Tiberius Rising Tiberius Rising Chapter 15

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Soew

"Hate Crimes in Cyberspace"
kiwifarms.net
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Apr 10, 2014
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new Tiberius Rising chapter
http://www.booksie.com/war_and_military/novel/parkourdude91/tiberius-rising/chapter/15
 
http://www.booksie.com/war_and_military/novel/parkourdude91/tiberius-rising/chapter/15

This mostly continues from the last chapter, with more "action-packed" bullshit mixed in with some melodramatic speeches and insane continuity errors. As to be expected. It's basically the entire book in a nutshell. Highlights:
  • Stryker brutally tortures another Muslim for no reason
  • Stryker gives an insane bad guy villian speech on a Muslim radio station and sets a Q'uran on fire and all the radio listeners somehow recognize that he's doing it purely from the sound of a Q'uran burning
  • Stryker builds an insane McGyver esque "multi grenade" that involves attaching a bunch of grenades to a string and then throwing the string which somehow turns them into cluster bombs, Jace literally doesn't know how grenades work and think that removing the safety pin is what sets the fuse on them
  • Stryker does parkour again, Ramirez manages to sprint at 25mph despite being in 75 pounds of bulky armor, presumably carrying at least 50 pounds of other gear (spare ammo, survival stuff, first aid kit, food, water, etc), and carrying a fucking light machinegun. For reference, the world record fastest human run speed is 27 MPH
  • Stryker and Ramirez parachute out of an exploding building in "slow motion" and Jace compares them to American eagles
  • Stryker lights up a Cuban cigar with the muzzle flash on his sidearm
 
Copied from the chapter 14 thread:

You know, I predicted that the story will end with Stryker, now Master of the US, launching a missile at every primarily Muslim nation Jace can think of (or just at the Middle East). The way the story's going, it might just happen.

And we finally found out why it's named Tiberius Rising! Stryker's callsign is Tiberius... which went unmentioned until now.
 
" There was also debris everywhere now." stryker
Panda Alpha Foxtrot
Jace literally doesn't know how grenades work and think that removing the safety pin is what sets the fuse on them
Pull the pin and let the spoon pop open. The spoon holds the spring loaded firing pin up. /sperg
 
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How much did Jace masturbate to that chapter?
Also, an interesting point - Jace refers to F-22s as bombers. Putting my natural military sperging aside for a minute - this actually links back to a thread on Fuck Yeah Deagles in about February 2013, when Jace posted a promotional image from Battlefield 3 and sperged about it, saying shit like "F22 strike inbound dude tahahaa sick bro". Now, naturally, he got told hard by the scores of watching /k/ommandos that the F-22 doesn't do bombing, but he got really pissed off and carried on defending the point despite the fact that it had turned into a major shitstorm. Does he never learn? Is this his way of telling himself that he was right all along?
 
Kind of busy so my analysis can wait. While converting this stuff for my EPUB version, I noted that the name of the company that runs the Booksie website.
© 2013 TheNextBigWriter, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Oh, Jace's writing is totally bestseller material. For certain target demographics anyway.
 
Coughing the man took out a CD and put it in the radio, putting on the muslim call to prayer. Stryker mentally blocked it out, resisting the music's subliminal effects.
 
Rendering my analysis now.

These fucking chapters are neurotic.
 
"him and Styyker dived out of the window in
slow motion side by side like two American eagles like in
assassins creed or something when the guy jumps off the tower and
everything."

man knows how to paint a picture
Using parachutes. Totally not like in Assassin's Creed, where you leap into a conveniently placed pile of straw.

Why would he be on the side of the Assassins anyway? They originated as a Muslim cult, after all. Surely he's on the side of the good capitalist Templars?
 
If have two thoughts in my mind right now
1: Try to remove Tiberius Rising from booksie to see his reaction
or the much better option
2: Try to gain faith in Humanity.
 
But have Stryker's crushed balls been tended to? (:_(
He also left the last chapter in a cliffhanger when ramirez (sic) alerted everyone with his screams! Of course, Stryker, the chief stealth tactician, decides to make sure everyone is alerted anyway by messing with the radio stuff in the stealth-to-the-max sound-proofed radio room. ...and here I thought the whole deal with the wristwatch porn in earlier chapters was that the guys could sneak in totally, totally undetected during the salaat.

Under Stryker's command, everything is so consistent! And stealthy!
 
I was kind of curious about the origin of the name "Jenkins" so I did a quick search on it. As it turns out, Jenkins is an English surname, not an Irish one. Not that I would expect Jace to be smart enough to grasp a smaller detail like that but come on.

I'm probably not the first person to point this out, but Tiberious Rising feels like a retelling of Team America without any wit, irony or self-awareness.
 
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