What if?

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autisticdragonkin said:
I don't understand why welfare exists. What is the justification of the welfare state. To me it just seems like parasites leeching off of the productive elements of society but if it were modified (no welfare for criminals) it could become a way to pay people not to commit crime. Are there any other better justifications for the welfare state
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It makes for a good voting block!
 
Cave said:
How do we approach gender equality in the workplace? Specifically, the business world. It's a very interesting question to me, and while I don't ponder it often, sometimes I'll find something relevant to it and wonder until I end up with no answer.

Motherhood is the real kicker here. The business world is competitive. Should a woman be forced not to have children in order to not fall behind in her attempts to reach the top? As one ages, it only becomes harder to birth a child. This is the hard part for me.
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You can also choose a stay at home father. Hey look I don’t wanna can barging in with the “golden answer “ be life is full of tough choices. So you can be a real estate novelist and never have time for a wife, and be talking to Davy who’s still in the Navy and probably will be for life.
 
Cave said:
How do we approach gender equality in the workplace? Specifically, the business world. It's a very interesting question to me, and while I don't ponder it often, sometimes I'll find something relevant to it and wonder until I end up with no answer.
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Interesting question from a time when (in 2015) we had so few genders. Now there are dozens and dozens of genders. Or is it hundreds? Or is it thousands? Or is it personal? Bi-personal/multi-personal/multi-non-personal? Multi-non-fluid-superfluid-personal-non-personal?

If you have a workplace with 30 people containing 15 penises and 15 vaginas, well-formed and one to a customer, it used to be you had 15 each of two genders. Now, everyone has their own gender and it never seems to stay in one color of the spectrum.

When I come into work I'm feeling rather manish as I charge to my desk. Then I sit down, parse through my email and start bitching. Pay cuts are coming and I start to cry. Lunch comes and I want a sandwich and a beer. After lunch, back to work and the gossip mill is running strong. By the end of the day I want to beat the living shit out of a few people but decide to kiss their asses just the same. Sales are shit but it puts food on the table. I take the train home and feel sorry for the woman with the crying child and the worn clothes. I want to kick the ranting asshole in his balls.

I have no idea how many genders I went through in one day, but how do we determine equality? Fuck if I know.
 
The Great Cult

At their root, fourth-wave feminism and the broader social justice movement aren't really about women or minorities at all. It's communist propaganda, meant to suck people into the cult ideology of Marxism. Think: what are the characteristics of cults? Claiming absolute moral righteousness. Considering those who dissent to be evil, and justifying violence or career-destruction against them. Using a new, invented vocabulary amongst themselves which makes cult members feel smart, erudite, and "in" on profound secrets about the world, including knowledge of inchoate entities like the "patriarchy" which are believed to underlie the functioning of society. (Supernatural concepts of gods and devils serve the same purpose). Encouraging cult members to cut off old relationships with naysayers and skeptics in favor of their new, "enlightened" friends who never question the dogma. Complete devotion, with cult members basing their entire identities on belief in the ideology, and behaving in self-destructive ways which only worsen their physical and mental health. Angry denial of any quantifiable evidence that cuts against their beliefs.
 
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hʌɪˈpəːbəli said:
What if your father and mother never met?
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You wouldn't be here to ask that question.

Your mother may have a child with a different man, and they may grow up similarly to you, but at the end of the day, you would not be YOU.

Then again, I am of the belief that we are formed by everything that happens to us as we percieve it up to and including the moment we take any action, including the choice, consciously or otherwise, to NOT take action. Would this 'not-you' be a kiwi? Your guess is as good as mine.
 
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What if John Oliver made a thread on here, saying he was going to make an episode about kiwi farms, and asked what kiwi farms means to you? He also attaches video evidence of him creating an account and making the thread so you know it’s him.
 
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Floop said:
What if John Oliver made a thread on here, saying he was going to make an episode about kiwi farms, and asked what kiwi farms means to you? He also attaches video evidence of him creating an account and making the thread so you know it’s him.
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If it had any positive init he'd be cancel'd by a bunch of numpties and I'd feel bad for him. But first I would post something pretty gay and emotional because that's my personality type.
 
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Floop said:
What if John Oliver made a thread on here, saying he was going to make an episode about kiwi farms, and asked what kiwi farms means to you? He also attaches video evidence of him creating an account and making the thread so you know it’s him.
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I would call him a limey faggot, and explain in great detail how much I would laugh if I ever see a Buzzfeed article about how internet trolls nailed him into a crate of tea and threw it into the boston harbor, resulting in his death via drowning in tea.
 
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Floop said:
What if John Oliver made a thread on here, saying he was going to make an episode about kiwi farms, and asked what kiwi farms means to you? He also attaches video evidence of him creating an account and making the thread so you know it’s him.
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It's a place full of nice people where I don't have to agonize over what I write, since the KF community isn't dominated by obsessive lunatics looking for any way to get one another in trouble, on the boards or in real life. Forums with voting systems that sort content by vote count turn into popularity contests, generally favoring whomever promotes what the general hivemind likes, so lots of snippy replies get favored over any thoughtful discussion. Many other forums without voting mechanics but with heavy-handed rules turn into games-of-gotcha, where the community seems more interested in combing through one another's posts, looking for anything to pretend to be offended by in order to virtue signal and get the other user in trouble with the mods.

Many people here would be happy to see the lolcows they follow actually get their shit together. You can find countless times when kind people have reached out to CWC trying to help, only to have been bitten by him in some way. But, there are serious rules and a strong stigma against bullying or trying to abuse anyone, like how we've coined the term "a-log", and how there's even a megathread dedicated to naming and shaming anyone who tries to bully CWC. If I somehow became a public figure and ended up with a thread on KF, I'd take it as a serious wake-up call, and reach out to the posters to find out what exactly I need to do to fix my life.

But, it's John Oliver, and I wouldn't trust him to take anything said here in good faith. I'd expect his staff to just fire up a few sockpuppets that would post ridiculous garbage, and use that to portray the forum in exactly whichever light is best for the show. And probably a couple of random posts where someone said "nigger".
 
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Pissmaster General said:
It's a place full of nice people where I don't have to agonize over what I write, since the KF community isn't dominated by obsessive lunatics looking for any way to get one another in trouble, on the boards or in real life. Forums with voting systems that sort content by vote count turn into popularity contests, generally favoring whomever promotes what the general hivemind likes, so lots of snippy replies get favored over any thoughtful discussion. Many other forums without voting mechanics but with heavy-handed rules turn into games-of-gotcha, where the community seems more interested in combing through one another's posts, looking for anything to pretend to be offended by in order to virtue signal and get the other user in trouble with the mods.

Many people here would be happy to see the lolcows they follow actually get their shit together. You can find countless times when kind people have reached out to CWC trying to help, only to have been bitten by him in some way. But, there are serious rules and a strong stigma against bullying or trying to abuse anyone, like how we've coined the term "a-log", and how there's even a megathread dedicated to naming and shaming anyone who tries to bully CWC. If I somehow became a public figure and ended up with a thread on KF, I'd take it as a serious wake-up call, and reach out to the posters to find out what exactly I need to do to fix my life.

But, it's John Oliver, and I wouldn't trust him to take anything said here in good faith. I'd expect his staff to just fire up a few sockpuppets that would post ridiculous garbage, and use that to portray the forum in exactly whichever light is best for the show. And probably a couple of random posts where someone said "nigger".
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I think the ending message would be to let internet weirdos be internet weirdos, until he gets shit for it and he spends the last quarter of the next episode going “I was misinformed, kiwi farms bad”
 
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We're just organic sludge on a space rock.
Our lives are pointless and dedicated to things that don't even exist in objective reality.

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What if some random guy you meet on the street/subway/bus/whatsoever if you know about a website kiwi farms? Will you be honest or will you lie?
 
This just crossed my mind.

What if plants were like animals and animals were like plants? I know that sounds weird, but I was seriously brooding about that. Imagine if animals had to live by photosynthesis and stay rooted and plants were the ones that got to move around and eat the way animals do. In a way, plants and animals would keep certain traits and swap others.
 
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I have two what if scenarios to share.

1) What if you found out that you're a puppet? As in a literal puppet. Your "death" would be realizing that you are just a puppet and that your whole life was more than just a lie, it was a performance!

2) What if your home was considered a popular tourist destination?
 
What if your post-death experience is shaped by your beliefs of the afterlife? For example, Christians experience a heaven or hell depending on their conscience, atheists experience nothing, etc.
 
What if Jimmy Saville molested Dora the Explorer?

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