Containment What If?

What if Sega did every single one of Chris's business demands?
 
Vault Boy said:
They'd go out of business, and Chris would stress sigh. He'd then shit himself, and do nothing.

What if the Relics of Fail were Horcruxes?
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Then Chris would never die because nobody would ever find every in that horde. Every curse-ye-ha-me-ha puts a different part of his intersex tranny lesbian soul in another piece of crap.

What if curse-ye-ha-me-ha really worked?
 
Garfieldchu said:
Then Chris would never die because nobody would ever find every in that horde. Every curse-ye-ha-me-ha puts a different part of his intersex tranny lesbian soul in another piece of crap.

What if curse-ye-ha-me-ha really worked?
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What if Chris was the main villain in a God of War game?
 
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What if Chris became a avgn ripoff inspired game reviewer
 
What if Chris actually got smart, fixed his issues, and made money off of his life story? He'd finally be at peace, have a steady source of income. We could all move on with our lives.

I can already see what Hollywood would do with his life story.

Get Wes Anderson or Noah Baumbach behind the director's chair. Have Jonah Hill take a more tragic role as Chris. Meryl Streep plays Barb, Max von Sydow (or some other sinister looking old guy) as Bob. Chris himself will have a cameo as a prank caller shouting "JULAAAAAY!" in a montage.

Criterion Collection, here we come.
 
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StarvingAutist said:
What if Chris actually got smart, fixed his issues, and made money off of his life story? He'd finally be at peace, have a steady source of income. We could all move on with our lives.

I can already see what Hollywood would do with his life story.

Get Wes Anderson or Noah Baumbach behind the director's chair. Have Jonah Hill take a more tragic role as Chris. Meryl Streep plays Barb, Max von Sydow (or some other sinister looking old guy) as Bob. Chris himself will have a cameo as a prank caller shouting "JULAAAAAY!" in a montage.

Criterion Collection, here we come.
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Michael Cera as Liquid Chris? McLovin as Clyde Cash? Emma Stone as Ivy? I'd watch.
 
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Vault Boy said:
They'd go out of business, and Chris would stress sigh. He'd then shit himself, and do nothing.

What if the Relics of Fail were Horcruxes?
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Who says they're not?

The Sonichu Plushie - contains Christopher Weston Chandler, destroyed by Chris himself

The High School Ring - Contains the teenage CWC

The Original Sonichu Medallion - Contains the part of his soul that manifested as Chris Chan Sonichu. Destroyed by a troll

The Heart Torch - Contains the part of his soul that manifested as his twin sister Crystal, destroyed in the fire.

Patti - Contains the small part of CWC that knew how to love, destroyed upon her passing.

The Sonic Totem - Contains the adult "Strait" CWC

And finally, the Horcrux CWC never intended to make,

Liquid Chris - Contains a broken fragment of Solid Chris, destroyed when the false and dishonest CWC shot him in the legs. The remainder was destroyed by Solid's own hand when his Curse-ye-ha-me-ha rebounded on himself during the final battle.

Only three fragments remain, the ring, the totem, and the bit inside Christine Weston Chandler. Anyone hoping to end CWC must first destroy the ring and the totem first.
 
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Garfieldchu said:
Michael Cera as Liquid Chris? McLovin as Clyde Cash? Emma Stone as Ivy? I'd watch.
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Shailene Woodley would make a good Megan.

Sonichu (or a lawyer-friendly stand in) should be voiced by Frankie Muniz. Don't know why, something about Sonic OCs remind me of his voice.
 
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