What are some cool and hip compliments to give your neighbor at the urinal?

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Usually I just look over and say, "Wow! That's a whopper!" but I feel like after a while, all the regulars at the urinals I frequent have already heard it. I need new material but I don't want to go on the TickTocks because that's gay. How do I find out what the cool hip kids are saying about each other's dongs while throwing a whizz?

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

'do you faint from the blood rush when you get hard?'
'wow your boyfriend must have an arsehole like a NYC manhole'
'nice dick where's the rest of it?'


In all honesty there is absolutely no need for a man to ever have a urinal neighbour.
We're men.We can piss anywhere.
If there's no room wait 30 seconds we're men we piss then leave not gaggle like chicks.

 

[radicalradishranger]

At the urinals I ask what moisturizer men use for their foreskins (yes I'm British we have foreskins here) because mine gets a little chaffed when I wank too much. Every since my stupid GP put me on prozac it takes ages to cum.

 

[clara red bottoms]

You got some fries with that shake?

 

[Kris]

Some others are talking about aim but that's too low rent. You wanna start complimenting his stream and splash-back rate. Urine color is optional too but that one you've really gotta stick the landing on.

"Whoah dude. Tight stream there, you've been hitting the gym? Your kegel routine must have you totally yoked. Only 2.73% splas-back too... Bro... And it's crystal clear? Bro what's your hydration stack like?"

You wanna stick to talking about this like you're at the gym. Modern scientists can't explain it but for some reason attempting to say this exact same stuff but using military jargon or something somehow makes you sound even more like a cock smoker than the above example.

 

[Ventrue]

Use some of your Juggalo speak "Yo, homer dog how that Faygo? whoop whoop". Maybe by chance it would resonate with the guy you're talking to.

 

[dick brain]

In all honesty there is absolutely no need for a man to ever have a urinal neighbour.
We're men.We can piss anywhere.
If there's no room wait 30 seconds we're men we piss then leave not gaggle like chicks.

"I see you're humping the urinal because you're afraid I might see your dick."

 

[cleanerfromvenus]

"I got you" then you flush for them.

 

[Le b0wski]

'wow your boyfriend must have an arsehole like a NYC manhole'

Hard wearing and used for the good of the city?

 

[Adolf Hulkler]

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

Hard wearing and used for the good of the city?

big enough for a man to get into feet first