What do you do if you hit someone with a car?

[IAmNotAlpharius]

Does anyone know any good body shops? Preferably ones that are discrete. I tried to swerve out of the way but it was too late. Initially I thought I had hit a small animal but when I looked through my rear view mirror I realized the thing was a furry. In my defense once I noticed it was a furry I backed over it a few extra times just to be sure.

 

[CWCinbed]

Did they glow? If so, just keep on driving-- that's what you do.

 

[thismanlies]

Okay here's what you fucking do.

Find a car that looks exactly like yours. You don't want to keep your old car because that thing's caked in evidence. Once I ran over a blanket that was on the interstate doing around 75 mph. I didn't notice that the polyester melted to my exhaust until I pulled into my driveway and my neighbor asked me what I ran over (my dog uses that blanket to this day, he fucking loves it). So yeah, you likely have pieces of fur suit stuck to the bottom of your car and you're never getting it off. Next, you befriend some Mexicans. You don't want the Mexicans who think calling themselves "latinx" isn't worth an ass whoopin. You want the ones who call each other Guatemalans when they do something stupid. You have those guys go through your car and cut out the VIN numbers and weld them to your new car. Lastly, you find a crusher. You may have to go a few towns over, but you definitely want that thing ground to bits.

 

[MrTroll]

Personally, I'd brag about it in a rap song.