TGWTG Tony Goldmark / "Some Jerk with A Camera" - Some Jerk with a Trust Fund

Mola Ram said:
Shocking as it might be, and as a Bob-loather of long standing, and as someone who's always been more lukewarm about Tony, I actually think Tony looks worse. At least Bob takes better care of both his head and facial hair, and there's something about Tony's peculiar grief-stricken expression that's legit unsettling.

I can't believe I'm going to say this, but Bob's expressions look warmer and more human.

And yet ... Bob is the Aeternal Virgin and Tony, at last check, had a girlfriend of some tenure. Guess there's no ill money can't cure.
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Bob, for all his many many flaws, has at least some concept of personal hygiene. He makes some effort at presentation. Even if the thing being presented is Bob.

Tony is like those fat tubbo humans in Wall-e. His sense of personal maintenance stopped developing somewhere around 2 years old. Other parties take care of his lifes needs. And he ignores everything else.
 
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Mola Ram said:
Shocking as it might be, and as a Bob-loather of long standing, and as someone who's always been more lukewarm about Tony, I actually think Tony looks worse. At least Bob takes better care of both his head and facial hair, and there's something about Tony's peculiar grief-stricken expression that's legit unsettling.

I can't believe I'm going to say this, but Bob's expressions look warmer and more human.

And yet ... Bob is the Aeternal Virgin and Tony, at last check, had a girlfriend of some tenure. Guess there's no ill money can't cure.
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You make a compelling point. BUT don't forget that there's more to beauty pageants too. So likewise we would have events where they have to demonstrate personality and talents as well.

Bob could rack up quite a negative score there. Tony's pretty vile too but he has some awareness of when to shut up sometimes.
 
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Mola Ram said:
Shocking as it might be, and as a Bob-loather of long standing, and as someone who's always been more lukewarm about Tony, I actually think Tony looks worse. At least Bob takes better care of both his head and facial hair, and there's something about Tony's peculiar grief-stricken expression that's legit unsettling.

I can't believe I'm going to say this, but Bob's expressions look warmer and more human.

And yet ... Bob is the Aeternal Virgin and Tony, at last check, had a girlfriend of some tenure. Guess there's no ill money can't cure.
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Skidmark was married for a number of years, but it was a sexless marriage for the most part, and Skidmark basically expected his wife to cook, clean, and wait on him like a child. He essentially replaced Dead Mommy with Wife Mommy and never upheld his husbandly duties. So his wife split and ended up having a couple of boyfriends at the same time IIRC. It's been a few years since the ex-Mrs. Skidmark provided us all the deets on what a shitty husband Tony is.
 
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The Dude said:
Skidmark was married for a number of years, but it was a sexless marriage for the most part, and Skidmark basically expected his wife to cook, clean, and wait on him like a child. He essentially replaced Dead Mommy with Wife Mommy and never upheld his husbandly duties. So his wife split and ended up having a couple of boyfriends at the same time IIRC. It's been a few years since the ex-Mrs. Skidmark provided us all the deets on what a shitty husband Tony is.
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He's pretty much a real-life Bill Dauterive, being a typical retard loser who expects his ex-wife to last long, but is a fatass that has fallen under absolute depression
 
TVB said:
He's pretty much a real-life Bill Dauterive, being a typical retard loser who expects his ex-wife to last long, but is a fatass that has fallen under absolute depression
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That is a horrifying insult to Bill. He was only ever nice and doting to the women we saw him date.

Plus he was a veteran and drove a tank. (Ain't no way Tony there can even fit inside one.)
 
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IMG_8977.jpeg

LOL
 
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Flexo said:
One almost wants to see like a reverse miss america pageant - a kind of 'horror america' pageant - where we see who can be the ugliest.

And yeah, I think Tony & Bob are close competitors right now.
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I propose that such a hypothetical contest include a test of intelligence, administered before the judges.

Watching Shitbrick and The Eternal Virgin race to out-stupid one another would be comedy gold!
 
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The Dude said:
Skidmark was married for a number of years, but it was a sexless marriage for the most part, and Skidmark basically expected his wife to cook, clean, and wait on him like a child. He essentially replaced Dead Mommy with Wife Mommy and never upheld his husbandly duties. So his wife split and ended up having a couple of boyfriends at the same time IIRC. It's been a few years since the ex-Mrs. Skidmark provided us all the deets on what a shitty husband Tony is.
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The profile of his "girlfriend" paints a pretty vivid picture as well.
 
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Tony Goldmark thinks people are wrong for prioritizing personal comfort. I wonder how this trust-fund baby, reputedly with several million dollars to his name, sacrificed his personal comfort for the greater good.
gold.jpg
 
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Positron said:
Tony Goldmark thinks people are wrong for prioritizing personal comfort. I wonder how this trust-fund baby, reputedly with several million dollars to his name, sacrificed his personal comfort for the greater good.
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Has this fat, greasy weirdo whose only fame came from lurking around children's amusement parks even foregone a single meal or snack for the public good?
 
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Positron said:
Tony Goldmark thinks people are wrong for prioritizing personal comfort. I wonder how this trust-fund baby, reputedly with several million dollars to his name, sacrificed his personal comfort for the greater good.
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I doubt Skidmark has THAT much money. Maybe, MAYBE he was left a million or two, but I'm betting it was under a million. I think if he had the kind of money you're talking about he would have a much more lavish lifestyle, would be able to own his own home, and wouldn't have to have roommates (IIRC). Even if you add the JewToob stuff to his trust fund duckets, he wouldn't have much more because he was never that successful. He's no Markiplier or Mr. Beast. He's got enough to live a modest, comfortable life without working a real job. Thanks Mommy Skidmark!
 
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Positron said:
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For those who don't know, the nerd game Magic The Gathering recently did a "western" themed set - a fantasy western themed set in fact.

Did it have guns? No, those are problematic.
Did it have cowboys vs indians? No, that's problematic.
So what made it western? Literally just hats and deserts.

Basically, people aren't upset about cowboy orcs, we just all know you're going to half-ass this shit.
 
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Goldmark defends the honor of someone with a female first name.
gold-dan.jpg
 
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