Weird and Cringe things you've seen while working in IT - Since everyone is too lazy to make such a thread where IT bros can vent

[WTBOnlineFather]

Working with pajeets is like a total assault on your sense of reality.

No matter how hard you try to explain, no matter how you word simple requests and how much you dumb it down, when you ask a jeet to do something, they're going to do something completely different and random, and they will never say a word about it until you check for yourself.

 

[BABANGUIDE64]

Sometimes they think they know better because they learned from some shitty wrong or outdated tutorial, and they will adamantly defend their knowledge and think you are wrong.

Have fun!

Who's worse: jeet or /g/ user?
inb4: No, there're not the same thing.

 

[Verpa Teutonica Ingens]

Who's worse: jeet or /g/ user?
inb4: No, there're not the same thing.

Jeet. /g/ users aren't usually given so much undeserved power to break things as Jeets often are.

 

[teriyakiburns]

Random memory popped up this morning:

client: The app is a bit slow this morning
(it's a CRM website, but whatever)
me: What does "a bit slow" mean?
client: I tried logging in and it took a while
me: Possibly a network issue. Let's take a look
me: When you said it took a while, did you mean "I couldn't log in because the site was displaying an error about the database being unavailable"?
client: I typed in my username and password, but nothing happened.
me: where??

 

[Gatdam Animal Person]

Behold, the most accurate depiction of IT support.
Can you tell me what is wrong in this picture? (Hint: it's not the Windows 10 on the laptop)

 

[teriyakiburns]

Can you tell me what is wrong in this picture?

Is the Youtube Arrow blocking the signal?

 

[666NASTYFUCKINGFREAK666]

Why are users always pissed and want to kill themselves?

Calm down, retards.

 

[Squishie PP]

View attachment 6432131
Behold, the most accurate depiction of IT support.
Can you tell me what is wrong in this picture? (Hint: it's not the Windows 10 on the laptop)

The laptop dock seems to have a specific (proprietary?) port for the laptop to connect to in order to transmit/receive data and user input, as indicated by the large red arrow. This is why the external screen is not working, if one is indeed plugged in.

 

[Gatdam Animal Person]

The laptop dock seems to have a specific (proprietary?) port for the laptop to connect to in order to transmit/receive data and user input, as indicated by the large red arrow. This is why the external screen is not working, if one is indeed plugged in.

Yeah, you're pretty much spot on. Anyone who has half of a critical-thinking brain will figure it out by themselves... Too bad that's something most of them lack.

Spoiler: USB C protocol spergjng

Little ACKTUALLY moment cause I like to sperg about computer hardware: those docks uses DisplayLink for their video outputs. Basically, it encodes video signals over USB, which allows the use of multple displays over a regular USB-C and USB-A connection. Windows and Mac supports DisplayLink out of the box, however Linux doesn't support it by default, you'll need to compile the driver by yourself.

USB-C is great since it supports data, video (DP) and power delivery, however those docks somehow don't use the video capabilities of USB, which makes them extremely compatible with any sort of corporate laptops.

...you'll still need to properly plug it in for it to work as expected.

 

[Zoosadist sadist]

Got some stories second hand. It's not IT itself, but our government office papershufflers have finally gotten computers, sharepoint, etc after the coof and it's been a disaster. Some greatest hits:

Everything got translated and some of the translations are downright hilarious. "Something went wrong" became something like "It went according to evil".

Everybody's sharing one network folder, everyone can do whatever they want to anybody else's shit, including deleting, and boss's stuff is part of the folder too.

They have some kind of chat/gpt assistant already. I haven't heard any stories of it hallucinating or otherwise being retarded, which only means the mongoloids working there haven't used it enough and didn't yet get the chance to be screwed over by what it tells them.

Somewhere in the legal code there's something to the effect of "Email communication can be either formal or informal, formal communication is when the recipient clicks on the message".

As a part of the job it's necessary to type in (or use copy/paste if you aren't retarded) big numbers to access case files. Person who told me this had to explain this concept to a coworker who said "I don't know all numbers are the same to me".

Also, something I've noticed at any IT department, even when everybody has settled on one thing like meet, moodle, whatever, there are always a few holdouts who just stick with microsoft versions of those. Always needed to email / password combinations at every place.

 

[Punished Magician]

"Something went wrong" became something like "It went according to evil".

It sounds like everything about this went "according to evil," which is officially the funniest phrase I've heard all week. It might just live rent-free in my head for the next few months.

 

[Caesar]

The idea of a university knowingly running a massive porn server (Cos 6TB doesn't just go unnoticed) is very lol to me.

I know, old post, but it's really, really not uncommon. Or wasn't anyway, I don't know about now. But back in the 90s and 00s, basically every uni had their own quasi-top-site hosted there for students, and IIRC some proper scene ones were actually hosted inside universities too.

DC++ used to be huge in school networks aswell.

 

[Reticulan Joe]

I know someone who, as a student, ran a big DC++ filesharing ring, limited to on-campus users only, for a couple of years. The network engineer knew about it - and was on first-name basis with the student, in fact - but was totally fine with it, because while it consumed a huge amount of bandwidth, it was all on-campus and therefore NBD. This was close to 20 years ago, when Youtube was shiny and new and everybody streaming "Charlie the Unicorn" or whatever would saturate the campus's connection to the outside world. So keeping all the traffic local was a win for all parties concerned - campus pipe doesn't saturate, it's invisible to RIAA/MPAA, and since it's vetted by your peers, less rando malware.

However, one day some shit-for-brains student, jazzed about the cool secret piracy ring, updated the college's Wikipedia article to advertise what a great thing it was. Needless to say, a secret piracy ring doesn't stay secret very long in those conditions, and the college's board of directors called the college's president, who called the IT director, who called the network engineer, who called up the student, "Hey, it sucks, but..."

And so the sharing ring was shut down, and the campus pipe was once again saturated with torrents and Youtube, and everyone was worse off. Thanks, anonymous fucking moron.

 

[Law]

My school also had a DC++ ring. We all got super into Dexter cause the guy who ran it was a big fan. I wonder what happened to it.

 

[Jang Joo]

Everything got translated and some of the translations are downright hilarious. "Something went wrong" became something like "It went according to evil".

It sounds like everything about this went "according to evil," which is officially the funniest phrase I've heard all week. It might just live rent-free in my head for the next few months.

That is so fucking hilarious

 

[Caesar]

My school also had a DC++ ring. We all got super into Dexter cause the guy who ran it was a big fan. I wonder what happened to it.

If I could bring back one thing about the earlier internet, it'd be the piracy scene. Man I miss it. Finding DC++ shares and eDonkey links on PeerWeb and shit. Huge, hard to sort through IRC servers and open FTP directories. It was so autistic, I loved it.

 

[Law]

If I could bring back one thing about the earlier internet, it'd be the piracy scene. Man I miss it. Finding DC++ shares and eDonkey links on PeerWeb and shit. Huge, hard to sort through IRC servers and open FTP directories. It was so autistic, I loved it.

I understand that some of it is still around, like Soulseek.
I still remember getting a warez intro once.

 

[Celebrate Nite]

Everybody's sharing one network folder, everyone can do whatever they want to anybody else's shit, including deleting, and boss's stuff is part of the folder too.

I would NOT want to be working there if i knew that was happening. One of two things (or both) would be happening on the daily.

• Dumbasses not knowing what things are so they wind up deleting it
• Some karen/faggot with too much time on their hands or has some vendetta against you is going to be spying on your shit to see whether or not you have files there that "you're not supposed to have".

 

[Shlomo XL]

Got a job in an IT-adjacent service firm that maintains commercial railway access control/ticketing infrastructure such as ticket machines, gates and info terminals. Said railway's operator sets specs for the tech we (and a bunch of related companies) work with and it's up to us to cobble said tech together so it meets the standard. "Slapped together and sealed with Krazy Glue" would describe it well.

So far we got:

• Specific chinese mobos that are no longer in production that you, with a lighter, heat up the CPU of so they start up;
• Specific LCD displays that cost 10x that of their functionally identical counterparts that are diagonally 0.1 inch larger;
• Ripping shit out of functional units to make non-functional ones work (we're on a ticket-based system with a time window);
• Buttering up transport wardens, station overseers etc. so they give us - personally - a heads-up before making a ticket;
• Deploying senior technicians quite literally 2 train stops ahead of inspectors in case something breaks during their visit;
• Praying to Machine God daily that all of the given station's infrastructure starts up normally after the nightly shutdown;
• And, of course, the commuters asking "So, this thing isn't working, then?" while a given machine's guts are strewn across the station floor, or trying to trample me and a buddy working on a gate during rush hour.

It's fun as hell, but also unpleasantly insightful.

 

[HahaYes]

Everybody's sharing one network folder, everyone can do whatever they want to anybody else's shit, including deleting, and boss's stuff is part of the folder too.

When they get breached they are so absolutely fucked it's unreal, that's a massive risk of insider threat as well. All it'll take is one pissed off employee and a badly configured backup schedule, impact for days