What do you like about Ethan Ralph? - Unironically.

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Magic Sun Daddy

Magic Sun Daddy

Get on the ball, bitch.
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 5, 2017
In recent times, Ethan Oliver Ralph has shown himself to be one of the most consistently entertaining lolcows discussed on this site. From his constant trouble with the law, to his hair trigger temper, to his bizarre attempts at flexing on people much more successful than him, Ethan Ralph stands head and shoulders above others in his sector (though not for the reasons he would claim.) Yet, despite being a living caricature of everything that's wrong with America, I'm able to find one or two things I genuinely like about the Gunt. I decided to make this thread to pay a bit of lip service to him, seeing as how he's provided us all with such entertainment over the years.

I kind of like his taste in music.

When you think of Ralph and his music taste, you usually think of the moments of him engaging in acts of unintentional humiliation, from him doing the truffle shuffle in the parking lot of a 7/11, to celebrating not having to do jail time for being a sex offender. Classic moments all around, but most of the songs he plays are songs that I find myself vibing to in my day to day life. I'll be honest, Step by Step was a great song to open and cap off his streams.


His old streams are genuinely fun to listen to.

A lot of people caulk up Ralph's success with Metokur's constant presence on his classic streams and you're not going to hear me argue otherwise, but I think it's only fair to give the devil it's due. Back when Ralph was at least a functioning drunk, he was more than capable of holding his own in discussions with his guests. He knew when to let them go at it and when it was best to chime in with questions.

...

I'll be honest, I thought I'd have more to say. You could say a lot about how funny it is to see him rage and seethe but I think it's more interesting to try and find the small kernels of gold buried within the giant turd that is Ralph. Do you have anything nice to say about the gunt? Shitposts and sarcasm are always welcome, but I want to see people really wrack their brains for some genuine compliments.
 
Have seen some things he has done and i don't care, he is just someone you could find everywhere nothing special. If anything he is obnoxious loud but if you want me to find something positive i have to give him credit for his tenacity to keep on gunting.
 
Hope for small-dicked men everywhere! You too can seduce otherwise independent men like Jim Metokur and Dick Masterson with your tiny willy. Assuming you can figure out his secrets!
 
I like Piggy for his selfless sacrifice on the corn altar. No other man had the testicular fortitude to put a torch to his life, for our entertainment.
I unironically wish Piggy to live a long life and I truly loath any faggot that impedes Piggy in his endeavors. I especially dislike those that try to do him physical harm (faggot Cog) or interact with him via retarded gayops (faggot kinochet). These things go against this site's zeitgeist.
Just observe the hog in the bog.

gunt_mathematics.png
 
He has the potential to become the next chris chan or spax3. That in itself, is a great quality.
 
I've said this before somewhere, but I think ER is actually not dumb. He has loads of other issues and he probably killed most of his IQ via various ways, but whenever I listen to him I get the impression he is relatively smart.

What I'm saying is he wasn't born a retard, this was nurture and not nature.

So I guess I kinda like that he can talk quite well when he is focused and as sober as he could be.
 
His taste in music? He plays jungle beats like 99% of the time. Whenever I tune in he is listening to some neighbor singing about asses and whores and drugs n shieeet. It actually makes his streams insufferable to watch on top of how boring they are.
 
McSchlomo said:
I've said this before somewhere, but I think ER is actually not dumb. He has loads of other issues and he probably killed most of his IQ via various ways, but whenever I listen to him I get the impression he is relatively smart.

What I'm saying is he wasn't born a retard, this was nurture and not nature.

So I guess I kinda like that he can talk quite well when he is focused and as sober as he could be.
Click to expand...

Ralph is the living embodiment of the separation between intelligence and wisdom. Ralph knows some two dollar words he looks up on dictionary.com, sure, and was almost able to get a basic college degree; probably average to just barely below average intelligence. Ralph has never been wise, though. He doesn't know how to apply anything he learns in a positive way, and just makes the same retard mistakes over and over because he's too much of a prideful dick to have any humility or ability to introspect. It puts a low ceiling on an already low foundation that is the Ralphamale's mental faculties, and thus the result was always going to be a raging fat man typing screeds on his myspace blog from Mexico because he refuses to grow in any way, and has never show the ability to grow in any way. That's why he was a lazy piece of shit NEET for his whole life into he fell ass backwards into a modicum of E-fame.

But, answering the question, Ralph's dancing is always good for a laugh, as is his ability to be easily manipulated into doing funny things to 'own' random faggots on the internet.
 
I like that Ralph is a fat retard who lacks the self awareness to not broadcast his stupidity for my enjoyment and he does it for free.
 
I like than Ethan Ralph is the poster child for the terminally online loser who can never log off but is constantly obsessed with criticism about himself while his body turns into Lovecraftian horrors. He’s got this lack of normality I find curious because any casual mention of Ethan Ralph brings up horror in the average person, and yet he’s found this little niche on the internet he can grift and make a living off of. Ralph’s life isn’t what a normal person would call “living” but because Ralph is always online it doesn’t matter, that’s his winning.
 
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