What if you woke up as allah?

[lolcow yoghurt]

Haram answers will be reported

 

[TheSaltySpitoon]

Declare the Nation of Islam to be the only true and honest branch if Islam and appoint Ice Cube as the new prophet.

It’d be funny.

 

[Neo-Nazi Rich Evans]

commit an act of god against 𝕋ℍ𝔼 ℂ𝕌𝔹𝔼

 

[Swingletonthesimpleton]

Immediately wipe Muslims from existence.

IMMEDIATELY

 

[not william stenchever]

Find out which demon was impersonating me when they were talking to Mohammed and then send a host of angels to smack their nuts.

 

[Lovely Kin]

Make the kaaba explode during their pilgrimage season

 

[Endless Torment]

Turn the kaaba into the buffalo cube

 

[DankSmoker]

Does Allah even have magical powers? I'd probably just try to sleep it off.

 

[Ventrue]

Declare 9/11 a sacred holiday where 9,996 Muslims are killed in every city. To represent the 2,996 that died on that day and the 7,000 that died from the exposure to the toxic dust.

 

[Daddy's Angry Juice]

Id probably have uncontrollable urge (not devo) to rape little girls

 

[The Lawgiver]

face towards mecca and admire the cube.

 

[2mm and 99 others]

Does Allah even have magical powers? I'd probably just try to sleep it off.

Doesn't seem so, for instance, you can hide in a car with your bottle of booze, and he can't see you drinking.

I'd annihilate all muslims, because they misunderstood everything and listened to a false prophet, thus were islaming wrong the entire time, but that doesn't quite seem doable.

 

[OrionBalls]

I'd get the Super Best Friends back together. I miss Seaman.

 

[Soy Fed]

Declare pedophilia haram. Make incest cause some sort of deadly prion disease. Set english as the official language of Islam. Resurrect the German population as it was in the year 1900 and make a new continent for them to do their thing, tell everyone that's Atlantis and they need to respect it.