Was Chris' dry-up inevitable?

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The well isn't empty, it's just that our bucket is incapable of reaching the water.

In other words, Chris will never stop being a lolcow, he doesn't have the willpower to make the changes to legitimately correct himself. Why he appears dry is because he's not going on camera the way he used to. But as the last 12 months show, he still gets up to all sorts of zany shenanigans whether it's because of the trolls or not.
 
Unless I'm greatly mistaken about the floorplan of their rental house, Chris' bedroom is upstairs, and so is Barb's, technically. I don't see Barb climbing a whole staircase every night to go to sleep, though. I'm guessing she and Chris nest in the downstairs front room (which also explains the sheets blocking the windows).
Heh, well, it wouldn't be Barb who would be climbing the stairs.

He really doesn't stick out much in Ruckersville, due to the pervasive inbred rednecks and white trash that fill local businesses. Chris, dressed like a crazy homeless tomgirl, blends in. Also, as Marvin has said before, Chris is a huge pussy. When he goes out, he's usually very quiet, and wary of strangers, paranoid of the trolls. Sure, every now and then he'll act out, like his vandalism at Walmart, but for 99% of the time, he's not noticeable at all unless you recognize him.
This. Really, people way overestimate the significance of "weird" out in public. The problem with Chris being interesting on the street is that in order to figure out what you're looking at, you have to analyze him. Like, sure, he'll pop up in your vision, compared to other people, because he's slightly distinctive. And I really mean that, he's only slightly distinctive. His hair looks like dried straw, unless he's started taking better care of it in the past two weeks (which is possible, but maybe not likely). So that might pop up. Or maybe he decided to put on makeup this morning. (Don't think that happens, but maybe Chris might have a weird whim one day this year or something)

Otherwise, Chris is a lot less interesting on the street than you'd really think.

And once you've noticed him, you have to pause for a moment to specifically pick out what's weird about him. He's wearing women's boots, he's wearing mom jeans, he's oogling you in a weird way. And sure, at that point, you might laugh at him.

But overall, I don't think his patterns are consistent enough for anyone to notice him regularly, let alone for him to become a local celebrity.

Does anyone actually want a return to his random online insanity? There's frankly very little he could do that wouldn't just be variations on what he's already done. He isn't exactly a renaissance man. He can talk about a handful of things. What I find far, far more interesting is what he gets up to entirely on his own, without internet influences, without people pulling the strings, and without anyone else to blame but himself. Finding out how he got banned from Walmart was better than anything that people feeding him lines ever achieved.

He's going to get himself jailed left to his own devices. I've said it in the past, I think that he was kept out of a lot of trouble in his twenties because of the amount of time he spent online living in the fantasy world of Clyde Cash, Pickle People, and Innernetsweethearts.
Well, scripting Chris' activity is definitely boring. We did it back in the day because we thought Chris was so ridiculous, that he couldn't possibly fall for our completely obvious plot. And then he did. So we started trying to see how far we could push it, would we ever reach a point where even Chris is smart enough to notice? We thought there had to be a limit, but there wasn't. Like yeah, at this point, everyone knows that if you tell Chris to do it, he will do it. There's no question about that anymore.

But I don't think leaving Chris to his devices is necessarily the best alternative. It does get results, but I definitely think you could improve on it. I think the best technique is to put Chris in interesting situations, and just observe how he handles them.

Chris puts himself in interesting situations just on his own. But instead of just sitting around, waiting for Chris to do it, you could do it yourself. Chris might do it tomorrow, sure, or he could stay inside with Barb, crying, for a year and a half.

Active trolling is definitely the most optimal way to get amusement out of Chris, at least at some point. (Of course, we're just bored with Chris, so we have new interests nowadays)
 
Initially read as Chris has to carry Barb up the stairs. Can we make this official continuity because this would be hilarious.
Nope, we already know that Barb is currently stronger than Chris, so if anything it'd be the other way around.
Besides, if Chris tried carrying Barb he'd just drop her, and she'd have a DIRTY, CRACKED PELVIS.
 
I'm still convinced we're going to see him returning to facebook.

Which is fine with me. I don't mind that we're probably going to never get youtube videos out of him again. Reading his self important rants about unimportant shit that happens to him every day is a lot more entertaining than getting more videos of him humping blowup dolls.
 
As wary of the internet as he is, unless there's people really following him around town for information, I believe Marvin when he says the big juicy online content we gorged on is long gone now. In the end this is the way the CWC will end, not with a bang of crapped briefs, but like the stench of rotten watermelon sashaying in the wind.
 
Heh, why? Who would he be talking to?
He's still got a couple of white knights, hasn't he? Or has Anna finally abandoned him?

More importantly, did it ever matter if anyone really listened to him beforehand? With how self-important he is he'll probably convince himself that some of the people on his friends list are still TRUE and HONEST pals who read every post he makes with the dedication of a medieval monk who's working on some illuminated manuscript. He's always been disconnected pretty hard from reality.
 
Heh, well, it wouldn't be Barb who would be climbing the stairs.


Chris might do it tomorrow, sure, or he could stay inside with Barb, crying, for a year and a half.

That boy needs to learn to get a hold of his emotions.
 
He's still got a couple of white knights, hasn't he? Or has Anna finally abandoned him?

More importantly, did it ever matter if anyone really listened to him beforehand? With how self-important he is he'll probably convince himself that some of the people on his friends list are still TRUE and HONEST pals who read every post he makes with the dedication of a medieval monk who's working on some illuminated manuscript. He's always been disconnected pretty hard from reality.
He just PMs Anna.

Well, and yeah, he thought people were listening to him. As far as he's concerned, he still has friends on facebook, but he communicates with them via private posts.
 
He actually socialized on Facebook? Thats kinda surprising.
I think at this point he just messages various people in his contact list with his latest whinge, and they either ignore or asspat as they see fit. It counts as socialization, of a sort, but not by much.
 
I dunno whats with Marvin needing to point out they stopped trolling Chris when Bob died, when the reality is that Chris had really been drying up on a regular basis since the Wallflower incident.

Let me tell you something, he was genuinely upset and this was the first time his trolled life had gotten in the way of his real friendships. None of us actually know what could have been if the trolls didn't interfere with the Wallflower. All his threats to remain off the internet that Spring were true and honest. He only came back when prodded and when he wanted to bitch about the Cleveland Show.

But on the flip side, I want to point out something concurrent that was happening on the internet, the destruction of the CWCipedia. Post-Wallflower, Chris seemed to have a little interest in continuing Sonichu, as in one of the Post-Wallflower videos (the Abstinence one) he mentions "Updates are to come on the CWCipedia."

However, thanks to that fucking Mao's scheme to constantly vandalize the CWCipedia, Chris just gave up because it was the easy way out. Again, we don't know what could have been if CWCipedia was just left alone.

And honestly, Jackie and Thorg did not live up to the likes of Ivy and Liquid and Asperchu.

Point is, Post-Wallflower, none of the content was continuous enough, and when it was, it was clearly all scripted.

I agree, to an extent.
But I think we all know what would have happened without troll intervention, the wallflower would been just like Megan. I was already slowly becoming that, with his pushiness about meeting up constantly.

I too noticed that ever since the fall of the cwcipedia Chris just seemed to start resenting his Sonichu "fanbase".
I wish it never went as far as to completely destroy it. I did enjoy Asperchu's saga after all .

And I agree about Jackie . She was always nagging Chris about doing more videos. The costume videos he put up were one of the most boring ones I've seen. But overall she was so annoying during the emails that it was Chris who ended up breaking contact with Jackie at that time (from what I remember of those batch of emails). I thought it was impressive, not even Kacey managed to bitch at him that much.

When Bob died that was Thorg's Calling out Saga, I don't think anything of value was lost when they decided to stop it.
But hearing Chris bitching about how Ahuviya was a homo, while dressing in tomgirl garb and makeup reached his amount of hypocrisy and douchy-ness to a new level.
 
Thorg's saga was shit because Thorg was awful at being the so-called "Master Troll" of the saga. He'd always frequent /cow/ but would only post stupid poems and random bits of lulz only he can provide since he was the one in "control" of everything.

Like the pic in my sig, before they were removed, said, he just got real lucky Chris started to communicate with him. The Tomgirl forum had nothing to do with the Calling Out saga, but it did just serve to create the association Chris had with Thorg. If Chris didn't go back to the Tomgirl forum talking about being MOCKED HORRIBLY, then Thorg wouldn't have gotten the association. I was there when the Tomgirl forum was unraveling.

Oh also, WRISTWATCHS FUCKING WRISTWATCHES Goddamn you Thorg. F-
 
How can Chris be a cross-dresser tomgirl and be a homophobe ? Arent those things mutually exclusive?
 
How can Chris be a cross-dresser tomgirl and be a homophobe ? Arent those things mutually exclusive?
Chris believes he embodies certain qualities regardless of his actions, appearance and statements. He believes having a subscription to playboy makes him the living epitome of manliness and straightness so he can't understand how dressing like a woman and acting very feminine reflects on him. The same could be said about his attitude towards his religion. Chris views himself as a perfect Christian despite his very heretical views and actions. Now that I think about it...you could say the same about everything Chris believes he is.
 
How can Chris be a cross-dresser tomgirl and be a homophobe ? Arent those things mutually exclusive?

Not in Chris's world they aren't.

Only someone with such a screwed up view of sexuality could reson this way. Just enjoy it really, it's rare to encounter this level of hypocrisy outside of politics.
 
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