The Unofficial Kiwi Poorfag Resource Thread - share recipes and resources for your area (both government and personal) here

Thats true sewing machines can be bought very cheap used if thats your thing. Personally I hand sew as once u get good at it still takes longer but not that much longer and u can't carry a machine in your bag.

100% agree on quesadillas. Any tortilla based food tbh. Another good thing to add to cooking is worshtershire sauce. add somemof that and some peanut butter to chicken and its close enough to satay.
Warmed tortillas with honey and butter used to be my jam as a kid.
 
Or instead of dying.
  • Cold water on pulse points
  • Ice packs/Techni ice on stomach or between thighs
  • Fans fans a million times fans. Get a fan. I don't care if you get it from the dollar store and it breaks after two weeks, you need it for those two weeks.
For the fan, get a box fan, one of the thin square industrial looking ones, open all your windows, and blow the fan out of the hottest window. The negative pressure will suck air into every other window. In the summer, you should be ventilating your house as aggressively as possible during the evenings and early mornings, and shutting up tight during the hottest parts of the day. If you can make it cold enough to shiver at night, bundle up and do it, that cold means it will take longer to heat up again during the day.

On the flipside, during winter, use a hot water bottle in your bed before you get in. Cowboys used to do this with stones from the fire, so that the blanket wouldn't suck the heat from their bodies, and you can do the same. If you're in an apartment, try just turning the heating completely off. Mooching off of your neighbors really does work, though it's unpleasant.
 
a cheap basic rice cooker is worth it. Just hit a button and wait 20 minutes and you have perfect rice.
NoReturn's recipe for perfect cheapass rice-cooker-rice
You will need:
  • Rice
  • Salt
  • Fat
  • Water
  • Cositas (optional: Dried hijiki, MSG, dried herbs, the crumbly bits left over from dried mushrooms... shit like that)
You will do:
  1. Measure rice and pour into rice cooker bowl
  2. Pour a shitton of water on the rice and stir it about until it's nice and cloudy
    • Pour ricewater out into a container to use on plants and/or hair, not just down the drain
  3. Repeat step 2 about 2-5 times until water stops being cloudy
  4. Add a bit of water to rice so you can shake it flat, poke the top of the rice with your index finger
  5. Add water until the water level reaches your first knuckle
  6. Put into ricecooker
  7. Add 1tb/cup-of-rice of whatever fat you want or matches the meal
  8. Add a pinch of salt and a sprinkle of whatever else you want if appropriate
  9. Push button and wait 20 minutes
Now you have rice
 
Last edited:
Insulate your home as best you can, my parents used to stuff rags in the gaps in the windows. Or if you can sew or knit, make a draught excluder out of scrap fabric or yarn (you can reuse yarn by unravelling old knitted items). Here's a knitting pattern for one, called Doug the caterpillar. They've not really demonstrated how to use it properly here, you put them up against the door when it's closed to keep out draughts underneath it.
He's the mascot of Home Energy Scotland which has a load of advice on saving fuel in general, and if you're in Scotland it tells you about financial support.
 
Scrape up the money and invest in some ceramic kitchen knives. They don't even have to be good ones. A cheap ceramic knife will keep its edge for years, contrasting with a cheap metal knife that will be blunt in a couple of weeks. They are a good investment for around $30, depending on size. Alternatively you can buy a steel and learn how to sharpen metal knives yourself and save money that way. Just be aware that a cheap metal knife will wear away quickly and may have burrs on the blade as artifacts of sharpening.

A cheap knife will not necessarily save you money. If a knife is blunt, you're much more likely to do yourself serious harm with it.

Caveat: Ceramic knives do require some extra care and aren't as sturdy as steel knives. They can chip or break if you drop them, you can't use them to chop ice or bone, and you can only use them on a wooden or plastic cutting board. That said they are surprisingly sturdy. I have three that I've had for nearly twelve years, and I've only broken the very tip off one of them. They cost me $20 to $40 each at the time I bought them. They are still quite sharp despite never being sharpened. I have a steel knife that I pull out whenever I need to hack up a bone, but 98% of the time, ceramic works beautifully.
 
Last edited:
If you have an android, YouTube Vanced effectively makes premium features free so you don't have to watch brain damaging advertisements and it nullifies paying Spotify premium. There are also adblocker APKs for Spotify if you dive down that rabbit hole.

Say you live in a rural area without good ISPs but relatively good cell tower coverage, upgrade your plan to truly unlimited data without a GB restriction and use PairVPN when running the hotspot. Only drawback is you have to actually be at home for it to work for security or smart devices and it's not as fast as good city internet. I clock in at about 50 Mbps usually.

If you can't get a Ring security system, get a cellular trail camera. Most offer 100 free photos a month. When you're leaving the house to go out and about, leave it in a good spot. In case someone visits or breaks in, you'll know and even if they get to it, the photo should transmit fast enough to the cloud to catch them as evidence. Just make sure you put it where pets do not traffic or things blow in the wind excessively.

If you suffer from insomnia and use Zzzquil, just use regular benadryl pills you can buy in bulk for cheaper.

Trash sucks, if you don't produce a lot of trash or have access to a dumpster then fly tip in a family member or friend's garbage bin with their permission.

If video games are a joy to you but you don't want to spend big bucks on post-gamergate corperate crap, consider downloading and configuring an emulator on your PC or phone.

Stop buying bottled water, get a brita filter pitcher and buy off-brand replacement filters. Get a sturdy water jug you can clean easily.
 
Rice and beans.

Anyway, moving on from the polissa reference...


This one is a bit of effort but my sociology professor gave us broke students this tip and a lot of us used it for the rest of university.

We all know that if you bitch to companies, they sometimes give free shit. That's the route most "I'm poor, look at me" people go.

What works even better...is if you compliment the company.

Email used to be best but I haven't done this jn years so maybe twitter/fb works now, but send an email about a product you like or want to try.

Just a quick little "oh I loved this product so much, I've made friends and family buy it and my whole family worships it nightly" or "I've seen commercials and think x is a great idea. I can't seem to find it locally, can you direct me towards where you sell?"

9/10 times they'll send you either some coupons, a free item or a gift card. Major companies have a whole underused department that deals with this and they love getting a compliment rather than some illiterate screeching about how someone didn't like something and now the world's ending.
 
I don't wash rice. I buy enriched rice and you're just rinsing all those added vitamins and whatever down the drain. Unless you're harvesting rice directly from a field and worry about weevils there is no reason to rinse rice. You don't need a "rice cooker" you need a pot with a lid. 2x water to 1x rice is the ratio, you cook it for 20 minutes with a lid on it slightly askew to let steam out and you have perfectly cooked rice. Put a pat of butter in it so it doesn't stick to the sides too much.

You can eat like a king if you learn how to cook, them's the rules. The worst part about being poor is not having the energy to cook when you've been working like a rented mule all day and you just don't want to put the effort in.

Tortillas and eggs and rice and beans and god help me ravioli in a can and plain old ham and american cheese or grilled cheese sandwiches are literally pennies a serving. Get some pork chops when they're on sale they are easy to cook, put some mustard on it and some canned green beans or spinach on the side and that's a good meal. Spaghetti and jar sauce may not be gourmet but it's a good meal. Buy a head of lettuce and just eat it like a fucking onion or be civilized and chop it up and make a vinaigrette out of exactly two cents worth of oil and mustard

Goddamnit, I'm hungry now. I didn't even get to talking about how delicious and easy cornbread is.
 
If you are an Australian from Banana Bender country, and you have a concession card, you are eligible for two free pairs of prescription spectacles every two years. They only come in a single phase, simple lens and of course, the variety of frames to chose from is extremely limited. However, you can get each pair of spectacles in a different prescription so there's your distance glasses and your reading glasses.

Just be aware that you may have to travel to find a participating optometrist if you're at the back of Woop Woop, but if you're near a fairly large town you should be fine.
 
Last edited:
Before you put your clothing in a washing machine, zip your zippers, button your buttons and hook those hooks. Zippers and hooks will easily snag other clothing, and cause holes. If you can avoid using a dryer, your clothes will last so much longer.

One of my favorite flour tortilla meals:

Put oil in a skillet Heat the pan.
Add a flour tortilla. Let it get a bit brown on both sides (you flip it halfway through). Remove from heat and put on a plate.
Add some mango chutney. It's a good condiment to have around that you can buy at the store. You can make your own, but it's not necessary. Spread it over the tortilla.
Add previously caramelized onions. Recipe here: https://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/how_to_caramelize_onions/ It's a useful recipe to have as it's just slow cooking onions. You can use them in so many things.
Add leftover turkey. See below.
Add cranberry sauce (see below), roll up the tortilla and eat. It's got protein, vitamin, carbs, and tastes so good.

When the holidays hit, if you have the freezer space, consider getting a frozen turkey. It doesn't cost much, and you'll get so much out of it. There are also many programs where you can get a free turkey in November. Thaw it in your fridge. Brine the turkey. A brine is a salt water soak for meat. You can add spices if you like, but the salt is key. This denatures the protein in the meat and makes for a more tender turkey. Roast the turkey. There are a million recipes out there.

My favorite covers the breast in thick sliced bacon. If you think turkey is dry, it's because the dark meat in the legs isn't cooked until it reaches 175 to 180 degrees. The breast is done at 170 degrees. Cooking the breast over 170 degrees dries it out. Let the turkey cool and remove the meat. Use the bones to make the best soup stock.

I love cranberry sauce. I buy the fresh cranberries in November and freeze for the rest of the year. My favorite recipe uses port (it's super cheap fortified wine that will last forever), fresh cranberries, orange juice (make it from concentrate), orange zest and sugar. It only takes minutes to cook. The recipe has converted cranberry haters that only know it from eating it from a can at Thanksgiving.


Cornbread cooked in a skillet is easy and not expensive.

I collect Southern cookbooks and they're full of cheap, delicious and relatively healthy recipes. I've never deep fried food in my life. Edna Lewis is my favorite Southern chef.

And Shepherd's Pie is just meatloaf, covered in veggies, topped with mashed potatoes and baked. This is my favorite recipe:

 
People way over complicate banana bread. You don't need 8 sticks of butter and 9 kilos of sugar. Skip the sugar and butter altogether and use maple syrup if you need a sweetner, and go for oil instead. Any oil you have will work. Cheaper than the butter and sugar. Add in a cup or so of rolled oats for xtra fiber and nutrients.

you can use oats(*) as an add in for any ground meats to make it stretch further. Oats are butt cheap and can be thrown into pretty much anything to stretch it. (Especially good if you don't like rice or beans. Oats just absorb the flavor of whatever you're cooking anyway and you probably won't even taste them.) Works really well if you're making pancakes or waffles too.

* i mean the actual uncooked rolled oats not the quaker instant shit. You can buy a can of rolled oats at the dollar store. And you'll feel all healthy for using them!

Liquid soaps and shampoos can be watered down as well if you need it to last for a bit longer. Same goes for laundry detergent if you're using the liquid.

coffee grinds and eggshells can be added to plants/soil if you're looking to eliminate some waste. I think I read somewhere that cooled pasta water is also good for plants.

If you use butter, when the stick is out, freeze the wrapper instead of tossing. You can scrape extra butter off the wrapper once it's frozen.

Learn what to do with lard. Bacon grease can be used in place of oil in virtually any recipe. There's even a recipe for bacon grease molasses cookies that are bomb af. (No they don't taste like bacon unless you're really really trying to taste it.) Keep it to fry taters in. Use it to make quick biscuits. Cook eggs in it, etc.

If you need things like toiletries and soaps and detergents, just straight up ask on Facebook. There will almost always be someone willing to give some to you or a church that can help you out. This can be a great way to learn about resources in your community that you may not know about.

If you have fresh produce that you know you probably won't get to in time or have a lot of a particular vegetable and are sick of eating it, chop it, roast it with salt and pepper and then blend that up with some stock. (Whatever you want) freeze it and save for soup and stew bases or a really easy soup itself. Strawberry tops can be boiled/cooled for a fancy fruit water.

Dont eat Jimmy dean breakfast bowls and hot pockets for every meal.
 
Unless you are very physically active and/or have a demanding job, you don't need to eat three times a day (bar medical requirements). I only eat breakfast and dinner, and maybe if I get hungry in between I'll eat a couple of crackers. Most people eat too much. Do remember to eat breakfast though, it's essential for keeping your blood sugar up during the day, even if it's just a light meal of cereal. Without breakfast you're likely to end up overeating later on.

If you're lucky enough to acquire fresh spinach or kale, the excess you can't eat straight away can be pureed in a blender, poured into an ice cube tray and frozen. The cubes last for months and months in the freezer. They are delicious in a smoothie with an old frozen banana and a bit of apple for sweetness. If you have a little spare cash, consider buying some matcha powder. It makes a green smoothie taste absolutely amazing.

Speaking of matcha, and of tea in general, if tea is something you really enjoy, visit a Chinese or Asian grocery store. They will usually have a wide range of teas for much cheaper than is in a supermarket, and the tea will be better quality than its cheap supermarket counterparts too. If you're prone to snacking, I recommend you invest in a good tea collection. Tea satisfies the tastebuds and engages the mouth, which is exactly what boredom snacking is about. It's also good to make up cold and keep in the fridge for ice tea, as an alternative to expensive juice or soft drink.

If you're absolutely desperate for a snack, buy popcorn. Not microwave popcorn, loose corn like this:

082983.jpg

See this? It's $3.30 at Woolies. That's a shitload of popcorn, and will keep you in crunchy goodness for ages. It's easy to pop on the stove and just needs a little oil in the saucepan. (You can also pop it in the microwave using a paper bag, but in my personal experience, it just makes the popcorn taste like paper bag.) It lasts forever in the pantry if you keep it in an airtight container.
 
(You can also pop it in the microwave using a paper bag, but in my personal experience, it just makes the popcorn taste like paper bag.)
I've never really run into this. Maybe paper bags hit different in the land of Oz.

Popcorn is definitely the cheapest snack you can make though, and it's actually pretty damn good for you as long as you're not loading it down with butter.
 
Unless you are very physically active and/or have a demanding job, you don't need to eat three times a day (bar medical requirements). I only eat breakfast and dinner, and maybe if I get hungry in between I'll eat a couple of crackers. Most people eat too much. Do remember to eat breakfast though, it's essential for keeping your blood sugar up during the day, even if it's just a light meal of cereal. Without breakfast you're likely to end up overeating later on.

If you're lucky enough to acquire fresh spinach or kale, the excess you can't eat straight away can be pureed in a blender, poured into an ice cube tray and frozen. The cubes last for months and months in the freezer. They are delicious in a smoothie with an old frozen banana and a bit of apple for sweetness. If you have a little spare cash, consider buying some matcha powder. It makes a green smoothie taste absolutely amazing.

Speaking of matcha, and of tea in general, if tea is something you really enjoy, visit a Chinese or Asian grocery store. They will usually have a wide range of teas for much cheaper than is in a supermarket, and the tea will be better quality than its cheap supermarket counterparts too. If you're prone to snacking, I recommend you invest in a good tea collection. Tea satisfies the tastebuds and engages the mouth, which is exactly what boredom snacking is about. It's also good to make up cold and keep in the fridge for ice tea, as an alternative to expensive juice or soft drink.

If you're absolutely desperate for a snack, buy popcorn. Not microwave popcorn, loose corn like this:

View attachment 3649675

See this? It's $3.30 at Woolies. That's a shitload of popcorn, and will keep you in crunchy goodness for ages. It's easy to pop on the stove and just needs a little oil in the saucepan. (You can also pop it in the microwave using a paper bag, but in my personal experience, it just makes the popcorn taste like paper bag.) It lasts forever in the pantry if you keep it in an airtight container.
Instead of a bag, why not just use a glass or ceramic bowl and put a tea-towel over it?

 
You can buy a can of rolled oats at the dollar store. And you'll feel all healthy for using them!
Dollar Tree is a godsend for poorfags. Yeah, the prices jumped from $1 to $1.25, but it's still cheaper to buy a 4 pack of toilet paper, bar soap, dried beans, canned goods, rice, and other things from there than Whole Foods.
 
I don't like recommending buying things on a thread to save money, but something that may be worth it is a dehumidifier.

Almost all houses are humid, due to cooking, showering, hanging up wet clothes, and breathing. A dehumidifier can help with this. It serves several money-saving functions:

  • Dries clothes indoors fairly quickly, without the expense of a tumble drier. It's not as quick as a tumble drier but it's twice as quick as just hanging them up.
  • High humidity makes cold feel colder, so you could save money on heating. That tipping point for when you need to turn the heating on will be lower. I met a Romanian lady who now lives in one of the warmest, sunniest parts of the UK, where the average winter temperatures are 3 C' at night and 8.5 C' in the day. She finds the cold so much harder to deal with here because the UK is a very humid country, whereas even though it gets down to -20 C' in Romania, it's not humid so it doesn't feel that bad. She says the cold here gets right into your bones.
  • When you do put the heating on, it heats up much quicker than if there's no excess humidity, so you can turn the heating off quicker.
  • Humidity also makes heat feel hotter, so you could save on air conditioning; in some climates you may need to put the air con on at some point, but again, that tipping point will be higher.
  • It helps prevent costly damage to your house and furnishings caused by high humidity, including mould.

I have one and have benefitted from all of the above. Also my house just feels so much nicer to be in, you don't realise how unpleasant permanent high humidity is until it's gone.

You can get dehumidifiers fairly affordably second-hand.
 
Last edited:
Back