, sounded something like “Hurglegurglehmmmmmpfff!” Deep stuff. Finally I was able to free Santa. “Thank you for saving me, now allow me to give you your gift!” Santa reached into his big ol' sack and handed me a giant bowl of sauerkraut. Just what I wanted. Finslly Santa turned to me and said,

“Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas Shoopdawoop!”
Click to expand...

This was mine c: I love it. Such a manly story. Just for the record.. I'm a girl :lol:
Click to expand...


GODDAMN IT I DID IT AGAIN. :oops:
Click to expand...
TWO YEARS IN A ROW, WOW
 
Surtur said:
shoopdawoop6 said:
It was the first Christmas since the incident happened, since the day that the furries revolted. We did not notice at first, but then they came in numbers, swarming the capital, we were only just able to fend them off. Sine then they have been a roving horde, yiffing everything in site. This time, they had taken it too far. This time they were trying to steal Christmas.

My name is Shoop, and I am a soldier with the 101st LOLBourne, elite troops trained to wipe up those furry bastards. It was a cold night when I got the call. The Commander told me the news, they had lost all contact with Santas workshop, and there would be hell to pay. My men were not much, there was Corporal Jace Stryker, with his bright red lipstick and technicolor 'fro, Tyce his butt body, in a tactical camisole dress. Along with them was Private Nick Bate, a new kid who showed a lot of potential. Oh, and there was this weird ass gnome we found. He was pretty cool. Our unit was dropped off 12 klicks south of Santas workshop, and even here the carnage was gruesome. The violated corpses of reindeer and elves were everywhere, some still being yiffed into oblivion. It took all of my training not to puke. “Oh god, why did you bring me here? I'm not even a soldier?” cried out the gnome, I liked the gnome, I think I shall call him Billy. “It's ok billy you will be fine” I said to the lad. “What? Billy? Who the fuck is Billy?” The gnome squealed with childlike glee, clearly happy with his new name. But the tender moment was not to last, shots rang out. Screaming came from the rear. Private Bate had been shot in the ass. “Oooh nuuuu!!!” he screamed. I pulled out my M4 and fired at the wave of fur and semen that was flowing our way. “Fuck! Fall back” I yelled in a tone that is being described in an unnecessary verbose manner. That had us pinned back, but I knew what I had to do. I picked up the gnome and chucked his little ass into the fray. “FUUUUUUUCCCKK YOOOOOOOUU!!!” He screamed as he went sailing into the mass of fur and the broken dreams of parents. The brave little gnomes sacrifice would give us the time to sneak past them. “I'm gonna miss you Billy!” I said. “MY NAME IS LEINAD!” he gurgled. God bless Billy.

I would not let the gnomes sacrifice be in vain, I pushed through enemy lines, Jace opening fire with his elite sniper skills, unfortunately, we lost Pvt Bate in a fight over an elfs corpse. Myself, Stryker and Tyce made it to the workshop, and what we saw inside was horrifying. Santa was tyed to a pole, with furries everywhere, dancing around him, as some sort of bizarre religious rite. I was not having this, I charged in to attack, gunning down one furfag after another. I was ab out to untie Santa, when I heard Ryce yell out. “Not so fast.” I turned around and there was Tyce, in a fursuit. “You bastard....” I muttered . He had already put a bullet through Jaces head. I had to think fast, so I quickly grabbed a tail and shoved it down Tyces throat. He said something as he died, sounded something like “Hurglegurglehmmmmmpfff!” Deep stuff. Finally I was able to free Santa. “Thank you for saving me, now allow me to give you your gift!” Santa reached into his big ol' sack and handed me a giant bowl of sauerkraut. Just what I wanted. Finslly Santa turned to me and said,

“Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas Shoopdawoop!”
Click to expand...

This was mine c: I love it. Such a manly story. Just for the record.. I'm a girl :lol:
Click to expand...


GODDAMN IT I DID IT AGAIN. :oops:
Click to expand...

I'm an EDitor on Encyclopedia Dramatica and I don't think they know I'm a girl still. And it's been over a year.
 
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