Containment What If?

This website wouldn't exist since Baby Chris would never learn how to use the internet.
What if Chris challenged all his enemies to a real life Mario Kart race?
What if Chris challenged his enemies to a Deagle Nation style drag/drift race?
 
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He wouldn't wish for legos and mcdonalds. His wishes would be:

1. To be a biological woman
2. To have a true and honest lesbian sweetheart forever and ever
3. Infinite money

The real question would be: How would the genie then grant those wishes in the worst way possible?

1. He would replace Chris's genitalia with lady parts but change nothing else, keeping him looking like the same gross fat balding cat lady as before. (Chris wouldn't care since he already thinks he's a hot sexy lady)
2. The sweetheart would be another gross fat lesbian like Chris who is just as horrible, lazy, and poor as he is.
3. His infinite money would cause the value of the dollar to drop to zero, making it worthless.

Genies in most folktales do tend to fuck over their "master" with the wishes. So this is probably accurate. The only horrific thing is Chris' third wish would fuck us all over (not that he'd care about the rest of the world)
 
I've always wondered what would happen to Chris if he had a sibling a good four-five years his elder, male or female. With an elder figure that wasn't fictional or a living fossil like his parents how would his understanding of the world change? Likewise if he had a severely autistic younger sibling born while he was a toddler to young child.
 
What would happen if 14 year-old Christian meets 34 year-old Christine?
 
What would happen if 14 year-old Christian meets 34 year-old Christine?
Well, the simple formula for this would be:
:| x ;) = :autism: squared

What if Chris actually managed to win in the sex move battle against Johan?
 
What would happen if 14 year-old Christian meets 34 year-old Christine?
Young Chris would be absolutely traumatized, and Old Chris would shit his panties and do nothing.

What if Chris has his consciousness uploaded into a robot before he dies?
 
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Chris 2.0 would blow smoke out of his exhaust pipe and do nothing.

What would happen if 14 year-old Christian meets 34 year-old Christine?
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