Containment What If?

Whining on facebook is about the most we can expect from Chris anymore.

Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

He hasn't learned any good housekeeping habits, but he's not quite the hoarder his mother is, so the place would end up looking like Chris' room. But I wonder if he's responsible enough to pay bills, take out the trash or do his laundry without :snorlax: around to tell him. That's one of the true reasons he wants a sweetheart so much; he wants to get away but he doesn't want to take on the responsibilities of living on his own. Living on his own would actually improve his chances (not enough, but an improvement non the less) of finding a sweetheart, after all, what boyfriend-free girl wants to date a guy in his 30s that still lives with his mom? not to mention that Barb won't allow any outsiders into the hoard at this point anyway.
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

I think he probably is as much a hoarder as Barb. He attaches sentimental value to objects and refuses to throw them away (an example is the clown doll which was infamous for standing in for Clyde Cash during fits of rage). While he may not have the same yearnings for knick knacks as his mother I could imagine him as the kind of guy to throw garbage wherever or say that a q-sand wrapper reminds him of his mother.
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

Dork Of Ages said:
He would soon find the landlord to be Coldhearted and Mean when his rent payment is due, after spending much of it on vidya.

"Mr Chandler, your rent is five months overdue!"
"I'M WORKIN ON IT! JEW!"
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

He'd probably be more isolated than he already is since Barb isn't there and he's too lazy and inept to reach out socially. And due to STRESS he wouldn't do any home maintenance such as cleaning, laundry, or taking out the garbage.
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

Living alone can be hard (I love it actually) ad we'd hear about it all the time.
Even if he pulled a six figure salary (lol) he'd still forget to pay his rent and get evicted.
After eviction he'd squirm on the floor and feel violated as the movers clean out his apartment. They'd need a cleaning service to handle the rotten food and :briefs: He'd never see his security deposit, he would think getting it back was BASICALLY PROMISED! His landlord could take him to small claims if the clean up costs more than his security covers, and we all know how he handles court.

OT but can the word promised be filtered to BASICALLY PROMISED
 
Chris would whine about the death of Meg Griffin on facebook if he still watches Family Guy. He'd also probably blame it on the trolls if he was really attached to the character.
 
If the gods are good, maybe make a Very Special Sonichu fix fic about him going back in time to save Meg. And then of course her rewarding him with sex.

I think it was Gonterman who did one of those for Sally Acorn.
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

DIRTY, CRAPPED DWELLING

He'd have to have a roommate, but Chris can't get along with anyone, so he'd have to move out every few months once they got tired of him.

He'd spend all his money on vidya and Hungryman dinners and refuse to pay rent, thinking the landlord is trolling him. It wouldn't end well.
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

:briefs: , q-sand wrappers, Hungry Man trays, empty Orange Fanta cans and Bud bawdles everywhere, bedbugs, sugar ants, trash not taken out, more crap stains on the chair from his room, Sonichu drawn on the walls, holes in the doors and walls from tard rage, possible flooding from burst pipes or fire from an overheated electronic device, inevitable eviction, small-claims court, all his belongings disposed of, then the Hobo Saga.

This assuming he doesn't have the thought to move into an extended-stay hotel (cheap, usually centrally located, weekly maid service that would ensure he'd have reasonably clean conditions, managers usually tolerate anything up to drug dealing and gun violence) or have a social worker and home health aide.
 
At this point, he'd probably just blame Megan.
 
Re: What If Our Pet Lolcow Ate Surstromming?

BEST THREAD EVER !!!!!
 
Re: What If Our Pet Lolcow Ate Surstromming?

Chris would know what he tastes like if he ate himself.
 
Re: What If Our Pet Lolcow Ate Surstromming?

Mourning Dove said:
Chris would know what he tastes like if he ate himself.
You're right, I don't think fermented herring and Chris-chan would taste much different, or smell much different.
 
Re: What If Our Pet Lolcow Ate Surstromming?

It's still better than Australian Vegimite. Poor hobos :cryblood:
 
Re: What if Chris moved into a house or apartment by himself

We'd need to find a place where the utilities are rolled into the bill or something, or he'd probably forget to pay them. He'd probably forget to pay the rent, but I'm sure someone would remind him. I feel like this rolls back into the whole "Group home" discussion.
 
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