Today I have... Thread.

[TungstenCarbide]

Today I've spent the best part of a hour trying to identify a particular species of spider that usually begins to manifest itself in my house at the end of Summer. Starting with September, until the end of October, I have to pay attention to not to leave my windows open for too long, or these huge fuckers enter and scare me and my cat (that usually is more than happy to eat spiders, but he's afraid of these ones, who knows why).

They are bigger than the average spiders I usually see (I live in Italy in a rural zone), 6-7 cm long, brown, their eyes reflect light like they have tapetum lucidum. I'm still puzzling about them.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

Today I have been waking up early these past few days because contractors are renovating our house. I’ve managed to slip back and forth between productive and carelessly lazy, but now I’m looking into getting a certificate in a course that I never took in university. (Something technical, perhaps).

All in all, I can’t complain. It beats most days waking up so late that you sometimes forget what you’re supposed to do in the middle of the day.

 

[Dysnomia]

I found a really nice wooden chair abandoned on one of those traffic islands. I hope it's not haunted.

 

[Rafal Gan Ganowicz]

Done frustrating personal admin shit online, talked shit, cooked some stew, and snorted aprox 1/ 2 a gram of Bolivia's Best

Found an almost new Brother P-Touch label maker in a thrift store for $3. It was in the toys section. I guess somebody thought it was a Speak and Spell or something.

Sounds like a Jesuit from Compton

 

[Kiwi Lime Pie]

Today, I have...

• Finished my ongoing project to file/organize all the records I'll need to take with me once I officially assume ownership of my late boss' business.
• Replaced the failing power supply in my desktop with a new one that has sufficient wattage for a replacement part I installed last week.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

I think I visited the worst dollar tree in existence.
I know you're saying all dollar trees are bad but this one was especially cluttered, filthy and full of confused people. No nursing home nearby, no bums,so, why?

It was converted from a defunct retail store less than a year ago and it looks like they didn't try too hard in that conversion.

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

Today I survived an assassination attempt from a small pebble that snuck itself under one of my skateboard wheels. Fell in just about the worst way and landed right on my knee, which is now very swollen and skinned but is otherwise ok. Now I'll have some cool bruises. I'm just happy I got to go out and ride at all with how bad the air quality has been. Today is the first time I've seen a blue sky in a while.
And then on the way home I helped an older lady open a bottle so I felt like a good citizen.

 

[Celebrate Nite]

Today I went fishing on a boat with 30 other people for like 5 hours. The catch was Fluke. I made 5 catches today. 1 Baby Sea Robin, 1 Baby Sea Bass, and 3 Fluke, Couldn't keep any of the Fluke since they were short (I think the minimal length accepted was either 15 or 19 inches)

 

[judge claude frollo]

today I listened to an authentic niggo fight outside of my house. Go figure it's the only house with niggos in my neighborhood. Otherwise it's usually peaceful.

 

[Wraith]

Went to a store and bought nothing.

 

[AnOminous]

Gotten $138 poorer and one cat closer to being a crazy cat dude.

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

Today I learned Markiplier won an award for making a nude calendar

it’s an award from the Cancer Research Institute and he won it because all the proceeds went to fund cancer research(over half a million in two days), but my initial description was More fun to say.

 

[Kiwi Lime Pie]

Today, I received an email from a software vendor trying to get the office to renew for the coming year. I did a doubletake when I read the date that the offer was valid until: September 31.

 

[Wraith]

Went out for a workout in level 3 in the light of a full moon. Saw 3 skunks, a raccoon, 2 kitties, a stork under a bridge (not kidding, was led to it,) and a bunny.
...
The skunks don't mind me. I wear a special cloak that looks like a skunk's coloring, i think. ... I don't know how I feel about that.

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

In a moment of self-hatred, cropped off half of my hair (never gave myself haircuts beforehands).

 

[The Real SVP]

Today I tried all day to get Scarlet Johansson to fuck a dick-girl with an enormous penis. I ended up with a blowjob and consider it a huge success. Tomorrow I'll add sound effects, and maybe improve the animations and AI for the dick-girl. Such is the life of a VR dev.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

I fell asleep with a dip in, woke up sneezing and blasted a whole wad of wintergreen cope all over the wall. I have done this to windshields awake before.

 

[Clockwork_PurBle]

Rode my bike around the neighborhood earlier, went to turn left and reached to turn my blinker on. Had a panic attack when I realized I didn't have a blinker and therefore couldn't singal turns. Then I remembered I was on a bike.

Wasn't high or drunk or anything. Just had a mental bruh moment.

 

[Nut-Roaster the 2nd]

I finally got on a scale, and found that I've finally dropped to 177 from my starting point at 190. 110, here I come!

 

[Clockwork_PurBle]

One of my professors asked us to bring our best joke to class today. I am going to try to do an Aristrocrats joke.