Lovequest Updated OKC Profile

[CalmMyTits]

His porn collection is LARGE... because those dang dirty trolls wouldn't buy it for $1000

Wasn't that lost in the fire?

 

[Tubular Monkey]

God dammit. This was supposed to be the slam dunk question. The "Hey you never know. You both hate pedos so at least you have that." He fucks that up. Dammit Chris.

STRAIGHT pedophiles ONLY!

 

[Tootsie Bear]

Wasn't that lost in the fire?

I remember he was trying to sell an abundance of porn DVD's through Craig's list. Maybe he just gave them away. "FREE PORN!"

 

[RP 520]

Chris is part of the 1%.

Also: send lego.

Yes, everything we work for goes to him. Fair distribution in his eyes.

 

[Blueberry]

OkCreepy

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Brother, I find it hard to believe he is having trouble finding a woman interested in him

 

[CalmMyTits]

I remember he was trying to sell an abundance of porn DVD's through Craig's list. Maybe he just gave them away. "FREE PORN!"

The Craisglist thing was before the fire, sometime last fall IIRC.

 

[tobacky_vapor]

Brother, I find it hard to believe he is having trouble finding a woman interested in him

Well Hulkster, that's due to 3 reasons:

1. He doesn't take his vitamins
2. He doesn't say his prayers anymore
3. He never trains

 

[Blueberry]

Well Hulkster, that's due to 3 reasons:

1. He doesn't take his vitamins
2. He doesn't say his prayers anymore
3. He never trains

4. He never showers

 

[Tootsie Bear]

4. He never showers

5. He also shits his breeches.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

First of all, how was this originally posted on Sunday but I'm only now seeing it?

Second, I really don't feel like doing the usual "He looks birdy" comment today…

Third…

Oh Chris, you stupid, birdy-looking idiot. When are you going to learn that it doesn't work the way you think it works? Women do not randomly start flirting with men. They are the receivers!

Well time to analyze this new megathread.

 

[Ry-Guy]

Brother, I find it hard to believe he is having trouble finding a woman interested in him

Looking like a obese, greasy tranny Sammy Hagar isn't helping him either.

 

[NiggoFiggo]

Let me wrap my mind around this, he hates the homos but dont mind getting ass play, all homos are evil but he would bang a transgender. He would date other "tomgirls" so that means another man that is a "tomgirl" is right up his alley?

 

[alterid]

I don't think he has any idea how to take care of long hair. It just looks so stringy and nasty. He must hardly ever wash it, and he certainly isn't brushing or conditioning that mess.

Spoiler: Intense Hair Talk

Chris has mentioned that he uses one specific brand of shampoo and conditioner. I don't recall for sure but it might have been Garnier Fructis. Chris is extremely brand loyal so odds are he's been using this and only this since he began his Long Hair Quest.

So even if he's washing every day, twice a day and conditioning every single time he's got a buildup of silicones on his hair from the GF conditioner, creating a barrier against moisture. So his hair is literally drying out despite the fact that he thinks he's doing the best thing for it using an 'awesome' brand with persuasive advertising. That's why it looks so nasty and frizzy and unkempt and it might be frustrating for him since he thinks he's doing good things for it.

Basically he should be clarifying that mess once a month or so if he's only going to use one single brand.

 

[Marvin]

Let me wrap my mind around this, he hates the homos but dont mind getting ass play, all homos are evil but he would bang a transgender. He would date other "tomgirls" so that means another man that is a "tomgirl" is right up his alley?

I think he's saying he'd fuck biological girls as well as men transitioning to be women. I think that's the case mostly because of his amusing/weird reactions to Bailey Jay in the mailbags.

 

[tepid]

Can't believe one of his fave shows is Keeping Up Appearances, too funny.

 

[Ahffline]

Chris' new pictures reminded me of somebody.

Spoiler

 

[Ti-99/4A]

Can't believe one of his fave shows is Keeping Up Appearances, too funny.

Ugh! I could barely sit through the last 2 minutes of that show while I waited for Red Dwarf to air.

 

[CalmMyTits]

I created an OKC profile a few hours ago, just out of curiosity, and the chance that I might meet a nice guy. I got thirteen messages within a hour. Some seemed nice, a few were perverts. I honestly wasn't expecting that many messages and I got overwhelmed by it. It'll be a while before I log back in, and I'm afraid to because of any messages I might get while I'm not logged in.

It's almost laughable how different my profile is than Chris' own, and how much more success I have on it despite the limited effort I put into making my profile. If Chris ever wants to have even a tiny, little modicum of success, he is going to need someone to help him revamp his profile and delete some of these questions.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Oh my God who did Chris see on TV to make him decide to pose and "smile" like this? I bet I know, but I'm keeping this one to myself